jeans at dinner?

[GhostlyHitchhiker]

Along with logan's excellent post, this one is very true about how we feel. Yes, someone not adhering to the dress code/suggestions can impact your dining experience. On our last cruise this happened on formal night. Around 7 pm (during early seating so yes, they were unfashionably late to dinner) a family of four at the the table next to us decided to make a statement to the effect of "it's our vacation & we don't care what anyone else thinks." They were all "dressed" in tank tops / muscle shirts and shorts...like you would wear to work out. When approached by the dining room manager they loudly voiced their opinion of the dress code so that everyone could hear them. The funny thing about it was they had been sitting next to us in Palo the night before dressed to the nines. It wasn't a matter of them not having the appropriate clothes...they just wanted to make a scene. I felt so sorry for our servers...who were also handling their table.

Things like this will happen no matter what the dress code is. There will ALWAYS be people who want to "make a statement" or just not adhere to the rules at all. Why should those of us who follow the guidelines be made to adhere to stricter rules to "stop" this from happening?

If you have ever worked in retail or the service industry at all, you will know that there are people that can never be pleased no matter what you do. There will always be people who will think they are exempt from the rules no matter how strict or lax they are. There are always going to be those people who just ENJOY breaking the rules. And finally there are those that just don't CARE.

Making rules based on what those people *might* do is not the way to go. You base rules on what the majority will do, and the majority of people stick to DCL's Guidelines, no matter what they are. No one should ever be looked down upon or thought less of for following DCL's rules.

 

[logan1_2000]

I love the Tom Hanks movie, "Big". His first Oscar nomination,if you recall. Wonderfully directed by Penny Marshall.

So for those who recall the movie, which I watched last night w/ DS to get our minds off the Braves' numbing 18 inning loss (guess I don't have Monday night plans to go to game #5 after all...), visualize----

That Liberace-esqe rhinestoned White tie and white tails outfit he wore to the company party.

Just thought of it in connection w/ this thread about dressing appropriately. I guess that was appropriate, if comical. And if such a get up was worn by the DCL guest at the next table from me on formal night--I'd probably send over a drink in tribute for the humor it would provide. No real point.

We now resume our regularly scheduled dress code thread....

 

[mrsltg]

The funny thing about this thread is that my dh, the ultimate parrot head, is annoyed that DCL relented and okayed jeans in the restaurants at dinner. Yes, jeans are now acceptable dress code. They do not, however, invoke the feel of the classic ocean line atmosphere that DCL was going for. There is a time and a place for everything, and jeans or shorts in a dining room is not one of them. It won't ruin my cruise to see someone dressed in jeans in Lumiere's, but it will deduct from the atmosphere.

As far as the "Who knows what the family can afford" argument, frankly it doesn't wash. You are not going to spend $2-many thousands of dollars on a vacation and not be able to invest in a $16 pair of khakis from Old Navy.

Erin

 

[atakaratemom]

As far as the "Who knows what the family can afford" argument, frankly it doesn't wash. You are not going to spend $2-many thousands of dollars on a vacation and not be able to invest in a $16 pair of khakis from Old Navy.

I most humbly disagree with this statement. I think it is wrong to ever assume what someone else is able to afford. Just because someone is on a Disney Cruise does not mean that they have a lot of money to spare. I know that on many cruises there are Make-A-Wish families on board. They may not have the ability to buy a new wardrobe for the cruise. Also, many people are treated to the cruise by parents, grandparents or others. Are we to assume what their financial position is? Maybe someone paid for the cruise well in advance and their finances have changed. It is not for us to judge others, and it is certainly not fair to think that you know what others can or cannot afford.

 

[mrsltg]

I most humbly disagree with this statement. I think it is wrong to ever assume what someone else is able to afford. Just because someone is on a Disney Cruise does not mean that they have a lot of money to spare. I know that on many cruises there are Make-A-Wish families on board. They may not have the ability to buy a new wardrobe for the cruise. Also, many people are treated to the cruise by parents, grandparents or others. Are we to assume what their financial position is? Maybe someone paid for the cruise well in advance and their finances have changed. It is not for us to judge others, and it is certainly not fair to think that you know what others can or cannot afford.

I still don't buy it. If that's the case where will you get the "nice" jeans that are required? Those cost about the same at Target, Wal Mart, K Mart, Old Navy, Gap, etc etc etc as do khakis. It's an excuse. Wear jeans if you want - it's certainly allowed, but don't say it's because the khakis cost too much.

Erin

 

[MandM22]

the jeans AND sneakers puts you over the edge? Live and let live.... some people can barely scrape the money together to pay for the cruise... adding formal dress clothes or even "casual dress clothes" may not be an option or part of their wardrobe to begin with. Perhaps they work at a restaurant, wear a uniform, who knows....

No matter how anyone else dresses, my dream vacation will not be ruined nor will it stop me from dreaming up a new vacation. Sorry, bring the flames on... but we should NOT sit in judgement of others. Just my humble opinion....

I couldn't agree with you more. Maybe that's why some choose a Disney cruise over others.

 

[atakaratemom]

I still don't buy it. If that's the case where will you get the "nice" jeans that are required? Those cost about the same at Target, Wal Mart, K Mart, Old Navy, Gap, etc etc etc as do khakis. It's an excuse. Wear jeans if you want - it's certainly allowed, but don't say it's because the khakis cost too much.

I am not comparing the cost of khakis and jeans. I am just saying that if khakis and dress shirts are not part of someone's regular everyday wardrobe, it is unfair to assume that every family can afford to go out and buy extra clothes for the cruise.

 

[MrsMork]

I most humbly disagree with this statement. I think it is wrong to ever assume what someone else is able to afford. Just because someone is on a Disney Cruise does not mean that they have a lot of money to spare. I know that on many cruises there are Make-A-Wish families on board. They may not have the ability to buy a new wardrobe for the cruise. Also, many people are treated to the cruise by parents, grandparents or others. Are we to assume what their financial position is? Maybe someone paid for the cruise well in advance and their finances have changed. It is not for us to judge others, and it is certainly not fair to think that you know what others can or cannot afford.

A few words....consignment/resale shops. I do not buy it that people cannot afford slacks but can afford "nice" jeans. I can get dress slacks on sale for way less than the "nice" jeans in our area. Nice jackets for both men and boys can be bought at consignment/resale shops for less than $10.

We are grandparents that treated our children/grandchildren to a 4 day cruise. We outfitted all 5 grandkids in nice slacks, jackets for the boys, dressy dress for the girl for very little money. Our DSIL did not have a jacket so we loaned him one of DH's. Our then 3 yo DGS LOVED his dress clothes, especially his tie. He liked the dress shoes so much that he insisted on wearing them with his bathing suit the next day. Bought on sale for less than $10, they were a wonderful bargain. The group looked great on Triton night and I got a wonderful family photograph.

Were other families around us dressed as we were? I don't know, but I do know that my grandchildren experienced "dining" vs. "eating dinner" and yes, how we were dressed added to that.

 

[Kim&Chris]

I most humbly disagree with this statement. I think it is wrong to ever assume what someone else is able to afford. Just because someone is on a Disney Cruise does not mean that they have a lot of money to spare. I know that on many cruises there are Make-A-Wish families on board. They may not have the ability to buy a new wardrobe for the cruise. Also, many people are treated to the cruise by parents, grandparents or others. Are we to assume what their financial position is? Maybe someone paid for the cruise well in advance and their finances have changed. It is not for us to judge others, and it is certainly not fair to think that you know what others can or cannot afford.

I've been following this thread for a while now. Atakaratemom, I could not agree with you more.

It cracks me up that people get annoyed at other people's attire! Who really cares??!! You're on a cruise, so enjoy your time on the beautiful ship and don't worry so much about what other people are wearing.

Maybe the family who is dressed in jeans is also the the family that saved change in a jar for years to save up for the cruise. Maybe the jeans they're wearing were the best they could do. Why should they wear consignment clothing? To make others happy? Kinda reminds me of high school, when people were ostracized (sp?) for not having the cool sneakers

However, on the other hand, maybe the people in jeans are the ones who generally don't give a crap about dress codes. Either way, the Magic will still sail to the next port, life will go on, and all cruisers will have a wonderful time (no matter what they pack)!

 

[Aisling]

I may start a separate thread about what our servers told us about the dress code.

Do! I'm curious!

 

[GhostlyHitchhiker]

A few words....consignment/resale shops. I do not buy it that people cannot afford slacks but can afford "nice" jeans. I can get dress slacks on sale for way less than the "nice" jeans in our area. Nice jackets for both men and boys can be bought at consignment/resale shops for less than $10.

No one yet has responded to my dress shoe example earlier in the thread. Not everyone can just run out to Old Navy, K-mart or Walmart for their clothing. Some sizes aren't available there, etc.

If DCL has changed the guidelines, then that should very well be the end of the debate, yet it goes on time and again. I can understand the people that want the Classic Cruising Attire that Disney originally went for, but they have changed the rules. Either they are doing so because MOST of the people cruising want it changed, or they want to be more "family friendly" as a cruise line. Either way, the change is made and to judge other people by what they wear is just wrong.

Everyone seems to be making large assumptions on what others can/cannot afford to do and making judgements on people's character based on what they wear to dinner. I don't shop in consignment stores/second hand stores, etc. Certainly that's me and there are a lot of people who shop at those stores, but I personally couldn't wear something someone I didn't know owned and wore. I am lucky that I can afford shop where I wish, but I have known people who couldn't afford to just run out and buy a new wardrobe for vacation (even at Walmart, when you're talking about a family of 4 that's a LOT of clothing) and often those people didn't like the idea of second hand stores either.

When I go on vacation or even go out to dinner, I do follow common sense. I wear what is appropriate and if there are dress codes I follow them. I don't complain, I don't whine, I sometimes enjoy it, but at the same time I don't judge others for not doing so. And I most certainly don't look down on other people for following the same guidelines if they aren't wearing something as nice as I am.

It may seem like I keep saying it, but it seems like it needs to be said again. People should not be looked down on for following DCL's own guidelines.

 

[johare]

No one yet has responded to my dress shoe example earlier in the thread. Not everyone can just run out to Old Navy, K-mart or Walmart for their clothing. Some sizes aren't available there, etc.

If DCL has changed the guidelines, then that should very well be the end of the debate, yet it goes on time and again. I can understand the people that want the Classic Cruising Attire that Disney originally went for, but they have changed the rules. Either they are doing so because MOST of the people cruising want it changed, or they want to be more "family friendly" as a cruise line. Either way, the change is made and to judge other people by what they wear is just wrong.

Everyone seems to be making large assumptions on what others can/cannot afford to do and making judgements on people's character based on what they wear to dinner. I don't shop in consignment stores/second hand stores, etc. Certainly that's me and there are a lot of people who shop at those stores, but I personally couldn't wear something someone I didn't know owned and wore. I am lucky that I can afford shop where I wish, but I have known people who couldn't afford to just run out and buy a new wardrobe for vacation (even at Walmart, when you're talking about a family of 4 that's a LOT of clothing) and often those people didn't like the idea of second hand stores either.

When I go on vacation or even go out to dinner, I do follow common sense. I wear what is appropriate and if there are dress codes I follow them. I don't complain, I don't whine, I sometimes enjoy it, but at the same time I don't judge others for not doing so. And I most certainly don't look down on other people for following the same guidelines if they aren't wearing something as nice as I am.

It may seem like I keep saying it, but it seems like it needs to be said again. People should not be looked down on for following DCL's own guidelines.

Well said. Often times there is a lot of shopping involved before a cruise as it is. Might be new swimsuits for the kids, casual cruise attire, etc... on top of this you need to put aside $150-$400 for "gratuities" and a few hundred more for shore excursions for the kids. If I am going to cut corners anywhere, it's going to be on those jackets and dressy clothes that might only be worn a couple hours the whole week.

 

[mom2of2]

Well said. Often times there is a lot of shopping involved before a cruise as it is. Might be new swimsuits for the kids, casual cruise attire, etc... on top of this you need to put aside $150-$400 for "gratuities" and a few hundred more for shore excursions for the kids. If I am going to cut corners anywhere, it's going to be on those jackets and dressy clothes that might only be worn a couple hours the whole week.

I'm with you there. I don't give a rat's patute what other people wear or don't wear.

 

[lbgraves]

Hmmm...isn't it time for one of those other great debates yet? Maybe....tipping?

 

[Michelle2]

Well said. Often times there is a lot of shopping involved before a cruise as it is. Might be new swimsuits for the kids, casual cruise attire, etc... on top of this you need to put aside $150-$400 for "gratuities" and a few hundred more for shore excursions for the kids. If I am going to cut corners anywhere, it's going to be on those jackets and dressy clothes that might only be worn a couple hours the whole week.

This is exactly what I am talking about!

 

[Buddy Bear]

Logan: You're the man (or woman?). You expressed my feelings perfectly. I've been cruising for over thirty years. It's a shame that the entire spirit and elegance of a "cruise" is being lost. I hate that it is becoming an "Outback Steakhouse" at sea. If you want 5 star service and 5 star dining, you need to adhere to a 3 star ambience at minimum. There have been times where I've wanted to cruise in "comfy" attire and I've opted for the Windjammer line. This discussion centers on the casual nights. A pair of Dockers are more comfortable than jeans ( particularly in the tropics), take up less room in the suitcase, and look a heck of a lot nicer. The same can be said of a pair of Topsiders etc. as compared to sneakers. I want everyone to enjoy their vacation, but when you are (likely) sharing a table with others... yes, your attire does have an impact on others.

Thank you for the laugh. I guess it would be nice if we all had your money to be cruising on a regular basis for 30 years, but unfortunatly many of us are "common folk" who really don't have that much free time to care or worry about what others are wearing.

 

[Kim&Chris]

Thank you for the laugh. I guess it would be nice if we all had your money to be cruising on a regular basis for 30 years, but unfortunatly many of us are "common folk" who really don't have that much free time to care or worry about what others are wearing.

Perfect post. Count me in as a "common folk" -type as well, and proud to be part of such a group!

 

[DisneyDmbNut]

I have tried to stay out of the "attire" debate..I like to dress up as my job is in construction an denim is the uniform..but I could give a rat's tush if someone wants to wear jeans...why does that encroach upon my dinner or service. People should worry more about themselves than others.
some people do it, and some people don't;but its ok cause its meant to be that way - DJM

 

[SweetSpot]

To me getting on a Disney ship and expecting the elegance of cruising or 5 star meals for thousands is like going to McDonald's and expecting a elegant filet meal for 2. Like McD's and Outback for that matter Disney caters to families. If what people wear and elegance is so important to your cruise there are other ships that cater to elegance.

In this busy world just having my family at the same table as me eating a meal and discussing our day is what dinner on vacation is about. Couldn't care less what anyone around me is wearing.

 

[Disney with Triplets]

Logan: You're the man (or woman?). You expressed my feelings perfectly. I've been cruising for over thirty years. It's a shame that the entire spirit and elegance of a "cruise" is being lost. I hate that it is becoming an "Outback Steakhouse" at sea. If you want 5 star service and 5 star dining, you need to adhere to a 3 star ambience at minimum. There have been times where I've wanted to cruise in "comfy" attire and I've opted for the Windjammer line. This discussion centers on the casual nights. A pair of Dockers are more comfortable than jeans ( particularly in the tropics), take up less room in the suitcase, and look a heck of a lot nicer. The same can be said of a pair of Topsiders etc. as compared to sneakers. I want everyone to enjoy their vacation, but when you are (likely) sharing a table with others... yes, your attire does have an impact on others.

I think the point about the tropics is the greatest point in your post. I conversations about what "cruising" is becomming amuses me. In the day of the cruising tradition, the grand-class cruises were for trans-Atlantic travel for the well-to-do. Roll forward and now were are island hopping with our family and friends.

Some are concerned that jeans will show up on casual night, men might not wear jackets to formal night, and with the mega-sized ships, the "Outback in the water" is just remembering that, Oh, yea, we're vacationing in the tropics, island hopping by day, and no longer have to risk losing our social status if we fail to keep up with the Jones'.