Isn't it a shame.........

Fantasia Sam

I've been here so much longer!
Joined
Feb 5, 2000
Messages
5,250
........... that some people, even those who have gone through the experience themselves have to judge other Disney Brides on what they spend, how they look, what the guests did, how many guests they had etc etc etc and cannot seem to do it in a constructive manner.

I know that everyone is entitled to voice their opinion of course, but isn't it sad that just one comment can make a bride who obviously thought her day was the most magical now makes them feel sad because of maybe one single criticism?

Why can't some people just be happy for others and bite their tongue? Am I the only Bride on here who is NOT thick skinned - I'm sad at my own niavety :(
 
I dont think that anyone was trying to be malicious in thier comments about costs. Honestly, if I was told that the sky was the limit I would probably pulled out all the stops and spent more than that. Unfortuantely for me, I am on a budget, but I truely envy those brides. Those weddings were truely a magical experience, not mine or anyone elses wont be but they got to have her weddings featured. So to me, yes spending that much money boggles my mind, but that is because I cannot afford it. But celebs do it all the time.. Who knows who they may have been.. I am sure that there are plenty of people who get married in Disney Every year that spend WAY MORE than that. After all Cinderella's castle cost like what, 40k?? I think the only thing that TRUELY matters is that her day was great. And I think that you are right. We should never slam another bride for having her fairytale come true.. I hope that she and her prince are happy and healthy and that the memory of that day stays with them forever..

Sorry if I was all over the place and preachy. All I know is that I honestly took for granted the fact that those were really couples with really weddings and not just a show. I appologize for any comments that I may have made that may have made any bride feel any less special, I can tell you one thing though. Sitting watching that special my DF and I wondered why it couldnt be us.. So I pray that everyone on this board, has a happy and healthy wedding day along with the rest of thier lives because that is all that matters, not the dollar amount at the bottom of the bill..
Toni
 
i'm totally with you Fantasia Sam!

my dh and i didn't have a disney wedding...at least, not onsite anyway. when we got married, we just couldn't afford to do it. so instead, we chose a little wedding chapel off-site. it may have looked cheesy to some people, but to us, it was absolutely PERFECT. it was just the 2 of us...no guests...no fuss. we had the wedding that WE wanted. it was amazing and magical...and there's absolutely NOTHING that anyone could say to me that could take that feeling or the memories away from me!

i am envious of the disney brides, but that's just because i would have loved to have that experience...i will get to experience being a disney "bride" soon enough though...we're planning our vow renewal for our 5 year anniversary. and we've already agreed to do an intimate vow renewal at disney!

i sincerely hope that any bride, whether they were married at disney or not, doesn't let ANYONE ruin the memories or feelings they have of their magical day! i love to read about all of the experiences of the brides on this board!!
 
I don't think that people were making the comments to be mean or rude. I think that a lot of us were just amazed at how spectacular some of the weddings were. I don't know, maybe there were some other comments made that I missed which happened to be negative, but the way I took it, everyone is amazed at the cost, but noone is putting anyone down?! That is one problem with READING someone's comment. You never truly understand how the comment was supposed to be made and sometimes when we read something that someone else wrote, we may read it in the context that makes it a bad comment.::yes::
 

I quickly read through the thread I THINK you're talking about here...there's also another one on the CB that I may have popped in on once and haven't really bothered to follow since....

Unless posts were deleted, I don't think I saw anything particularly harsh on the thread here.:confused: The one on the CB....well...with the inlfux of DB refugees...that may have gotten a bit rocky.:o

NOT regarding the Disney Weddings bridal couples -their weddings had already happened, so what's the point in criticizing?- but more an observation of other wedding BBs (most notably the KNOT)...some brides really NEED criticism. I have seen ranting irrational brides tearing their hair out, cursing their new in-laws...acting completely unreasonable...and other brides doing nothing but blowing sunshine and daisies up their ..."egos".;). Or worse, stoking the fires...simply siding with the bride bc they themselves are brides and are projecting what it must be like to be in the OP bride's position.

Its a tense time and its hard to be objective as a bride...sometimes criticism, and I prefer to think of it as a differing viewpoint, might do the frantic bride some good.
 
Originally posted by inloveindisney
I don't think that people were making the comments to be mean or rude. I think that a lot of us were just amazed at how spectacular some of the weddings were. I don't know, maybe there were some other comments made that I missed which happened to be negative, but the way I took it, everyone is amazed at the cost, but noone is putting anyone down?! That is one problem with READING someone's comment. You never truly understand how the comment was supposed to be made and sometimes when we read something that someone else wrote, we may read it in the context that makes it a bad comment.::yes::

Well then maybe I'm not niave, I'm just cynical cos I certainly read otherwise - some of the comments made both here and on the CB led way for one of the brides in question to justify her own reasons as to why she did the Food Network programme, what she thought of it and heck even why she paid the money she did for her custom wedding - I felt it a shame that she even had cause to tell her side so to speak "story".

And lord only knows what the bride with the 70K wedding would have to say about the comments some people have made about her wedding.

Edited in
I also just wanted to add that I am a sensitive soul and do worry alot about other's feelings I would just so hate to read anyone's comments about like that about my wedding.
 
I did make a comment about how much money that was - and feel like I am now being judged. It wasn't rude, mean, or judging. 70K is a lot of money to me wither it is in the bank or in a wedding. I have NEVER seen that much money, ever. If that was their dream wedding, more power to them. I just can't imagine that kind of money. Oh, and I do go into shock when I realize how much debt we are in because of our house... so I guess I have seen more than 70K, on the negative side.

Sorry if I offended anyone, but it remains that 70K is a lot of money regardless of where it is or how it is spent.
 
It's not that people think that 70K is a lot of money that gets me I can obviously understand how some people would think this is a lot of money to spend on a wedding - what upset me was that I felt that some people, I never said who, wrote comments that made me feel like that if I spent that amount of money I had no right to be ungrateful or have any complaints because apparentely Money does not buy happiness and therefore it was my own fault for spending that much money on the wedding in the first placeand I shoud be grateful for all that Disney did for me or I should be grateful that I got on TV and had freebies for it. Even if I accepted to do the show I would still be paying Disney for the wedding and therefore I would still have the right to complain and tell other future brides that I had cause to complain to Disney about some things.

Because I am sensitive this sort of assumption upsets me and that is what unfortunately I have read into some of the comments made both here and on the CB board and it just made me feel sad - which is why I started a post on it so I could understand what people meant when they made their original comments.
 
I agree Sam. I've noticed it here and on the knot....girls are often just catty and spiteful. some have sour grapes that they can't have THAT wedding budget, so they make it seem like they wouldn't DARE spend that kind of money! no flames please, i said SOME girls, not all.

there was a LONG thread on the $70,000 wedding over on the community board that i know men and women were taking part of. and it wasn't all good.

regardless, if i had $70,000 earmarked for a wedding I would have spent it similarly (although i would have invited less people and paid for their expenses :) ). my ex and I went to disney for our honeymoon and spent $600/night on our GF honeymoon suite. some people would think its a waste of money, but you can't trade those memories for anything.

people can do what they wish with their money. i loved everything each of the brides did on that show. from the ice-sculpture sorbet holders, to the RD at Jiko to the Alice in Wonderland Tea Party. I would LOVE to have dinner at the chef's table. that's once in a lifetime!

But no matter what people spent or did, I hope they are happily married! Isn't that the point?

:confused:
 
Oh and I totally understand that we all put different values and priorities on a $ so ofcourse it could be scary to see that money being spent on a wedding.

I think I was also miffed as to why everyone was making some of the comments about money, colour scheme, theme and dress when the show was supposed to be about food. I'm not in the U.S. but I am assuming that is what the programmes on the food network are about?

Isn't there another show called Real weddings or something like that which recently was shown back in February that was specifically about a Disney Wedding in it's totality and not just about the food.

I'm pretty sure that is why Ann and Michael agreed to their wedding being showcased on the food network because they had put so much thought into the food that they were gonna serve.

So I'm upset to see everyone discussing other things about the programme and not the food......... I'm sorry if I'm making it all worse I'm just trying to understand :confused:
 
Possibly the comments on other aspects of the wedding, besides food, come from Ann's own posts, mentioning how she wishes her intended theme had been more obvious, and how she is unhappy to be known as the chubby orange couple. I think it's perfectly natural for women with an interest in weddings to discuss other aspects of weddings they've seen recently in a TV show, besides just the food. It's all part of the package, when you put your wedding on display on national TV - people are going to discuss ALL aspects of it. And this is the Weddings & Honeymoons board, so there really won't be a group of ladies more interested in discussing weddings, and in particular Disney weddings, than this group. I'm not sure why you find that offensive. :confused: I've seen people share budget information with other brides, to help them get an idea of costs, without anyone else taking offense.
Cheers!
Heather W
 
Well...I haven't seen the program nor have I gone back to read the CB thread...:o(ETA)

But, regarding the issue of sensitivity...I don't care how much they spent on what personally, it's a non-issue in my eyes...but these people put a very personal moment on television. How can they then expect that on a public board like this, people are not going to hash it over the way they might any television show?

Comments were made, I think, long before people had any idea that the couples themselves were on these boards. Until I casually roamed over here...I had no idea myself. And even if the DISers were aware, well, it's the nature of the beast on bulletin boards...maybe it isn't nice, but people do share their unvarnished opinions and, as you said FantasiaSam, they are entitled to do so.

If the couples are offended or needed to make some corrections or whatever , they too were given a chance to post...they too are entitled.

Otherwise...I 'm sorry...I don't know that there were any comments made by anyone that required an apology. If I appeared on a reality-type show...I'd avoid reading the tabloids and any other source where my TV persona might be discussed as much as possible until my 15 minutes were up. (OK, I might peek.:o)
 
OMG discussions about wedding and honeymoons in Disney is what I live for and I am happy to share anything I know about and read every single piece of information.

Yes I do see what some of you are saying to me about everyone taking an interest in other aspects of the show even if it is about food and that's great cos I want to understand and sometimes I need my eyes opened. LOL I guess with me it's always about the food :rolleyes:

So yeah I have finally come to the conclusion on why I was upset - discussion is good but I just hate the thought of any bride seeing criticism about themselves even if they had said it themselves.

To me it's like my family I can slate them and ***** about them because they're MY family but if my husband or friends did I get upset.

I can't change but I appreciate been given the opportunity to thrash it out with fellow DISers.
 
Sam, please don't change the way in which you care about other people's feelings. Sensitivity is an endearing quality that enhances good manners and etiquette. You care about the well being of those around you. I wish more people were like you.

A lot of people here on the CB are jealous of a Disney Wedding. Plain and simple.

I also love reading your restaurant reviews.:p

Lori
 
Sam you are perfect just the way you are!::yes::

Mean people suck and that is all there is to that. The brides on the show were able to live their dream. How awesome is that? Some were more costly than others, true, but it is their money to spend the way they want. And their day to shine and boy did they!

I was fortuante enough to attend the best wedding ever (wasn't it Sam ;)). What an experience! The details were perfect and the Disney magic was everywhere.

If I had to do it over again (and thank goodness I don't) I would love a Disney wedding. Hmmm, maybe a vow renewal for my 25th anniversary in 4 years....:p )
 
Sam,

I think you are fine just the way you are....please don't ever change!

Blessings,

Denise

 
I agree Sam...if I were one of the brides I would have been terribly hurt by the comments....yes you can argue that they put there wedding on display and they should expect it.....but it seemed that comments come from people that didn't know the entire story and made judgements. It is your (or your parents) money you have the right to spend it as you wish..

I'm very thin skinned with certain things....this would have been one of those times..

But if I win the lottery (A girl can dream right?) I'm having a all out no holds barred wing ding in WDW......

:sunny: :sunny:

PS Sam do you have more wedding pics hosted some where that I could peak at...loved to see more.

ZW
 












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