Is this child abuse/neglect and...

[LuvOrlando]

Because I will be required to give my name or it will be considered the same as not reporting it. I've checked. As bad as I feel for this girl, my #1 priority is the safety of my own family. I've seen these people ram their car on purpose into a neighbors car because she didn't like what someone said about her. I've seen them hide in the woods with baseball bats waiting for another neighbor that "dissed" their 12 year old. The victims have refused to call the police because they are afraid. And unfortunately with the housing market the way it is...nobody can just move away.

WOW, if this is how they treat other adults who CAN fend for themselves imagine how they treat their defenseless children. I agree that it is wise to keep your name out of it because they could hurt your own kids, but for your conscience's sake, and that poor child's sake, please do make an anonymous call from a public phone where it can't be traced back to you. You could even buy one of those disposable phone cards with cash at the Dollar Store to use for the purpose.

Here's the thing that bugs me about it. Obviously something is terribly wrong because you are here asking other people about it. If you think the child is in danger it is your moral and ethical duty to report the problem. In your defense, not only would putting your name out there make you a target but it would also give the parents a reason to cut you off and then who would this child have left to be her caregiver, sanctuary and advocate?

A few things that should make you feel better even if nothing comes of this. First, good for you not cutting your kid off from this child. I came from a messed up home and it was the kindness of my friends' parent's that taught me how to be a good mother, I watched and I learned and when it was my turn I modeled my life after friends' families, not my own... the only thing they were good for is showing me the way I DIDN'T want to go. Second, if these people really are a big mess even your smallest kindnesses will stand out for this child and will leave an impression that she will carry with her. Believe me, I remember every small detail of my friend's homes. Third, just knowing that someone somewhere is watching them will give this child some measure of protection. The parents will rant and carry on but ultimately, they do not want to go to jail so they will be cautious and that little worry on the parents minds might be the edge this kid need to make it.

 

[Deb in IA]

Florida law requires EVERY ADULT to be a mandatory reporter.

I'm not so sure.

Here is the actual state statute:

http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemw...e/index.cfm?event=stateStatutes.processSearch

State Statutes Results

Florida
Child Abuse and Neglect
Mandatory Reporters of Child Abuse and Neglect
To better understand this issue and to view it across States, see the Mandatory Reporters of Child Abuse and Neglect: Summary of State Laws (PDF - 633 KB) publication.

Professionals Required to Report
Citation: Ann. Stat. § 39.201

The following persons are mandated reporters:
Physicians, osteopaths, medical examiners, chiropractors, nurses, or hospital personnel
Other health or mental health professionals
Practitioners who rely solely on spiritual means for healing
School teachers or other school officials or personnel
Social workers, daycare center workers, or other professional child care, foster care, residential, or institutional workers
Law enforcement officers or judges


Reporting by Other Persons
Citation: Ann. Stat. § 39.201

Any person who knows or has reasonable cause to suspect that a child is abused, abandoned, or neglected shall report.

Standards for Making a Report
Citation: Ann. Stat. § 39.201

A report is required when:
A person knows or has reasonable cause to suspect that a child is abused, abandoned, or neglected.
A person knows that a child is in need of supervision and care and has no parent, legal custodian, or responsible adult relative immediately known and available to provide supervision and care.


Privileged Communications
Citation: Ann. Stat. § 39.204

Only the attorney-client and clergy-penitent privileges are permitted.

Inclusion of Reporter's Name in Report
Citation: Ann. Stat. § 39.201

Professionals who are mandated reporters are required to provide their names to hotline staff.

Disclosure of Reporter Identity
Citation: Ann. Stat. §§ 39.201; 39.202

The names of reporters shall be entered into the record of the report, but shall be held confidential. The name of the reporter may not be released to any person other than employees of the department responsible for child protective services, the central abuse hotline, law enforcement, the child protection team, or the appropriate State attorney, without the written consent of the person reporting.
This does not prohibit the subpoenaing of a person reporting child abuse, abandonment, or neglect when deemed necessary by the court, the State attorney, or the department, provided the fact that such person made the report is not disclosed.

 

[Mommee]

I'll admit to skipping most of the thread...but if not calling and calling anonymously are treated the same, then call anonymously NOW.
Either way is the same as far as YOU are concerned; but reporting it will help the little girl and not reporting it could harm her.

 

[blanq]

...what would you do?

Sorry, this might be kind of long. First I want to start out by saying I think this is definately neglect (if not abuse) but since I'm close to the situation I want to be sure I'm not just mad at these people.

The child is 5. She is very skinny and sickly looking all the time. She has a chronic cough, black circles under her eyes, bad teeth and an all around unhealthy look. I don't know if she has some sort of health problem because her parents do not take her to the doctors.

Her mom lives in the house about 1/3 of the week. Her dad works long hours. She stays mostly with her 12 year old sister.

There have been MANY times when she comes to my house to play with DD and when it is time for her to go home, there is nobody at her house. The parents ALWAYS blame the 12yo, saying she was supossed to be home. When this happens we usually dress her in DD's clothes and shoes (which are too big) and bring her with us. She is never dressed appropriately for the weather.

On the weekends she eats all of her meals at our house. I honestly don't know if she has dinner on weeknights or not. She lies and is very manipulative, and definately has problems due to her family life.

I also suspect at least the mom of drug use.

I'm pretty sure they have been reported to DCF before, the whole neighborhood apparently pretty much watched because the police escorted the social worker to the house. Not sure who reported, maybe the school. Things got slighty better right after this, but now they are right back to where they were.

I'm a mandatory reporter. But I am VERY afraid to report these parents because they have retaliated against other neighbors for dumb little things with violence and property damage. The victims were afraid to report this to the police.

This might sound bad (selfish), but I'm exhausted from trying to almost raise this little girl. I wanted 1 kid, now it seems like I have 2 (and 1 with big problems). It's affecting the quality of my life with my own family. What would you do?

Yes, I think you have reason to believe that this child is being neglected. As a mandated reporter, I assume you have a legal obligation to report this to Social Services. In my state, mandated reporters are even required to report if the incident is outside the scope of your job. Being afraid is not an excuse to not report, although I totally sympathize with you. I can tell you are a big-hearted person. Neglect is a crime, and children need to be protected, plain and simple. You should talk to Social Services about wanting to remain anonymous, and I would think they could protect your identity by independently verifying the statements you provided in your post hopefully taking you out of the equation.

I am a mandated reporter too and so are my staff. This week I had the unfortunate situation of having an employee have to report possible neglect of a 5 month old baby and unfortunately, because of the situation, there is no way to protect my employees identity. Yesterday, the mother of the 5 month old who she reported called and left a scathingly nasty message on my employees voicemail. This is an icky situation and we will move to obtaining a restraining order if the harrassment continues. My employee was concerned about backlash relating to her reporting the incident but she knows the law requires she report it and I am supporting her for doing the right thing.

 

[blanq]

Thats not really true, some 12 year oldsare mature enough and old enough to care for a sibling. I have a 12 year old and while she isn't responsible for my younger dses more of the time I am, i have counted on her for help, and its a far cry from neglectful and dangerous. In the situation with the OP, it sounds like there are other things going on as well, however I just wanted to say that in different situations there is absolutely nothing wrong with a 12 year old taking care of a younger sibling or a parent relying on that kind of help.

This is true. When I was 12 years old I babysat for a family with 6 children (and a dog) fulltime for a summer. I was responsible enough to handle this situation. Most 12 year olds can handle responsibility for caring for younger siblings. Each state has guidelines or laws about this and they cover various age groups and how long they can be left alone during the day or overnight.

In the instance of the situation that prompted this post, the 12 year old clearly cannot be relied upon and is not responsible, and the parents are not doing their due diligence to ensure the 5 year old is cared for.

 

[tmarquez]

OP here agin with an update.

When I got home from work today, the WHOLE FAMILY was waiting for me outside. They came over and said that they wanted to let me know that DCF had talked to the kids at school today and talked to the mom and that they were coming back tonight to talk to the dad and us.

She unfortunately thinks it was another neighbor that reported (because that is a neighbor that most recently had a run in with them - they slashed the neighbors tires). She knew all the details of the report, so either the caseworker told her or her questions were very specific.

Anyway, the 5yo hasn't said anything to me (she's been at my house since I got home) but the questioning has affected her, as she is very clingy which is totally out of character for her.

The 12yo wanted to tell me all about what happened at school, but the mom sent her back to her house. The mom told me that the caseworker laughed and said the report was a joke (I hope this isn't true!). The mom also said she'd be gone for about 2 weeks...ok.

I'm not sure if I'm comfortable telling the caseworker I made the report, since the mom knew so many details. I can't afford 4 new tires right now.

Another update. As I was writing the worker came to the door. I didn't tell her I was the reporter, but answered the questions I felt comfortable with and told her that due to the crazy situation with the neighbors I wasn't comfortable with talking.

The caseworker said that they see alot of things they don;t agree with in their cases, but unfortunately these things aren't illegal...I took that as a clue on this case.

Also when the 5yo saw her she said, "I know her!". And told us that she was at her house and school today and at her house a long time ago too and they were friends.

 

[hereyago]

Did the caseworker give you a card so you could talk at a later time?


Yes I would imagine the Caseworker told her the details of the report, because they have to tell what the accusations are.

 

[happygirl]

Did the caseworker give you a card so you could talk at a later time?


Yes I would imagine the Caseworker told her the details of the report, because they have to tell what the accusations are.

Yes, the family in question gets a copy of the report as well.

 

[tmarquez]

Did the caseworker give you a card so you could talk at a later time?


Yes I would imagine the Caseworker told her the details of the report, because they have to tell what the accusations are.

Yes, she gave me her card and told me to call her anytime.

 

[tmarquez]

Yes, the family in question gets a copy of the report as well.

I was told that the report was confidential and did not go to the family.

 

[happygirl]

Yes, she gave me her card and told me to call her anytime.

Hopefully they will do something. I wonder why the mom is leaving for two weeks I under if it has anything to do with the report

 

[happygirl]

I was told that the report was confidential and did not go to the family.

I don't think that is true. When my brother and siser in law had problems they got a copy of the report. It didn't have anyone name on it. just what was called in

 

[tmarquez]

Hopefully they will do something. I wonder why the mom is leaving for two weeks I under if it has anything to do with the report

No she always leaves like that. It's just crazy to me because if DCF came to my door about my DD...I would cancel any travel plans I had until I knew what was going on (innocent or not).

 

[happygirl]

No she always leaves like that. It's just crazy to me because if DCF came to my door about my DD...I would cancel any travel plans I had until I knew what was going on (innocent or not).

Me to, It crazy how people think

 

[daisy2]

I would call but I would also maybe go to the police station and tell them your situation. This little girl and even the 12 year old should be in this bad condition. I know in California even if you suspect it you can call in an annonimously( sorry can't spell) to have them check it out.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

Not every adult in FL is a mandatory reporter.

Absolutely wrong. According to FS and presented by EVERY APS trainer I've ever listened to EVERY ADULT is a mandatory reporter in FL. I don't care what your "boss" says, s/he's wrong if s/he says that is not true.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

Any person who knows or has reasonable cause to suspect that a child is abused, abandoned, or neglected shall report

Shall means will. There are mandated reporters who, if they fail to report will face stronger repercussions, but all adults are required.

DCF tries to give their employees leeway by saying they only are mandated to report if they witness the abuse, neglect, or exploitation in the course of their work. That's not complete.

I've worked for DCF, and I fully understand their so called logic. However, that does NOT remove the responsibility from every adult for reporting THE SUSPICION of ANE.

There really are no excuses. Either you report it or you don't. You live with your choices. Period.

 

[karibritt01]

Yes, the family in question gets a copy of the report as well.

I was told that the report was confidential and did not go to the family.

I believe that the family gets a copy of the social workers report, but not of the actual complaint. The case worker will write down the accusations, their findings, and interventions or follow-up if it is required, but not have any info about the reporter on that report.

 

[Deb in IA]

tmarquez, what has happened to the little girl?

 

[Deb in IA]

sigh.

I hope she is OK.