Is there any justification for "We really need this vacation!"

[Gumbo4x4]

Oddly enough, Disney might just be one of those trips for us. My kids are getting older and it will only be "magic" for so long.

 

[Claire&TheBoys]

Yes, there are instances where I'd incur debt to go on vacation. Just recently, my husband said he'd gotten a call from his commanding colonel and he was on a "possible" list to deploy, even though he just got back from a year-long deployment less than 13 months ago. Chances were small that he'd get the call, but if he were going to have to leave for a year, yep, I'd notify the teachers and book a vacation the same day. Now, we do have the money to cover a vacation, but even if we didn't, I'd book it without a second thought. Fortunately, someone else higher up the list is going, so he didn't get tagged, but that kind of scenario is always in the back of my mind.

 

[Colleen27]

Absolutely there are times when I would consider it justifiable. There were a lot of other places we could have spent the money we dropped on our '08 trip - a new roof, paying down the mortgage, saving for the looming need to replace the van I was driving at the time - but frankly we needed that trip more. '07 was a terrible year for us and that summer/fall had us on the brink of throwing in the towel at times, and that trip - from the planning/dreaming to the actual travel - was all about putting it behind us. Even if we'd had to put some of it on a CC I think we'd have done it because that emotional break was so important at that point in time.

I think a big red flag comes in if the marital problems are rooted in money problems, though, because adding to those problems for a temporary reprieve/escape is only making the underlying issue worse in the long run. It is one thing to "run away" from difficulties trying to conceive, health issues, and other "no one's fault" issues that no amount of money could fix, and quite another to spend money trying to "run away" from financial stress.

 

[ashmarie06]

I work hard all year. Every may I have 120 hours of vacation that rolls over. By that point I NEED a vacation. I justify it, by paying disney a set amount every pay check, to pay off my trip. I then Cash in the 40 hours of vacation to cover the week i'm taking off of work. I cash in another 65 hours for just cash. To cover any other expenses of my vacation. I also stay in value resorts, and drive to Disney. Even though the DDP may not be a better value for some, it is for us so that we can have that budgeted. I limit myself to one Souvenier each trip, and my parents pre-pay my photopass CD for my birthday present.

I think if you can justify your vacation, and your not going into debt by going on it. Then go for it.

I imagine things may change when I have kids, but i'd still do what I can to give my children the same experences that I get.

 

[eliza61]

It's easy to say something like, "No one ever needs a vacation," and that's fair (and sensible).

I've been thinking about it because recently a friend told me they are going on a vacation even though they can in no way afford it. Her reason, their marriage in on the rocks and she feels they "need" this vacation to help save their relationship. I get that this might not fly for some people, but I do have some sympathy for her situation. When you've been dealing with life and it's been really hard, sometimes it does feel like you need a break just to keep going, even if it isn't a very smart financial choice.

For me, when my mom was dying, we took her on a vacation that I couldn't at all afford. The whole thing went on credit. The bills are long paid off, but I don't regret a cent of that trip.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to get to is: Is there any reason you would consider valid for taking a trip you couldn't afford?

Yes and no!! LOL. that's me, so decisive. I've been trying very hard to moving away from absolutes. One thing I've learned is that I've made boat loads of finanical and life mistakes, I've had regrets and stuff I've been happy about.

Anyhoo, like you I also took a once in a life trip that I couldn't afford at the time. Do I regre it? Not in the least, it was an amazing vacation but I'm also saying this now. I did not save money until my late 30's, I didn't go into debt but my dh and I definitely spent what we earned. Once again do I regret it? probably not, we've had some extraordinary experiences that will last me a life time but now I'm probably paying for it.

When your world is upside down (from a divorce, death etc) normal rules really don't apply. I don't find it strange that some one trying to save their marriage would go into debt to do it.

Now that I get older and so many of the people I love are dying, I do worry less and less about having X amount of money in the bank. My children are getting older so there are days when I say maybe I should drop a couple of grand and take the kids to Europe.

So yes, I think there probably are times when I would go into debt for a vacation. financially would it be the smart thing? probably not but I don't measure my life by only dollars and cents.

 

[Maggie Lizer]

Depends on what you call a vacation too.

-If I'm using something like Skyauction to hit the beach offseason or a mountain resort for $300 a week with a stop at Kroger for food on the way in, then yes.

-If I'm buying premium passes for Disney, taking tours, and staying at the Grand Floridian, then no.

I agree with this 100%. My husband and I went on an expensive vacation last year, and I know I will "need" a vacation this year for my sanity (all work and no play makes Maggie CRAZY), but rather than rack up cc debt or feel like I am spending my emergency reserves, we'll do a cheaper road trip to PA and do some hilking and free sightseeing as at least part of our amusement.

 

[ssawka]

Will one vacation save a marriage? Probably not, but if they had been taking vacations all along, that may have helped. Without details on why the couple is having trouble, none of us can say for sure, but if the issue was not spending enough quality time with each other to foster the marriage, then vacations may have helped.

It's all about priorities! For us, vacations are very important! I am willing to skimp and save throughout the year in order to guarantee our vacations.

Now, that does not mean that a vacation has to be expensive. When I was growing up, my parents made sure that we had a vacation every single year. Even if it was just going someplace local and staying over for a few nights.

Where I grew up, I remember there was a commercial for a local travel agency (remember them?) that talked about kids growing up and what they would remember. The premise was that they would remember the vacations much more than day-to-day life. And you know, now that I'm older I totally understand what the commercial was talking about. Some of my earliest memories are of the whole family going to Disney World when I was four.

 

[Ginny Favers]

I think there is. We went three years ago, right after I'd been laid off from my job. I knew lean times were coming and yes it would be prudent to save the money for what might lie ahead, but I also knew that my daughter would only be the perfect age for Disney for so long.

You only live once. I didn't want to keep waiting for the perfect time and realize that it had passed me by. My parents did that, always trying to save for uncertainty, and I never did ANYTHING or went anywhere while they amassed a small fortune they'll never be able to spend in a lifetime. I didn't want to do that. It was the best decision we ever made. Three years, and my daughter still talks about that trip as if it were yesterday.

Sometimes, memories of good times are what propel you through the difficult ones. That's what it did for us. And it took awhile, but now we are financially secure again.

 

[Lucky4me]

Yes I think there are times a vacation is justifiable when the cash isn't really there up front.
Not sure it will save a marriage though, because they will have to come home and face their reality.

We need a new roof- $5,000. We're getting back $4,000 in tax return. I want to patch the roof and not get a new one for a couple more years and go on vacation instead. I think it's justifiable because dh had brain cancer and is remission, but it may be temporary.
So that's my justification. Not sure if we'll go or replace the roof, but if we do go, I won't feel guilty about it.

 

[julirina]

Is there any justification for "We really need this vacation!"

Simple answer is NO. But, I do believe there are moments when " I want this vacation ( memory) and am willing to deal with the consquences of this decision"

This! We need food and water, we need shelter, we need oxygen. We want many, many, many other things and we call them needs, but really they're just wants.

That said, we took our big family WDW trip in 2008 when my dad was sick and the future was uncertain. He's gone now, those memories are priceless, and I wouldn't change them for anything. But we didn't need the trip. We were fortunate at that time that the federal economic stimulus helped us (and my sisters' families) pay for the trip, but if faced with a similar situation, I would most likely do it again and incur debt for it if necessary. Like the PP said, ultimately it comes down to facing the financial consequences of that decision, which may be long-lasting. But please don't call it a need -- it jades people to the real meaning of the word, and trivializes the true needs (for food, clean water, a safe place to live, protection from abuse of all kinds) that so many around our world are facing every day. Sorry to be a party-pooper, but this really bugs me. <climbs down from soapbox, takes off preacher's clothes and puts mouse ears and happy face back on>

 

[marie1203]

I think there are circumstances were I will just take the vacation regardless if I could afford it or not. If I had a sick family member I would do it in a minute. I had a friend that went in debt to take her kids to WDW before her DH deployed, if I had kids I probably would have done the same.
To save a marriage perhaps if I really think that is the solution but I don't think just a vacation will save a marriage unless is to those places that are for couples to work on the marriage.

 

[livvylivvie]

This! We need food and water, we need shelter, we need oxygen. We want many, many, many other things and we call them needs, but really they're just wants.

But please don't call it a need -- it jades people to the real meaning of the word, and trivializes the true needs (for food, clean water, a safe place to live, protection from abuse of all kinds) that so many around our world are facing every day. Sorry to be a party-pooper, but this really bugs me. <climbs down from soapbox, takes off preacher's clothes and puts mouse ears and happy face back on>

Loved this post! It Put things in perspective!
The Last sentence Cracked me up!! Love it!!

I also agree that under certain Circumstances I would deffinately be willing to go into debt for a family VaCa. (Sick Family Member)
I Also Think Family Vacations are Very important for families to take. Even if it is just Camping, or short trips. Those are some of the fondest Memories of my Childhood. My parents saved all year so we could go on a Vacation to Florida. We stayed in a cute little Motel, (sameone each year). We Drove the 24 hours to Florida. Ate in our Kitchenette. and Those memories have lasted my whole life. I hope to give my kids some good Memories too.

 

[Marionnette]

 

[beansmom]

well, i'm not as 'money smart' as lots of you (i leave that to DH) but what i do know is life is short...and in these uncertain times (like when have there ever been 'certain' times??) I don't regret spending money to make lifetime memories.

My dad spoke of going to epcot for a few years before his retirement. Well, the SUMMER before he was to retire, he was diagnosed with inoperable colon cancer and was dead within 3 months.

This past summer, my dear friend sat right in my living room and had a stroke...just as pretty as you please. Thank goodness, dh was here to 'save' her and she's sorta ok today but her life is altered and she cannot ever travel overseas.

A friend of a friend lost her dh last week in a car accident.

Life is short and uncertain...I fully intend to make hay while the sun shines and worry about the ants later.

 

[elaine amj]

In spending money, there is always a choice. You have what you make and you have to figure out how to make it cover all your wants and needs.

For our family, we treasure our vacations. Last year we took a LOT of weekend trips - we were away pretty much every other weekend. It was a really precious time for us and forced us to spend time together, which we needed. I find if we just stay home, we end up doing our own stuff and only spending a little time together, kwim?

That said, if money was an issue - I wouldn't have done it. I would have forced us to spend time together doing free things in our area. We CAN still connect and have fun together WITHOUT going away to somewhere expensive, kwim? Memories can be made anywhere.

So, no - in most cases I don't see why you have to go into debt for an expensive vacation to "reconnect". Now in the case of fulfilling a dying family members' dream trip - then yes, I would. Otherwise, an affordable low cost vacation somewhere nearby can also be really fun. It just takes a little more effort and a little more creativity.

 

[sydneysmom]

I think I'm in the minority here, but unless the person owes me money, I figure how they choose to spend their money is their own business. Who's to decide "what's justified and what isn't"? They're adults and probably know their finances better than anyone....and if they feel like they need to spend the money, who cares? They're the ones who have to deal with that later. Personally, I wouldn't want anyone deciding that what I've spent my money on isn't justified. But, that's just my opinion. Let them go on vacation and try to have some fun. YOu never know the stress that's behind someone's closed doors...and if they think that a vacation might help them, then good luck to them for wanting to try.

 

[North of Mouse]

If one vacation could "fix" a marriage, it wasn't "broke" to begin with. We all have our "little bumps" in life and getting away from our normal lives is a plus for everybody, but you DO have to go back to those same places with the same stresses and people you left (yourselves included). We have always taken annual vacations with our children, but they were within our "very limited" means - camping trips to mountains where we cooked and did a lot of hiking, but we and our children loved them and it was very relaxing, and they were in our budget.

 

[nansmama]

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[DawnM]

Nope. There is never a reason to go on vacation without being able to afford it.

When does it end? Vacation, new car, new computer, new clothing......

Going to visit sick family doesn't equal a vacation to me, so I am not even putting that in the same category.

Dawn

 

[Bonniec]

If one vacation could "fix" a marriage, it wasn't "broke" to begin with. We all have our "little bumps" in life and getting away from our normal lives is a plus for everybody, but you DO have to go back to those same places with the same stresses and people you left (yourselves included).

This is interesting to me. About 8 years ago my marriage was on the rocks. We were moving to another state and everything was just a mess. We ended up driving across the country and took almost 2 weeks to do it. I guess you could count that as a vacation since we took extra routes to go and see things. I will say that the extra time together did save our marriage. We've been married almost 14 years now and are very happy.

But as you said, maybe our marriage wasn't actually broke and it was just one of those bumps. I was in a state of not knowing how I felt and the time together really helped.

So I could understand why someone would feel like they needed a vacation to save their marriage I guess. But there's a big difference between needing extra time together to reconnect verses someting truely broken.