Is it weird my son wants to do BBB as a princess?

[Rip]

Really? The evening gown reference is a little extreame no?

Children should be allowed to be who they are. Why should they have to follow "norms of society" if they live outside of that?

Wearing muddy jeans to a wedding is inappropriate...Not identifying with one's physical gender and dressing to suit themselves is not. (Unless they are instisting on wearing mini-skirts and belly shirts to church)

Just be aware that there are consequences for refusing to follow societal norms. Now, this kid is 4, so no big. If he's 14 and walking around decked out like a princess, he will be mocked. That's just a fact, if you're going to intentionally draw attention to yourself in such a fashion then you'd better be ready to deal with the consequences. Doesn't make it morally right, but it's still reality. So if you're going to raise your children to "be whomever they want to be", they need to realize that if they show up to their first job interview in something society considers abnormal or outlandish, they'll likely be living in your basement for quite some time.

Myself, I have tattoos, but I won't get any that aren't covered by work attire even though I'd love to simply because it would make some of my patients very uncomfortable and probably cause me to lose business.

 

[perfectparanoia]

I saw a little boy at the parks who had BBB and was Tinkerbell. I thought it was adorable.

YMMV.

 

[Rip]

Except this isn't "in public" it's at Disney which is private property

It's not normally acceptable for people to dress like this in "real life" but it happens at Disney all the time- because it's a vacation destination where you are able to suspend your believe in reality and just live in the magic that a wonderful man named Walter Elias Disney created for generations of people to enjoy.

You're arguing semantics with respect to "public". In actuality it is most definitely "in public". Many things that occur "in public" are technically on private property - but it is private property that is open to the general public.

 

[Sammie]

Sorry but I think it's weird to ask this on a public forum. I would never let total strangers influence how I deal with my children.

I am all for asking what are the best restaurants, and where should we stand to see the parade but questions about decisions for my family stay in the family.

Just my opinion.

 

[KellyNY]

Except this isn't "in public" it's at Disney which is private property

"In public" means "not in private of your own home", so while it is private property, it is a public place.


It's not normally acceptable for people to dress like this in "real life" but it happens at Disney all the time- because it's a vacation destination where you are able to suspend your believe in reality and just live in the magic that a wonderful man named Walter Elias Disney created for generations of people to enjoy.

And people get looks all the time as well, while it is a magical place, it is not "magical place" where everyone is kind and sweet and unicorns are chased by fairies.

.

 

[nytimez]

Sorry but I think it's weird to ask this on a public forum. I would never let total strangers influence how I deal with my children.

I am all for asking what are the best restaurants, and where should we stand to see the parade but questions about decisions for my family stay in the family.

Just my opinion.

Congratulations!

 

[greenkai3000]

When we were at MK a month ago we saw a little girl who had been to BBB and dressed up as a princess. And there was her brother, probably about 3, dressed up as Tinkerbell. There were in line ahead of us. I told them BOTH how great they looked and the little boy looked as happy as could be. I also told their mother how great I thought it was that she let him choose what would make him happy that day. She said that he had his heart set on being Tinkerbell and I thought it was fantastic that she didn't let society's preconceived notions about what is gender-appropriate put a damper on his innocent wish. The important thing was that he was happy that day and felt special, as every child should at Disney.

...is best response ever, in my opinion. Let your son dress up like Cinderella if he wants to. If anyone, kid or adult, teases , or makes fun of him that's their issue, and not yours or your kid. Enjoy your trip to Disney the way it's supposed to be...magical. Don't let anyone else make it feel otherwise.

 

[fairestoneofall]

first, is his hair long enough for BBB?

second, i wouldn't do it. i don't have a problem with anyone else doing it but i wouldn't. at age almost-seven, my DS would now be horrified if we had pictures of him dressed as Cinderella. and i cannot imagine how he'd feel as a teenager. to spare him that, i wouldn't do it.

i don't think, at age four, that he is making any kind of statement about his sexuality. i think it's perfectly normal that he wants to dress like a girl. however, i'd want to spare him embarrassment both now and later. i think he's still a little too young to fully grasp societal norms and why people would possibly make fun of him. i would want to protect him from that right now. if he chooses it at an older age or as an adult, then that's up to him. but for now, i would want to protect him. but that's just me.

 

[FireDancer]

You're arguing semantics with respect to "public". In actuality it is most definitely "in public". Many things that occur "in public" are technically on private property - but it is private property that is open to the general public.

Exactly. You don't have an expectation of privacy for example while you are standing on Main Street USA.

In public isn't the same as publicly owned property. These boards are privately owned but we are posting on what is a public message board.

Ownership and audience aren't always the same.

 

[Glennie5]

I can almost guarantee you that your son won't be the first boy to visit BBB for a princess makeover. Ultimately you are the one who will be paying for the BBB so if you are comfortable with it go and enjoy the experience. Your son will only be 4 once - let him enjoy being 4.

 

[YourMajesty]

So, my 4 year old wants to do BBB and dress up as Cinderella. I have offered Prince Charming or another character costume but he keeps saying he wants to be Cinderella. He has done the Pirate League 2x this past year and doesn't want to do it again. Has anyone else had this experience with their little boys? I am an open minded mom and would possibly let him but I don't want him to be made fun of. I know, I would be taking my chances-lol. Help!

I hope I didn't miss this question to the original OP. How does a 4 year old even know about BBB? Does he have sisters?

 

[Magpie]

I saw a little boy at the parks who had BBB and was Tinkerbell. I thought it was adorable.

YMMV.

I wonder if that was the same little fellow MommyRobin saw about a month ago? Or if Tinkerbell is especially popular with the boys?

Also... did you happen to notice anyone throwing tomatoes (literal or metaphorical)?

 

[carrie1626]

to original poster:

if you're comfortable with this at 4 yrs
will you still still be at 6, 8, and 16?

If you were ok with this, I don't think you would have asked.

to the rest of the public, yes we'll look, most will smile, laugh and think its cute

 

[deegack]

I hope I didn't miss this question to the original OP. How does a 4 year old even know about BBB? Does he have sisters?

Any number of ways including the Disney planning DVD.

 

[stargazertechie]

to original poster:

if you're comfortable with this at 4 yrs
will you still still be at 6, 8, and 16?

If you were ok with this, I don't think you would have asked.

to the rest of the public, yes we'll look, most will smile, laugh and think its cute

But there's a difference between a 4 year old and a 16 year old.


It's ok for young children to run around wearing nothing but their birthday suit at the beach, but that's not acceptable for older children.

It's ok for a 4 year old boy to go to the ladies' room with his mother, but it's NOT ok for a 16 year old young man to go to the ladies' room.

It's OK for a 16 year old to drive a car, but not a 4 year old.

Get the picture?

 

[carrie1626]

But there's a difference between a 4 year old and a 16 year old.


It's ok for young children to run around wearing nothing but their birthday suit at the beach, but that's not acceptable for older children.

It's ok for a 4 year old boy to go to the ladies' room with his mother, but it's NOT ok for a 16 year old young man to go to the ladies' room.

It's OK for a 16 year old to drive a car, but not a 4 year old.

Get the picture?

oh i get the picture alright
but
if that mom is ok with it at 4, then she best prepare herself when her son at 6, 8, and 16 wants to know why she doesn't accept his ways then.
I gave her a ? to think about! If she was really Ok with it why ask us................. she wanted feedback of what the public here on the boards thought

I get the picture!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[nytimez]

oh i get the picture alright
but
if that mom is ok with it at 4, then she best prepare herself when her son at 6, 8, and 16 wants to know why she doesn't accept his ways then
. I gave her a ? to think about! If she was really Ok with it why ask us................. she wanted feedback of what the public here on the boards thought

I get the picture!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

?

 

[stargazertechie]

oh i get the picture alright
but
if that mom is ok with it at 4, then she best prepare herself when her son at 6, 8, and 16 wants to know why she doesn't accept his ways then
. I gave her a ? to think about! If she was really Ok with it why ask us................. she wanted feedback of what the public here on the boards thought

I get the picture!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Kids will be strange, regardless.

I'm a PRIME example of this, LOL. I went to college, and decided it was high time to "find myself".

Before I found myself:

After I found myself:

I came to my senses after about 6 months. I'm sure my parents weren't thrilled with my fashion/beauty choices, but they never once told me that I was being ridiculous. I came to that conclusion myself

 

[carrie1626]

Just be aware that there are consequences for refusing to follow societal norms. Now, this kid is 4, so no big. If he's 14 and walking around decked out like a princess, he will be mocked. That's just a fact, if you're going to intentionally draw attention to yourself in such a fashion then you'd better be ready to deal with the consequences. Doesn't make it morally right, but it's still reality. So if you're going to raise your children to "be whomever they want to be", they need to realize that if they show up to their first job interview in something society considers abnormal or outlandish, they'll likely be living in your basement for quite some time.

Myself, I have tattoos, but I won't get any that aren't covered by work attire even though I'd love to simply because it would make some of my patients very uncomfortable and probably cause me to lose business.

very well said!

 

[mesaboy2]

There's lots of people at Disney who don't realize exactly who they're looking at.

Just sayin'.