Is it rude to ask people to remove their.....

We usually take our shoes off at the door- and have a mat where there is usually a "pile" of shoes. Most of my kids' friends take their shoes off when they come in, as do our adulty friends. When hosting a party, etc., people often do spontaneously take off their shoes (probably cued by the pile). If they don't- I don't ask. If they ask, my response is to do whatever they are most comfortable doing. When I am hosting friends, I want them to feel at ease and not worry that they should have put on better socks or that their feet stink (although with two black labs in the house we can always blame bad smells on them!). Floors can be washed, but friendships are less easily repaired. Besides- I have four kids to help me wash floors, and with 2 large dogs, 4 kids, a husband and a MIL all living with me vacuuming and washing floors (and walls and dishes and clothes and.....) is never ending!!!!
 
Originally posted by KathyTX
Am I the only one who would find this odd and rude?

When I get dressed, I expect to stay dressed. If you want me to take off my shoes when I come to your house, I think you need to call and inform me of this dress code so I'll be prepared...

I might not want to walk around in stocking feet and ruin my good socks. I might be wearing hosiery that would be ruined this way. I might not feel comfortable showing strangers my naked feet.

I would be pretty taken aback to be asked to remove my shoes in your home unexpectedly.

Floors are meant to be walked on!

ITA Kathy. I find it extremely rude. Once, someone asked me to remove my shoes when I went to a party at their house. I left. I didn't get all dressed up in a new outfit to have to remove my shoes.
 
Although I always walk around my house barefoot or in slippers, I would NEVER ask a guest to remove their shoes. The comfort of my guests is ALWAYS more important than the condition of my floor, if it gets dirty I'll clean it......
 
Maybe, just maybe I would ask them to take their shoes off if their shoes is really muddy or very wet. It's winter and there's snow and it's wet out there. And sometimes by wiping their shoes on the mat doesn't get the dirty wet mud off.

We don't want to be rude as a host...and we don't want the guest to be rude too if they know that their shoes are really muddy wet and then they walk on the white carpet. That is not nice either. They should have some respect for someone's home.

It should be common courtesy in both parties. That's what I think.
 

Originally posted by KathyTX
Am I the only one who would find this odd and rude?

When I get dressed, I expect to stay dressed. If you want me to take off my shoes when I come to your house, I think you need to call and inform me of this dress code so I'll be prepared...

!


No you are not the only one! I would never ever ask someone to remove their shoes in my house nor would I ever remove mine in someone elses either....I am the first to admit my feet stink LOL...I wear sneakers with no socks since I hate the feeling of socks and if I take my stinky sneakers off then my stinky feet are going to be walking all over someones carpet smelling it up LOL....but seriously I would never ever ask someone to take their shoes off, even after getting all our hardwood floors done I never asked anyone to do that.
 
I have never heard of such a thing!!! Of course, my family has always had dogs, so pristine floors were never a part of my life. I'm also of the school that believes that things are meant to be used and enjoyed and replaced when necessary; not a big fan of the whole "plastic-covered furniture" way of life.

If it were anyone but a close friend, I would leave.

And to have a party and ask everyone to take their shoes off? Not just rude, but a little bit trashy, IMO. All that so they don't have to get the carpet cleaned afterwards? I wonder how many people go out of their way to buy new shoes for these parties just so they can leave them at the door.

oh... and remember when it was trendy to wear keds with no socks? well let me tell you my stinky keds (that i wore every day) would have knocked you out!!! i remember someone in school teasing with me by stealing my shoes off of my feet, and i was mortified! you do NOT want that smell on your carpet!!
 
Yes it's rude!


If it was raining, or muddy....I can totally see that. But even still, I'd only say something like, "make sure you wipe your feet really good, I wouldn't want you to slip."

I just cannot imagine asking a GUEST in my home whether it be family, friend, or foe to take off their shoes just because I was anal about my carpet. It's just dirt. It can be cleaned.
 
/
would it be rude, if after taking shoes off you ask them to put them back on because there feet stink
 
I personally absolutely hate for my feet to be cold. It makes me miserable. If I know ahead of time about the no shoes rule it won't bother me at all because I'll be sure and bring a thick pair of socks with me but if I don't have that with me and they ask me at the door I would probably comply and then shorten my stay to just a few minutes. And I would think it was inconsiderate of my hosts not to have warned me of this ahead of time.
 
I know when I go to a party, I put together a whole outfit. That includes shoes. If I am wearing boots, I might not put socks on that match. If I got to a party and I was asked to remove my shoes, I would be so embarassed!

I do think it's rude not to inform ahead of time. Walking around in stocking feet might be embarrassing to some people. and they might choose not to come. At least give them the choice.
 
I get on some of my family for this...
If it has rained or snowed and I have taken my shoes off and they haven't, then my socks get wet...:mad:
But then I guess if I know they're coming over I'll keep mine on....
Live & Learn... :o
 
I'll remove my shoes on my own if it is muddy, wet or snowy outside. Otherwise, I'm coming in with my shoes on. If asked, I take them off, but probably won't return to that house. One of my cousins had the "take your shoes off" rule in her new house until her husband's friend took off his sweaty sneakers to reveal the stench of some pretty smelly feet. Yuck! I'd rather have shoeprints on my carpet.
 
I agree - tell them ahead of time. 13 years ago before my wedding I was given a bridal shower by a coworker whose home I had never been too. I guess I should have known since she is of Japanese descent - but guess who wore a pair of dress boots with holey socks underneath to her shower? I had dressed nicely, but had stinky holey kneesocks on! :o I didn't think it was rude because I figured it was a cultural thing.

I don't want to take my shoes off and I also don't want people taking them off at my house unless they are muddy or settling in for an extended visit. I don't like the pile of shoes by the door or people's stinky feet on my carpet. So my question is - would it be rude for me to ask my guests to please keep their shoes on?

PS - I have bad ankles and have been told by my doctor to always wear shoes! I do take them off when asked though.
 
I have never been asked to remove my shoes when I visit someone so I'm not sure how I would react. I guess it would depend on how close to the hosts I am. If I didn't know them well, it would seem very rude if they asked me to remove my shoes.
 
I think it's rude to ask guest to remove their shoes (kids are an exception; they jump into every mud hole!).

I prefer my adult guests to leave their shoes on (if they are clean, of course! I have no objection to them removing muddy ones). I hate tripping over the huge pile of shoes that we have no place to put. And some of my husband's family members have awful foot odor! Then there are the days guests just pop in and my floor has is covered with dog hair and dirt the kids tracked in... I would be soooo embarassed if their socks got dirty!:o
 
I don't think it rude................we don't remove shoes for our place but our neighbours do & so do some relatives...........

You go with the flow;)
 
I think it is very rude to ask people to remove there shoes. My mother-in-law used to do that and it drove me crazy. Don't have people to your house if your going to be so anal about your floors.

After a while I refused to do it and they never said anything to me.
I'm just not comfortable walking around someones house without me shoes on.
 
I do find it rude unless it is snow or muddy,in which case most people will take them off.I wont take mine off when just running in .If i notice the host has hers off then i will remove mine.At my
house i want my friends to be comfortable and do what they want.I had some friends over for the first time last week they loved the comfortable feel of my home,and they mentioned how nice it was not to be asked to remove their shoes.when you are a guest in my home my job is to make you welcome and comfortable and not worry about what i may have to clean later.
 
I don't ask people to remove their shoes in my house, I have done it when asked to at toher peoples, but am not always comfortable, I hate to have cold feet! DS's have a friend who comes over and always takes his shoes off (never asked him to) and his feet smell SOOOO bad, I can't even stay in the same room as them, now I always say "It's OK, you don't hve to take your shoes off"

One thought regarding your father in law, you said he had a stroke, It might not be safe for hime to walk around in stocking feet, it is much easier to slip and fall. I am a physical therapist assistant and when I worked in a local hospital we NEVER let a patient we were walking wear only socks or even open back slippers. If they didn't have shoes we walked them barefoot and made sure we called a family member to bring in safe shoes. He may even be wearing a foot drop brace that is not noticable with shoes and clothes on and may not be able to walk without it.
 
Umm... Ever heard of a door mat? We have two. One outside and one inside.

I don't think it's rude but it will make some people uncomfortable especially if they are self-conscious about the condition of their socks or the smell of their feet.

And the idea of wearing slippers that have been worn by who-knows-who doesn't get me very excited either.


But unless someone's shoes are encrusted in mud or snow, they can leave their shoes on or take them off. I don't really care.
 













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