Is it possible

[happygirl]

You come off from your posts as a helicopter parent - I thought you were laughing at someone being overprotective .... therefore you were mocking yourself too - pot calling the kettle black.

Nope. Just thought it was a cute photo

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

i don't think reporting her would do anything, unless she's actually bullying her on there. throwing around a swear word or two isn't a big deal, but if they start really harrassing her then i could understand reporting her.

 

[Ceila]

Yup

Wow. I can't believe you think what you have done is an appropriate way to handle this situation, and you seem so smug about it with the response I quoted above.

Granted, I wouldn't be happy if some kid said that to my daughter, but the fact is that the other girl did nothing against FB TOS, while you are breaking one if not two of them: you must be at least 13 and you must not provide false personal information (i.e., if you or your DD lied about her age to get her an account).

I would NOT take kindly to another parent initiating contact with my child through FB, whether to take on an inappropriate comment by them or otherwise. Reprimanding that child is NOT your job. If you felt so strongly about contacting someone, it should have been that child's parents, NOT the child.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

Wow. I can't believe you think what you have done is an appropriate way to handle this situation, and you seem so smug about it with the response I quoted above.

Granted, I wouldn't be happy if some kid said that to my daughter, but the fact is that the other girl did nothing against FB TOS, while you are breaking one if not two of them: you must be at least 13 and you must not provide false personal information (i.e., if you or your DD lied about her age to get her an account).

I would NOT take kindly to another parent initiating contact with my child through FB, whether to take on an inappropriate comment by them or otherwise. Reprimanding that child is NOT your job. If you felt so strongly about contacting someone, it should have been that child's parents, NOT the child.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

To report a " friend " of my daughter's to the PTB at Facebook? My daughter expressed a negative opinion - no profanity, she knows better - about the Jonas Bros and this girl responded with the worst profanity, starting with an 'F', directed TO my daughter.

I asked my daughter who this girl was, and she said that she's in a different grade and that they're not friends in real life. This was one of those " friend of a friend " things. I told my dd12 that I want her to report her and delete her as a friend.

I will be happy to take the heat for reporting her, but I can't figure out how.

I plan to use this as a teachable moment with both daughters as to who to accept as a friend.

You say the girl is in another grade, so most likely at least 13 and legally allowed to be on Facebook.

What teaching moment did you exactly use with your daughter? That it is perfectly ok for her to break the rules, but somebody who hasn't done anything against the rules has to be reported because her feelings were hurt?

Well, googling didn't help much. Found a lot of info about child predators and terroristic threats though.

I sent the girl a message telling her to unfriend my daughter as she will be doing so when dd gets home from school.

All she said was " I hate the JB" , expressing her opinion. Doesn't call for fer "friend" to f-u in response.

Are you the self-appointed profanity police for Facebook? Note to Mom - ratchet down that propeller speed - there are absolutely no rules banning profanity on Facebook. You have absolutely no leg to stand on.

My guess is that your little girl will get her sensitivities offended in school when she hears those words to her face. Lots and Lots of times as the story that she went running to Mommy over a silly cuss word will spread like wildfire.

You PM'd a child? You're the one who crossed the line now and went way overboard. If you were in that much of a tizzy over it, why didn't you speak to the girl's mother? You "should" be the grown adult in this situation.

A very similar thing happened last year with my 18 year old son. His girlfriend called another girl a name (the girl is 19), and the girl's mom went all mama bear on the gf, my son, me, and the gf's mother. She's become quite the laughing stock for causing all that drama over a teen tiff that would have been water under the bridge in a day or two.

Seriously, it sounds like you all need to take a step back from Facebook. It really wasn't *that* big of a deal.

A parent posting on a child's facebook page or messaging with threats of reporting is so out of line, it is unbelievable. Especially for something that was perfectly within the legal rights of Facebook.

If you don't like profanity, don't be on Facebook. Period.

Everyone makes a mistake once in awhile. However, your attitude that messaging a child, a minor, is perfectly acceptable, and the fact that you seem proud of it, is frankly scary.

Before you start becoming more and more involved in your child's facebook page and start messaging her friends, I would read up on another mother that got too involved. The authorities are still trying to figure out some way to prosecute her.

The child pm'd me back and apologized. All is well.

Yeah, until they meet up with your daughter at school.

I don't think the OP has to worry about deleting her daughter's facebook account.

Pretty sure after this debacle, somebody will report her daughter for being underage and Facebook will do it for her.

And then the daughter will have to be embarrassed again when she has to explain to her friends why she doesn't have a facebook account anymore, That it was due to her Mother's outrageous meddling and Facebook canceled her account for being underage.

 

[LilyWDW]

And soon we will see this post on here:

*sarcasm /on*

Dear Dis,

How would I report someone on facebook who is harassing my child? The parent of another child on there contacted my child, a minor, and threatened reporting her for something that isn't even against facebook rules. I don't think this is appropriate at all!

Also, how to I report someone who is not 13? According to my daughter, this woman's child is only 12, which IS against facebook policy...


*sarcasm /off*

 

[jazzielady]

Wow, you're all concerned about girl drama, how about DIS drama!

I can guarantee that all the drama is over here. No one will be making fun of my daughter, and if someone wants to report her for being 12, then so be it. If the girl's parents get upset by my intervention, then they'll be informed why. I don't know where the rest of you live, but telling someone to f-u by a minor is a no-no, at least in public.

As I previously said (and some of you obviously did not read all of my posts) I am not in the least offended by swear words, nor are my dd's. I was offeded by the DIRECTION of the f word, the WAY it was used.

Anyway, I've said my piece, and unless anything else comes to mind, I'm done with this thread.

Ps. I've turned off the engine and the rotors are nearly stopped now.

 

[jazzielady]

PPS. That last part was intended to be lighthearted, just in case anyone misinterprets it!

 

[LunchladyDoris]

Wow, you're all concerned about girl drama, how about DIS drama!

I can guarantee that all the drama is over here. No one will be making fun of my daughter, and if someone wants to report her for being 12, then so be it. If the girl's parents get upset by my intervention, then they'll be informed why. I don't know where the rest of you live, but telling someone to f-u by a minor is a no-no, at least in public.

As I previously said (and some of you obviously did not read all of my posts) I am not in the least offended by swear words, nor are my dd's. I was offeded by the DIRECTION of the f word, the WAY it was used.

Anyway, I've said my piece, and unless anything else comes to mind, I'm done with this thread.

Ps. I've turned off the engine and the rotors are nearly stopped now.

Bonjour, Pot care to meet Kettle?

By the way, pretty sure your daughter has had those words directed at her before and she most likely have said it herself.

 

[happygirl]

Wow, you're all concerned about girl drama, how about DIS drama!

I can guarantee that all the drama is over here. No one will be making fun of my daughter, and if someone wants to report her for being 12, then so be it. If the girl's parents get upset by my intervention, then they'll be informed why. I don't know where the rest of you live, but telling someone to f-u by a minor is a no-no, at least in public.

As I previously said (and some of you obviously did not read all of my posts) I am not in the least offended by swear words, nor are my dd's. I was offeded by the DIRECTION of the f word, the WAY it was used.

Anyway, I've said my piece, and unless anything else comes to mind, I'm done with this thread.

Ps. I've turned off the engine and the rotors are nearly stopped now.

I really hope the bolded part is true, I however don't think that will be the case 12 year can be so cruel without a reason.

 

[Bluestars]

It seems like the simplest solution would have been for your daughter to remove her as a friend.

 

[Stacerita]

To report a " friend " of my daughter's to the PTB at Facebook? My daughter expressed a negative opinion - no profanity, she knows better - about the Jonas Bros and this girl responded with the worst profanity, starting with an 'F', directed TO my daughter.

I asked my daughter who this girl was, and she said that she's in a different grade and that they're not friends in real life. This was one of those " friend of a friend " things. I told my dd12 that I want her to report her and delete her as a friend.

I will be happy to take the heat for reporting her, but I can't figure out how.

I plan to use this as a teachable moment with both daughters as to who to accept as a friend.

Seriously?

 

[Mickey's Minion]

Wow, you're all concerned about girl drama, how about DIS drama!

I can guarantee that all the drama is over here. No one will be making fun of my daughter, and if someone wants to report her for being 12, then so be it. If the girl's parents get upset by my intervention, then they'll be informed why. I don't know where the rest of you live, but telling someone to f-u by a minor is a no-no, at least in public.

As I previously said (and some of you obviously did not read all of my posts) I am not in the least offended by swear words, nor are my dd's. I was offeded by the DIRECTION of the f word, the WAY it was used.

Anyway, I've said my piece, and unless anything else comes to mind, I'm done with this thread.

Ps. I've turned off the engine and the rotors are nearly stopped now.

You should rethink the way you handled this.

You actually caused a New DIS Record.

6 pages of UNANIMOUS agreement. And every single post, from all sorts of posters, posters that usually cannot agree if the sky is blue, all agreeing that you handled this situation badly.

That really ought to tell you something.

I sincerely hope that your daughter will not be teased. That would not be pleasant for her and wouldn't wish that on any child.

Just sit back and rethink how you, as the adult, handled this situation so you can learn from it.

And in what country do you live that the F word is banned in public? I hear it on the airwaves all the time, see it in print all the time, hear it on the street, on the sports fields, etc all the time and nobody that I know has ever been arrested for swearing.

You must not live in the US.

 

[jazzielady]

Bonjour, Pot care to meet Kettle?

By the way, pretty sure your daughter has had those words directed at her before and she most likely have said it herself.

I don't doubt you're right.

 

[Scurvy]

I can guarantee that all the drama is over here. No one will be making fun of my daughter

Maybe tween girls are different in your neck of the woods than they are in most other places. And maybe this girl is nice and not one of the catty, "mean girl" types. I hope that's the case, because if not your daughter will be learning the hard way just how wrong you are. In most places, girls would most definitely be making fun of your daughter for having her mother fight her battles for her, especially since this was such a trivial thing to be fighting about, and wasn't even against the Facebook TOS.

Glad to hear you're dialing back the rotors a bit, at least. Life will be awfully difficult for your daughter if you're always swooping in to "help" her with situations she ought to be learning to handle for herself.

Mickey's Minion is right - this thread is amazing. I can't believe so many of us are agreeing about this!

 

[jazzielady]

Maybe it is a new record, I don't know; I'm not a prolific poster as you can see. But at least I'm not reporting everyone who disagrees with me! the mods would be busy all night!

I live in the US. To my knowledge, it is not ok to use the f word in any public school or on any tv channel except those you pay for. So if you live somewhere that it is permissible, I'd like to know where.

 

[Scurvy]

I live in the US. To my knowledge, it is not ok to use the f word in any public school or on any tv channel except those you pay for. So if you live somewhere that it is permissible, I'd like to know where.

I don't know of any school that allows the use of that word, though of course students use it anyway. It definitely isn't allowed on basic cable. But none of that matters, because it is permissible to use that language on Facebook. You can't change the rules of Facebook to make it better fit your daughter, nor can you demand that her friends alter their behavior or language to suit your preferences unless they are in your home. If you don't want your child to encounter language which you find objectionable on Facebook then your only real option is to keep your child out of that environment.

 

[sunnyday123]

Wow, you're all concerned about girl drama, how about DIS drama!

I can guarantee that all the drama is over here. No one will be making fun of my daughter, and if someone wants to report her for being 12, then so be it. If the girl's parents get upset by my intervention, then they'll be informed why. I don't know where the rest of you live, but telling someone to f-u by a minor is a no-no, at least in public.

As I previously said (and some of you obviously did not read all of my posts) I am not in the least offended by swear words, nor are my dd's. I was offeded by the DIRECTION of the f word, the WAY it was used.

Anyway, I've said my piece, and unless anything else comes to mind, I'm done with this thread.

Ps. I've turned off the engine and the rotors are nearly stopped now.

I just took a poll of one 12 year old that lives in my house.

Most assuredly your DD12 will be made fun of. Maybe not to her face, but it will be talked about. Have you missed out on tween drama? If so, get ready, it's a'comin.

And if you weren't offended by the word, it wouldn't have been a question posted here. And you really can't be offended by something that happens when you're breaking rules, know what I mean?

Can we make this thread a sticky, just because we all agreed? ( Ok, all of us minus one!)

 

[Ceila]

But at least I'm not reporting everyone who disagrees with me!

Of course you wouldnt. It isn't appropriate to report people simply because you disagree with them.

the mods would be busy all night!

Not really, since nobody has broken the DIS terms of service.

 

[Carly_Roach]

Not really, since nobody has broken the DIS terms of service.

Unless one of us swears at her.

What I suspect happened is that this poster, a grown woman, intimidated a 13 y/o into apologizing for making a remark on FB by threatening her. No more, no less. What I believe her daughter may have learned is that in any situation, no matter how innocuous, you can browbeat, intimidate, or threaten others in order to get your way.

That's just how I see it. YMMV.