Is it Okay for an Employee to Ask for Some Slack...

va32h

DIS Veteran
Joined
Mar 2, 2005
Messages
4,668
when they are having a temporary crisis?

I am otherwise a good, solid, reliable, employee. But I am going through a devastating personal time right now and as a result of my distracted mind and personal stress, I made a big (but fixable) error at work last week. I have also had some minor lapses in concentration, that thankfully, a kind coworker discovered and fixed for me. My superiors are justifiably annoyed, and I am in a panic that they will fire me. And now is really not a good time for me to be out of a job.

I am not normally the type to make excuses. My philosophy is that my problems are not my boss' problems. I have had the same general ups and downs as anyone else (car trouble, childcare, etc) and just took care of it without letting it affect my performance at all.

But my current crisis is not something I can just take care of right away, but I do feel I can pull myself together. So my question is, should I say to my bosses, "last week's error was caused by XYZ, and I am extremely sorry, and I am taking care of that, and it won't happen again." or does that just sound like whining?
 
Personally I wouldn't see it as whining. Especially if this isnt' like you. Things happen and come up. I would explain to them what happened with the error and let them know that you are taking care of it. I could see it being a problem if you were the type of person that had weekly crisis. But if not, then I dont see nothing wrong with it.
 
I always try to be completely honest with my boss. You're right that your problems are not your boss's or your company's problems, but when huge issues hit, I think you need to share with your supervisors what's going on and ask for their help in whatever way you need it (whether that's cutting you a little slack or helping to keep you on track). That's not only respecting yourself and your limits, but also respecting that you expect your boss to be concerned about your personal growth in addition to the company's bottom line.

My close friend and roommate was recently diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer at a very young age. I told my supervisor and her boss immediately (even before the diagnosis), as I'm my friend's closest support and wanted to accompany her to doctor's appointments, surgeries, treatments, etc. My supervisors have been wonderful, concerned about my well-being, and willing to allow me to use my sick days to accompany her to appointments.
 
:grouphug: I would tell your supervisor some of what's going on. You don't want to give them the impression that you are just not as interested in your job or could be looking for a new one. I don't think you need to give them all the details, but if your work is slipping you owe them an explanation(it's not an excuse). Hope you can pull things together soon
 

I would tell them in a matter of fact way just like you described. They need to know that you care about your job but are having a little difficulty at the moment. You may find that they will be totally supportive and help you in some way.
 
I think it is perfectly fine to do exactly what you stated... and on another note.. I hope things get better for you! :sunny:

Kathy
 
I definitely want to send some good thoughts your way, I realy hope things get better soon.

I totally agree with others that you should share a bit of what is going on with your boss. You are a human being and so is he/she. If you have never done that before, I would imagine your boss will know this is an extra difficult time, for you to be mentioning it. I bet you wll be surprised at how understanding he/she will be and your boss will be relieved that there is a reason for your recent change of demeanor. (trust me, people notice the just do not know why- they usually assume it is just bad attitude, you don't want that)


Btw, my DH is a boss and one of his biggest complaints when employees are not upfront about what is going on until it is affecting them in a really bad way on the job. He is very understanding and will go out of hiss way to help in any way he can when people come to him and say "Things are rough right now", he has been there himself. We all have.

Again, {{{HUGS}}} I really hope things get better soon. If you ever need to talk, I am just a pm away.

ETA...and no, it is not whining. It is reaching out. Sometimes we need to do that.
 
As a former boss, I would much, much rather have heard from the employee that he had some personal difficulties, than wonder why a usually good employee was suddenly messing stuff up. Depending on what your crisis is, and what your relationship with your boss is like, you could either tell him exactly what's going on, or something more generic. Personally, I'd rather hear exactly what it is, to be able to truly understand. To me, it would only sound like whining if it started occuring a lot, for very minor things, which is not what this sounds like.

Could you take a little time off to deal with it? Might it be covered under FMLA?

Good luck. I hope you get things worked out satisfactorily. :grouphug:
 
I'm a human resources manager and I suggest that you discuss your concerns with your manager or human resources representative. It is important for them to know that you are experiencing a crisis so they can take that into consideration when assigning you work. Don't reveal a lot of personal details as that can be uncomfortable for you and your manager. Give a brief overview of the situation and explain how it might affect your work performance. Don't be surprised if they recommend that you take some time off work or suggest that you speak to an EAP or mental health counselor.

If your crisis is related to a health concern then you may be eligible for protections under various federal and state laws.

Good luck!
 
As an owner of a business I would be grateful if one of my employee's was up front with me. Good people are very hard to come by. If my employee had a good work history with my company I would do my best to work threw it untill they are back to normal.

Good luck and I hope it all turnes out well for you.
 
I would do it just as you stated. My sister recently told her boss that she was getting a divorce and it was starting to get ugly. The boss is very understanding and makes sure that my sister gets out on time to pick up my niece from after care, let's her work from home when the weather is looking bad (no school), etc.
I hope things get better for you. :grouphug:
 
nealymouse said:
As an owner of a business I would be grateful if one of my employee's was up front with me. Good people are very hard to come by. If my employee had a good work history with my company I would do my best to work threw it untill they are back to normal.

Good luck and I hope it all turnes out well for you.

This is exactly whatI wanted to say. As one of the owners of a family-run business I can only say that we appreciate such honesty greatly. I especially remember onw case we had with an employee who suddenly started failing at things she had never failed before at. Her sales went down, tasks she was supposed to perform we not well done, if done at all and so on.

None of us knew why, since she had always been a very valued employee. My mother decided to have a talk with her and she did. She told her that we had noticed that something wasn´t the way it used to be and that she hoped it wasn´t because she didn´t like the job anymore and wanted to quit. At that point, the poor lady started crying and told my mom that her husband had just found out that his ex-wife was abusing alcohol and their children and that hehad just started a very nasty custody battle. Her mind was occupied with these worries all day long, and inevitably they interefered with her work presentation. Of course, this changed the situation for everyone. The lady was happy that we knew what was going on, since she of course had also been worried about being fired, and we knew that there were valid reasons for her behaviour.

We told her that she could take time off whenever she felt she needed it and that she would not have to work saturdays. That way, she could focus on her step-children on the weekends they were with them.

I hope you have an understanding employer and that you can tell him what´s going on (you don´t have to go into details).

Good luck :)
 
I agree with all of the above replies. When DH was deployed I had a lot on my plate taking care of my two kids and the house on my own while working full time. Not to mention all the worries that went along with DH being in a combat zone! I consider myself a very reliable and conscientious employee, but there were times when I just wasn't operating at 100% capacity. I never wanted to used DH's deployment as an excuse, nor did I expect or need sympathy, but sometimes a person can only handle so much...

My boss knew all about my situation, and because I've always been a dedicated employee, he definitely cut me some slack on the few days when I needed it. Since you've been such a good employee in the past, I think your boss will really appreciate your honesty instead of just wondering what's going on and thinking you may be just unhappy with your job.

Good luck, and I hope your situation improves quickly!

Jynohn
 
I would do as suggested above, but I think I would add something more. Let your employer know that you take full responsibility for your mistake, and you are taking proactive steps so that it won't happen again. Maybe you can request some additional assistance from someone in your department. And share if there is some sort of time frame where things will be cleared up, so they don't think this is a problem that will go on indefinitely.

Hope things improve for you soon.

Denae :grouphug:
 
If this is a true abberation for you I would go and talk to them and be honest. Tell them you are not looking for special favors but point out your work history and see if something can be done about your workload.
 
Nothing new to add (I agree) except that I'm sending you good thoughts and prayers and hope things clear up soon for you.
 



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