Is Grandma a Princess or a Pirate? UPDATE 9/28! The Last Suppah! PICS!! Pg. 69!

:idea: How much do I owe you for my shopping spree. I need to send you some $$ I forgot :scared1: sorry!
 
I just did the splits and a back handspring. Here in my bedroom. didja see it???
 

I SWEAR I responded to this yesterday, but my post went poof. HAve I been put in time out and didn't know it:confused3 :smokin:

I can't believe how much you guys got done in such a short amount of time.

Here is to you...

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that is so cute!

:rotfl2:

:rotfl2: Well, I'm NOT a sound sleeper. Hence the whole snoring fiasco of 08!

:faint:

Daughta of tha Motha said:
The gym shall return in future episodes!

:faint:

Short people can flip too! :rotfl2:

yes, we certainly can! ::yes::
 
Jen, I have to go :wave: This is the girls last day of school. They get there report cards today. Lets hope they did well ;)
 
Me: Well, no crap Sherlock. It’s 6:00 in the morning.
Somehow I find this even funnier than the kidnapping comment. :rotfl2:

Jen said:
When we got through with the floozy show…it was still bearly (get it??) 10:30.

::yes:: Beary punny.

Jen said:
I know those who think IASW is the devil. And so do I…to a point. But come on people…it’s a requirement at least once a trip. Notice I said ONCE. Remember this!

It's by far not my favorite, but my 5 year olds LOVED it last year. I bet Lexie did, too, no? Good luck with the ONCE thing, though. ;)
 
I'm new and lovin' in! I read the whole thing in one sitting! :) Can't wait for more.

If you think this one is funny then you should read our report from last summer!! :lmao:


Jennifer has been pressuring me to post more...not just read....so....I'll try....maybe it will keep me from infecting my child with the chicken pox again!!!! (BTW, I did that today....let Kaia get the vaccine --all the while forgetting that she cannot have live vaccines:headache: ....I win Mother of the Year!! NO worries...Jennifer is on her way with the vodka!!!!;) )
 
Last I left you, *I* was out on the balcony. By myself. Avoiding the symphony of snores coming from the inside.

While out there, the man from the next room comes out on his balcony to smoke.

***Note, please, that the balconies are close enough to touch practically.

Mr. Stinks-a-lot came out to share his cancer stick with me. Literally.

He slides open his door and sits in his chair. He looks over at me and oh so graciously offers me up a cig. Please. I don’t *do* that stuff. I have standards. :snooty: No lung cancer here. I’d much rather drink myself into liver failure. Pffft.

He asks if I mind if HE smokes.

I give him that look like: “Do you REALLY want me to answer that?”

He shrugs and lights his cig. And then proceeds to tell me alllllll about his life. Apparently, Ex-Mrs. Stinks-a-lot, their children, Current Mrs. Stinks-a-lot, AND him, all came to Disney together. On a family vacation. When I raised my eyebrows as he informed me of his situation, he swore up and down that they all “get along famously”. In fact, they all reside in the same home. Woweewowow! And “it works for them, thank you very much.” After all…”who wouldn’t want two wives to cook and clean for you?” :crazy2: But, here at Disney…they couldn’t afford dos roomos at SSR. So, he set up Ex-Mrs. Stinks-a-lot over at POP. With their kids. While he and Current Mrs. Stinks-a-lot had a few private nights by themselves. Where they didn’t have to be interrupted in their “vacation” by children or his ex-wife. :rolleyes:

Please additionally note that I never said one word during his pleasant “story.” Not one word. During my expellation of snorts, pshaws, eye rolls, and retching sounds…he totally ignored me. I got up and went inside without ever saying a word.

Later in our trip, I heard some “yelling” coming from the next room. Good times. Good times. :thumbsup2

Around 3:30, the kidlets and the motha woke from their oh so pleasant naps. Yay for them.

Lexie wanted to go play on the playground next to our building. So did Jon.

Mom: You wanna come with us?
Me: Ummmm…nope. No thanks. You guys go willingly throw yourselves into the heat and humidity for not that much enjoyment. I’ll stay here in the AC…thanks so much.

I’m not even joking…they were gone 10 minutes. :rotfl2: In total. That includes the walk there and back!

I checked everyone for BO and we were off for the covered benches.

BOOYAH!!! Here they are in all their glory!

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We were back at MK by 4:30.

We quick picked up a kid-pusher and were off to wind around the castle.

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We were headed back to Fantasyland. To finish off what hadn’t been done this morning.

On the way to our first destination, my motha spies a place she has to stop in…the Tinkerbelle Store. I don’t know what it’s really called, but you know what I’m talking about. Has everything fairy a little girl…and maybe some really chic grown men…would want! The motha was on the hunt for a souvie for my youngest niece, Isa. Isa loooooves Tinkerbelle. So much so that she renamed Apolo, her huge, male Golden Retriever, Tinkerbelle! The motha took about 10 seconds to find a cute little Tink clock for Isa for her room.

And we were off…

To Snow White!

No wait here either!

On and off in no time. Yea baybee!

From Snow White we headed over for the next showing of Philharmagic!

Jon and I love this show so much! Although I did find it sort of rude when some jerk behind me said…very loudly by the way…”I wish that chick would quit singing!” :rolleyes1

I turned around and gave that punk my “evil eye.” Although I don’t know if he saw it…since I was wearing those oh-so-attractive 3-D glasses at the time. But, he got my gist. My “evil eye” can bring grown men to their knees. Believe that! I can give Jon the “evil eye” from 50 yards away and he knows to immediately succumb to Her Highness, his mother, and snap into line. It’s a gift. Heh heh. ;)

From Philharmagic we swung around to Pooh. This ride is awwwright in my book…so why then…is the line always 45+ minutes long?

We GAC’d this one.

We’re standing in our little numbered line…with one group in front of us…when Pooh goes all to poop. I have no idea what the frick happened. But, the dear CM…and I’ll call her that loosely…as she kept screaming at all of us as if her incompetence was our fault…couldn’t get the ride to work. She couldn’t get the little doors to swing open to allow people onto the ride, so cars kept flying by empty. Then, she had to stop the cars to try to catch herself up. But, she couldn’t get those dern honey pots stopped. People already on the ride neared the place to disembark from their pots, and one would be able to get off, before the pot would again go hurling into the Hundred Acre Wood with a passenger still hanging on for dear life. All the while…the Eeyore CM is pushing button after button…trying to gain control of the honey pots. Because it’s a hard job…I guess…:confused3

The most disturbing thing happens next. :worried: A honey pot comes hurling around the end of the ride…and an elderly lady exits. Or rather, she jumps off the ride quickly before her pot goes hurtling out of control away from her…with her disabled daughter still inside, who was probably around 30ish. The lady still inside the pot, stops dead in front of us…but, of course, she can’t get off here. No room for her wheelchair. So, she must go around again. By herself. And rude people, who see this happen…laugh. :scared1: At the poor girl still in the honey pot…whose eyes were as wide as saucers.

People. If I didn’t have my child with me…I would have let you have it. If you’re reading this now…this is for you! “You ain’t worth a pile o’ pooh.” There, I said it. But, I have class. And I behave like a lady in front of my son. (until later tonight) But, if he wouldn’t have been there…oh…the crap woulda hit the fan. I would have thrown my hair clip on the floor. I would have shamed you like your momma when she caught you picking your nose at your grandmamma’s funeral. SHAME! I’m done.

We did eventually get on the ride without a hitch. Because apparently…that CM re-learned how to push a button.

It was nearing 6:30, and Jon was complainin’ that he needed feedin’! Kids. They expect you to provide a roof over their heads AND feed them? It’s almost too much.

I wanted to go to Casey’s.

But, it was at this moment, where my mother selectively chose to be Jewish again. Even though I informed her the “dogs” at Casey’s were ALL BEEF…they were not Hebrew National…and were probably not Kosher. Gawd fahbid.

So, we chose a spot nearby. Where I had never eaten before. Pinocchio Village Haus.

I had Jon sit at a table by the windows…SCORE…while the motha, Lexie and I jumped in line to order food.

Jon and Lexie got pizza, and I got the turkey bacon panini. As did my motha. Ummm…guess bacon is Kosher…right ma??? :confused3

The food here was ehhhhhh. BUT…did you know you can look out the windows and wave to people entering IASW???

Me either! But, I learned it today!!!

Lexie parked herself right next to the window and waved at everyone in their boats like she was Miss America. Only she was actually eating…food…that had calories…

After Miss American finished her grand waving…we were going to head over to Dumbo. BUT…the line was about 8 million people long. I promised to return here on Saturday…and we were off in search of another ride.

I let Jon pick what he wants to do next…as I have fulfilled everything on my checklist for the day!

Yea baybee!

(APPLAUSE BREAKE FOR ME!)

Jon picks Buzz. So, we went off to save the Universe. From Emperor Zorg. Or is it Zurg? Hmmmm…inquiring minds want to know…

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Jon begs me to let him win.

Yea, kid…ain’t gonna happen. Well, I was thinking about it…BUT THEN…

I apparently hit some super point bulls-eye, because I get 108,000 points! And I rub it in Jon’s face…cause I’m nice like that.

Judge me if you want…but I don’t let my kid win (mostly). I’m competitive. Just yesterday I took him down like a sumo wrestler on Amy Winehouse when we played Battleship. And really people…what the heck is up with dear Amy? She looks a little used and abused. I wonder what she’s hiding in that hair??? Just sayin’…

From Buzz, Jon has yet another request.

Carousel of Progress. This thing is one of Jon’s favs. And I hate to admit…it’s a little guilty pleasure of mine too. Although the last scene…of the family living in the 21st century…all dressed in their 80s garb…really cracks me up. :rotfl:

When CoP is done, it’s nearing 8:00…and I decide we should score some primo spots for Spectro. I decide to position us over in Liberty Square. We had sat here last year and had an awesome view.

I find a prime spot in front of the portrait-drawing stop in front of Ye Olde Christmas Shop.

Here was our view of the castle!

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Here is Lexie waiting for her first parade!

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And just so you remember what I look like…Jon and I…

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We were a full hour early! BUT…I had a plan to hold the chilluns over till the parade rambled through!

ICE CREAM!!!! Or as I like to call it…edible rewards!!!

I leave the motha, Lexie, and Jon in our spot while I go scope an ice cream cart. I’m standing in line when my phone rings. It’s Jon asking me where I am. I tell him I’ll be back in a few minutes with treats! He says to hurry because Lexie has to go potty.

Geez. Hold it for ice cream kid.

I’m ordering when my phone rings again.

It’s my motha.

Lexie had to go really bad so she left Jon…BY HIMSELF…WITH A NICE LOOKING STRANGER IN OUR SPOT! But…it’s okay…because “THE LADY HAD A CHILD AND LOOKED NICE!”

Excuse me? Have you lost your mind?

I throw money at the dude, grab up the treats…and RUN to our spot.

And there’s Jon. Next to the “nice looking stranger.”

Minutes later, my motha walks up with Lexie…and I give her the “evil eye.” My mother, by the way, is a social worker. You know…one of those people who protects children from monsters and neglectful family like herself.

I am no longer talking to her. And the expiration on spending time with the motha has just run out. After only 36 hours together. And that news crew is probably going to be needed tonight…but right now…right now I can’t waste this ice cream!!!

Lexie chomped down on her first Mickey Bar and she was in HEAVEN!!!

We really did have the best spots…only room for one person behind us, so hopefully, nobody will be leaning over my head to snap pics this year. It’s hard being 4’11”! ::yes::

A few minutes before the parade was to begin…a couple stands behind us. No biggie. There’s room for us all…but this spot here…under my feet…this is my spot.

You can see the man behind Jon in this pic…(I know it’s not really nice to post strangers on the internet…but these people took the cake)

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Within no time…we see IT! Hum it with me…

Dummmmm…dummmm…dummmmdadadummmm…

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I love Spectro.

And the lady, who had been standing behind me…begins to inch herself up. Into my son’s spot. That he has been standing in for over an hour.

Jon scoots over a little towards me.

I’m thinking…”She’s a little pushy”…but I try to remember the Disney attitude. And we’re enjoying the parade…

The lady scoots in a little more…so Jon is now standing perpendicular to the rope…with very little space to stand in.

Hmmmmmmmm…

And then this LADY…pushes (YES…PUSHES!) my kid totally out of the way…so he now is standing behind her and he can’t see a dern thing…

And that’s when the real pushin’ and shovin’ happens…

Up Next: Oh Yes…You Understand What I’m Sayin’! The (almost) Throwdown at WDW!
 
Woooohoooo first :yay::yay::yay:

Please additionally note that I never said one word during his pleasant “story.” Not one word. During my expellation of snorts, pshaws, eye rolls, and retching sounds…he totally ignored me. I got up and went inside without ever saying a word.
He talked and talked and you didn't say anything yet he still went on? :rotfl2:

I checked everyone for BO and we were off
You didn't :rotfl:

No wait here either!
Wow it sounds like a great time to go!

So, she must go around again. By herself. And rude people, who see this happen…laugh. :scared1: At the poor girl still in the honey pot…whose eyes were as wide as saucers.
OMG, now I would have laughed if it had been a Dad etc but a disabled child :eek: :headache:

Lexie had to go really bad so she left Jon…BY HIMSELF…WITH A NICE LOOKING STRANGER IN OUR SPOT! But…it’s okay…because “THE LADY HAD A CHILD AND LOOKED NICE!
OMG she didn't :mad:

And then this LADY…pushes (YES…PUSHES!) my kid totally out of the way…so he now is standing behind her and he can’t see a dern thing…
Noooooo :headache:

And that’s when the real pushin’ and shovin’ happens…
Uh oh popcorn::
 
OK, so I missed the last few updates. You have met some real winners on this trip (including Motha).

As for the lady pushing Jon, I so would have had your back if I had been there. Now c'mon where are the detailspopcorn::
 
He shrugs and lights his cig. And then proceeds to tell me alllllll about his life. Apparently, Ex-Mrs. Stinks-a-lot, their children, Current Mrs. Stinks-a-lot, AND him, all came to Disney together. On a family vacation. When I raised my eyebrows as he informed me of his situation, he swore up and down that they all “get along famously”. In fact, they all reside in the same home. Woweewowow! And “it works for them, thank you very much.” After all…”who wouldn’t want two wives to cook and clean for you?” :crazy2: But, here at Disney…they couldn’t afford dos roomos at SSR. So, he set up Ex-Mrs. Stinks-a-lot over at POP. With their kids. While he and Current Mrs. Stinks-a-lot had a few private nights by themselves. Where they didn’t have to be interrupted in their “vacation” by children or his ex-wife. :rolleyes:

Why do I feel like I read about this on the CM? :eek: The tale was from the ex-wife and she didn't know if she should let ex and new wife come along. Seriously. It was on there.

Can't wait to read about the throw-down at Spectro. I will live vicariously through you because we had one of those "Oh, look...it's 8:55. I guess it's time to find a spot for the parade right in front of these people" families and I wanted to :furious:
 
Jon and Lexie got pizza, and I got the turkey bacon panini. As did my motha. Ummm…guess bacon is Kosher…right ma???

I can hear her now saying..."Bacon...like real bacon....I thought they meant a "turkey bacon" panini...not a turkey and bacon panini.....I would have never eaten pork knowingly!!!!!" HAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!
 











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