Is a church wedding 'open to the public?'

[mrsklamc]

OMG I hope that is a joke or you are being sarcastic. What church would actually call the police on someone..wedding or private event or not. That is sad.

I said "if they were not wanted by the couple," as in, if the couple specifically had a problem with them being there. It's not as though invitations are checked at the door. It's the couple's day and their party, and in our particular church there is no tradition that it must be open to the public. I have no idea why anyone would think the fact that it is a church would mean they cannot call the cops if someone is trespassing.

 

[creativeamanda]

Many churches in my area are rented for space for weddings, especially if the people being married are not members.

Why would anyone invite themselves to a wedding they were not invited to. Seems rude to me.

 

[epcot.girl]

I do understand people having different views, but there are some really nasty people on the other thread. Going so far as to say I only want to bring my DD to make the bride uncomfortable.... No idea why someone who doesn't know me would jump to think the worst of me, but...whatcha gonna do?

I haven't seen anyone being nasty on the other thread, just a lot of people disagreeing with you instead of telling you what you want to hear.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

Rent the church? Never heard of such a thing.

I believe our church charges a fee for wedding for non-members. We also charge a fee for using the fellowship hall for the reception, as well as using the kitchen, and that's for everyone.

 

[creativeamanda]

I believe our church charges a fee for wedding for non-members. We also charge a fee for using the fellowship hall for the reception, as well as using the kitchen, and that's for everyone.

It costs a lot of money to use the church facilities. The light bil alone is horrendous. Donations to churches are down worldwide.

Yeah, they have to charge fees. By the way, if you use a school facility (taxpayer property), it's likely you will have to pay a rental fee, as well.

 

[JamesMom]

A church is open to the public based on the rules setup by the owners. Depending on the demoniation that could be the diocese or the congregation themselves. If they decide to lock the doors at certain times they are free to do so.

If you pay to rent the church for your wedding ceremony, you would be well within your rights to restrict access to the ceremony. it happens all the time.

Take Mormon Temples for instance, you must have a temple recommend (devout Latter-Day Saint) to attend even if it is your own child getting married.

Anyways, when I watched our Disney Pavillion wedding video I noticed a woman sitting in the back (not hard to notice since there were only 11 people at my wedding including hubby and I). Not sure why she was there, but maybe Disney weddings are 'open', too .
Also, Episcopal weddings are open to the congregation but I think good manners keep people out. Now that I am catholic, I see people going in and out all the time to pray so they may unintentially walk into a wedding. I've seen it happen when visiting the church for RCIA or Scouts or kids classs touring the church. Sometimes people go in to just pray even when Mass is happening during the week.

 

[mjkacmom]

Many churches in my area are rented for space for weddings, especially if the people being married are not members.

Why would anyone invite themselves to a wedding they were not invited to. Seems rude to me.

In order to get married at our church (or any Catholic church in the area) you must be a member of that church, for a specific period of time. They are not rentable.

 

[declansdad]

In order to get married at our church (or any Catholic church in the area) you must be a member of that church, for a specific period of time. They are not rentable.

Not the same everywhere. Our wedding was a Catholic wedding but I am not Catholic and the church we were married in was not my wife's parish church.

 

[Andy B]

In this country the ceremony has two telling parts it says b'efore god and this congregation' not invited guests and also the service says 'if anyone here present has due cause to object' and you have to issue 'banns'

The purpose of banns is to enable anyone to raise any canonical or civil legal impediment to the marriage, so as to prevent marriages that are invalid. Impediments vary between legal jurisdictions, but would normally include a pre-existing marriage that has been neither dissolved nor annulled, a vow of celibacy, lack of consent, or the couple's being related within the prohibited degrees of kinship.

So the service has to be open to anyone who can turn up and object

 

[mhsjax]

I think this seems to be more of a Catholic thing. We are Baptist and our church isn't just open anytime during the day. I have never seen anyone other than the invited show up at a wedding ceremony, but then again we don't have Mass with out either, with that I could understand it. I wouldn't be happy if strangers showed up at my wedding, or people I didn't invite.

 

[Nancyg56]

Ours was a catholic wedding and it wasn't open to the public.

It was, you just did not know it. No one is turned away from a Mass in a Catholic Church.

A church is open to the public based on the rules setup by the owners. Depending on the demoniation that could be the diocese or the congregation themselves. If they decide to lock the doors at certain times they are free to do so.

If you pay to rent the church for your wedding ceremony, you would be well within your rights to restrict access to the ceremony. it happens all the time.

You do not rent the Church. You are giving a donation to the Church. I have never heard that you can restrict access to Mass. Never.

When I got married in a Catholic church we did not "rent" the church. We made a "donation" (a mandatory one BTW).

 

[Coconut36]

I said "if they were not wanted by the couple," as in, if the couple specifically had a problem with them being there. It's not as though invitations are checked at the door. It's the couple's day and their party, and in our particular church there is no tradition that it must be open to the public. I have no idea why anyone would think the fact that it is a church would mean they cannot call the cops if someone is trespassing.

Yeah I still that is extremely nasty for church members/officials to be calling the police because someone seeks out the church on the day of an event (and/or that members of that church would go so far as to want that to occur..such a loving religious way to treat people )

I mean I don't advocate crashing weddings but I would also like to think if I was in need of a place to pray I would not be hauled off by the police either.

 

[JVL1018]

I had people come to my wedding that weren't invited. My friend's dad and stepmom came-the daughter was in the wedding- my neighbor(who was invited)his aunt and cousins came(I knew them my whole life and babysat the cousins). I thought it was sweet that they cared enough to come see me get married.

At my brother's wedding, my 2 best friends were babysitting my 2 children(6 months and 2 years old at the time), and they brought them to the church..and then my kids were there for pictures and then went home with my friends.

At a wedding my husband was in, the bride's hairdresser(mine also) came to the church to see the wedding.

I brought my daughter to a wedding of friends of ours. She was about 6, old enough to behave, old enough to be excited to see a pretty bride, so she came to the church with DH and I and then we took her home before we went to the reception.

It happens ALL the time here. It is nothing anyone even thinks twice about.

 

[A_Princess'_Daddy]

Not the same everywhere. Our wedding was a Catholic wedding but I am not Catholic and the church we were married in was not my wife's parish church.

I'm fairly confident that there was paperwork done behind the scenes, quite likely that you are not even aware of, transferring your wife's rights to be married to a different church, as the canons of the Roman Catholic Church are universal across all churches, regardless of parish, diocese, nation, etc. and you cannot just "show up and get married" at any church that you choose (I put that in quotes not to denigrate, but to clarify). It's part of the "One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic church" concept that is central to Roman Catholicism and is therefore included in the R.C. Nicene Creed, i.e. the Profession of Faith.* If this is not the case, then, quite bluntly, you were likely married in a schismatic Church.

O.K., enough Roman Catholicism nerd talk for now...

*To my fellow Roman Catholics, I know that it actually means a lot more than that, but I want to stay away from the canonical lectures and try to stay as "on point" as possible.

 

[Costumesaremylife]

Yes. I have watched a few at St. Patricks Cathedral in NY.

I guess it is a Catholic thing. I knew that you had to be a Mormon to go to a Mormon wedding. Even when I was a kid I attended the church services of some weddings where I wasn't invited to the reception. I have a huge family and the kids didn't always get invited.

 

[declansdad]

It was, you just did not know it. No one is turned away from a Mass in a Catholic Church.



You do not rent the Church. You are giving a donation to the Church. I have never heard that you can restrict access to Mass. Never.

Thanks for telling me what happened at our wedding.

 

[declansdad]

I'm fairly confident that there was paperwork done behind the scenes, quite likely that you are not even aware of, transferring your wife's rights to be married to a different church, as the canons of the Roman Catholic Church are universal across all churches, regardless of parish, diocese, nation, etc. and you cannot just "show up and get married" at any church that you choose (I put that in quotes not to denigrate, but to clarify). It's part of the "One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic church" concept that is central to Roman Catholicism and is therefore included in the R.C. Nicene Creed, i.e. the Profession of Faith.* If this is not the case, then, quite bluntly, you were likely married in a schismatic Church.

O.K., enough Roman Catholicism nerd talk for now...

*To my fellow Roman Catholics, I know that it actually means a lot more than that, but I want to stay away from the canonical lectures and try to stay as "on point" as possible.

I didn't say there wasn't permission given but it still doesn't change the fact that we were not in a public building or that it was open to the public.

 

[mrsklamc]

Yeah I still that is extremely nasty for church members/officials to be calling the police because someone seeks out the church on the day of an event (and/or that members of that church would go so far as to want that to occur..such a loving religious way to treat people )

I mean I don't advocate crashing weddings but I would also like to think if I was in need of a place to pray I would not be hauled off by the police either.

Well, of course, they would be politely asked to leave, first. There is also no particular need for prayer to be in a church.

There's nothing nasty about it, our particular church is simply not open to the public at all times. The bride and groom have reserved the space, and have the right to determine who can and can't be there. There's also nothing unloving about appropriate boundaries.

 

[CurlyJo224]

It might just be a Catholic thing. No church I've ever attended has been open to the public all the time. You want to come to church, you come on Sundays or Wednesdays when there are services. You want to pray, feel free. You don't need to be in a special building to do that.

A wedding ceremony, unless held during the regular church services, is a private event. If you are not invited, you are trespassing. Period.

 

[Coconut36]

Well, of course, they would be politely asked to leave, first. There is also no particular need for prayer to be in a church.

There's nothing nasty about it, our particular church is simply not open to the public at all times. The bride and groom have reserved the space, and have the right to determine who can and can't be there. There's also nothing unloving about appropriate boundaries.

Wow..just wow. All I can say is that is not a belief system or church I would attend.

Like I said..I am not for crashing weddings or anything but churches have meaning to people and there are times when they want to seek the solace of one for one reason or another. To think people would think nothing of having them forcibly removed by the police because "there is no need for prayer to be in church". I guess I can't see how that is a decent way someone would start their married life..by calling the police on people who come to the church because it's all about them and their wedding.

Maybe it is because I am Catholic and there is someone physically present every day of the week, Mass held every day (sometimes more than once a day especially during certain holidays) and people are always welcome (as I mentioned in most parishes I have been in there is an area that would be used/open to others if a ceremony or wedding was going on). It is locked when nobody is there because of possible risk of vandalism or theft but that is it (and I believe that doesn't happen until the evening..sometimes lateish as they have youth activities there most nights).