Inspired by another thread - 4 hrs between wedding and reception

[petchie]

You didn't really have a break in the activities though since everyone was invited to your parents in between. It sounds like a fun way to do a wedding though because people can sit and chat and catch up without all the music in the background from the dance.

Which is why it really is done. You need a few really good friends willing to miss the church and set up for the party, and most of them stay and clean up as well. They just show up to the reception late. We return the favor when their kids get married. Our neighborhood is very close since the families have stayed the same through the generations.

 

[luvmy3]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

I've never been to a Catholic wedding that wasn't on a Saturday with a full dinner reception, including my own. There have been breaks between the ceremony and the reception start time but along the lines of an hour to 2, never more and never without something for the guests like hor d'oeuvres and music. We had an open bar during that time. I couldn't imaginer making my guests wait over that for my reception unless there was something else planned in between like what the pp's family does. Of course I assume that all guests in the OP were aware of the time gap since the invitation most likely mentioned the times, so they did make the choice however I'm betting they were expecting something more than just a bar.

 

[powellrj]

Unless its a local wedding, we usually send regrets because its just too hard to try to kill time in a strange city.

We had an interesting situation a few months ago. A family member was married in the afternoon and then was suppose to have the reception at 5:30is. I can't remember the exact times, but it was enough of a gap that we sent our regrets. My parents went to the wedding. Only problem was everyone showed up at the county club at the assigned time only to sit around until the wedding party showed up around 9:30. It seems they had a private reception planned where they had pictures taken and kept the wedding guests sitting around with no food until they arrived. It wasn't a pleasant experience. Add to the fact the wedding party all showed up falling down drunk.

 

[Katieinwonderland]

Our wedding had a two hour gap between the end of the ceremony and the reception. The ceremony was in a church and the reception was at the Yacht Club Resort in Disney - where most of the guests were staying. We bussed everyone back to the resort from the church, then we went off to have photos taken. Some of the guests went back to their rooms but most went to the bar! A lot of the families with kids went to the pool and skipped the cocktail hour, just coming to the reception - that was fine with us, it gave the kids time to run around between sitting still in church and sitting down to eat dinner. The cocktail hour had an open bar and appetizers, so people didn't have to buy food or drink if they didn't want to.

Almost all the weddings I've been to have been in DH's family (BIG Catholic Italian family!) and with all of them, there has been a break inbetween where we've gone back to someones house in between to have drinks and some snacks. Most were OK, but with one the ceremony ended at 1.00pm and the reception was at 7.00pm. That was a looooooong time sitting at someones house, where the food (and the alcohol!) ran out pretty quickly!

 

[leight]

lol! This scenario caused a brawl at my 1st wedding 20 yrs ago. My mother changed my Sunday catholic ceremony to a mass- my fiance and his family/friends were christians so I changed it back to a ceremony. The church was at 4pm and the cocktail hour started at 7pm about 40 minutes away from the church. In between, we rented an historical mansion to do indoor pictures since it was a november evening and my mom booked(without us, btw) the hall that had no venue to do pictures in the evening other than a dividing screen. My mom had an absolute fit that we changed the mass to a ceremony since it would mean going from an hour event to 20 mins. But we had already made arrangements for a neighbor to be at our house with cold cut platters, cheese and veggie plates that I catered for guests as well as light beverages. We lived at that house for over 20 yrs and were very close with several neighbours who left my wedding ceremony a few minutes early to attend the house.(Church was only 5 minutes from my house) So my relatives and friends who travelled were welcome to come and chat, eat and change prior to the reception and it worked fine. (other than my mother)

My mom refused to come do the family pictures at the mansion so we did only the wedding party and she left my MIL at the church instead of driving her to my mother's house. We did a few family photos during the cocktail hour(which really bothered me since I made special attention to the food during this time- one of the few things I was allowed to do since my mother booked the hall all by herself.) My husband took her aside to let her know that she couldn't treat his mother like that and my mom told her friends. So as the evening progressed, one of her drunk friends punched my husband while I was changing to leave. Then there was an out and out fight that I walked into in the lobby. What a horror show. Marriage lasted less than a year because I figured out that the man I married was exactly like my mother and he's out of my life and she's barely in it.

My 2nd wedding was at the Disney Swan and it was mine in every way. there was an hour between the ceremony and the luncheon while dh & I did our photos but we had h'ors doerves and open bar tab for the guests and games for the kids.

 

[okeydokey]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

Really? I'm Catholic and have been to dozens of catholic wedding and not one has been on a Friday. We got married at 5:30, reception at 7.

 

[krcit]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

I'm 41 and have been to around 40 weddings. All but maybe 5 of them were on Sat afternoons with Sat evening receptions. Maybe it's a regional thing but around here it's very common. My own wedding was the latest afternoon Mass(2 pm) and my reception was at 7 pm. My MIL had people back to her house in between as did my mom. Most of my friends who lived locally went home to change between and the others went to a bar Honestly, it was such the norm that I never even gave it a second thought. Now if we're invited to a wedding and there is a big gap and it's far away, we usually just go to the reception.

 

[Dax]

I went to a family wedding once that had a gap...the wedding was in a beautiful church in Philadelphia(not the best of neighborhoods either)...when the ceremony was over, there was almost 4hr gap till the reception, which was taking place just over the river in NJ.

We were STARVING! So DH, myself, and quite a few family piled into a few cars, and went to get some Geno's cheesesteaks in S Philly. We drew quite a crowd as the men were in suits, the ladies dressed real nice...The guys at Geno's were super nice, and made sure to provide us with things to not get our clothes dirty..

When everyone else found out where we went, even the wedding party was jealous..LOL..but it was a great time.

 

[Handbag Lady]

Oh, no. Not me. I would TOTALLY bash the wedding couple for making me wait 4 hours with nothing to eat or drink or do.

 

[RUDisney]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

That's not typical of Catholic weddings around here. Most of them are on Saturday afternoon with an evening reception.

I wanted a typical, 3-day, Polish wedding. Rehearsal with dinner on Friday night. Wedding at noon on Saturday with people meeting at my parents' house between the wedding and 5:00 reception. That lasted until 10:00. Sunday meant brunch at my parents' house.

No one had to go to a bar between the wedding and reception. That's what my parents' house was for. That was the only time during the day that we could spend any time with our bridesmaids and groomsmen.

 

[epcotprincess]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

DH and I are Catholic and come from Catholic families. The tradition you're speaking of sounds regional; I've never been to a Friday wedding for anyone in my family or circle of friends.

Our wedding had a 90 minute gap from the end of the high nuptial mass until the start of the cocktail hour, with approximately a 20 minute travel time between the church and the reception site, so the actual "down time" was around an hour or so. Many people checked into the hotel during that time if they were staying, or just found something else to do. We had no control over it, as we chose the latest possible ceremony time and the earliest possible cocktail hour start time. Some people missed our ceremony by choice as a result, and that's ok, it was their choice and we respect that. We were simply happy to have them celebrate with us afterward.

I felt really bad about it initially, and it's unfortunate that there isn't much that can be done if you want a traditional Saturday Catholic wedding. In my case, most attendees of the wedding were Catholic themselves so they understood the situation. We had 350-ish people and everyone had a great time. People still tell me it was the best wedding they've ever been to, and that makes me feel very good because it was surely a lot of work!

 

[dimimi]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

Not where we live(midwest), the tradition with our Catholic wedding is Saturday, but the reception begins around 6 for dinner and dancing. We did our as late as we could, but that was around 2PM.

 

[Ciao Mickey]

And that's why Catholics traditionally marry on Friday night if they want an evening dinner reception. My wedding, like every other one in my large RC family, was at 7 pm on a Friday, with the reception immediately following. It was a 10 minute drive between the church and the reception venue, and the reception ended up starting at 8:15.

If you are Catholic and want to get married on Saturday, the traditional thing to do is to have a mid-afternoon light-food reception. It is unwillingness to go with Friday that is causing these weird gap-in-the-middle situations.

We got married in the Catholic Church at 4 p.m on a Saturday and our cocktail hour started at 6 p.m with the reception following at 7 p.m.

I've been to 2 Friday night weddings and the only reason the people had them on a Friday was because they couldn't get the Saturday or Sunday date that they wanted at the place they wanted.

 

[indimom]

I didn't read all the posts, but wanted to say that this is pretty typical where I live. The wedding is usually at 2 or 3 p.m. on a Saturday. And the reception dinner is at 6 or 7 p.m. Generally this is to allow for pictures after the ceremony.
That being said, most weddings I've been to (including my own) had some light snacks and drinks available at the hall for the people who went straight there. And we tried our best to make that gap as short as possible. I think ours was about 2.5 hours.
It can be boring, but usually it's a nice chance to visit and chat with family and friends you don't see often or to get to know the "other side of the family" so its not all awful.

 

[KiminChicago]

When my sister got married, her wedding Mass was also a late morning one. She called around to a lot of banquet halls and couldn't get an afternoon reception time. Since all of our extended family lives in IL and she was getting married in Michigan, she was really concerned that there was going to be a large time gap between the ceremony and the reception.

Since I had been up to Michigan several times to visit her, I knew that there were touristy type things to do in the area and I suggested that she could make up a list of things that people could check out while they were waiting for the reception to start. In the course of doing that, she came across a paddlewheel boat that did tours up and down the river. She called the operators and they told her that she could actually have her reception on the boat, and she could have it for the whole afternoon. So that's what we did -- after the ceremony, everyone headed over to the boat while the wedding party finished with pictures. Then, once everyone was on the boat, we cruised up and down the river for the reception. Apparently this boat also did dinner cruises, so they had the kitchen and bathroom facilities. Dinner was on the upper level and dancing was "down below." It was great! And, the reception ended early enough in the day that some of our relatives decided not to find a hotel room in MI and were able to drive back to IL that same day. Sometimes you just have to think outside the box.

 

[taylor1293]

Where I'm from, smallish town Illinois, a several hour gap is the norm. No biggie . Our wedding, however, was at 7:00 and reception at 8:00.

 

[DVCDan36]

Quite a few weddings I've been at over the last couple of years had a large gap like you described. It is much more common since most of my friends have their pictures between the two and they go out to a couple of local parks or areas to have them. They don't just have pictures at the church or reception.

Same thing with the few weddings that I attended with the lag between ceremony and reception. They spent a majority of the time taking pictures at various parks with the full wedding party. Took a long time to get these done before they could make it to the reception.

Each time I was coming from out of town and would go back to the hotel for some down time before the "fun" could begin. Of course, I was single without a family and didn't have to deal with children. I can only imagine trying to get them calmed down twice in one day.

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Almost everyone I know and every wedding I've been in has taken the majority of the pictures before the ceremony. I think that's a great way to do it, it allows the wedding party to also enjoy the cocktail hour.

If I'm not in the wedding and it's not a REALLY good friend/family member and there is a long time in between the ceremony and reception, I skip the ceremony and just go to the reception.

 

[TheDisneyGirl02]

I just got married in October. Our ceremony was at 2:30pm and lasted about 15-20 minutes. Our cocktail hour started across town at 4:30pm. However, because we had many guests who traveled from about an hour away, we had a pre-reception in the church social hall. Juice, chips and cookies were served. I never made it downstairs to see it though...we were upstairs taking pictures inside because it had rained (and snowed a little) that day.

We didn't want to inconvience our guests with too long of a time period between the ceremony and the reception, however I didn't want to have the pictures taken prior to the ceremony.

 

[LipglossAndLetdown]

A lot of the Saturday weddings are early around where I live because that's when the priests/churches will allow them. The family can't just tell their church that they want their ceremony at 4 or 5... most of my friends that married stated that they were told no later than 1 or 2 for their ceremonies. So unless the bride and groom want to have a reception at 3 in the afternoon, there is often a "lag" time.

Quite a few people around here often do have Friday weddings, because at some places they can get cheaper reception prices than on a Saturday. But I also think for those people that work weekday 9-5 jobs, Friday weddings are hard for them. Now a days, alot of people have jobs that work on weekends, at night, but it's still ingrained that weddings are Saturday affairs.