In Search of My Body....Not the One I ATE! Vol. 5: Goddesses are Always on Top!

[3DisneyKids]

Phew! What a long-a$$ day!

Got my swim in but not my run. Which is annoying, for sure. But I will just go tomorrow and then get an extra run in over the week-end. And tonight I get to add my core work back in! I am recording BL right now, so I will go watch it later and do core. And upper body. Tomorrow it is back to PT and a KILLER lower body workout.

Things with Karen went as well as could be expected. Thanks, Ronda, Kelly, Lisa and all for your words and empathy. It has been painful watching her go through this. And she totally fell apart today. But was fine when I left her.

Snowshoeing with Kel's class was a BLAST. And I have an amazing story to share, but will save it for another time. Anyway, got a mile in, so that is something. I take Cam's whole class tomorrow.

Our little "family party" tonight for Cammie went well. And it wasn't that I was going to deny myself anything. I was just worried about going whole hog. And it ended up being a non-issue, so that is great. However, I did eat too much at lunch with Karen. So I am over today, but not by too much.

Cammie was over-the-top happy all day. Fun to see. And she loved all of her presents, etc. She got RUNNING GEAR! Very exciting. She is starting to identify as a runner, so I really want her to embrace that. So I got her some real running clothes (wicking material, etc.). A couple of super cute outfits. And I gave her an iPod shuffle. She knows that daddy and I use our shuffles only for running. So she got it right away that it was for when she runs and she is ecstatic about it! So happy!

LisaV--thanks for your comments about the quilt. It is hanging in my office here. I look at it all day long. She's an incredible kid. And I try to be very careful about how I eat in front of the kids. Show them a healthy balance, etc. One rule all of our kids really get is to NOT clean your plate, but to stop eating when your tummy feels full. And all 3 of them actually get 5 servings of fruits/veggies per day. Often more.

Nancy--new toys! Love me some new exercise stuff!

Ronda--GREAT job with your run! And you sound just like me when I first started. I was like, "How am I doing this? I can't believe I just ran X far. And I LIKE it! And look forward to it!" It was so shocking to me for so long. It took me FOREVER to actually "get it" that I am a runner.

Steph--great job finding ways to get those walks in! Fake and bake, huh? Please be careful!

Ok, have to go back and try to remember the rest of what I wanted to comment on.

 

[3DisneyKids]

Sunny! Look at you with the Amish joke! Love it!

 

[goofyfan-12]

Sunny - welcome back... you have been missed.

Erika - sounds like you had a great day with the kids. I am glad that Karen is doing as well as can be expected right now. She certainly has a good friend in you.

Just got back from a quick cardio workout. Felt good, but now I am tired. I am working on a few things that need to get done and then I think I am going to veg for the rest of the night. I am going to need my rest becauseI get to start the file digging tomorrow - yeah... (not really).

Hope everyone is off doing some fun stuff tonight.
Paula

 

[3DisneyKids]

LisaV--since I know you will hound me until I answer. Karen and Wendy have 3 kids and this is part of the reason this is such a sticky mess. In fact, Karen's lawyer said that if Karen wanted, this could truly be a ground-breaking case in same-sex litigation if she wanted to go that route.

Karen is the biological mother of the first child (a boy, now 9). She had terrible complications when pregnant and he as born early (though perfectly healthy now) and she was told she should never carry again. They both almost died. And since they wanted another child, Wendy stepped up, although the intention had always been for Karen to carry both children. One of the benefits of both parents having a uterus, I guess! Anyway, they used the SAME donor, and Wendy ended up carrying the twins, now 5.5 years old (not planned, just what can happen with IVF). So, Karen is the bio mom of one, Wendy is the bio mom of the other two, and the kids are biologically half siblings. And they both have been hands-on parents from day on. They never differentiated between who was the "real" mom to which kids, etc. The kids call Karen "mommy" and Wendy "mom."

They are now sharing custody. Karen has the kids more since she doesn't work full time and Wendy does. But Wendy has them as much as her schedule will allow. And she is paying child support, so that is good. But she is not paying nearly the amount of child support she would have to pay if this had been a hetero marriage. And she is not paying Karen ANY alimony at all, which she certainly would have been forced to do had this been a hetero marriage.

And it is wrong for so many reasons. Way back before they had kids and Karen was working full time, they made the decision that they should put more money into Wendy's retirement fund since hers was better than what Karen had. So Karen stopped contributing to her own retirement plan and they doubled what they were putting into Wendy's. Fast forward to today, Karen has no retirement fund of her own and Wendy is not obligated to give Karen anything from her retirement fund. And she isn't going to. Not a dime. It is just sickening to see all of this go down this way.

This is just one example of how Karen is getting financially screwed. There are several others.

Ok, off to work.

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

Wow, that sucks for Karen. Glad you could be there for her today, even though you'll probably be hounded tomorrow.

Happy Birthday Cammie!!

I don't have much to say. I'm in tired zone. I actually fell asleep on my desk today.

It feels like early spring here. Up to 56. Crisp and sunny. Love it.

Ok, I'm going to go rest. Night all.

 

[adsrtw]

Last night on part 1 of BL, Jillian went off about her new black team at one point. She was saying things like "I don't care if you do the work or not. It's not like *I'M* the one with all the weight to lose. If you don't want to do it, don't. But when you get sent home it's your own fault". Totally agree with her.

I can certainly understand that everyone has different expectations for their workouts. When I'm at the gym, I'm there to WORK. My time is very precious to me, and if I spend it all chatting, lazing around, I'd never see any improvements. I'm definitely of the "work smarter, not harder" mindset these days.

But. We have this *friend* who is single, and works out of his home most of the time. For him, it is "social hour" when he goes to the gym. Now, I don't mind talking/listening sometimes if I'm on the bike or TM, but do not expect me to sit and do nothing while you blather away about some inane nonsense.

I've even been known to put my headphones on, with the music OFF just so he thinks I can't hear him.

Totally agree!


Sorry about the stress. I find that stress can do funky things with my weight, which makes it a vicious cycle. My new obsession? Water. Are you honestly drinking enough water? [/B][/COLOR]

No, I am not drinking enough water and honestly sometimes I don't even drink anything until lunch time. I know that is so bad for me. Water is my biggest hurdle.

 

[adsrtw]

LisaV--since I know you will hound me until I answer. Karen and Wendy have 3 kids and this is part of the reason this is such a sticky mess. In fact, Karen's lawyer said that if Karen wanted, this could truly be a ground-breaking case in same-sex litigation if she wanted to go that route.

Karen is the biological mother of the first child (a boy, now 9). She had terrible complications when pregnant and he as born early (though perfectly healthy now) and she was told she should never carry again. They both almost died. And since they wanted another child, Wendy stepped up, although the intention had always been for Karen to carry both children. One of the benefits of both parents having a uterus, I guess! Anyway, they used the SAME donor, and Wendy ended up carrying the twins, now 5.5 years old (not planned, just what can happen with IVF). So, Karen is the bio mom of one, Wendy is the bio mom of the other two, and the kids are biologically half siblings. And they both have been hands-on parents from day on. They never differentiated between who was the "real" mom to which kids, etc. The kids call Karen "mommy" and Wendy "mom."

They are now sharing custody. Karen has the kids more since she doesn't work full time and Wendy does. But Wendy has them as much as her schedule will allow. And she is paying child support, so that is good. But she is not paying nearly the amount of child support she would have to pay if this had been a hetero marriage. And she is not paying Karen ANY alimony at all, which she certainly would have been forced to do had this been a hetero marriage.

And it is wrong for so many reasons. Way back before they had kids and Karen was working full time, they made the decision that they should put more money into Wendy's retirement fund since hers was better than what Karen had. So Karen stopped contributing to her own retirement plan and they doubled what they were putting into Wendy's. Fast forward to today, Karen has no retirement fund of her own and Wendy is not obligated to give Karen anything from her retirement fund. And she isn't going to. Not a dime. It is just sickening to see all of this go down this way.

This is just one example of how Karen is getting financially screwed. There are several others.

Ok, off to work.

The financial part really does suck. Hugs to Karen. How are the kids handling this? As good as can be expected?

Hope Cammie has a great B-day!

 

[AKASnowWhite]

Ah, An indoor outhouse.

Isn't that an oxymoron?

Yeah, actually, my father said he remembered when they got electricity, when he was 4-years old. That was one outlet and one light fixture. Then, he was 13-years old before he lived in a house with a bathroom in it.

And you live where exactly?

This is just one example of how Karen is getting financially screwed. There are several others.

That just plain sucks.

No, I am not drinking enough water and honestly sometimes I don't even drink anything until lunch time. I know that is so bad for me. Water is my biggest hurdle.

It was mine too. I'm doing pretty well with it though. Tomorrow will be my true test. I have to work Thurs/Fri/Sat. I haven't tried drinking all this water on days that I work yet. Should be interesting....



Sunny - You can join my "Amish Girls" club. Be warned though. Our official uniform is a plain black dress. Cotton. Non-flattering. So not the "little black dress" we all yearn to wear.



Still tracking, still exercising, still drinking water, still avoiding alcohol, still "ON". I'll update my challenge stuff tomorrow.

 

[lisaviolet]

LisaV--since I know you will hound me until I answer.
.

Yes Erika. It's a dance. Curious. No answer. Curiousity grows. Too funny.

I'm thinking that's your dance with Karen. See I have no idea what really goes on. But I'm needy. So I kind of understand her although I'm not stalking any friend right now. You see needy grows when there is a retreat. And retreat is necessary when needy smothers. So round and round we go. One feels smothered. The other feels unstable. And no folks I'm not saying Erika produces needy. Just understanding the dance. Unfortunately. I'm sure I can place where my neediness came from but regardless it's there - unfortunately.

Erika, have you ever consdiered that she has a crush on you? Really. Attraction makes the best of us a little crazy.

Let me see who hasn't answered my curiousity lately? Lemme think. Then I'll bug the sh!t out of someone else.

 

[lisaviolet]

So sad with their situation.

So sad. The shock of it - her leaving so suddenly. Not the leaving per se. Life can get complicated. Just how she left. It's something. I'm sure it's like you had no power at all to be left like that. Powerless when someone doesn't include you in their sudden decision. Must make you question so much. Even good times sometimes. Sad all around. And then usually the person who left makes it about the other's limitations. (I hope this isn't the case here - just venting). Instead of owning some of their crap. Not acknowledging that we all have a side - a place in a relationship. It's two people.

Very early on I told my friend, whose husband left right after giving birth, do not let him fool you. He's fooling you. Do not let him do that. He's making this all about you. What you did. What you didn't do. He's trying to take your personal worth away instead of owning his sh!t. Do not let him do that. It's about him - his rumblings inside. And those rumblings which made him leave are his. All his. Separate from you. Did he have a right to feel this or that? Yes, of course. We all do. But not a right to make it about you. He could have come to you. Did you have things? (she'd tell me what she did) Of course you did - you're human. It's a relationship!!!!! We all do. But you didn't leave. He did. That's when we communicate - hash things out - go to therapy and decide to stay or leave. And I told her - you stayed - you wanted to fight for your marriage - to hear him - to hear his feelings. But he never spoke it. He simply left. Don't tell me it's all one sided. That's crap. Such crap. He also made it about "her". The other. She's this. She's that. You're not. Whatflippinever. I crushed those early. So she's strong and confident. Yeah whatflippinever. Strength and confidence yep strength and confidence make someone fllirt with a married man with a baby on the way and then at some point sleep with him. Whatflippinever. The lies that get told when one wants out or is angry or is sad. Can't just state your feelings or take responsbility for them. Put them on the one you're leaving.

Ok, vent over.

Oh boy.

 

[lisaviolet]

So lovely that Cammie had a great day. I hear you about food. I'm just sensitive. My best friend's mother was forever putting her food decisions/dieting/food thoughts on her kids and it really affected how they thought about food. I'm just really sensitive to it.

But I know Erika. I've heard you say even vegetarianism is a choice.

Ah the quilt. Might sound a little crazy but it still brings a tear and smile to my face to this day. Tear because a "wow" feeling comes. Still. Some of that is about Cammie and how speciall she is. And some of that is about your parenting and what that dedication produces. And some of that is about me. Whining in my heart about what I needed from a parent. (Love my parents). It just says so much about you and Jeff. Just does. It's so lovely Erika.

I loved hearing that you have it hanging. She must have put so much into it. So much.

 

[lisaviolet]

Okay, I'm so overly emotional tonight. Sleep.

 

[HockeyKat]

Checking in...

For the week, so far, on all targets but one. Food/carbs/cals, check. Water, check. Exercise, 3/5. Alcohol, well, I caved and had one mich ultra amber tonight. Long day. No tiara for me...

 

[SeptemberGirl]

Hi! Checking in. Why are you all so quiet today?

I just got home from playing Bunco. Soooo suburban mom of me. I got Bunco and they made me wear a tiara and took my picture. Nice women, didn't know anyone but my friend Kim. Very welcoming, though!

So, Cammie's birthday, Karen's saga...Lisa, emotional eating? Tell us more? Sunny, how is WW going? Nancy, Kelly, Paula, Kat, Roddy...news? Lisa Z? Lisa PR? Lyz, done with taxes! Steph, working. Stacey? Sarah??? Ronda's okay with the C25k. Did I miss anything else?

 

[princessrunner]

Good morning everyone. Sorry I have been MIA so long. Lots of reasons but mostly because I took a few days off work which means I avoid the computer entirely.

We got 18 inches of snow on Sunday into Monday and the kids got their vacation extended by a day. It was a lot of shoveling. The snow came off the roof and I could not see out my windows so I had to shovel that too. More snow to come, probably today, so more shoveling in store. We got in some skiing, snowmobiling and lots of field hockey and hockey during my absence. I was busy to say the least. Cleaned out a closet or two also.

I am still on track with everything, miles and eating. I weighed myself this morning and I am down another pound for the week. I am now 1 pound off my goal for the challenge originally and down to 6 pounds from my ultimate goal. Good news all around. I have 4 miles to put in today to get my 25 miles in this week, totally doable.

Sorry I am so far behind. I did read back and thanks to all who did miss me. I did not have internet on Monday at all and that would have been my check in day. After that, I just lost track. Our email accounts updated and I can no longer receive anything on my BlackBerry so that is another fix for tonight.

I hope everyone is doing well! I will try to stay caught up until Saturday. We are headed to Boston College for an afternoon/evening field hockey tourney, drive home, field hockey playoffs on Sunday and another snowstorm (yay). Lots of time on the road this weekend and very little on the computer. If I cannot fix my BlackBerry, I am really going to lose touch!!

Take care everyone!

 

[SunnyB1066]

Isn't that an oxymoron?



And you live where exactly?



That just plain sucks.



It was mine too. I'm doing pretty well with it though. Tomorrow will be my true test. I have to work Thurs/Fri/Sat. I haven't tried drinking all this water on days that I work yet. Should be interesting....



Sunny - You can join my "Amish Girls" club. Be warned though. Our official uniform is a plain black dress. Cotton. Non-flattering. So not the "little black dress" we all yearn to wear.



Still tracking, still exercising, still drinking water, still avoiding alcohol, still "ON". I'll update my challenge stuff tomorrow.

Nancy - I'll see if I can find a black dress. Do we at least get to wear cute shoes?

Tonight is my WW weigh in. I've been much better this week. No emtional eating, so I have high hopes for a loss.

It is 61 degrees here this morning, makes me think spring is right around the corner. Max (my dog) and I spent some time on the deck this morning it felt soooo good.

Hope everyone has a great day!

 

[BrcsDisneyPrncs]

Morning all - checking in for a minute before work!

Gym and tracking is going well, not looking forward to weigh in tomorrow as I am tired of being disappointed, but we will see!

E - it just breaks my heart about Karen

Everyone have a great day!!!!

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

LisaV. Whew. You had alot to say last night. I enjoyed reading your thoughts. Espically about your friend. I bet her ex just "loves" you! All that empowering you are giving her.

Liz - Bunko.

Kat - was the beer good at least?

LisaPR - glad you haven't turned blue from snow yet. Brrrr.

Dawn - you're in WDW. Ahh, I go there everyday.

Hi all.

I think I might go shopping today. Want to go to Columubus and meander thru Whole Foods. Going to be another beautiful day.

TTFN.

 

[3DisneyKids]

I woke up a wicked bout of S.A.D. (seasonal affective disorder). It is STILL cold and STILL gray and I am just DONE. I am unmotivated and cranky. So there.

I'll try to come back later when I can say something worthwhile. I plan to go for a good run today, like 5 miles. It has been SO long since I have done anything even close to a real run, so today's the day. I hope it will help.

 

[DisneyGalUK]

Hi all

Bunco? What is this?

So - my WW leader knows nothing about WW in the US Well I tried!

And I lost 2lb Very happy with myself today

Erika - Such a horrible situation. Shared Custody/Child Support is the huge issue for Nicola at the minute. She is paying the same as a married couple would, but not getting much time with the little one