I really need some advice from my fellow gays

[jjjmranch]

I am appalled that they even contacted you. I wouldn't do the interview at all. Your life is your life and none of their business. You were a minor and had no decision going to the "facility." As an adult, you can make that choice for yourself.

I was left handed as a toddler and my grandma thought that was the sign of the devil, so they kept switching my utensils and crayons to my right hand.

It doesn't work.

 

[HenryHall]

I am appalled that they even contacted you. I wouldn't do the interview at all. Your life is your life and none of their business. You were a minor and had no decision going to the "facility." As an adult, you can make that choice for yourself. ...

Well that is precisely the thing for you to tell.

That if you had been offered a choice you would not have let the Clarke damage you.

And how your adult sex life is confidential and their asking asking about it merely demonstrates their ongoing prurience.

And how you hope they have learned not to try to change the gendered behavior of children any more because it only damages.

 

[glenpreece]

I am still so conflicted, the more i think about it the madder i get and feel for those poor kids they are trying to "fix"

 

[glenpreece]

Henry I sent u a PM

 

[HenryHall]

Henry I sent u a PM

For whatever reason the system will not let me respond to your PM.

But the direct answer to your question is:

That is distinctly possible.
But I can't find the article you refer to so I don't know what the context might have been.

Oh, and Henry Hall is a nom-de-plume, a famous band leader from the 1950s.

 

[OrlandoMike]

For whatever reason the system will not let me respond to your PM.

I believe you need at least 10 posts to be able to PM.

 

[f86sabjf]

coming from a hetero sexual male . I would have to agree with Wally on this one and say .

HELL NO !!!!!!!!!!! none of there damn business. Run away while you still can

 

[glenpreece]

For whatever reason the system will not let me respond to your PM.

But the direct answer to your question is:

That is distinctly possible.
But I can't find the article you refer to so I don't know what the context might have been.

Oh, and Henry Hall is a nom-de-plume, a famous band leader from the 1950s.

oh lol

Anyways just to let everybody know after alot of thought and some furthur research I did go down and speak with them today. I expressed my concerns about some of their practices. Also as a gay man now how those "methods' could yes in theory "work" to make the child appear more masculine etc but they will be miserable and will most likely resent or even hate their parents. It's all well and good to try and get the child to play with boy toys etc while at school or with others to help them fit in but by no means should they be encouraging parents into forcing said activities at home. If the family can't accept it than the child will have more problems to deal with.

In a perfect world we wouldn't even need to worry about trying to fit in and we could all just be who we want to be but that's not going to happen anytime soon.

The woman I worked with today was very nice and we seemed to have a good rapport going but when Dr Zucker came in to visit me later on I got a distinct feelings of akwardness. I ndon't know if it's because he is "old school" and wants to "cure the gay" I honestly can't say but he didn't stay long and I made it quite apparent I was not enjoying our chat. Now Devita on the other hand, we spoke at length about being gay and she too agrees it's not something that can be "cured" nor should anyone try to do so. We got into nuture vs. nature and i believe that may have a link to your mannerisms, personality and such. But I told her i firmly believe I was born gay and making me play with boy toys, not watching Y&R etc was not going to change that.

Also that just because a boy likes dolls, princesses and playing dress up does not mean that he is going down the transgender path. I like all of those "girly" things and have no urge to become a woman. They should really be careful about labelling children with gender identifcation disorder because it could do more damage than good.

Anyways it was a very long and emotional day. I said it there and I will say it here I am happy being a gay man. I have no issues with that. I know who I am and always will be. Now the other stuff those are what get me down.


Thanks for listening everbody.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

And thank you for caring enough to put yourself through that.

 

[Crashdown]

Good for you for going. Walking through the 'grown up stuff' can be hard. It sounds like you were respectful too which is says even better things about you.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I am comming in late to this thread. I jsut want to say that you seem like a strong person. I doubt I would have the strenth to go in and have a conversation as you did with a anyone who worked for a place like that and put you through what they did as a child. I am so sorry for you and anyone else who peopel have tried to "cure" Actually, I am mostly angry with those doing the "curing" and the parents who seek it. I totally agree with you that boys can like traditionally femine items and it is not (or should not anyway be) a big deal if they do. I have never gotten that menataliy. You rarely hear it turned the other way around and hear parents expressing concerns that a girl likes masculine things. Odd how freaking out over girls doin non traditional things is now an antiquated notion but the flip side has persisted.

Anyway, I am really proud of you. It sounds like you did a good thing for yourself (not being intimidated about going in) AND let them know how you really feel. Maybe, just maybe, someone involved in "treatment" there will think twice about what they are doing because of your actions today.

 

[f86sabjf]

Im glad it worked out for you. I've always had troubles indentifying with my male counterparts as i have a very soft side to me. I get misunderstood quite frequently and I'm straight go figure..

 

[DouglasE]

I'm glad that you put a definitive end to that chapter of your life. I had a similar experience as a child. My parents took me to a psychiatrist to have me "fixed" at the age of 12. Thank goodness they sent me to someone reputable who understood that being gay is not a disorder. I can only recall him addressing the gay issue with one little question. I answered it and that was that. We worked on other things and it was a very brief but positive time of my life. So much so that for a brief period of time I considered being a psychologist or psychiatrist when I grew up.

After some 30 plus years I still haven't made up my mind what I will be when I grow up.

 

[glenpreece]

Good for you for going. Walking through the 'grown up stuff' can be hard. It sounds like you were respectful too which is says even better things about you.

Yes I feel that you can get more accomplished by being up front and respectful. Acting like a stark raving lunatic will get you nowhere.

 

[HenryHall]

Yes I feel that you can get more accomplished by being up front and respectful. Acting like a stark raving lunatic will get you nowhere.

Based on what you have said in the prior report of your visit you can expect that CAMH will claim you as a success and a justification, in part, for their continued funding.

They will say that CAMH's early, prompt and helpful intervention is what caused a good outcome (a gay adult) and avoided a bad outcome (a transgender adult). That without CAMH's intervention you were at risk of becoming transsexual.

That is what they will claim.

And they need ever more public funding to continue help parents to take Barbies away from effeminate boys. And to make the boys (like the kid in the NPR program) terrified by everything pink. Not to mention treating these kids in the same office as serial rapists sent there by the courts to have their sex organs measured on Blanchard's machine.

So much for being respectful to monsters.

Good day to you all.

 

[hematite153]

I'm glad you were able to deal with the situation in a respectful manner.

I do think that there's likely something to the suggestions to write to your MPP and other organizations to make it clear that you do not support having public funding go towards this "therapy". I'll do some of my own research and consider my own letter too.