I have to vent! Preschool Halloween parties!

[luvsJack]

Honestly, as a parent you can't win these days! There are so many "rules" you have to follow.

NO nuts
NO cupcakes
NO homemade treats
NO unpackaged treats
NO messy snacks
NO dairy
NO gluten
NO dirt and gummi worms

Give us a break! Every school has different and multiple rules!

Yes, I don't know about taking care of 12 little kids, I just know what my one kid likes. Tell us what you want us to bring. We always had a sign up sheet and it seemed to work fine.

I think the other issue is if there are 12 kids then there needs to be 12 items so everyone can bring something, not just the three first parents who sign up. They can bring plates, napkins, water bottles, etc. At this age lots of parents are willing to participate not just a few (like in older grades). So take advantage of it.

And it's a PARTY! Who wants a party with just pretzels and fruit?

Exactly! We had pretzels and fruit every day--they wanted some CHOCOLATE!

 

[RainbowBrite]

And for the poster who said they let their toddler eat whole grapes because they can handle it....there is no such thing as a toddler who can handle a whole grape if it gets sucked down their windpipe. The issue is not whether a child can handle a certain food...it is the type of food. It is the shape of grapes and hot dogs that is the problem. If a grape gets down the tiny windpipe of a young child, it is not coming out regardless of what you do. If they choke on a goldfish, you can probably get that up. But not a grape. Maybe I am just sensitive to this because I have a neighbor who watched helplessly as her three year old daughter choked to death on a whole grape in the backseat of their car. A three year old who had always "handled" whole grapes just fine until that day.

I think you mean me. She's not my child, but one of the two children I nanny for. Her mother was the one who told me she will only eat grapes whole. I give her one at a time, sit right there and only let her bite into it - the whole thing does not go in her mouth at any point and she knows not to do that.

ETA: I know what it's like to watch a child choke. Another teacher allowed a 15 month old to have a marker cap and she started choking - thank goodness she was fine. I personally don't like letting her have whole grapes.

 

[jrmasm]

There was a sign up sheet that asked for ONE parent to bring a sweet. One parent signed up to bring the sweet. Two parents saw that someone else had signed up and said "Oh, I'll bring something anyway." To me, that's not helpful. The fact that they probably weren't deliberately trying to tick her off is irrelevant - they didn't use common sense. If their 2-yr-olds followed directions so poorly, they'd probably get a time out!

No, it's not. People's motives are always relevant. The list needs to say 'no addional donations needed' or people are going to bring in extra stuff.

 

[Sgt Mickey]

My kids don't have many parties anymore but basicallyw hen they do teh teacher sends home a slip saying the class is having a party on such and such date we need applce slices (or what ever is needed) BUT I think giving one or two options will elminate problems in the futire like this.
YES they are adults and should be able to follow direction but as can you can sometime us adults need guindance too

 

[Toot Sweet]

I'm a Kindergarten Teacher, but I also used to teach Pre-K. I always put up a sign-up sheet, listing specific items; there are always parents bringing in things that are not on the list.

I don't see a problem with it. I'm always very grateful that we have so many parents wanting to help. Do we need all the junk food? Not particularly. But parents like to feel like they are contributing to the class, and it's important that they feel that connection to school.

Messes happen. It's part of our job...particularly when you work with two-year-olds.

 

[surfgirl]

this thread is enlightening. thank you all for sharing.

My pet peeve (and somewhat OT)... people who buy store-bought cupcakes to send in for their kid's birthday. I'm sure someone will come on here and tell me how great they are, but here are my reasons:
1) store-bought cupcakes stink. Teachers hate them, kids just lick off the frosting, they are a pain to clean up. (and oh yeah, they're not very good)
2) If you want to bring cupcakes, make them. It is once a year. You can't make something once a year ? I understand we work, we have other kids, obligations, etc. Plan for that... we all know our kid's birthdays.

I personally advocate for other treats... Dunkin' donuts munchkins are much better than store bought cupcakes. We make the age in a roll-out sugar cookie that the kid is turning and bake them on a stick and then a little bit of powdered sugar icing. cute, appropriate, and kids love them. I've had teachers ask me where I got the cookie cutter b/c their kid wants the same thing.

(in full disclosure, my friend gave me the idea)

 

[RadioFanatic]

this thread is enlightening. thank you all for sharing.

My pet peeve (and somewhat OT)... people who buy store-bought cupcakes to send in for their kid's birthday. I'm sure someone will come on here and tell me how great they are, but here are my reasons:
1) store-bought cupcakes stink. Teachers hate them, kids just lick off the frosting, they are a pain to clean up. (and oh yeah, they're not very good)
2) If you want to bring cupcakes, make them. It is once a year. You can't make something once a year ? I understand we work, we have other kids, obligations, etc. Plan for that... we all know our kid's birthdays.

I personally advocate for other treats... Dunkin' donuts munchkins are much better than store bought cupcakes. We make the age in a roll-out sugar cookie that the kid is turning and bake them on a stick and then a little bit of powdered sugar icing. cute, appropriate, and kids love them. I've had teachers ask me where I got the cookie cutter b/c their kid wants the same thing.

(in full disclosure, my friend gave me the idea)

I would love to; however, home made goodies are not allowed. We are also not allowed to bring in DD bc they cook with peanuts.

 

[marcyinPA]

I bet OP doesn't have children of her own yet.

????

OP here...I have two children, as a matter of fact. They are 15 and 11.

Dirt cups AND chocolate cookies, from the same parent, for a small party? REALLY? It wasn't so much the dirt cups being an issue, but the gummy worms were a bit over the top as far as what 2 year olds should be eating. The dirt cups were A MESS though. Halfway through them eating them, I was wishing for cupcakes! They would have been less messy! In all seriousness, though...I do understand the cuteness factor of the treats...but they were not practical for a class of toddlers. A dessert for home, yes. School...eh, not so much. Just my opinion, which apparently not many others here share.


And yes, kids wash up great...but have you ever tried to wash up that many kids and maintain control of the classroom AND get them ready to go home?

Seriously, folks, I have nothing against a sweet snack. (which is why we requested ONE sweet snack...we received 3). Next time I will specifically say "cookies". But in five years, we've only had one other time that the snack was "over the top" for a 2 year old. I didn't anticipate an issue, so I didn't plan for one. Now I know better.

As for sending the cookies back home being a slap in the face...sorry, but those cookies were from the dirt cup mom. We ate one of her snacks. I didn't have baggies, and even if I had them, I would have never had time to package them up. She didn't follow directions, regardless of how good her intentions were. I don't see how I'm wrong here. I wasn't mean about returning them...I just said that we had so much that we weren't able to eat them. Grandma seemed offended...who knows what mom felt....she wasn't there.

Far worse than the mess though is the food safety issue, which to me is common sense, but it is obvious that I will have to educate parents from now on.

 

[MnMomtoboys]

I'll admit to not reading the whole thread but the simpliest solution to this whole mess is to either have a sign up sheet detailing exactly what to bring or asking for money. You could either do the shopping or ask a parent you can trust to do that for you.

 

[Toot Sweet]

I don't send my extra treats back home, for fear of offending someone and making them feel like their contribution was not appreciated. I take it to the teacher's lounge.

 

[Mkrop]

this thread is enlightening. thank you all for sharing.

My pet peeve (and somewhat OT)... people who buy store-bought cupcakes to send in for their kid's birthday. I'm sure someone will come on here and tell me how great they are, but here are my reasons:
1) store-bought cupcakes stink. Teachers hate them, kids just lick off the frosting, they are a pain to clean up. (and oh yeah, they're not very good)
2) If you want to bring cupcakes, make them. It is once a year. You can't make something once a year ? I understand we work, we have other kids, obligations, etc. Plan for that... we all know our kid's birthdays.

I personally advocate for other treats... Dunkin' donuts munchkins are much better than store bought cupcakes. We make the age in a roll-out sugar cookie that the kid is turning and bake them on a stick and then a little bit of powdered sugar icing. cute, appropriate, and kids love them. I've had teachers ask me where I got the cookie cutter b/c their kid wants the same thing.

(in full disclosure, my friend gave me the idea)

You know what that is great that you like to bake and have the time. Not everyone does.

Baking is not my thing, I can be creative other ways but if it involves baking I will and have messed it up.

Maybe you dont have decent bakeries where you live but we have several and one of our supermarkets does an awesome job.

Just recently at the last minute I found out that as Homeroom mom that I needed 42 cupcakes to celebrate the teacher's bday, I had no time to make them, I called up the supermarket above, and they were a huge hit. DS13 is very picky and he said they were some of the best cupcakes he has ever eaten. And the next day most of the 7th graders told me how good they were. Now I know if they werent I would have heard

Plus you have no idea if someone else's kitchen is clean at least with store bought you know.

So please if this is something you enjoy doing, go for it, but dont judge others bc they chose not too, that isnt fair.

 

[MnMomtoboys]

Toot sweet what are you holding in your hand?

 

[Toot Sweet]

Toot sweet what are you holding in your hand?

A big fat TARANTULA!

 

[HelenePA]

this thread is enlightening. thank you all for sharing.

My pet peeve (and somewhat OT)... people who buy store-bought cupcakes to send in for their kid's birthday. I'm sure someone will come on here and tell me how great they are, but here are my reasons:
1) store-bought cupcakes stink. Teachers hate them, kids just lick off the frosting, they are a pain to clean up. (and oh yeah, they're not very good)
2) If you want to bring cupcakes, make them. It is once a year. You can't make something once a year ? I understand we work, we have other kids, obligations, etc. Plan for that... we all know our kid's birthdays.

I personally advocate for other treats... Dunkin' donuts munchkins are much better than store bought cupcakes. We make the age in a roll-out sugar cookie that the kid is turning and bake them on a stick and then a little bit of powdered sugar icing. cute, appropriate, and kids love them. I've had teachers ask me where I got the cookie cutter b/c their kid wants the same thing.

(in full disclosure, my friend gave me the idea)

Nope sorry I can't make something once a year.. the kids will have to live with store bought. once a year times 3 classes is over 60 cupcakes For their christmas party I am ordering pizza I spent soooo much money on candy today I really think it would have been cheaper and easier to do this.

ETA yes I do let my 2 yr old eat whole grapes, and hotdogs on a bun that he just bites.. he's been doing this since, well forever. He's eating ice right now... he's had teeth since he was 2 months old.. yes 2 months and by 6 months he had 6 or 8

 

[luvsJack]

????

OP here...I have two children, as a matter of fact. They are 15 and 11.

Dirt cups AND chocolate cookies, from the same parent, for a small party? REALLY? It wasn't so much the dirt cups being an issue, but the gummy worms were a bit over the top as far as what 2 year olds should be eating. The dirt cups were A MESS though. Halfway through them eating them, I was wishing for cupcakes! They would have been less messy! In all seriousness, though...I do understand the cuteness factor of the treats...but they were not practical for a class of toddlers. A dessert for home, yes. School...eh, not so much. Just my opinion, which apparently not many others here share.


And yes, kids wash up great...but have you ever tried to wash up that many kids and maintain control of the classroom AND get them ready to go home?

Seriously, folks, I have nothing against a sweet snack. (which is why we requested ONE sweet snack...we received 3). Next time I will specifically say "cookies". But in five years, we've only had one other time that the snack was "over the top" for a 2 year old. I didn't anticipate an issue, so I didn't plan for one. Now I know better.

As for sending the cookies back home being a slap in the face...sorry, but those cookies were from the dirt cup mom. We ate one of her snacks. I didn't have baggies, and even if I had them, I would have never had time to package them up. She didn't follow directions, regardless of how good her intentions were. I don't see how I'm wrong here. I wasn't mean about returning them...I just said that we had so much that we weren't able to eat them. Grandma seemed offended...who knows what mom felt....she wasn't there.

Far worse than the mess though is the food safety issue, which to me is common sense, but it is obvious that I will have to educate parents from now on.

As a former preschool teacher, I just think you could relax a bit on some of it. Grapes? No, there is no way I would serve whole grapes or hot dogs or nuts or gum or hard candy. Some things HAVE to be on the "no" list.

I would suggest that you make your note for the next party so that every parent can participate in some way, thats all they want to do.

Let some of them sign up for "take home treats" and they can bring something already bagged to take home. Let some bring cups and napkins, one or two bring juice, maybe one or two can bring some "prize" type things for a Halloween game and others bring treats for the party. Have a sign up sheet with the same number of items as you have parents.

If extra is brought, keep something for the next day and have bags ready to send things home in. (I can't imagine a preschool with brown bags!! We used those little brown bags for everything under the sun and always had hundreds!! LOL). Don't your kids take naps? Couldn't you prepare the things to go home then?

I just think it would be a lot less stressful for you to make sure to be prepared for an overload of goodies and over-eager parents. Besides, I would think that your Director would appreciate you not alienating grandma by sending home those nice cookies she and her little grandchild made over the weekend.

 

[marcyinPA]

As a former preschool teacher, I just think you could relax a bit on some of it. Grapes? No, there is no way I would serve whole grapes or hot dogs or nuts or gum or hard candy. Some things HAVE to be on the "no" list.

I would suggest that you make your note for the next party so that every parent can participate in some way, thats all they want to do.

Let some of them sign up for "take home treats" and they can bring something already bagged to take home. Let some bring cups and napkins, one or two bring juice, maybe one or two can bring some "prize" type things for a Halloween game and others bring treats for the party. Have a sign up sheet with the same number of items as you have parents.

If extra is brought, keep something for the next day and have bags ready to send things home in. (I can't imagine a preschool with brown bags!! We used those little brown bags for everything under the sun and always had hundreds!! LOL). Don't your kids take naps? Couldn't you prepare the things to go home then?

I just think it would be a lot less stressful for you to make sure to be prepared for an overload of goodies and over-eager parents. Besides, I would think that your Director would appreciate you not alienating grandma by sending home those nice cookies she and her little grandchild made over the weekend.

No naps. This is preschool, not daycare. We have a 2 1/2 hour morning. Kids come one or two days a week.

We do have brown bags...we use them for crafts. I wouldn't have had time to bag them. It was a crazy morning.

Alienated grandma? Are you kidding? First of all, grandma and jr. didn't make them. Mom did. Second of all, we did eat one of the snacks jr. brought in. Mom was only asked to bring in ONE snack. She sent in TWO. Nice gesture, but more than we could use. I sounded appreciative, but we just couldn't eat everything. End of story.

 

[luvsJack]

this thread is enlightening. thank you all for sharing.

My pet peeve (and somewhat OT)... people who buy store-bought cupcakes to send in for their kid's birthday. I'm sure someone will come on here and tell me how great they are, but here are my reasons:
1) store-bought cupcakes stink. Teachers hate them, kids just lick off the frosting, they are a pain to clean up. (and oh yeah, they're not very good)
2) If you want to bring cupcakes, make them. It is once a year. You can't make something once a year ? I understand we work, we have other kids, obligations, etc. Plan for that... we all know our kid's birthdays.

I personally advocate for other treats... Dunkin' donuts munchkins are much better than store bought cupcakes. We make the age in a roll-out sugar cookie that the kid is turning and bake them on a stick and then a little bit of powdered sugar icing. cute, appropriate, and kids love them. I've had teachers ask me where I got the cookie cutter b/c their kid wants the same thing.

(in full disclosure, my friend gave me the idea)

I never particularly liked cupcakes at all, store bought or not. The children just would not eat them. Then for one party a very smart Mom brought mini cupcakes. She bought them at WalMart and they were chocolate with orange cream chees frosting--YUM! And just the right size for the kids. From then one we requested that they bring mini cupcakes (whether home baked or store bought).

 

[Magpie]

No naps. This is preschool, not daycare. We have a 2 1/2 hour morning. Kids come one or two days a week.

We do have brown bags...we use them for crafts. I wouldn't have had time to bag them. It was a crazy morning.

Alienated grandma? Are you kidding? First of all, grandma and jr. didn't make them. Mom did. Second of all, we did eat one of the snacks jr. brought in. Mom was only asked to bring in ONE snack. She sent in TWO. Nice gesture, but more than we could use. I sounded appreciative, but we just couldn't eat everything. End of story.

Maybe it's just that Grandma just didn't want them around the house. Goodness knows, I'm always trying to get rid of the junk this time of year. I would have sounded grumpy too, but only because I'm thinking, "Great. NOW what I am I going to do with them?"

When you've got hypoglycemics and diabetics in the family, you start looking at the Halloween treats with a lot less affection. It might not have had anything to do with her feeling like her daughter's present was rejected.

 

[Nancyg56]

You know what that is great that you like to bake and have the time. Not everyone does.



Plus you have no idea if someone else's kitchen is clean at least with store bought you know.

So please if this is something you enjoy doing, go for it, but dont judge others bc they chose not too, that isnt fair.

Exactly. I have stopped sneding homemade goodies for bake sales and buy a sealed cake or cookies at Costco. The package is sealed, the ingredients are on teh label and the date is right there. I have found that while some people are okay buying goods that they have no idea where they came from..............others are not. My goal is to raise money not to prove that I can bake a cookie.

this thread is enlightening. thank you all for sharing.

My pet peeve (and somewhat OT)... people who buy store-bought cupcakes to send in for their kid's birthday. I'm sure someone will come on here and tell me how great they are, but here are my reasons:
1) store-bought cupcakes stink. Teachers hate them, kids just lick off the frosting, they are a pain to clean up. (and oh yeah, they're not very good)
2) If you want to bring cupcakes, make them. It is once a year. You can't make something once a year ? I understand we work, we have other kids, obligations, etc. Plan for that... we all know our kid's birthdays.

I personally advocate for other treats... Dunkin' donuts munchkins are much better than store bought cupcakes. We make the age in a roll-out sugar cookie that the kid is turning and bake them on a stick and then a little bit of powdered sugar icing. cute, appropriate, and kids love them. I've had teachers ask me where I got the cookie cutter b/c their kid wants the same thing.

(in full disclosure, my friend gave me the idea)

See, you have determined that what you think is the only way to think. Honestly, it is simplistic to think that parties happen only one time a year, that a parent may have only one child and that homemade equals better.

I have eaten some of the dryest cupcakes and cookies at school functions. I have purchased some of the nastiest brownies at school bake sales. I think that if a parent goes out of their way to bring something to a party then it is all good. Honestly, in many schools you cannot even bring in homemade anymore because of the health issues.

I love to bake and when my children were in school I baked specially decorated holiday appropriate treats for each one for each holiday. I stopped and generally buy something special now The kids like the cupcakes from the store, cookies that are cute and one of the best things I sent in for a Christmas party was Little Debbie Christmas Tree cakes they could take home. The same amount of love Iut into making something formy children is stll there when I send something in for my DGD. What I left out was the allergy issues, the question about kitchen cleanliness and the time I would hav had to spend in teh kitchen. DGD is thrilled, hr classmates are happy and the teacher relieved.

There is no right way. Your way works for you but may not be the answer for everyone and certainlydoes not make you step above the others.

 

[luvsJack]

No naps. This is preschool, not daycare. We have a 2 1/2 hour morning. Kids come one or two days a week.

We do have brown bags...we use them for crafts. I wouldn't have had time to bag them. It was a crazy morning.

Alienated grandma? Are you kidding? First of all, grandma and jr. didn't make them. Mom did. Second of all, we did eat one of the snacks jr. brought in. Mom was only asked to bring in ONE snack. She sent in TWO. Nice gesture, but more than we could use. I sounded appreciative, but we just couldn't eat everything. End of story.

Oh, ok. A lot of preschools go all day, in fact many do here and they do include a nap time. One to two days a week for just a few hours here are usually labeled "mother's day out".

I didn't mean to offend you in any way. There is usually more than one way to do things, and it is some times helpful to see things from another perspective.

I have seen parents get offended by much less than a cookie not given out. And for that reason, found many creative ways to do as little offending as possible over unimportant things like spider cookies. Not a big enough deal to me to get my or anyone else's panties in a wad.