I am SO ANGRY - Girl Scouts Rant (LONG): UPDATE Pg.12

[jmskinner]

I am just totally appalled at how awful this troop leader has been. Then there is the poster who said there was a troop that was invitation only. Doesn't that go against the whole idea about scouting, it is for everyone.

I hope you and your DD have a great time for your mother/daughter weekend.

Please keep us updated.

 

[OceanAnnie]

Make sure you get the money that your daughter raised for the troop credited to her new troop. That might reduce the amount of money they have for this trip. Go back several years if you have to. Hit them in the pocketbook.

Ohhh. That's good! I like how you think!

 

[janette]

Make sure you get the money that your daughter raised for the troop credited to her new troop. That might reduce the amount of money they have for this trip. Go back several years if you have to. Hit them in the pocketbook.

Sounds good but this is against rules, the money stays with the troop if someone leaves they don't take anything. If the troop disbands any $$ follows those that remain in GS to their new troop, it is divided by all girls evenly. I've disbanded a troop before so somewhat familiar. Even with all the paper work filled out it took almost a year before my DDs new troop got the money.

 

[Ratpack]

As a former troop leader, Cookie and Brownie mother and all.....This "Leader" has totally misrepresented Girl Scouts. I can honestly assume that your DD took part in any fund raising events (cookie sale, etc.) - this is the $ used for all of these events, socials, etc. IF the GS did participate, even selling one box of cookies..she is authorized to participate in any of the special times. No girl should be excluded for not selling a set amount of $. So, my suggestion is to see how much $ is being spent on each girl for this one trip...and get a refund to spend on your own DD's trip. Then pull her out of this troop, the official year is almost over anyway...and call it a year.
SHE is really a poor excuse of a "LEADER"- I hope Council deals with her appropriately- it is obvious that she can NOT and should NOT be trusted with the troop money if it is not going to be divided fairly. Maybe she needs to read her leader handbook!!!

 

[sha_lyn]

OP... how do you get along with the other mothers in the troop?
Since you know for a fact that the leader is leaving, I would think about taking over the troop if I were you. That way she can not claim she just moved the troop and take the $$ with her. If your DD gets along well with the other girls I personally think this might be better than putting her in a new troop.

 

[becjlek]

Please keep us informed.

 

[cccm]

Definitely go to council. There can be no exclusions of children in any activity. If she wants her own private social club then she should leave girl scouts.

I like the idea of starting your own troop. I am becoming a co-leader this year. I love the troop we are in. Everyone is invited to every meeting including leader ones. They want the parents as involved as possible. We are on our second troop, left our first troop because one co-leader was saying very bad things about another.

A good idea is to do a weekly newsletter. Our co-leaders do this. No communication issues. They even make sure that the families of girls not there get a copy. Format is:

Date on Top
Girls for each of the next four weeks for snacks
What they have done this week
What they are doing next week.
If there are any council wide events occurring, $ and date/time.

 

[starrzone]

Don't get me wrong, my DD loves to shop till she drops as much as the next kid, but she LOVES being outdoors. She prefers reading Zoobooks to any other material, she watches Animal Planet and Discovery Kids more than she watches Nickelodeon and when she gets her time on the computer, instead of playing games, she goes to endangered species websites and reads up on all of her favorite animals.

I also feel bad for my DH; he is actually pretty good friends with the leaders DH and they get together once a month to play cards. Somehow, the DH isn't a Mr.Snottypockets and is very amicable but I guess we know how wears the Prada shoes in that family!

It sounds like your daughter is a wonderful young lady and that you and your husband are wonderful parents. Ignore the GS aspect for a moment- this situation could happen anywhere, any time and at any age, and it sounds like you are handling this perfectly by teaching your daughter to respect others, to stand up for what's right, and to ignore the "clique" aspect that seems to be permeating today's society. You definitely don't want to be around people like Ms. Snottypants and her child, but you also want to teach your own daughter how to handle people like this woman. Congtratulations for standing up for yourself, and I know we all wish that your daughter succeeds in all she does!

P.S.- your daughter sounds very much like I was at 11- "nerdy", quiet, not overly interested in fads, and very much into educational books and TV. That's the kind of person who succeeds- people who run all over others are only looked down upon.

starrzone

 

[sydally9367]

Reading all of your thoughtful words has really put a smile on my face; thank you all SO much for your advice and good thoughts I called my Mom today for Mothers Day and completely broke down again when I was telling her what happened..BOY WAS SHE MAD!!! She also suggested calling the council first thing in the morning and also agreed that an audit is a good idea; as most of you suggested, we have no idea if GS monies were used for other outings that we were not a part of. I will be calling the council again first thing in the morning and will begin to get the ball rolling; I will also be requesting an audit of all funds and will inquire about the money that is being used for this trip. When the leader responded to my email, she told me the GS going on the trip are free since they are using GS funds, but if I wanted to go, it would be an extra $65.00 plus $90.00 for the hotel since they would be "making" room for us (according to leader since we didn't respond in time, the free lodging isn't an option). My DD sold almost 300 boxes of cookies on her own this year, plus she participated in all 5 of the cookie booths they did; so I am assuming she is "due" something in return for all of her hard work since she won't be reaping the benefits of this particular trip (yes?).

Since the school year is coming to a close and there are only 3 more meetings, DD has decided not to attend the remaining meetings. The troop was in the midst of finishing 2 badges, so we will work on them together and I will inquire tomorrow morning about showing our work to someone at council and I will purchase the badges myself so that DD still gets credit for all the work she has done the past few months. I know quite a few of you mentioned having me make a troop and be a leader and this will definitely be something I consider whether we are here in Reno this coming year or somewhere else (we're a military family and due for a move in the next several months). DD was feeling much better this morning, although she is a bit apprehensive about going to school tomorrow but thankfully she is not in any classes with Snottypockets Jr. and has very minimal contact with her.

Thank you all again for your support and advice; I will definitely update tomorrow when I get finished talking this over with the council.

 

[mcco5543]

please DO keep us informed! We're with you all the way! .....Did you ever watch the movie "Troop Beverly Hills" about a beveryly hills girlscout troop, and how one mother who used to only care about shopping becomes a troop leader and finds out what's important in life, all the while there is a Leader Snotty Pockets who only cares about winning and being the best troop..The leader's name is VELDA this woman is exactly like her!

 

[RitaZ.]

When the leader responded to my email, she told me the GS going on the trip are free since they are using GS funds, but if I wanted to go, it would be an extra $65.00 plus $90.00 for the hotel since they would be "making" room for us (according to leader since we didn't respond in time, the free lodging isn't an option).

OMG! That wench must be slapped!

 

[DizBelle]

Some people are just disgusting.....

I shudder to think what kind of person Snottypockets Jr. is going to grow up to be.

 

[janette]

I will be calling the council again first thing in the morning and will begin to get the ball rolling; I will also be requesting an audit of all funds and will inquire about the money that is being used for this trip. When the leader responded to my email, she told me the GS going on the trip are free since they are using GS funds, but if I wanted to go, it would be an extra $65.00 plus $90.00 for the hotel since they would be "making" room for us (according to leader since we didn't respond in time, the free lodging isn't an option). My DD sold almost 300 boxes of cookies on her own this year, plus she participated in all 5 of the cookie booths they did; so I am assuming she is "due" something in return for all of her hard work since she won't be reaping the benefits of this particular trip (yes?).

Do share that with the council, hopefully the co-leader won't chicken out and will do the right thing finally. This group should never be allowed to be in GS; I just hope the council will take action and quickly.

 

[donnajon]

I would have to get passive-aggressive and call the hotel just to see how "booked for the weekend" they really are!
And just remember, Mrs. Snottypockets is raising another Paris Hilton. Just think about what these girls are going to be like in another 10 to 15 years!

 

[mytwotinks]

I think it is great that the co-leader is standing up for you, but I would let her know that you expect her to be honest about what has gone on in the past too. If she is truly sorry she will accept her fair share of the blame for what has happened. I think that if you are old enough to lead a troop, you need to be old enough to resist peer pressure!

I still think that the whole trip needs to be cancelled. All of the money needs to stay in the troop funds until you know exactly when and where all money has been spent.

I also don't really think it matters wether or not troop funds were spent on the "get togethers" that you dd was excluded from. I find it extremely inapropriate for the troop leader to take all but one girl someplace. The other moms should be ashamed that they allowed that to happen!

 

[Alicnwondrln]

something is off this with this leader I hope you call this a.m. and get to the bottom of this

 

[Alicnwondrln]

How could the other moms in troop not knwo you were being excluded
if they did this beofre what does say you didnt wanna come everytime ?
What poor judgement for an adult and to be so hurtful to child

 

[horseshowmom]

Mrs. Snottypockets is raising another Paris Hilton. Just think about what these girls are going to be like in another 10 to 15 years!

I enjoy reading psychologist John Rosemond in the Sunday paper. Yesterday's article talked about most people in his generation (he's 60) were raised to understand that they weren't the "biggest fish in the pond" and they weren't allowed to get "too big for their britches".

He said that unfortunately many of today's parents not only think that their child is the biggest fish in the pond, they also think their child is by far the most important fish. Which leads them to anti-social behavior.

I would say this woman and her child are prime examples of this behavior.

I agree with others that while the co-leader seems to be recognizing her fault in this, it's still shameful that she ever allowed it (however passively) to occur.

 

[agnes!]

I love the name 'Snottypockets'! Hahahahahaha !

Please keep us updated. I just now read all the posts and think this is better than any Soap Opera... Maybe you can call it "As the Snottypockets Turns"?

So, your action plan is:
Contact Council
*Ask for audit.
*Ask about funding. I think? depending on the troop level, sometimes funds raised stay with the troop, sometimes they stay with the girl, ie. when they were Brownies/Juniors in our old Troop, the monies stayed with the troop, but when the girls move up to Seniors/Cadet, the girls sometime raise funds over a couple of years, to go on a BIG trip & the girls actually sort of have "accounts" within the troop? (at least I think that's the way it works).
Contact your Service Unit Manager, notify them about the Troop Leader's behavior.
Contact hotel - ask if completely booked & FOR PRICES.
Check your Council's online event registration for details of your troop's registration as another poster suggested.
MAKE SURE that you do NOT allow this nasty heartless excuse for a pair of ovaries to TAKE any funds with her to a new troop. YOU should take over the troop WHERE it is .

Time to scorch the earth. I think you should ask your fellow DIS'ers to help...sounds like we are almost as much up in arms as you are!
agnes!

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

You are far to nice! I would be going after this woman to make the troop pay for my daughter to go on this trip.

And I would go to council until I got a proper response.