How upset would you be over this?

[Mermaid02]

Agree.

I can't wrap my brain around kids believing people in costumes are "real". My kids were always scared of the costumes and we steered clear from them.

My cousins kids are scared of Chuck E. Cheese (and they know it's a costume) and I don't blame them!

 

[RadioNate]

I agree that there is a big difference between the two. I think the best approach when a child asks if Santa (or whoever) is real is to turn it back on them and ask them what do they think. If they really want to keep believing they will rationalize their friends' responses in some way. If they are ready to let go they will. They don't feel forced to stop believing because you have just ruined the magic by confirming the rumor, but they do not feel pressured to remain "innocent" to keep their parents happy either (or feel that their parents lie to them).




Yes to this Presumably if they were discussing if characters were real it is because it is part of the third grade media sciences curriculum to learn too distinguish between fictional and non fictional chcarcters and stories. In that case, the teacher is doing her job. She is making sure ths kids understand. Perhaps the next standardized test will have a question about whether Cinderella is fiction or non fiction and if so these kids will get it right (well, all except for the ones whose parents undermined the lesson and told the their children the teacher was wrong and Cinderella is indeed real.)
OP--I don't think you are a bad person, or trying to undermine the teacher at all.
I think you were caught off gaurd and need to step back and think about this a little more clearly
Part of growing up IS learning how to distinguish between fantasty and reality. This is a very important skill to have. It is something most children should be able to do by third grade. It does not mean she will have lost all her childhood innocence overnight--or even that she will get any less pleasure out of WDW than she did before (I promise).

I agree and I obviously love the 'what do you think' response. I have a 3rd grader and I did ask him about this last night. He said it is fun to pretend but I quote "come on mom, they have plastic faces." He then informed me that his sister thinks that they are real. She'll be 2 in 10 days.

He knows about Santa, he asked me directly last year and I did the 'what do you think' response and he chose to believe another year. This year he informed me that he knew the truth.

None of this has ruined anything. He still likes to go to WDW and will still take character photos. He high-fives and will even give hugs. He'll still get presents from Santa and Easter baskets and Tooth Fairy money. He knows it is a fun way to celebrate the holidays or milestones.

I don't think this is on par with Santa at all. No one sees Santa.

The Disney characters are cartoons. They are obviously drawings. When they see the movies I don't know of any child over the age of 3 who thinks the drawn (or computer rendered as the case may be) talking cars or animals or even princesses are actual live beings. They don't really believe their toys come to life when they leave the room.

 

[luvmy3]

I doubt that it ever occurred to the librarian that some kids would think that fairy tale or Disney characters are real. Santa is a completely different thing IMO and I doubt that she would touch that one.

Never in a million years would it occur to me that a nine year old (or a child of any age, for that matter) would think that Disney characters are real. My kids knew from the get-go. So, it wouldn't upset me in the least.

ITA. Even from a very young age my kids have known that characters are just that, characters, and I have to admit I am shocked that a child that age would believe.

 

[wendy46001]

I doubt that it ever occurred to the librarian that some kids would think that fairy tale or Disney characters are real. Santa is a completely different thing IMO and I doubt that she would touch that one.

I'll agree, i think most non Disney loving adults would assume a 9 year old would know

Now if the Op said Muppets...that would be totally different

 

[Metsfan520]

I'm sure you are not in the minority at all on this. I am as big a Disney freak as anyone here. When I give Goofy a hug, that is Goofy, but really, it would have never occured to me that third graders would "believe" in Disney characters the way they believe in Santa or the tooth fairy. In all my years of reading and posting on the DIS, this is the first I can recall that people have been serious about believing the characters to be real. If this is news to me and other DISers on this thread, I don't see how the average non-Disney-freak can be expected to know about it.

IMO, this is nowhere near the same as telling a child that Santa isn't real. Santa and the Easter Bunny are widely known to be believed in by the majority of children in the U.S. Disney characters are not.

I would have also missed the hint that the kids "still believe", but would have gotten the hint that they don't understand the difference between fictional characters and real people.

I don't see the librarian's comments as "the pretty lady in Disney world is a fake", but as "the pretty lady in Disney World is playing the part of the fictional character of Cinderella."

I'm with you. I love Disney. When I'm at WDW, I'm so excited, I say "hi Mickey", etc. But I can never remember thinking that characters from an animated movie were real. I know my nieces & nephews don't, even the ones who have been to WDW multiple times. So I don't think the librarian was making a 9 yr old grow up too soon.

If this was my kid, it would be a non-issue for me.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Truthfully, all this aside I would be more concerned that my child was sobbing at 9 years old about realizing that that costumes were not really mutant animals from a fairy tale.
We all love the Disney magic. We go and have a ball with the characters. We talk to them and wave and get excited. However, I cannot fathom how any child over maybe age 5 really thinks that they are really are live animals.

I am sorry your child was crushed and I do believe that children should stay children as long as possible. I also think that Santa and the EB are a completely different situation. I personally would be concerned that she didn't catch on about Mickey Mouse by now.
Good luck.

 

[paintnolish]

my kids have never thought they were real, they know the characters at disney are just that, and it doesn't ruin the magic for them at all. now, if she had brought up santa, I would have been upset.

When they got to that toddler age where they were scared of characters, we told them- "It's just a person in a costume!" They still like getting photos and autographs, though. They laugh when I tell them they are real. It is a running joke with us. I act like I don't know what they are talking about!

 

[MarilIncredible]

Truthfully, all this aside I would be more concerned that my child was sobbing at 9 years old about realizing that that costumes were not really mutant animals from a fairy tale.
We all love the Disney magic. We go and have a ball with the characters. We talk to them and wave and get excited. However, I cannot fathom how any child over maybe age 5 really thinks that they are really are live animals.

I am sorry your child was crushed and I do believe that children should stay children as long as possible. I also think that Santa and the EB are a completely different situation. I personally would be concerned that she didn't catch on about Mickey Mouse by now.
Good luck.

ITA!

I am pretty certain I knew before I was 4 or 5 that Disney characters were nothing more than young perople in costumes. I mean, really, how realistic is a 5'6" mouse with a huge zipper running down his back? And, how can the princesses be at MK and at Epcot at the same exact time? Did she think it was life-like holograms or something?

I didn't make the jump to assuming Santa was not a real person until I was older, probably 9 or so. I think I kind of suspected it, but didn't allow my mind to go there until around that age.

 

[chisnpeke]

I never thought the Disney characters were real. I always knew they were people in costumes. I guess I find it hard to understand how a 9 year old could really think they are real people because I always knew characters dressed up at amusement parks were just people in a costume. But I was always told that also because I was scared of them.

I believed in Santa until I was 11 (5th grade). I'm glad I had it for as long as I did because Christmas wasn't the same after I found out he wasn't real. I was crushed when I found out about him.

 

[disykat]

I absolutely respect your decision to tell your kids the truth! I know some people who do that. I just think that this librarian should have respected the fact that some people let their kids believe.

How could she respect that "fact" if she had no idea people believed that? I'm with the group who had no idea people would be upset with the idea that characters are fictional until I found the DIS.

Understanding different genres of literature and separating fact/fiction and reality/fantasy is a huge part of language arts curriculum at that age. I bet if you ask the librarian she can show you state standards listing those as something she is required to teach.

Disney is successful because fantasy and using your imagination is FUN! That doesn't make characters real, even if it is magical to act as if they are.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Still not the librarians choice to make..

Not the librarian's responsibility to first poll each parent to discover what literary characters each child believes is and is not real.

 

[kaytieeldr]

All of the above posts are by the OP.. I see nothing that indicates this was any type of "literary" discussion or "instruction"..

Since the librarian likely has no knowledge of this conversation, there is absolutely NO way to determine in what context the accurate information was given.

By the way, Cinderella isn't even a Disney creation (in case some posters have forgotten). She's the lead character in a fairy tale that's at least a couple of hundred years old, and French.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Not the librarian's responsibility to first poll each parent to discover what literary characters each child believes is and is not real.

I agree. What if your kid believes in Pokemon or Chuck E. Cheese?

 

[Becky2005]

I agree. What if your kid believes in Pokemon or Chuck E. Cheese?

I was just going to say something along those lines, we live near Six Flags -- so based on this logic -- Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Sylvester, Marvin the Martian, I think we saw Wonder Woman there too (or at least she walked by), there were a bunch of Super Heros there and all the others that I'm surely missing.

Those would then all be off the "can't say those are fictional characters list".

Where is the line drawn at that even those these are fictional book stories, I have to imply they are non-fiction?

 

[Mermaid02]

I agree. What if your kid believes in Pokemon or Chuck E. Cheese?

If Chuck E. Cheese were real I'd invest in D-Con........... he is one nasty looking rodent!

Maybe the 9 year old in question was testing Mom?

 

[Sanchez]

Disney is about dreams, wishes and imagination. While you are there you enter the fairy tale. This is what Disney promotes. They do not promote that the characters are real life Mickeys, Donalds and Cinderellas. Why would you, as a parent, promote something that even Disney does not?

While the OP certainly has a right to be upset, support of that position is unrealistic and illogical. To those of you blaming the teacher, consider that it is not the teacher's obligation to perpetuate the fraud that you have crafted. Further, no one here (including the OP) knows the context in which the subject was discussed.

Teachers cannot win - especially on the DIS. There was thread about the definition of "snowflakes" on the CB. To those of you who would be "upset" or "livid" about something like this, I suggest that you are exhibit A.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

If Chuck E. Cheese were real I'd invest in D-Con........... he is one nasty looking rodent!
Maybe the 9 year old in question was testing Mom?

You're not kidding. That is the creepiest looking costume I have ever seen. Who in their right mind thought that would be a good mascot for a company? It looks worse than the rats in the city.
Gross!

 

[Becky2005]

You're not kidding. That is the creepiest looking costume I have ever seen. Who in their right mind thought that would be a good mascot for a company? It looks worse than the rats in the city.
Gross!

My daughter who loves any character even as a teenager, she will go along with it -- calls him an evil rat. She does NOT like him (of course, she doesn't like clowns either...hmmm...). She has convinced my 6 year old that he is EVIL too. Therefore, my conclusion is there has to be just something "not right" about that costume. My DD even loves the Villians but will go out of her way to avoid "the evil rat" as she calls him.

 

[taximomfor4]

If Chuck E. Cheese were real I'd invest in D-Con........... he is one nasty looking rodent!

Maybe the 9 year old in question was testing Mom?

I was totally thinking the same thing. My 16yo dd told me several YEARS after she stopped believing in Santa that she didn't want to let me know the SHE knew the truth. Perhaps, knowing mom loves disney, this 9yo was playing along. My kids all went to WDW young. MAYBE my youngest believed the characters were real on her first trip (2 1/2 yrs old). We've never told her they were real, or they weren't...but she did mention at 3 1/2 that MEEKO in the movie is a little raccoon, but the person DRESSED as Meeko at WDW is person-sized. I think they figure out out really, really young. OH -- and we'd seen Belle at the storybook thing...then the next day, got her autograph in Toontown. DD (remember, 3 1/2 at the time) said right to Belle "You're pretty. You look more like Belle in the movies then the Belle we saw by the castle."

About the curriculum in 3rd grade...I was at several IEP meetings when dd11 was in 3rd grade. HUGE that year were discussions about fiction and non-fiction, like many pp mentioned. State Standards dictate what each year's curriculum must include, so I bet that is pretty standard. Any child that still believed fictional Storybook, Movie,or TV characters were real upon entering 3rd grade is going to come out of 3rd grade a little more enlightened. Think of it this way...if the librarian had only mentioned Spiderman, Bart Simpson, Junie B. Jones, and Barney, the kids STILL would have realized the princesses, adults in other big animal costumes, and other cartoon characters were also NOT real.

Since you now know that 3rd grade curriculum pushes the fiction/nonfiction lesson, OP, I would just let this go. THere was no way for the libarian/teacher/whatever to teach this year without your dd learning those characters were fake.

 

[ICF]

Rachael said "does that mean Santa too?" she was sobbing. I told her "Of course not!"

Flame away, but if my 9 year old asked me that question directly i would NOT lie to her about.

Our son came to us about 6 weeks ago with that question, since his friend and him "did the math" (his term) and didn't see how it was possible.

Given that he is 9, we didn't want to lie to him and then turn around in a year or 2 and tell the 'truth'

I might 'lie' to a 5 year old, but by the time they are 9, I wouldn't keep it going if asked directly.