How upset would you be over this?

[ginna74]

I wouldn't be upset, my kids have never thought dis characters were real just as they didn't think the saturday cartoon lineup characters weren't real. The easter bunny, santa claus and the like sure to a very young age (kids talk even in kinderguarden). I guess she prob didn't think nothing of it due to the childs age and how ... she probably never heard of a child believing it so she didn't think nothing of it. Probably wasn't a concious (sp?) thing. Maybe if again it were the easter bunny I am sure she would have thought about it. I have never heard of believing that too..

 

[princess momma]

I feel sorry for teachers. It seems like they're darned if they do, and they're darned if they don't.

Should teachers pretend Harry Potter is real? I'm sure there are some kids that believe in Harry Potter.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

That's a toughy, but since the librarian was using Mickey mouse--if it was a lesson on fiction vs. nonfiction--there are so many other characters she could have used.

I can't say that by 3rd grade I didn't already know that the big mouse wasn't a rodent or that I hadn't figured out Santa Claus. I was living in Pennsylvania at the time and it seemed my instructors and librarians were quite capable of teaching us our lessons without disrupting our fantasy of Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy and the Disney characters.

That age is a gray area for what children know and what children don't know as they learn to separate fantasy from reality...or fiction versus non-fiction. I feel that the librarian should have been sensitive to the age group and figured out another way to teach the lesson if there were a lesson.

Out of the entire scope of literature, she could only teach the lesson by outing Cinderella and Mickey?

 

[Bluestars]

I think most people would assume a 9 yr old would know characters dressed up in costumes are not real. I have a feeling it never occurred to the librarian to think otherwise. Most people play along with Santa, but I don't think most people play along that people dressed as characters in costumes are real. Maybe I am in the minority thinking this way though.

As far as my own kids, I never told them the characters were real. We went to Disney and had fun and enjoyed the characters.

 

[C.Ann]

Well, I'm going against the grain. I would be upset.

They only 'believe' (be it Santa, The Easter Bunny, or Disney characters) for so long. You sure don't need (or expect!) an adult to ruin it.

Yes - OP, I'd be upset.

I agree.. Your kid - your choice as to what you want them to know and when.. Other people should keep their noses out of it..

I just don't get why people are in such a rush to force kids to "grow up" and take everything "magical" away from them.. Childhood is short enough - why make it even shorter?

Maybe some folks should listen to the song, "Let Them Be Little"..

 

[RadioNate]

There is a difference between letting child believe and lying to their face when they ask you the truth.

I wouldn't be upset because it wouldn't occur to me that a 9 year od would think costumed characters are real. A cartoon mouse or princess? I can maybe understand something live action but a beast or something like that? No.

I think my DS told me they were dressed up people when he was 5. He is 8 now and still enjoys the magic and interacts with the characters as if they were real but he definately knows the truth.

 

[hereyago]

There is a difference between letting child believe and lying to their face when they ask you the truth.

Another thing I don't get. The parents who tell kids if they don't believe in Santa or the Easter bunny, they won't get stuff. Really? So, they want to help perpetuate a big lie, then threaten the kids about not believing in something that doesn't physically exist.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Another thing I don't get. The parents who tell kids if they don't believe in Santa or the Easter bunny, they won't get stuff. Really? So, they want to help perpetuate a big lie, then threaten the kids about not believing in something that doesn't physically exist.

Not all parents who allow the belief to exist threaten their children with the belief.

I personally think it would be mean to do that.

I will not allow a child who figures it out and wants to spoil it for younger siblings. They can help in the magic if they want. I don't even use "From Santa" gift tags. But the "santa" gifts are just wrapped in a unique way. They don't say "from santa" though.

 

[C.Ann]

There is a difference between letting child believe and lying to their face when they ask you the truth..

Still not the librarians choice to make..

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

There is a difference between letting child believe and lying to their face when they ask you the truth.

I don't believe we have the context of the situation.

Thus far, the only logical explanation absent the truth is that the librarian might have been explaining fiction vs. nonfiction. IF that were the case, it could have been achieved in other ways.

 

[Bluestars]

I don't even use "From Santa" gift tags. But the "santa" gifts are just wrapped in a unique way. They don't say "from santa" though.

Same here. We have never put From Santa tags on gifts. We just wrap the gifts in Santa Wrap. The kids don't really care who the gifts are from any way. The only time we acknowledge who it's from is when it's from a family member who needs to be thanked with a thank you card.

When they were older and asked if Santa was real, I would tell them that it was something they needed to decide for themselves. Then they would ask what I thought and I would tell them that it didn't matter what anyone else thought, including me, the choice to believe was up to them.

 

[Handbag Lady]

My DD who just turned 9 yesterday and who is in 3rd grade, came home from school in tears. It seems the librarian told them that Cinderella and MIckey Mouse and all of the Disney people are not real!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know Rachael is old to still "believe" but she did! Our next trip is 21 days away and she just got a new Snow White dress to wear!

I told her that they were real and the librarian probably meant that we could go into the library and search Cinderella and find 10 different versions. I reminded Rachael that they are fake everything out there.

I am so mad, I thought we at least had another year of believing!Oh and Rachael said "does that mean Santa too?" she was sobbing. I told her "Of course not!"

I don't like to broadcast this on the Disboards, but I work at the Walt Disney Studios in Burbank.

Please tell your daughter that I just saw Mickey Mouse on Friday practicing for the Princess and the Frog screenings we have coming up soon. He was going over how he is going to greet all of the families we have coming onto our studio lot in the next few weeks.

He indeed is very real and would be most upset at this "educator" in our midst.

 

[belledreamer]

I think I'd be angry. Not at her stating the fact, because she is right. But I don't think it would be right for some librarian to tell a child that Mickey and Cinderella aren't real. For her to tell that to a child that is no relation to her, I believe is quite rude and none of her business...

I mean, sure we know it's a regular person in that Mickey suit or that Cinderella dress; but I'm 22 and I still like to let myself believe it's real for a moment while I'm at Disney World.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

Still not the librarians choice to make..

So where does the librarian draw the line? This is 3rd grade, not kindergarten.

Op, no I would not be upset at all. Established, western world beliefs such as Santa, I would expect the librarian to uphold the secret just in case. But not fairy tales or cartoon characters or characters in fictional children's literature.

By 9 years old, children are intelligent enough to start really exploring literature in depth. They start learning the differences between short stories and novels, fiction and non-fiction. Mysteries and fairy tales.

Now back to my response to C.Ann.

Where does the librarian draw the line? How about Johnny who believes that transformers are real? Or Stevie who believes that Luke Skywalker is real? Or how about the Universal fanatics? Does that mean the librarian cannot discuss the Cat in the Hat or the Grinch without revealing that they are fictional characters? How about Spiderman, Hulk, Popeye, Scooby Do, Dora, The Simpsons and Spongebob, all characters at Universal that some child may believe are real?

How about Harry Potter? Should the librarian pretend that the wizarding world is real just in case some family allows their child to believe that Hogwarts is a real place? That would go over well with some families where HP goes against their religious beliefs

What fictional children's literature is it ok to discuss that the characters are actually fictional by 3rd grade?

 

[MiniGirl]

I don't believe we have the context of the situation.

Thus far, the only logical explanation absent the truth is that the librarian might have been explaining fiction vs. nonfiction. IF that were the case, it could have been achieved in other ways.

I believe what the poster you quoted was referring to was what the OP told her child when her child asked if they were real -- not what the librarian said.

Seriously, though, the conversations and the raw emotions they seem to stir up always intrigue me. I really can't believe how angry some of you seem to get about this. I'm sure the librarian's intent was not to crush the child's spirit. I'm sure it just never occurred to her that a child that old still believed those characters were real.

Also, as many others have stated, knowing what is fiction and what is real doesn't mean the magic of childhood is over. We never pretended any of them were real -- even Santa and/or the Easter bunny. Yet somehow my girls have always managed to enjoy the magic of those seasons. Now, before any of you chastise me, I always tell them every year that it is a secret and not to tell other children, and they don't.

And to Handbag Lady..... I, too, work for Disney (WDW), so I do understand what you mean about Mickey being real. However, I think it is unfair to put the term educator in quotes the way you did -- as if this librarian is somehow not a real educator just because she said Mickey and Cinderella are not real.

 

[C.Ann]

My DD who just turned 9 yesterday and who is in 3rd grade, came home from school in tears. It seems the librarian told them that Cinderella and MIckey Mouse and all of the Disney people are not real!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know Rachael is old to still "believe" but she did! Our next trip is 21 days away and she just got a new Snow White dress to wear!

I told her that they were real and the librarian probably meant that we could go into the library and search Cinderella and find 10 different versions. I reminded Rachael that they are fake everything out there.

I am so mad, I thought we at least had another year of believing!Oh and Rachael said "does that mean Santa too?" she was sobbing. I told her "Of course not!"

OP here...

she is not the only kid in her class that still belives in Disney characters and I know she is old, but I just dont think an adult should be telling them that.
Rachael knows that the lady at Perkins is pretending to be Cinderella. She gets that people pretend, BUT she truly still thinks that when you go to Disney, that the Cinderella you see is indeed the real one. I kind of thought she knew about Mickey, guess not.
But this has all made her doubt Santa now.
Like others have said...I am happy we are going so soon so she can get caught up in the magic! I should get Cinderella to sign an autograph for the librarian "I am REAL!!"

I absolutely respect your decision to tell your kids the truth! I know some people who do that. I just think that this librarian should have respected the fact that some people let their kids believe.

All of the above posts are by the OP.. I see nothing that indicates this was any type of "literary" discussion or "instruction"..

Now back to my response to C.Ann.

What fictional children's literature is it ok to discuss that the characters are actually fictional by 3rd grade?

 

[Va-bear]

I think a child should be able to believe for as long as they want. Since she clearly showed she wasn't ready to accept the truth, I dont think I did anything wrong with telling her they are real.

A relative stranger told a 9 year old a truth and you lied to her.
You are teaching her to believe others over you.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

All of the above posts are by the OP.. I see nothing that indicates this was any type of "literary" discussion or "instruction"..

Just by the sheer fact that it was the librarian, whose job it is to teach literature, would make one tend to believe that this discussion was brought up during a discussion on books.

Children usually only see the librarian once a week for a short time and during that time there is usually a literary portion and then time to go select a book. Perhaps the librarian is a mean old curmudgeon who just happened to blurt out that Disney characters weren't real completely out of the blue, but somehow I seriously doubt that.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

So where does the librarian draw the line? This is 3rd grade, not kindergarten.

***********

What fictional children's literature is it ok to discuss that the characters are actually fictional by 3rd grade?

Are you suggesting that the only way to teach literature is to use stories based on cartoon characters?

There is tons out there to teach the various literary elements at a young age without "going there".

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I believe what the poster you quoted was referring to was what the OP told her child when her child asked if they were real -- not what the librarian said.

Seriously, though, the conversations and the raw emotions they seem to stir up always intrigue me. I really can't believe how angry some of you seem to get about this. I'm sure the librarian's intent was not to crush the child's spirit. I'm sure it just never occurred to her that a child that old still believed those characters were real.

I'm not angry. But somehow in elementary school, children's literature extended beyond cartoon characters.

So I don't see why the librarian needed to say what she said--even in the context of a lesson.

We do not know if a child asked the question. I wouldn't expect her to lie if asked. But a little discretion and a wider selection of literature could have been used to teach if that is what she was doing at the time of the disclosure of the "truth".