How much should each family pay the baby sitter?

Discussion in 'Community Board' started by kdonnel, Jan 10, 2019.

  1. jiminyC_fan

    jiminyC_fan DIS Veteran

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    Regarding the babysitting, I find the argument totally stupid and childish. It's not like a big sum of money or something. I would do 50/50 but I can see the other way, also. I don't see it as a clear right or wrong way. If it didn't end the way I thought it should then I just wouldn't share again.
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2019
  2. DisneyHardin

    DisneyHardin DIS Veteran

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    I think it also may be somewhat regional. I've seen this discussion come up before and people from different parts of the country have said that many restaurants around them don't allow separate checks and that the diners have to figure up each person's portion themselves. Then, when diners have to actually calculate out what they owe, I can see where someone might say "lets just split it in half" to make it easier. Where I live (in KY), servers always ask about checks and don't hesitate to do separate checks when requested.
     
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  4. skyblue17

    skyblue17 Mouseketeer

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    Possible! I live in NYC and we don't often ask, but if it's offered, we sometimes say yes. When I visited Oklahoma last year, we were given separate checks. My friend and I actually split a meal... and they split the cost of the meal onto our two separate checks!
     
  5. LongLiveRafiki

    LongLiveRafiki DIS Veteran

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    That's because I said what I do when going out with others. The conversation about restaurants started with something about splitting the check evenly regardless of what people ordered and led to discussion of alternatives, hence no reason for me to bring up your option, since a) it had already been brought up and was what we were discussing alternatives for, and b) I was listing only what I would do.

    I think it depends on the baby/toddler/kid. Most sitters though, and the vast majority of daycares do charge extra for infants and toddlers than for older kids. With little ones, you have diapers and they need assistance eating or you deal with bottles, and you generally have to keep a closer eye on them. An 8 yr old can generally be trusted not to get hurt/do something dangerous while you use the restroom; a toddler, not so much.

    Just last week, my best friend and I went to a hibachi restaurant. He ordered the combo dinner with lobster, steak, chicken, and shrimp, plus 2 glasses of wine and a soda. His bill was around $70. I had the vegetarian dinner and water for $15. That's far too large of a price difference to make splitting the check evenly a reasonable suggestion.

    Or you just get separate checks and pay for what you actually ordered. I wouldn't not go out with someone anymore because they order more expensive food than I do. I'd just tell the server before we ordered that we'd like the checks split.
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2019
  6. Toolulu22

    Toolulu22 DIS Veteran

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    My husband and I, and our friends who we eat out with regularly have solved the second part of this- we ask for separate checks when we go out. While it may seem as though it could be awkward, we once we started doing this, it became a usual thing. It takes pressure off each couple when they want to order appetizers, alcoholic drinks, desserts, or when one person has a burger and someone else has a filet mignon.
     
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  7. Toolulu22

    Toolulu22 DIS Veteran

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    LSAT flashbacks.
     
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  8. msjprincess

    msjprincess DIS Veteran

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    We share vacation houses with other couples often. The costs all get split evenly between couples no matter how many kids. The adults get the master bedrooms with King or Queen beds. The kids all pile in rooms with bunks and twin beds. I did have someone tell me if she went her son would need one of the king/queen master bedrooms. In that case I told her she would have to pay more.

    We also split dinner bills evenly. Sometimes we come out ahead and sometimes not. It all evens out eventually. I'm not sure if it's generational or regional. I'm in my 50s and live in the NYC area.

    As for the OP I would probably split it 10/5.
     
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  9. sam_gordon

    sam_gordon DIS Veteran

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    Obviously what works for the people involved is great. I do find it interesting that you would split the babysitting 66%/33%, but the vacation home and dinner bills are 50/50. Not criticizing, just find it interesting.
     
  10. Mackenzie Click-Mickelson

    Mackenzie Click-Mickelson DIS Veteran

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    I'm totally for the 2/3 thing. I'm also for 50/50 but I 'feel' 2/3 is more adequate.

    I also think it's ridiculous this wasn't hashed out ahead of time. I can only think of maybe both couples thought in the end it would be fair but neither were using the same definition of fair.

    Hopefully the couples think twice before sharing services.
     
  11. EveDallas

    EveDallas Always keep fighting

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    This is how I would do it. 50-50 doesn't seem right because couple 1 has two of the three kids.

    ETA: $15 per hour for three kids is crazy cheap. I charge $15 for the first kid and an extra $5 for each additional kid.
     
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  12. msjprincess

    msjprincess DIS Veteran

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    Because in the case of dinner it ends up evening out over time. With the rental house the kids are all sharing the bunk rooms so they're not costing anymore money or taking up more space. With a babysitter she's taking care of 2 kids as opposed to one. The people with 2 kids are using more resources.
     
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  13. disneychrista

    disneychrista DIS Veteran

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    This is the way I would have done it.
     
  14. Cannot_Wait_4Disney

    Cannot_Wait_4Disney Ok all you A cattle, get in ...

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    If I had a $10 salad and somebody had a bottle of wine, steak and lobster, and a desert, we wouldn't be splitting that bill :)
     
  15. WebmasterMaryJo

    WebmasterMaryJo Techarita Staff Member Administrator

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    This is how I break out costs, especially if my group has more. I think it's the fairest. I also agree with divide by three, pay by the number of kids. (So, to answer the question, my opinion is that they were both wrong - not 50/50, and not just the $3 for the third child.)
     
  16. mummabear

    mummabear DIS Veteran

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    Yeah but, it's really no different to babysit an 8 and a 10 year old as it is to just do the 8 year old. The cost was set whether it was 1 or 2 kids. If they had both got a babysitter it would have cost them each $12, regardless of one couple having 2 and the other only having 1.
     
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  17. sam_gordon

    sam_gordon DIS Veteran

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    Actually you can't say this, because you don't know what another babysitter would charge. It's possible the other babysitter would have been a neighbor or family and wouldn't have charged anything, or very little. And again, which child is #1 ($12), which is #2 ($0), and which is #3 ($3)?
     
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  18. smiths02

    smiths02 DIS Veteran

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    I am generally a $10/$5 person, but I can see 50-50 being fair since the babysitting was done in the house with the 2 kid family. The babysitter and 1 kid probably used food, water, electricity, etc. that the 2 kid family paid for.
     
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  19. FairestOfThemAll37

    FairestOfThemAll37 DIS Veteran

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    I usually find it’s alcohol that really tips the scales when dining out with others. I’m not a teetotaler, but I’m not a big drinker. I almost always drive myself and have an incredibly low tolerance so I’m just not comfortable having more than one low alcoholic beverage and driving. Most of the time I’m not even in the mood to drink. Many of my friends, however, will have a pre-dinner cocktail and a couple of glasses of wine with dinner. This can add $50+ to the tab. For a one of dinner I’m not going to quibble, but regularly this really adds up.
     
  20. mjkacmom

    mjkacmom DIS Veteran

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    I was a waitress for a few years in college (in secaucus right outside NYC) and was never asked to split the check. We don’t ask the server to split the check, and servers don’t ask. However, I’ve traveled out of this area with other families, and have had it done, and it’s pretty awesome, you can order anything without feeling guilty. I assume restaurants here would be accommodating, but no one would think to ask. I just make sure I have a variety of bills when I go out with others.
     
  21. Mackenzie Click-Mickelson

    Mackenzie Click-Mickelson DIS Veteran

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    I frequently am out with people who don't share my same eating habits.

    Be it my in-laws, my best friends, husband's coworkers, etc. Probably the person that it comes closest to is my mom but even then she'll get a few beers (bud light though lol) when I'm not interested and even though the beers don't normally add up to too too much sometimes they can depending on where we go.

    My husband and I don't really do apps (unless that's our whole meal), desserts are usually special affairs, normally it's one or two beers when we get one (unless on an uber special) and our entree is not normally all that much.

    But I will fully admit we have not been out to eat with other people and the expectation is set to split 50/50. Every single time we're out and about with people either we or they ask to split checks. That is our normal not the expectation that we split 50/50.
     

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