How much $ - niece wedding gift

[can'tgetenufofwdw]

We are traveling out of state (airfare, rental car, lodging(our choice) for a wedding. Husband has been asked to give away his niece. Hasen't seen her in about 4 years. She doesn't care if he rents a tux or wears his black suit. Say's it's up to him. Not getting married in a church. Wedding /reception in the same place. My question is how much is appropriate for a gift? I know I will get answers ranging in every direction. We live comfortably but by no means are we wealthy. Should we give more because husband is "in the wedding"? Thanks for all opinions.

 

[Alexander]

When I'm not sure how much money to give for a wedding gift, I try to buy a gift instead. Something that looks expensive, but was on sale, or didn't cost as much as it looks like it should.

 

[Gigi22]

Presumably your family is close to your niece, as your DH is giving her away? Judging from your post, your niece sounds like a nice realistic kind of person, not a diva-bride. I think she would appreciate a small gift of something lasting--something that she will always be able to remember came from you.
For example, when we got married, close family friends gave us a swarovski swan, which I still treasure. You could always add a gift card, if you felt like giving more--but she will be able to keep and treasure a meaningful object.

 

[DebMcDonald]

Find out where they are staying for their wedding night and pay for the hotel. This was by far my most favorite gift and such a surprise, but we showed up at the hotel and checked in and had a beautiful hand written card and a bottle of champage and the hotel paid for by my boss. At the time and I worked two hours away from the hotel.

 

[Justsyd2]

Find out where they are staying for their wedding night and pay for the hotel. This was by far my most favorite gift and such a surprise, but we showed up at the hotel and checked in and had a beautiful hand written card and a bottle of champage and the hotel paid for by my boss. At the time and I worked two hours away from the hotel.

I love this idea! Your DH must be special to his niece since she asked him to give her away - that's such an honor. I agree that this would be such a special gift to her!

 

[mrsklamc]

I agree that this is a fabulous idea if you can afford it. $ amounts vary widely by region as to what is appropriate.

 

[mjkacmom]

Where is the wedding?

 

[can'tgetenufofwdw]

VERY close to a certain mouse we all love

 

[drnriordan]

Just so you know, these posts rarely go well, so be prepared for a downward spiral and a thread closure by a mod.

 

[princess&her4princes]

Find out where they are staying for their wedding night and pay for the hotel. This was by far my most favorite gift and such a surprise, but we showed up at the hotel and checked in and had a beautiful hand written card and a bottle of champage and the hotel paid for by my boss. At the time and I worked two hours away from the hotel.

I think this is a great idea, too!!

 

[Belle & Ariel]

Find out where they are staying for their wedding night and pay for the hotel. This was by far my most favorite gift and such a surprise, but we showed up at the hotel and checked in and had a beautiful hand written card and a bottle of champage and the hotel paid for by my boss. At the time and I worked two hours away from the hotel.

I think this is a wonderful idea for a gift from a boss, but I would rather receive a gift from an uncle who had the honor of giving me away that I would always have to remember the day and connect with him. Our DD got married a few months ago and instead of giving money, I got her things she would always treasure--a picture with their names and wedding date with favorite Bible verse, a springform pan set (we love to try new cheesecake recipes together), some Disney ornaments of course, cookware, etc. I actually filled a laundry basket with things that were little jokes and memories between us. Girls today can be nuts about cookbooks. Get the recent Betty Crocker one and enclose some family recipes with it.
Maybe these ideas will help.

 

[Evi]

I think paying for the hotel would be nice but if its out of your means I'd look into other things that she could treasure forever. But its important you also are aware of her tastes. I don't like Tchotchkes personally I like things that are very contemporary and open so I don't have shelves of miniatures and always dread when people buy me gifts to decorate my home. I feel like home decorating is so personal you shouldn't be forced to display gifts that other people give you.

That is the reason I suggest you look into what she likes. If she collects something perhaps you can find out if shes been saving up for a particular item. Is she into fine china or silverware you could buy a silverware chest or a larger piece for her china set (again if its fine china or sterling silver pieces). Does she like to display pictures? You could buy a nice size sterling silver picture frame in her style be it contemporary or classic and enclose a beautiful well written note from your husband. She obviously cares for him since she chose him to give her away and would value a hand written letter and a family heirloom to boot.

In the end its important that if you buy a gift instead of money, that you make it very personal. You want it to be something that's treasured or appreciated.

 

[Kathi OD]

We are traveling out of state (airfare, rental car, lodging(our choice) for a wedding. Husband has been asked to give away his niece. Hasen't seen her in about 4 years. She doesn't care if he rents a tux or wears his black suit. Say's it's up to him. Not getting married in a church. Wedding /reception in the same place. My question is how much is appropriate for a gift? I know I will get answers ranging in every direction. We live comfortably but by no means are we wealthy. Should we give more because husband is "in the wedding"? Thanks for all opinions.

I'm of the opinion that there is no "right" amount for a gift. Only the giver can decide what is right for them to give, based on what they can afford. While some people might say you should give more because your DH is in the wedding, I'd be inclined to say you might give a little less, especially when taking into consideration your traveling expenses. I know that we would be taking those into consideration before deciding on how much money we would have available for a gift, whether it is cash or some other type of gift.

As you can tell, I'm not one of those people who believes that I have to give a gift that covers the cost of my plate. Weddings are events where the bride and groom should invite those people they want to share their special moment with regardless of how much they "give" as a gift. Expecting the guests to "pay" for their meal is a bit gauche.

 

[arminnie]

Do you have family photos of her as a small child, her parents, etc.? You can scan the photos and upload them to shutterfly and make a nice album. I can guarantee that she would love getting something like that. Maybe with some some annnotations.

I recently went to the wedding where I had been maid of honor at the groom's parents' wedding. The bride and groom loved hearing stories about his parents' courtship and marriage. I have pictures that they had never seen.

 

[Mom2apirate&princess]

Both of my aunts each gave us $100. That was 14 years ago though.

 

[a1tinkfans]

We are traveling out of state (airfare, rental car, lodging(our choice) for a wedding. Husband has been asked to give away his niece. Hasen't seen her in about 4 years. She doesn't care if he rents a tux or wears his black suit. Say's it's up to him. Not getting married in a church. Wedding /reception in the same place. My question is how much is appropriate for a gift? I know I will get answers ranging in every direction. We live comfortably but by no means are we wealthy. Should we give more because husband is "in the wedding"? Thanks for all opinions.

Give what you can afford and what you WANT to give IMHO! You are under no obligation and your presence is probably much more important to your family! have a nice time!

 

[Halbleib1]

IMO you give what you are comfortable with and can afford. We received cash gifts anywhere from $10-50 at our wedding in 2003. It is not supposed to be about the cost but the thought.

When my sister got married we did not have a lot of money to spare- we gave my sister a Cinderella anniversary clock as a shower gift since she was doing a downscaled princess theme. It cost around $20.00. For the wedding gift we gave them a nice bbq set in a case that we paid $15.00 for on clearance but was originally worth much more. They have gotten a lot of use out of that and my sister said that her husband appreciated getting something that was more for him since all the other non-cash gifts were more for her.

 

[disneydreamersx4]

IMO you give what you are comfortable with and can afford. We received cash gifts anywhere from $10-50 at our wedding in 2003. It is not supposed to be about the cost but the thought.

When my sister got married we did not have a lot of money to spare- we gave my sister a Cinderella anniversary clock as a shower gift since she was doing a downscaled princess theme. It cost around $20.00. For the wedding gift we gave them a nice bbq set in a case that we paid $15.00 for on clearance but was originally worth much more. They have gotten a lot of use out of that and my sister said that her husband appreciated getting something that was more for him since all the other non-cash gifts were more for her.

I want to be in your circle for gift giving DH has to give at least $200 to family/close friends getting married

 

[Halbleib1]

I want to be in your circle for gift giving DH has to give at least $200 to family/close friends getting married

I am sorry but you should not feel that you have to do anything. A gift is just that a gift. It is not mandatory. They may be upset but I would say that is their problem not yours. Most people I am sure can not afford to give that much and to expect that is just selfish IMO. Any gift should be enough to let them know that you were thinking about them. When we can not afford to give a lot I always put a lot of thought into what I give. If the person can use the money more than that is what we give otherwise we pick something out that we think they will enjoy. I try to do what a pp said and get something on sale that would cost a lot more had I of paid full price for it.

The reason for inviting someone to a wedding is not supposed to be about what they will bring in gifts but about sharing your special day with those that you care about and love.

 

[disneydreamersx4]

I am sorry but you should not feel that you have to do anything. A gift is just that a gift. It is not mandatory. They may be upset but I would say that is their problem not yours. Most people I am sure can not afford to give that much and to expect that is just selfish IMO.

The reason for inviting someone to a wedding is not supposed to be about what they will bring in gifts but about sharing your special day with those that you care about and love.

Tell that to DH & His family or practically all of NY/NJ
this area is crazy when it comes to gift giving!!

I believe what you do, give from your heart