How do I get DS6 to do his schoolwork?

[Lovin' Disney]

Lately I have been having a problem with DS6, who is in kindergarten. He hasn't been doing his papers during school and then has to do them outside at recess or have them sent home as homework.

I asked the teacher what he was doing instead of his work. She said he was playing with stuff--his pencil box, a rolled up piece of paper, etc.

The teacher and I are friendly and on the PTA together, so I feel like she might not want to punish my DS because it could get awkward (she is a shy/wishy-washy type of person).

However, I have told her a few times that I am ok with her doing whatever it takes to get him to do his work. I don't understand why she can't take whatever he is playing with away from him and get him back on track.

I know that the work is easy for him because he has gotten 100's all year, so he might be bored. However, I don't know what to do to motivate him to do his work along with the rest of the class. I really don't think it is ADD because he can sit for hours reading a book, working on Legos, etc.

Does anyone have any suggestions??

 

[EthansMom]

If I were you, I would talk to him and explain that school is his "job" and he needs to be paying attention to his teacher and doing his work. Maybe offer an appropriate reward if he does better for the rest of the school year?

 

[MNdisneymom]

Speaking as one kindy mom to another, I can feel your pain. My question is, do you know what the classroom environment is like? I ask this because my DS can sit at home and do things quietly, and in class is another matter because his classroom is extremely chaotic. (Not "normal" kindergarten chaos, there are a couple of kids with some pretty severe behavioral issues.) My angel can goof around a lot when the teacher is distracted.

What works for us...I aid in the classroom one day a week, and you can bet he stays on task then (LOL). As for the other days, if he comes home with a work sheet that isn't done, he has to do it, plus some "extra" work for me-- usually a couple of pages out of a more challenging (first grade level) workbook. (I think part of his problem in class is boredom--k work is stuff he did in preschool, mostly.)

Good luck...just remember, the school year is almost over!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Why doesn't the teacher have any suggestions? Of course as a parent we have to make sure our kids know what is expected of them but surely the teacher has had other students that needed a little more motivation before. Why doesn't she have any plans in place to help students who cannot stay focused? If the child is playing with a pencil box etc. then make the kid do the work at a table that has nothing on it. Give the kid a chart for inside his folder with a goal to work towards. Give the kid extra work that maybe is more challenging. She needs to come up with a system that works and you both need to be on board with it. I cannot believe that she has no suggestions. Has every child she ever met been exactly the same?

As for your end of it, well, I would tell your child that at school they are there to learn and to work. That playing around when it is work time is disrespectful to the teacher and that you know that he would never be disrespectful because he is a good boy. Also that you want him to learn and to be smart and the teacher is helping him to do that etc.

Good luck!

 

[Lovin' Disney]

Thanks for the suggestions so far. To answer a PP's question, the classroom environment seems to be pretty much under control. I am there at least once a week picking DS up from school and I often get there before they are dismissed and everything always seems under control. There are about 15 kids, none with behavioral problems or special needs.

DS is a quiet kid, so I wonder if that has something to do with it. Perhaps if she called on DS a few times during each lesson, it would help him to pay attention.

Someone mentioned putting him at a table by himself, but they only have their desks, no tables, so that is not an option. However, she could take away his pencil box until dismissal and leave out whatever he needs to finish his paper.

I am trying a rewards system today....DS found some fingerpaints in the closet and I told him he could try them out after school if I get a good report from his teacher today.

 

[brymolmom]

Definitely work WITH the teacher on a plan. Maybe she can sit down with him at school (and you at home) and reiterate that you have talked to each other and that he will get one warning to work on his work (obviously - she can't constantly be on him - since she has 14 other kids to make sure are doing work too) - and then, after that, some sort of note home to mom/dad. ON the home side - maybe some sort of chart indicating days that he did well or not. My nephew - same thing - he is bored and would not do as asked. They have a 'punishment' system of red-yellow and green - Dsis asked dteacher to let her know his color every day. The deal was that if he got on yellow (or red) ANY day that week - no Wii the whole weekend (and they are only allowed Wii on weekends). This worked rather quickly as he had to watch his brother playing it the whole weekend and he was out of luck.

He improved dramatically after about a month of this.

 

[Rand0mTh0ughts]

I teach 5th grade, currently, but I have also taught 1st grade. These are some suggestions I give to my parents:

For that young age (K, 1st) I suggest making a nightly consequence system to start out. It helps for them to see more immediate consequences. For example, if he gets all of his homework done in a timely manner, then he can have _______. (30 min of TV time, 30 min of video games, etc.) If he does not get it done in a timely manner, then no tv or video games that evening, but he can read or color instead. Sometimes digital kitchen timers can be motivating.

Also, it helps some kids to have a routine for homework - to do it at the same time and place most evenings. Maybe come home and have a snack and play, and then have homework time before dinner at the kitchen table. Or have everyone sit together at the table after dinner while he does homework and you read, pay bills, etc.

Use the rest of this year to find a system that works best, and then implement it right away when he starts first grade!

Good luck!!

 

[Betzee]

We had an issue with my DD6 not finishing up her work during what they call "center time." The teacher is working on reading with a small group of children and the others are supposed to be doing 4 - 5 other tasks, i.e., worksheets, etc., that she explains prior to beginning the reading groups, while she works only with the reading groups.

She pays little attention to the non-reading group children during this time (don't get me started on whether I agree with this system...I don't... ) and my daughter would frequently not get her work done, as no one was paying attention to what she was or was not doing. She would then say that she didn't remember what she had to do, etc., and if she asked the teacher, teacher would say she didn't have time to talk to her now as she was doing reading, and she better go ask another child (another "grrr" from me on this response from the teacher... )

I suggested that the teacher develop a checklist of the numbered items that needed to be done, which my daughter checked off as each was completed. This worked great, as she knew she had to do how ever many items that day, and was required to keep track that they were done. This pretty much fixed the problem and she was proud to show me at the end of the day, that she had checked off all her items (and would get a sticker or smiley face from teacher.)

It got to the point where the other kids wanted a checklist, too, so they could get a sticker...

Perhaps something like this would work for your son, if he has something tangible to help him keep track of what he needs to get done?

Good luck! I know how frustrating it is, when you know they can do the work and they just don't get it done for whatever reason. Especially when it seems like just a little extra support from the teacher would make all the difference...

 

[stacy6552]

Personally, I think its a bad idea for kids that age to work through recess, because they need to burn the energy. I'd tell the teacher to send anything he doesn't get done home, and then sit on him while he does it once he gets home, no TV or play....until he gets it done. It might be torture at first, but once he can predict what's going to happen, it should work as a motivator in class.

Now I'm not saying your son has ADHD, because this can be appropriate for the age or the group....But as a mom of a son with ADHD, I will tell you that your reasoning for dismissing it is off. Concentrating on things he likes to do like reading and legos is a completely different part of the brain than he uses for assigned things like classwork.

 

[ilandrazdsw]

So my DS is with you...and all this time I thought he was in his room.

I feel you pain. DS was this exact same way this year. His teacher and I attributed it to mainly this:
Maturity (lack there of) and Stubborness (he coudl do the work, just didn't want to and wouldn't)
DS was in the first grade and 5 yo (and a summer baby at that)...he was capable of doing the work (reads at a 3rd gr level) just had more interest in not doing it. He also woulnd't ask for help and would get frustrated if the work didn't come easy to him. The teacher had very many students that needed A LOT of help and when he was asked why he doesn't ask for help, DS said that that she doesn't see him to help (I volunteered in his class and the more capable kids really do get glanced over).
I wish I could offer more advice over and above the reward system (and make sure it is immediate from the teacher too). Part of our solution was moving to a better school without a lot of the problems his former one had...but we'll see if it works next year...along with some more maturity!

Good Luck