Hi
I've posted here before, I'm still in the middle of whether or not I am going to be homeschooling my dd9. She has had problems in school since day 1 of Kindergarten, but now, in 3rd grade she is even worse off. She says her stomach feels sick every morning walking into school. She has this one friend in the class that apparently rules her every move, and i'm just finding out about this now. She has severe test anxiety, and it makes her sick if she has to do something in front of the class or school.
I actually put in a request to homeschool in october, but took it back, because something felt "wrong" And now I have the teachers and pyschologists telling me if I take her out of school for anxiety, her anxiety will only get worse, and she most likely will not attend college for the fear. So, what if that is true, I don't want to doom her

I am so at a loss here. I don't know what to do.
The school psychologist called me today. I agreed to let her talk to her once, and then she'll call me and we'll decided if I want to sign a consent to let her see her regularly. I just don't know if I want to do that. When a child has a problem at school I feel like it is the school VS the parent. I feel like the school has no intent to work WITH the parent. I feel like they always want to blame children't issues on what's going on at home. So, i'm thinking maybe I should set dd9 up with a pyschologist not associated with the school.
When this stuff comes up I know I want to homeschool her, but I don't want to do it if it's going to be sheltering her from her anxiety and making it worse as she gets older and has to go out in the world.
What is your advice if you've taken your child out of school for anxiety or similar issues.
Any advice at all will help actually ,even if you've decided to homeschool for a different reason.
Dh agrees with me too by the way, he is all for it to homeschool her, why do I feel like it is the wrong thing to do. Why do I care what other people are going to think(That bothers me too for some reason)
HELP
We have friends whose son suffers from an anxiety disorder.
They pulled him out of school BECAUSE he had it.
The time at home allowed him to focus on academics,
AND, consequently, gave him a LOT more self confidence,
which, in turn, helped with the anxiety.
He has anxiety to the point of using medication.
But they were able to get a better read of "normal" by homeschooling him
[i.e. they could better tell what was "extra" anxiety that needed medical attention].
We're supposed to be building them UP, not tearing them down so they'll be USED to being torn down!!!
I think that the most important person in this WHOLE situation that you have to consider is YOUR child.
If homeschooling would be better for her NOW, then homeschool her.
Do you intend to never let her out of the house? Of course not!
So how sheltered would she actually be?
There are FORTY families in our homeschool group.
My kids have PLENTY of exposure to the "outside world." LOL
Not to mention, if she continues to be tortured by school, she will never WANT to go to college! Why subject herself to more of the same!
You are absolutely right about the school (as an entity, not always individuals there) taking over as parent.
In their defense, some parents aren't as involved as you are.
No excuse, for sure! They need to learn when to back off.
Make sure you if you withdraw her, that you have ALL your ducks in a row before you do.
Contact HSLDA NOW, so that you know what legally the school can ask of you, and what they cannot.
Maybe that will give you peace.
Having a dh that's on board is a BIG help!
In the end, it REALLY IS your decision what schooling will be best for her,
and you do not need their permission or advice.
Hoping you find the answer!
