Homeschool Chat Part III

[MommyBell08]

Here is a very interesting video on education:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U

Definitely gets you thinking.

Very cool!

 

[gerberdaisy1234]

First off, this consideration is in the very infant stages. I have not researched very much other than my state laws & city requirements. I would like to hear from anyone that has any experience with homeschooling or just can share some good/bad points. Like I said this is only a consideration right now and I will explain a little why.

My 14 year old DS is in the 8th grade. He was held back in 2nd grade due to struggling in pretty much all areas. He did have ADHD, then as he got older diagnosed as ADD. He no longer takes medication simply because he no longer needs it like he did. Meds or not it never changed his learning problems. He did have a 504 plan, which the middle school last year pressured me to stop it because they don't really utilize it anyway. One thing I have learned through all of these years of him struggling is, if your child is not technically learning disabled or an easy learner (including gifted or just smarter) then they can easily fall through those invisable cracks you always hear about. I have gone against teachers and schools trying to get him the help I think he needs only to become frustrated with the entire system. He has totally shut down this year and I can't change it. His teachers are fed up because he gets frustrated and then gets an attitude because they don't have the time to help him one on one. He tells his sister he gets picked on, but refuses to discuss it with me. I can't even get him to bring home his homework anymore, he just doesn't care any longer. His teachers won't post his homework on the webpage, so I never know what is even due. He is just so frustrated and tired by the end of the school day that he is totally shut down to even think about homework.

With that said, I know what he needs and I know how to get through to him. I myself did not go to college. I only have my high school diploma and trade school. I am aware there are programs available. Is this reason enough to homeschool him? I am so scared that I may hurt him more than help, but then again I see what path he is on and I refuse to lay down and do nothing. Our school system here is good. I have my oldest DD who breezed right through advanced classes and my youngest DD who is in the gifted class. My son is totally different and has always had a hard time. I mentioned to him just in passing and his reaction was "PLEASE, I can't take it anymore". I just feel like crying, just as I have for years over him. I can't really discuss this with my friends because I know that they don't have any problems with their children and school so they just wouldn't understand.

Kim

Hi Kim

I pulled my kids from our small, private catholic school 2 years ago (dd was in 4th and ds was in 2nd). Our last 2 years of homeschooling have been the best years of their learning and our family lives!

Your ds sounds a lot like my ds9. I have a feeling the part I bolded above (and his AHDH and ADD) is more due to his learning style than anything else. That could be why the meds didn't help w/ his schooling - because it wasn't the problem in the first place. Technically, there could very well be NO *problem* - it could just be his learning style.

I very, very highly recommend http://www.learningsuccessinstitute.com/mariaemma.html
for you to assess his learning style. There's a homeschool assessment on the left side.

Assessing my ds and homeschooling him 'saved' him from a downhill spiral in learning and reaching his full potential. My ds couldn't complete his math work (2nd grade), and would come home w/ "INCOMPLETE CLASSWORK" in red ink on the top of the worksheet (made him feel really good - every day he said "mom, I'm the stupidest kid in class"), THEN after trying to complete that worksheet, we had all the regular homework to do. It was impossible for him. He was DONE with schooling for the day.

BUT the problem lay in his own, individual learning style, not in the school, and not in his brain. No learning disability or anything like that, but he learns very different from the average student, and schools can only cater to the average student (of course - they have 30 kids they're trying to keep under control and teach to). Here's what I figured out w/ my ds... the actual writing of the math was getting in the way of him 'learning' the math. He NEEDS to figure out something in his head on his own before he can really see it written down and get it (I'm soooo the opposite - I have to see it written down first), and i would have never known this about him, and he would have continued to struggle horribly if I had kept him in school.

His first grade teacher had called me in for a conference because ds wasn't showing all his work on the math problems... he was getting the correct answer, but that's it. He was doing it in his head. She said she was going to start marking them all wrong, even if they were right, because he needed to show the work. I get that the teachers need to see that - so we really tried at home to get him to do this. Never happened. Now, when I teach him math, we do it all verbally and with games, etc, then when he really gets it, we can go to paper. School has to do it the other way around.

When I pulled my kids from school (2 years ago this coming March), we 'deschooled' for a little while, which was hard for me to feel ok doing, because I was so programed to think that even a missed day of school would hold them back later in life. I LOL at that thought now, but it took a while for me to get there, with major support from veteran homeschooling moms.

In my ds's learning assessment, he scored extremely high in "inventor" and "performer", and very low in everything else, which the one homeschooling mom who recommended the site said is not very common (kids are usually a little more well-rounded, like my dd11 is).

This was one of the problems w/ my ds and 'school'... his learning style is fairly extreme, and a school simply cannot accomodate it. And the funny thing is, I didn't see any "inventor" in him at the time, because school can't really allow that type of learner to shine. It's amazing to me, this past year, how much of an "inventor" he's become, and how much he learns through his being allowed to 'invent'. And it's because he's being allowed to become his true self by me homeschooling him. Also, "performer" means he has to move when learning, and that's certainly kind of hard to do in a school setting. My ds is like 3 boys rolled into one, always climbing, moving, goofing, etc. But when allowed to learn the way he's comfortable, his learning is easy. That was never the case in school.

My dd11 had a more well-rounded assessment, and she was doing fine in school, but she can really follow her passions being homeschooled. But she'd be ok either way I think.

I want to also recommend John Taylor Gatto and John Holt. Please take some time to read some of their books. John Taylor Gatto was "teacher of the year" 2 or 3 times in NYC, has retired, and is now a huge homeschooling advocate.

My kids are younger, so I don't have advice for the high school years, but wanted to just give you my experience so far.

Good luck deciding what to do.

Kimmyann- reading your post my eyes filled up. I loved what bellebud had to say (probably because her DS sound exactly like my DS ;-) I agree knowing your students' learning styles is so important. While you are at your beginning stages of research I have a feeling you are going to fall in love with homeschooling. You will also have tons of questions. Please ask us anything.

 

[ADAMANDLISA]

ahhhh yes! the jello-mind... I've had that too!

What I love about that method is being able to involve all the younger ages together. It's not "school-y" in the sense of textbooks for little kids... it just seems like such a 'nice' method for little ones. Good luck and enjoy - I LOVE hsing my kids! And I admit, I'm one of those moms who always missed my kids when they went off to school (I pulled them from 2nd and 4th grades) - I volunteered everyday at the school, and loved snow days and summer vacation time. (I didn't pull them because I missed them - there were many, many reasons I pulled them). But it's a great bonus to me to spend lots of time w/ them.

But that being said, my kids have tons of friends and we're part of a great homeschool group. My kids take weekly classes w/ other homeschoolers, they take gymnastics, and sleep over other peoples houses no problem. Just like kids who go to school. So them spending a lot of time w/ me doesn't make them or me clingy. So go ahead and enjoy holding onto them

I really wanted to start DS2 (Landon) with DS1 (Dylan) since they are only 15 months apart. Landon was supposed to start mini-ps this year, but he just really didn't want to do it. We used to tell him that if he learned to potty train, he would be able to go to school. Turns out that I think it was scaring him. He wasn't ready and the week after we told him that he didn't have to go, he was completely trained.

This year he is ready and I'm glad. He needs a little time to grow on his own without Dylan (who loves to dictate his life ). Then I will bring him home!

BTW, I finally decided on CM for our first year. What a weight lifted! Now to figure out what I want to do with this program!

Lisa,
I always recommend "So, You're Thinking About Homeschooling" by Lisa Whelchel. It's an easy read, conversational book that covers 15 different curricula in 15 different families that homeschool 15 different ways. It can give you a clear overview for what's out there and help you "rule out" options that won't work for you.

Find out your child's learning style. There's a book called "How to Maximize Your Child's Learning Potential" that gives a look at what each learning style is like at different ages, as well as age-appropriate ways to teach each type of child.

Five in a Row is a great preK curriculum that uses Charlotte Mason methods, if you're interested in such. You can also look into www.letteroftheweek.com that will give you a free curriculum for each sound of the alphabet.

Have fun!

I heard about "Blair's" book! I need to get over to the library to read it. The other one you mentioned sounds great too. It seems that a lot of people have to play around to find out what fits for them...especially when you have multiple children who are all so different.

 

[kimmyann]

I would highly recommend reading The Mislabled Child. I am just finishing up this book and it is amazing. It explains all the different learning issues and how they are commonly mislabled. Most of the kids labeled w/ADHD don't really have it, they have other issues that present as ADHD and most Dr's aren't informed enough or know enough to dig deeper. It have verified for me that my son has some auditory processing issues and Sensory Processing Disorder. SPD presents as ADHD in a lot of ways. I was sure my son had ADD in addition to SPD, but now I'm not so sure. My Dr. had mentioned SPD and said to look into that because if he has that you wouldn't approach it the same way as ADD.

It is a hard read in some areas but it is wonderful. I highly suggest anyone who is or who pulled there kids because they were having issues in school read this book. For me in confirmed that I am doing the right thing. Every section that has applied to my child has said the best learning enviornment for him is either a computer or homeschool.

Thank you guys so very much, not only you, but everyone on this board. You don't have any idea (well you probably do) how much of a relief this is to realize I am not alone. I just wish I would have known or even thought about this before. It's like opening a door to a whole new world and it feels great.

Kibbycat, WOW. I never would have looked at it like that. Thank you for sharing.

Kimmyann- reading your post my eyes filled up. I loved what bellebud had to say (probably because her DS sound exactly like my DS ;-) I agree knowing your students' learning styles is so important. While you are at your beginning stages of research I have a feeling you are going to fall in love with homeschooling. You will also have tons of questions. Please ask us anything.

 

[Nicolepa]

Thank you guys so very much, not only you, but everyone on this board. You don't have any idea (well you probably do) how much of a relief this is to realize I am not alone. I just wish I would have known or even thought about this before. It's like opening a door to a whole new world and it feels great.

Kibbycat, WOW. I never would have looked at it like that. Thank you for sharing.

When I pulledd my son out last year he was getting physically ill from the stress at school. He would get migraines so bad he would throw up and black out. I didn't realized they were from stress until he had been home about 6 months and I realized he hadn't had one since. We had been seeing a nurologist and talking about medication etc for him. He has been home 1.5 years now and has had 1 instance of a migraine causing him to throw up (and that was because he didn't eat all day).

When I ask him if when he thinks he wants to go back to school he says never. He disliked everything about it. We were orginally planning on him returning to school for Jr. high. At this point I don't see it happening before high school, if at all.

 

[sskem96]

I just pulled DD14 (8th grade) out of ps in Dec. She had never had a problem in school before, but she suddenly developed some psychiatric problems and wasn't able to attend school regularly. When she was there, it was in body only, so she wasn't absorbing anything. Even after figuring out what was wrong with her and getting meds straightened out, she just couldn't make it through the school day. She's perfectly capable of learning the material, but not necessarily from 8-2:45 M-F. We decided she would learn a lot more if we taught her at home so we'd have more scheduling flexibility and less distractions.

We are using Slavic Christian academy on-line. It gives her the accountability she needs (has to log on every day to complete lessons), and gives me the support I need. I work full time night shift, so I didn't feel like I could take on being full time teacher as well and ensure she was learning all she needed too. She is doing great with the program. Rather than do an assignment in each subject every day, she usually does all her math for the week one day, all her science the next day, etc. She finds it much easier to focus on the subject that way.

Her psychiatrist was very disapproving of me pulling her out of school, but I know it's the best thing for her right now. She's loving it and seems very much back to "normal" as far as her mental state is concerned. She takes gymnastics and cheer for her PE and socialization needs, and still gets together with her best friend from school regularly. Of course softball will be starting up as soon as the weather warms up.

DD11 is still in ps, and she plans to stay there. She's a social bug and it's working fine for her right now, so I'm not going to rock the boat.

The hs groups around here won't accept you if you aren't 100% homeschooling all of your children, but I have a coworker who is hsing her 2 teenage girls and has another in college, so she's my support system right now. Her kids went to ps til her oldest was in jr high too, and her youngest chose to stay in ps for the first couple years she was hsing the oldest two, so she understands our situation better than most people would.

Thanks for all the great ideas and book suggestions! I homeschooled my youngest for K, but that's my only past experience and this came up pretty suddenly, so I definitely have some learning of my own to do!

 

[LegoMom3]

I just pulled DD14 (8th grade) out of ps in Dec. She had never had a problem in school before, but she suddenly developed some psychiatric problems and wasn't able to attend school regularly. When she was there, it was in body only, so she wasn't absorbing anything. Even after figuring out what was wrong with her and getting meds straightened out, she just couldn't make it through the school day. She's perfectly capable of learning the material, but not necessarily from 8-2:45 M-F. We decided she would learn a lot more if we taught her at home so we'd have more scheduling flexibility and less distractions.

We are using Slavic Christian academy on-line. It gives her the accountability she needs (has to log on every day to complete lessons), and gives me the support I need. I work full time night shift, so I didn't feel like I could take on being full time teacher as well and ensure she was learning all she needed too. She is doing great with the program. Rather than do an assignment in each subject every day, she usually does all her math for the week one day, all her science the next day, etc. She finds it much easier to focus on the subject that way.

Her psychiatrist was very disapproving of me pulling her out of school, but I know it's the best thing for her right now. She's loving it and seems very much back to "normal" as far as her mental state is concerned. She takes gymnastics and cheer for her PE and socialization needs, and still gets together with her best friend from school regularly. Of course softball will be starting up as soon as the weather warms up.

Good for you sticking by your decision. Sounds like it was the right choice in this case and that's a great report re: your daughter. How encouraging that must be for you!

DD11 is still in ps, and she plans to stay there. She's a social bug and it's working fine for her right now, so I'm not going to rock the boat.

The hs groups around here won't accept you if you aren't 100% homeschooling all of your children, but I have a coworker who is hsing her 2 teenage girls and has another in college, so she's my support system right now. Her kids went to ps til her oldest was in jr high too, and her youngest chose to stay in ps for the first couple years she was hsing the oldest two, so she understands our situation better than most people would.

Thanks for all the great ideas and book suggestions! I homeschooled my youngest for K, but that's my only past experience and this came up pretty suddenly, so I definitely have some learning of my own to do!

Literally??!....or in the sense that they just sort of snub you?! I'm shocked either way! That is just wrong. There is a huge hs'ing group in my area but I've found it difficult to break into because we "unschool" and in this highly-academic part of our state, that seems to be frowned upon. Whatever. It works for us and my boys are thriving. At least you have your coworker....even one person is better than none. My "support" is all on-line at the moment but I'm a member of a few real good groups, so that helps too.

.

 

[graygables]

Her psychiatrist was very disapproving of me pulling her out of school, but I know it's the best thing for her right now.

This is not at all unusual as most psychiatrists have gone through a system that programs people to believe that only professionals can teach and children can only be "socialized" by being in large groups of their peers. It's quite sad. My youngest DD's psychiatrist took some convincing by bringing in work samples (lapbooks) as well as showing her calendar. I finally told him that I am the parent and I will make those decisions, not him, not the government, not anyone and if he didn't buy in, we'd find someone who would; I would not tolerate subversion. After spending some time with me and DD, he completely dropped the school thing and was able to focus on her real challenges (panic disorder).

I hope the psychiatrist can set aside personal programming about education and can help your DD continue to improve.

 

[gerberdaisy1234]

Here is a very interesting video on education:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U

Definitely gets you thinking.

Thank you for sharing. Very interesting.

 

[robinsegg]

I heard about "Blair's" book! I need to get over to the library to read it. The other one you mentioned sounds great too. It seems that a lot of people have to play around to find out what fits for them...especially when you have multiple children who are all so different.

We had to try different curricula before we found one we liked One of the things I did was to look at what my kids liked doing and what they liked doing with me. Since they love for me to read to them, we've settled on a curriculum style that is literature-rich. We've tried Sonlight, but the K selections scared me away We tried Beautiful Feet, but it wasn't enough direction, I guess. We tried Living Books, but we'd already covered the grade-level history, and it's all integrated. Now, we're using My Father's World and love it!

Just figure out what they like to do and see what you can find to incorporate it Don't worry if it takes some time and "trial and error" to find the "best fit"!

 

[robinsegg]

Are you guys aware of http://www.HomeschoolFreebieOfTheDay.com? It gives free resources each day of work week for homeschooling.

 

[bellebud]

This year he is ready and I'm glad. He needs a little time to grow on his own without Dylan (who loves to dictate his life ). Then I will bring him home!

BTW, I finally decided on CM for our first year. What a weight lifted! Now to figure out what I want to do with this program!

It seems that a lot of people have to play around to find out what fits for them...especially when you have multiple children who are all so different.

A lot of hser's in my group send their little ones to a pre-K, just for the fun and socialization, then they hs them for the real school years. sounds like a good plan!

Glad you decided to CM for your first year. It seems soooo wonderful for little kids! I'd love to hear about what you decide to do w/ it and how it works out for you.

We've had to play around A LOT to find what works for us, and we're still always changing, and that's one of the best parts of hsing!

When I pulledd my son out last year he was getting physically ill from the stress at school.

When I ask him if when he thinks he wants to go back to school he says never. He disliked everything about it.

My ds was developing tics from stress, and he very often had headaches, which I was assuming was from allergies... but no headaches since we quit school, and the tics are gone. Miracle! My ds9 always says he'll never go back to school, and I fully agree w/ him! His learning style is so opposite of a school-type learning environment - I'd never put him in that situation again. It would simply be a recipe for failure for him, and he's brilliant in his own way (as I truly believe every child is).

She's perfectly capable of learning the material, but not necessarily from 8-2:45 M-F.

Rather than do an assignment in each subject every day, she usually does all her math for the week one day, all her science the next day, etc. She finds it much easier to focus on the subject that way.

Her psychiatrist was very disapproving of me pulling her out of school,

We 'learn' (I try to not even call it school anymore) at so many various times throughout the day/week, we have no more set schedule. Learning opportunities arise, we see them and take advantage of them. It happens all the time, ESPECIALLY when it's not pre-planned. I do try to do the 3r's and a language on a regular basis, but everything else is spontaneous. My ds9 will say "mom, let's do my circuit board", and that's when we do 'science'. Whenever he feels like it.

I like how your dd is doing a 'math day', etc. I think that's a great benefit for some kids.

And your psychiatrist should watch that video someone else posted about factory style schools, because that's where he came from and that's all he can see. He knows nothing about different learning styles for different kids - he knows about medicating your dd for her panic disorder. That's all he should be commenting on for your dd.

 

[sskem96]

Literally??!....or in the sense that they just sort of snub you?! I'm shocked either way!
.

Well, I guess my hs DD and I could join, but my ps DD wouldn't be allowed to come to any of the activities even though many of them are outside of her regular school hours. With a group that feels so strong against ps, I don't think we'd be accepted well. Also, most of the hs'ers around here are Apostolic Christian and Mennonite. We're Lutheran, so we'd already be viewed as outsiders, much like the people on this thread who live in Utah where the hs groups are largely Mormon.

Things are going fine on our own for now. I'll have to look into adding some field trips so she doesn't get cabin fever! This has been the worst winter I can remember in recent years. We've had something like 4x more snow than average!

 

[CandyHead09]

Just wanted to say as a homeschooler WOO HOMESCHOOLING!

It's the best I highly recommend it for any skeptics! Your kids get way more room to grow and develop really good self esteem and strong personalities as well as amazing social skills (contrary to popular belief we are all really outgoing and good at making friends as we are all overly accepting haha) anddd you can go to Disney whenever you want because you can make up work before you go or when you get back and who wouldnt want that perk?!

 

[disneygirlsanddrew]

Do any of you know of any free fun online games that would help my 1st grader with her addition and subtraction facts? I need some reinforcement. I don't want to move on in our curriculum until she has them down some more and I am running out of ideas and patience. I thought a fun online game might be a nice option for something extra. Thanks!

 

[chicagoshannon]

Well, I guess my hs DD and I could join, but my ps DD wouldn't be allowed to come to any of the activities even though many of them are outside of her regular school hours. With a group that feels so strong against ps, I don't think we'd be accepted well. Also, most of the hs'ers around here are Apostolic Christian and Mennonite. We're Lutheran, so we'd already be viewed as outsiders, much like the people on this thread who live in Utah where the hs groups are largely Mormon.

Things are going fine on our own for now. I'll have to look into adding some field trips so she doesn't get cabin fever! This has been the worst winter I can remember in recent years. We've had something like 4x more snow than average!

Where in IL are you? Is there a neighboring town that you could go to to join a group?

 

[bellebud]

Just wanted to say as a homeschooler WOO HOMESCHOOLING!

It's the best I highly recommend it for any skeptics! Your kids get way more room to grow and develop really good self esteem and strong personalities as well as amazing social skills (contrary to popular belief we are all really outgoing and good at making friends as we are all overly accepting haha) anddd you can go to Disney whenever you want because you can make up work before you go or when you get back and who wouldnt want that perk?!

I couldn't agree more!!! Woo-hoo for hsing!!!!!

Do any of you know of any free fun online games that would help my 1st grader with her addition and subtraction facts? I need some reinforcement. I don't want to move on in our curriculum until she has them down some more and I am running out of ideas and patience. I thought a fun online game might be a nice option for something extra. Thanks!

try http://jmathpage.com/

there's TONS there to look through

 

[KibbyCat]

Do any of you know of any free fun online games that would help my 1st grader with her addition and subtraction facts? I need some reinforcement. I don't want to move on in our curriculum until she has them down some more and I am running out of ideas and patience. I thought a fun online game might be a nice option for something extra. Thanks!

Here's a cute one: http://coolmath-games.com/

The "Feed Fribbit" addition and subtraction fly-catching frog games are perfect for reinforcing math facts.

 

[weHEARTmickey]

After years of feeling like God has placed homeschooling on my heart, I have to say DH is FINALLY opening up to the idea!!! DD10 is in 4th grade & DS7 is in 1st. If I could (without hijacking your thread) I'd like to share a little of our background if I may.

DH owns bedding plant nurseries & only works March-late May or early June of each year. We feel truly blessed that God has allowed him to stay at home the other 9mos of the yr & I am a SAHM. We've felt the urging to begin going on mission trips & we took our first family mission trip to Piedras Negras, Mexico during our Christmas break. Well, that was IT! We are HOOKED & know this is what God has called us to do. Why else would DH only work 3mos out of the year? So, homeschooling just seems like the obvious choice, so we can travel when the opportunity arises.

I do have several concerns. Please don't think of us as "shallow" when I ask these questions. DS is EXTREMELY gifted in sports. (I know all moms think that, but he truly is.) What are the odds of him getting a sports scholarship while homeschooling?
What is an approximation of the $$ you spend per yr on books/curriculums?
I am "mathmatically challenged" so is there much help for me?
And finally, what curriculum do you recommend? (A friend recommends the Houston public school system online, or something like that.)
How many hours per day & days per wk do you have school?

I'm not at all worried about the social aspect, as many others have mentioned to us, b/c we are in church 3x per week, sports all yr, and have friends over all the time. Please forgive me for taking up so much space in your thread. I'm in the VERY early stages of this & I'm very nervous/excited. God bless, Angela

 

[Nicolepa]

I do have several concerns. Please don't think of us as "shallow" when I ask these questions. DS is EXTREMELY gifted in sports. (I know all moms think that, but he truly is.) What are the odds of him getting a sports scholarship while homeschooling?

In all honesty I wouldn't worry about scholarships at this point. Who knows what you will be called to do in 11 years when he graduates? I'm not being snarky, one of the big things about homeschooling is to not wonder about the what if's too far out. Most families I know take it one year at a time.

What is an approximation of the $$ you spend per yr on books/curriculums?
This will vary greatly. If you do a state funded online school (which I would not recommend in your situation) your cost would be zero. You can go up from there to thousands. This year I spent $100. I found all my cirriulum used at the homeschool resale shop or ebay.

I am "mathmatically challenged" so is there much help for me?
There are math cirriulums out there that are all computer based so you wouldn't have to do much teaching. The best part of homeschooling, IMO, is being able to learn with your children. I've learned so much interesting history these last 2 years.

And finally, what curriculum do you recommend? (A friend recommends the Houston public school system online, or something like that.)

The cirriculum you choose is going to really depend on you and your children and their learning style. I would get Cathy Duffy's Homeschool review and start looking at your different options. The reason I wouldnt' do the public online school is because you want to travel. I started out with an online public school and I felt hostage to the computer. My son hated it after the first year. It was all sit at your desk and do worksheet type stuff. He needs to move around and have more interaction. You have attendance requirements and progress goals that you must meet. I'm not saying it can't be done, but was stressful for me to even take a day off for a field trip. If you are going to be doing mission work, you may not have internet access and that will be required in order to complete some aspects of the schoolwork and report attendence.

Hope that helps!