High School class of 2011

[disykat]

I need advice.

So, DS is happy, going to school fairly close, we text occasionally, talk/skype at least weekly, and he's come home several times.

DH and I have been trying to plan a getaway for ourselves. We wanted to go away for my 50th birthday but didn't because we were sort of nervous about how the whole tuition paying thing was going to affect our finances. It's looking like our savings are staying intact and I've found we can do it for less than $1000 using frequent flier miles.

The time that is starting to make sense to us is DS's spring break. He is planning on coming home, his 16 old brother will be in school during the day, he should have other friends home to see and be job hunting for summer during that time. He could be "in charge" of his brother and take care of the dog.

I totally trust the boys to be home if they are together. The problem is my extreme GUILT. Would it be awful to leave when he is coming home? We would only be gone for half of the break. I can't believe less than a week after crying when we dropped him off again I'm considering this!

If we wait the two years when we won't have to worry about our younger son, our frequent flier miles will have expired. We're using a different credit card now for cash back.

What do you think? Are we horrible for even considering using him as a chaperone for his brother this way? The last time we did a several day getaway for just us (their grandparents came) was my 40th birthday, so it's not like we do this frequently!

 

[geffric]

I need advice.

So, DS is happy, going to school fairly close, we text occasionally, talk/skype at least weekly, and he's come home several times.

DH and I have been trying to plan a getaway for ourselves. We wanted to go away for my 50th birthday but didn't because we were sort of nervous about how the whole tuition paying thing was going to affect our finances. It's looking like our savings are staying intact and I've found we can do it for less than $1000 using frequent flier miles.

The time that is starting to make sense to us is DS's spring break. He is planning on coming home, his 16 old brother will be in school during the day, he should have other friends home to see and be job hunting for summer during that time. He could be "in charge" of his brother and take care of the dog.

I totally trust the boys to be home if they are together. The problem is my extreme GUILT. Would it be awful to leave when he is coming home? We would only be gone for half of the break. I can't believe less than a week after crying when we dropped him off again I'm considering this!

If we wait the two years when we won't have to worry about our younger son, our frequent flier miles will have expired. We're using a different credit card now for cash back.

What do you think? Are we horrible for even considering using him as a chaperone for his brother this way? The last time we did a several day getaway for just us (their grandparents came) was my 40th birthday, so it's not like we do this frequently!

sounds like a good idea to me..just make it clear that there will be no parties..tell neighbors, friends, relations..they will be home and to call and chat


also call any gf's Mom and let her know you are away,

But then take my advice with a gain of salt..as they say "been there , done that"..did it and it was okay ..plus now we are empty nester going a lot on vacation..

 

[minkydog]

I need advice.

So, DS is happy, going to school fairly close, we text occasionally, talk/skype at least weekly, and he's come home several times.

DH and I have been trying to plan a getaway for ourselves. We wanted to go away for my 50th birthday but didn't because we were sort of nervous about how the whole tuition paying thing was going to affect our finances. It's looking like our savings are staying intact and I've found we can do it for less than $1000 using frequent flier miles.

The time that is starting to make sense to us is DS's spring break. He is planning on coming home, his 16 old brother will be in school during the day, he should have other friends home to see and be job hunting for summer during that time. He could be "in charge" of his brother and take care of the dog.

I totally trust the boys to be home if they are together. The problem is my extreme GUILT. Would it be awful to leave when he is coming home? We would only be gone for half of the break. I can't believe less than a week after crying when we dropped him off again I'm considering this!

If we wait the two years when we won't have to worry about our younger son, our frequent flier miles will have expired. We're using a different credit card now for cash back.

What do you think? Are we horrible for even considering using him as a chaperone for his brother this way? The last time we did a several day getaway for just us (their grandparents came) was my 40th birthday, so it's not like we do this frequently!

Go on your couples vacation. It's not like you're leaving your kids at Christmas. One is an adult and the other will be an adult in a couple years. Stock the fridge with cokes& frozen pizza, make sure they know who to call if the lights go out or the toilets back up. I'm sure they will be fine.

I think most parents go through this at some point with their college kids. We did stay home when DD18 came home for 4 days during fall semester. At the time she was having a very difficult time adjusting to school and really NEEDED her family around her. She has relaxed since then and things are going well. I dont' think we'll feel guilty about taking off when she comes home for Spring Break in March.

 

[Disneycrazymom]

Have you talked to your sons? I would ask how DS feels about us going. We went on a cruise this fall and DS came home for the weekend to help my parents with running DD to all her events. He seemed happy to do it for us and felt like he was giving back to us.

Most schools are pretty close to the end of the semester by the time spring break comes around so you will all be home together for summer soon after your trip. I don't think there is anything to feel guilty about but I know how strong Mom guilt can be!

 

[disykat]

Thanks for making me feel better! I had just read your responses and was about to respond when DS called. DH and I talked to him and he seemed fine with it and committed to being around those days. I think DH and I may be spending four nights in New York City! Whoo hoo! I'm off to choose a hotel....

 

[minkydog]

Well, DD18 is safely back at school. She just called to let us know she got there okay. DH found a little box on our bed after she left. It says "To my birth givers, From Spawn." There's a tiny flower pot with forget-me-not seeds in it.

 

[Disneycrazymom]

Oh that is so sweet!!! Did you tear up? I would have for sure!

 

[minkydog]

Dang it! DD just called. Someone stole her bike during the break. This is the bike we just bought her in October. The one I begged her to bring home at the end of the semester or at least find someone local to store it for her. I know there are people where she works that would have been glad to put it in the back of their truck and keep it in their garage for a month. Nope, she left it chained up in the bike rack and left town for a month. So now the bike has disappeared and DD is all upset. DH told her to make a police report. I doubt anything will come of it. Its not a terribly valuable bike, except to her as a form of on-campus transportation. And I'm sure we won't make a claim on our homeowners insurance for a $150 bike! Arrrgh! I am not going to say "I told you so" because she feels pretty bad about it, but I am seriously disappointed. I mean, really, who didn't see this coming?

 

[agnes!]

That's a hard lesson minky. to you and your DD.

agnes!

 

[Disneycrazymom]

I am so sorry her bike was taken. It is a hard lesson for her. You have great self control. Good for you! I am sure she remembers you telling her to find a better place for it and will listen better next time. That won't make today any better. What a hard way to begin the new semester!

 

[ctinct]

Aaaaarrrgggghhhhhh! I've been working on the taxes today. In theory, they should be much easier, because for the first time in years I will be taking the standard deduction rather than itemizing, due to less home mortgage interest. BUT, I am having a devil of a time understanding the American Opportunity Credit. I wanted to get the taxes done so I can do the linked FAFSA thing in a few weeks , but I don't trust the way the taxes are coming out. The free online site I'm using is showing me a huge refund due to the AOC. All well and good, except if I have figured it wrong. For the first time ever, I feel like I'm going to need help. I found one of those free IRS sanctioned help sites at a nearby location next weekend. I just hope I don't have to wait for hours for someone to look over my return. This shouldn't be this hard! (Or maybe I am just a dope and overthinking it).

 

[ctinct]

Hmmm...from the IRS site itself:

Q8. How is the American opportunity tax credit calculated?

A. Taxpayers will receive a tax credit based on 100 percent of the first $2,000, plus 25 percent of the next $2,000, paid during the taxable year for tuition, fees and course materials.

Q9. How will the American opportunity tax credit affect my income tax return?

A. You will be able to reduce your tax liability by one dollar for each dollar of credit for which you're eligible. If the amount of the American opportunity tax credit for which you're eligible exceeds your tax liability, the excess will be refunded to you up to the lesser of 40 percent of the credit or $1,000.

Huh, so maybe my return IS correct. It's not that I don't appreciate the idea of the credit, but that's a lot of money not being collected for taxes if the vast majority of tuition paying people get at least $2000 back. I'm still confused though. I'm using made up figures, but the proportions are about right. The 1098T the college sent me has the whole year's tuition listed on it., say $20000. The scholarship part shows about half that amount, say $10000, in college scholarships, a college grant, and several outside scholarships that were applied to the fall semester. There were fewer scholarships for the spring semester, since most of the outside ones went toward the fall semester. But, since the school shows precisely half the full year's tuition as covered by scholarships and such, do I only get to claim books and such, or do I deduct the portion of tuition I paid for the spring semester, since they listed the total year fee? I know i can't claim room and board and such, but I'm not sure if I can claim the spring stuff, especially since it was paid in January---but then again, there is a box on the 1098T that says the tuition figure includes Jan-March 2012.

Like I said, this shouldn't be this hard. What am I doing wrong here?

 

[minkydog]

Hmmm...from the IRS site itself:

Q8. How is the American opportunity tax credit calculated?

A. Taxpayers will receive a tax credit based on 100 percent of the first $2,000, plus 25 percent of the next $2,000, paid during the taxable year for tuition, fees and course materials.

Q9. How will the American opportunity tax credit affect my income tax return?

A. You will be able to reduce your tax liability by one dollar for each dollar of credit for which you're eligible. If the amount of the American opportunity tax credit for which you're eligible exceeds your tax liability, the excess will be refunded to you up to the lesser of 40 percent of the credit or $1,000.

Huh, so maybe my return IS correct. It's not that I don't appreciate the idea of the credit, but that's a lot of money not being collected for taxes if the vast majority of tuition paying people get at least $2000 back. I'm still confused though. I'm using made up figures, but the proportions are about right. The 1098T the college sent me has the whole year's tuition listed on it., say $20000. The scholarship part shows about half that amount, say $10000, in college scholarships, a college grant, and several outside scholarships that were applied to the fall semester. There were fewer scholarships for the spring semester, since most of the outside ones went toward the fall semester. But, since the school shows precisely half the full year's tuition as covered by scholarships and such, do I only get to claim books and such, or do I deduct the portion of tuition I paid for the spring semester, since they listed the total year fee? I know i can't claim room and board and such, but I'm not sure if I can claim the spring stuff, especially since it was paid in January---but then again, there is a box on the 1098T that says the tuition figure includes Jan-March 2012.

Like I said, this shouldn't be this hard. What am I doing wrong here?

Ugh. I have no idea. It's worth every penny of the $150 we pay our financial guy to figure this all out for us.

 

[geffric]

I use tax software ..it is pretty much fill in the blank ...

 

[ctinct]

I use tax software ..it is pretty much fill in the blank ...

I'm using TaxAct freefile, but I don't understand the 1098T from the school. It has tuition for the entire year listed, but only the grants and scholarships from the fall semester. Her tuition was pretty much covered for the year by the grants/scholarships...there's just a few hundred that wasn't. However, the way the 1098T is set up, it looks like only half was covered. (I know I can use her books, too, though, in addition to tuition). I just don't get if I use the figure on the 1098T for tuition, or do I cut that in half since only half was actually paid in 2011?

What's scaring me even more is that some of her outside scholarships were split, and some were applied just to the fall semester. So, technically, if you break it down by semester, daughter received a bit more in scholarship and grant money than she was charged for tuition in the fall, so I'm wondering if I need to pay taxes on that portion? It's my understanding (though probably wrong) that scholarship funds used for room/board are taxable.

So....possible words of wisdom to parents of future college students who win scholarships in their senior year of hs: Try not to cash the checks and send the money in to the school yourself. It's far better, or at least it was at daughter's school, if you have the awarding agency send the checks to the school. The way the financial aid people explained it to me last fall, after I had sent some of the money directly to them , was this---If scholarship A is $1000, and the check is made out to the student, who cashes it and forwards a personal check made out to the college, it must be applied all to the first semester, because in the case of a student dropping out or transferring, if they had split it, the second half would be going to waste, and not able to be used as the scholarship provider intended. BUT, in the cases where scholarship B made out the check to the college, the college can "hold" half the funds until spring semester. If the student leaves the school, the college refunds the second half of the scholarship to the issuing agency. Of course, ymmv, but that's how it worked at my daughter's school.

Oh, and I have a headache from trying to figure this stuff out. The directions for form 8880 or whatever it is for the American Opportunity Credit aren't helping me at all. Time for bed. Hopefully a good night's sleep and a clearer head will let me find the answer in all the paperwork tomorrow.

 

[linnylu]

Ctinct, you might want to call the school's financial aid office and ask them what you should do. I have also heard that scholarship money toward room is taxable, but the student files it on their tax return. If you hear otherwise, would you mind posting it on here?

 

[Disneycrazymom]

The tax stuff is confusing. I didn't know we would be taxed on dorm allowances? DS gets a little stipend for living on campus.

On to better news - DS got a summer job today at a bookstore by our house. I am so glad he has a job lined up and won't have to worry about it over spring break.

 

[ctinct]

Ctinct, you might want to call the school's financial aid office and ask them what you should do. I have also heard that scholarship money toward room is taxable, but the student files it on their tax return. If you hear otherwise, would you mind posting it on here?

The school, understandably, will not comment on any tax issues. They just issue the 1098T, and that's it.

I tried to go to one of the VITA tax assistance sites this morning. It was at a library that opened at 10. I got there at 10:12 and thought to myself that there were an awful lot of cars in the lot for it just opening. I didn't even get in the door. The tax assistance is from 10-1, and they already had a sign on the door saying they were full for the day. I'm guessing people were waiting outside.

So, I'm kind of stuck for a while. I want to get the taxes done so I can do my FAFSA. I may just do an estimated one and revise it later. I have everything I need except for figuring out the American Opportunity Credit vs scholarship money thing. So frustrating.

 

[ctinct]

Ctinct, you might want to call the school's financial aid office and ask them what you should do. I have also heard that scholarship money toward room is taxable, but the student files it on their tax return. If you hear otherwise, would you mind posting it on here?

Linnylu, I just did another quick read-through on the IRS site. It does say that any scholarship money used to pay things other than required books, supplies, tuition, and fees is taxable (I knew that) to you. So, if I were to assume, I would assume the you is the student, since that is who received the money. Which makes me wonder....a couple of her outside scholarships did not say specifically what they were intended to pay. The school listed all its own grant money, her merit scholarship from the school, and her outside scholarships on the 1098T. I wonder if I could say that we designate the outside scholarships to room and board, declare that money on her tax return (which, as of right now, I didn't think she even needed to file a tax return--little income and no taxes withheld), and have her pay the taxes on it. That would free up some money for me to claim for the AOC. I'd get a larger amount back that way and could cover her taxes, and still come out better off because of the AOC. I have no clue, and I'm not about to do it without some sort of tax advice, but it's a thought. I don't even know if that is a possibility since all the outside scholarships are included in the scholarship money on the 1098T, so maybe it is all assumed to be used for tuition. However, to complicate matters even further, the tuition for the YEAR is listed on the form, but only HALF her institutional scholarship money is listed----and with the inclusion of the outside scholarships, that money actually covered more than a half year's tuition.

 

[ctinct]

[Arutha, net scholarship income is reported on the same line as wages, along with a notation to the side indicating the amount and the letters "SCH".

Friedpasta, it's almost always better to have the student report the scholarship income and let the parent take the AOC, up to the AOC limit. Most students are in the 10% federal income tax bracket and the AOC is 25%. File whichever way benefits you the most...there's no need to pay more than the law requires! Copied from another site.]

Sorry to make three posts in a row, but it seems like it might be possible to have the student claim the scholarships (I'm guessing just the taxable portion?), from what I can follow on another board. It probably would benefit us more to do it that way. Off to do more research.

Next week I am going to try a different VITA site for help, a local college's business school. I'll plan to be there an hour or so early.