Help DIS Homeschoolers Help me convince my DH

[KJMAX1]

You might be very qualified, but I bet there's a lot of parents who homeschool just so they can control the agenda, and that they aren't qualified at all. They don't want their children learning certain things, so they keep them out of public schools.

I'm college educated. But I don't kid myself into thinking my DS needs only me for his education. I'll be a cheerleader, advocate and support system, but I want DS out in the world, learning what it takes to get along with kids his own age. I also want him learning from a variety of teachers, not just one. I had a teacher I just despised, and she actually taught me a lot....mainly in how to deal with unfair adversity. That paid off a great deal down the road.

This just floors me...You BET I am going to control what my kid learns and how its taught. I totally disagree with the local High School here who taught the kids how to make meth so they could recognize it and turn people in . A few months later they had to bust up a campus drug ring! I also have a huge beef with the teacher who let the entire 5th grade class without parental knowledge watch Reservoir Dogs. FOR-GET IT. I am not paying some teacher to teach my kid how to run gangs, and make drugs. I dont want to have my child "Fit" into the world that way. I want my kids to hold a higher standard than that for themselves. Dont even get me started on the sex these kids are running around having. The schools ideas is throwing a condom at them and telling them to use it. Even Oprah has had shows on the sex parties, and oral sex on the school buses! How about teaching respect. My kid is not some animal! My children are precious human beings, and they should expect to be treated as such. My best friend teaches at our local high school as a Home Ec, and Health teacher, and she is called so many foul words its outrageous. She cannot discipline the child or remove them either. They are on what's called an "IEP" because they have special needs. Well guess what my special needs 7yr old would NEVER speak like that to a teacher EVER. She calls the police on a few of her students weekly because they come high or drunk to class. We live in a very nice community where kids can afford this stuff. My kids are ethnically diverse as well. I do not believe schools handle diversity well either. Many friends of ours who are African American have pulled their kids out of school because of problems with schools being socially unaware of things that can hurt kids of another race. Most recently my friend dropped by her 4th grade son's school to drop off his lunch and discovered they were watching a movie on predators...the human kind...She said all of the predators were either hispanic or black. Now I have different raced children. How do you think my son being the only child of his race in class would feel if all the other kids saw the "bad man" looking just like him? Not-uh...I am no way throwing my kids to the wolves on that one. Why didnt they bring in a black or hispanic police officer to talk to the kids about the dangers of strangers?? Instead it makes it look like all black or hispanic men are predators. That was poor education on the part of the public school.

You tell me that PS is non-biased? HA...If thats soooooo true why is it that they have a LAW called the "Freedom of Information Act" to protect teachers? Its so that they can teach the children whatever they want as long as they say its THEIR own opinion. My kids can hear anyones argument but you better believe that they will have the knowledge to back up how they feel regardless if they agree with us or not. Teachers dont give them that opportunity most of the time. I want them to be successful at whatever they want to do, and feel that they know as much as possible. I will love my kids regardless of how they agree or disagree with me, but I believe there is a time and a place for everything. I think sending them to a PS would only shelter their ability to learn because its from the same teachers and the same textbooks every single day. There are fantastic teachers in the public school, as well as private, however, not every teacher is interested as much as my husband and I are in our kids education. I believe the local barber who's parents were from a slave plantation, or the gentleman who owns a Cuban restaurant down the road and escaped Cuba on a boat in the 70s can give my kids a much more real picture of how history happened and to me, they are teachers! Neither one of them with degrees. Thank HEAVEN for homeschooling!

 

[jodifla]

This just floors me...You BET I am going to control what my kid learns and how its taught. I totally disagree with the local High School here who taught the kids how to make meth so they could recognize it and turn people in . A few months later they had to bust up a campus drug ring! I also have a huge beef with the teacher who let the entire 5th grade class without parental knowledge watch Reservoir Dogs. FOR-GET IT. I am not paying some teacher to teach my kid how to run gangs, and make drugs. I dont want to have my child "Fit" into the world that way. I want my kids to hold a higher standard than that for themselves. Dont even get me started on the sex these kids are running around having. The schools ideas is throwing a condom at them and telling them to use it. Even Oprah has had shows on the sex parties, and oral sex on the school buses! How about teaching respect. My kid is not some animal! My children are precious human beings, and they should expect to be treated as such. My best friend teaches at our local high school as a Home Ec, and Health teacher, and she is called so many foul words its outrageous. She cannot discipline the child or remove them either. They are on what's called an "IEP" because they have special needs. Well guess what my special needs 7yr old would NEVER speak like that to a teacher EVER. She calls the police on a few of her students weekly because they come high or drunk to class. We live in a very nice community where kids can afford this stuff. My kids are ethnically diverse as well. I do not believe schools handle diversity well either. Many friends of ours who are African American have pulled their kids out of school because of problems with schools being socially unaware of things that can hurt kids of another race. Most recently my friend dropped by her 4th grade son's school to drop off his lunch and discovered they were watching a movie on predators...the human kind...She said all of the predators were either hispanic or black. Now I have different raced children. How do you think my son being the only child of his race in class would feel if all the other kids saw the "bad man" looking just like him? Not-uh...I am no way throwing my kids to the wolves on that one. Why didnt they bring in a black or hispanic police officer to talk to the kids about the dangers of strangers?? Instead it makes it look like all black or hispanic men are predators. That was poor education on the part of the public school.

You tell me that PS is non-biased? HA...If thats soooooo true why is it that they have a LAW called the "Freedom of Information Act" to protect teachers? Its so that they can teach the children whatever they want as long as they say its THEIR own opinion. My kids can hear anyones argument but you better believe that they will have the knowledge to back up how they feel regardless if they agree with us or not. Teachers dont give them that opportunity most of the time. I want them to be successful at whatever they want to do, and feel that they know as much as possible. I will love my kids regardless of how they agree or disagree with me, but I believe there is a time and a place for everything. I think sending them to a PS would only shelter their ability to learn because its from the same teachers and the same textbooks every single day. There are fantastic teachers in the public school, as well as private, however, not every teacher is interested as much as my husband and I are in our kids education. I believe the local barber who's parents were from a slave plantation, or the gentleman who owns a Cuban restaurant down the road and escaped Cuba on a boat in the 70s can give my kids a much more real picture of how history happened and to me, they are teachers! Neither one of them with degrees. Thank HEAVEN for homeschooling!

Thank heaven for homeschooling? With radical parents like you teaching it, it sounds like hell to me.

I didn't say public schools were "non biased" but I DO QUESTION THE CREDENTIALS of parents who think they're the greatest teachers in the world.

You should reread your post to hear how disjointed and paranoid you sound. Let me put it to you this way: Think other parents reading your post would want YOU teaching THEIR kids?

 

[Brier Rose]

It's amazing the pedastals people put themselves on around here. (i.e. I AM GREAT AND I CAN TEACH ANYTHING!)

And I think it's amazing that of all the posters here you choose one to base your opinion on!

How many of us have said that we use sources other than ourselves to teach??

Tutors, Co-op classes, college courses...whatever it takes to not only get the job done, but get it done to the highest degree!

Why do you just ignore what has been written over and over again?

You say you were on the fence about homeschooling, but it seems you already had your mind made up to me.

 

[jodifla]

And I think it's amazing that of all the posters here you choose one to base your opinion on!

How many of us have said that we use sources other than ourselves to teach??

Tutors, Co-op classes, college courses...whatever it takes to not only get the job done, but get it done to the highest degree!

Why do you just ignore what has been written over and over again?

You say you were on the fence about homeschooling, but it seems you already had your mind made up to me.

Since I don't homeschool, and have no plans to, I have stayed away from homeschooling threads in the past. This is one of the few I've visited. But I find this thread eye-opening. I don't assume that all homeschoolers are alike, and I'm sure there are many fine ones.

But the problem that clearly is demonstrated on this thread is the lack of accountability in homeschooling. It seems like some parents are holding their kids virtual prisoners, if not physically, then in the information they'll offer them.

And looking at some of the posts here, which border on raving, makes me sad for kids growing up in these houses. At some point, you have to leave to go to college or on to a job, and you can't take your mom with you.

 

[KJMAX1]

Thank heaven for homeschooling? With radical parents like you teaching it, it sounds like hell to me.

I didn't say public schools were "non biased" but I DO QUESTION THE CREDENTIALS of parents who think they're the greatest teachers in the world.

You should reread your post to hear how disjointed and paranoid you sound. Let me put it to you this way: Think other parents reading your post would want YOU teaching THEIR kids?

Well it goes two ways! Just like you question homeschoolers, I question teachers....Im not paranoid Im educated about what actually takes place in schools. Maybe you ought to visit one, and sit in and see what actually happens. I dont care if parents want me teaching their kids, if I wanted to I would have become a teacher......Heaven knows I can always fall back on that, because as the saying in college goes...."Well if this doesnt work out I can always teach.."

 

[hsmamato2]

Sorry, I don't know anyone who is truly capable of teaching calculus, physics, algebra II, advanced English, comparative literature, etc. Are you going to be their university also? I mean, why stop at high school?

I'm sure it's possible to pull that off at the elementary level, but by the time kids reach high school, I don't see how it's feasible.

I was actually more on the fence about homeschooling until I started reading some of these shocking posts. It's amazing the pedastals people put themselves on around here. (i.e. I AM GREAT AND I CAN TEACH ANYTHING!)

I get the feeling you think b/c we homeschoolers believe so firmly that we're giving our kids the best, that we think that you(who don't homeschool) aren't. That's sad.
Actually, you know that was exactly what my post stated, none of us knows EVERYTHING-and,as already clearly pointed out, most of us do exactly what other rational parents do,make good use of any and all opportunities for our kids to learn.
You obviously believe in the public school system as the way to do that. So sorry if a lot of us no longer believe in this particular thing as a beneficial way to raise kids.
You also may not see how it's feasible, but many have done it, and many more will do it. SUCCESSFULLY.
And...there will be some failures. Just like with anything in life, nothing's perfect. In any educational setting, there will be. I just like the odds in homeschooling a lot better.
What you really need to understand, and I'm not sure you want to, considering the reasonable tone *most* have taken in these posts- which you have called"shocking"-
Our kids are hard wired to learn,grow,and become independent. All of them-
Since when is parental choice a shocking thing? Or to assume, that as a parent, I have no right to have the confidence that I can help my kids to grow and learn,without the aid of a public school system? Why do any of you find this shocking?
I don't have all the answers, I never did, and I never will, that's what the big world is out there for. Our family has unlimited access to that. Since when is that me thinking I'm doing it all alone?

 

[emma'smom]

I could also debate that you know what in school schooling is now. QUOTE]


You could, but this has been my professional research topic for about 15 years now, so you'd probably not win that debate. I DO know what schooling is all about. The fact is that I (personally) am opposed to the entire structure of public school, no matter how "great" the school itself is. I don't want my son being taught what others have decided is important for him to learn, and when. Period. We could live in the best school district in the country, and he still wouldn't go to school. I'm not saying every homeschooling family has the same objections. They don't. But I do understand very well what schooling is all about. Some schools work "okay", and some don't. Most of them have some major problems, from lack of funding to outdated curriculum to horrifically unhealthy cafeteria food. Many homes have the same problems, as well, I'm sure. I'm just saying that homeschoolers tend not to be as ignorant (and I use that in its neutral, literal sense) of public schooling as public school proponents are of homeschooling. Most homeschooling parents I know attended public school themselves, and most of them have had at least one child attend school for some length of time before pulling them out.
I challenge you to show me that most teachers in NY are "fully certified" teachers with Masters degrees. I know for a fact that isn't true. I also think formal education, even at the college level, is vastly overrated by the general population. I took far more than 30 course hours of history classes. I wouldn't consider myself an expert historian, more capable of explaining historical events in context than someone who simply loves history and has learned a lot about it. My husband, who has taken very few history classes in his lifetime, is actually much better at that sort of thing, because of his personal interest and independent study.
And with that, I'm finished!

This is what PRIVATE and CHARTER schools are for. You don't need to homeschool your child if your not happy with public schools. Try a private or charter school that matches your family's personal philosophy! If this is your "professional research topic" (and what does that mean anyway? Your dissertation?) than use it as a catalyst to great a better kind of school!

 

[hsmamato2]

This is what PRIVATE and CHARTER schools are for. You don't need to homeschool your child if your not happy with public schools. Try a private or charter school that matches your family's personal philosophy! If this is your "professional research topic" (and what does that mean anyway? Your dissertation?) than use it as a catalyst to great a better kind of school!

...But what if you truly want to homeschool,not just "not" go to a school, but homeschool? Actually choose it over all other options?
What makes a charter,or private school better? Truly,it is a matter of personal opinion, because you can find both pros and cons published everywhere about both,public,private or homeschooling-The evidence is overwhelming, homeschooling is not harmful to our kids!
That's what people need to understand,even if you refuse to examine real evidence that it's actually a great thing, that it's been PROVEN,time has borne it out, homeschooling has no 'anti-socializing' effects on normal kids who grow up with it- just the opposite is being proven all the time-
Besides, all those off season vacation prices are too cool to miss out on!

 

[noodleknitter]

Since I don't homeschool, and have no plans to, I have stayed away from homeschooling threads in the past. This is one of the few I've visited. But I find this thread eye-opening. I don't assume that all homeschoolers are alike, and I'm sure there are many fine ones.

But the problem that clearly is demonstrated on this thread is the lack of accountability in homeschooling. It seems like some parents are holding their kids virtual prisoners, if not physically, then in the information they'll offer them.

And looking at some of the posts here, which border on raving, makes me sad for kids growing up in these houses. At some point, you have to leave to go to college or on to a job, and you can't take your mom with you.

Actually I don't know of any state that does not hold their homeschoolers accountable. And I do know that statistically the homeschoolers are out preforming those students in the public school system. So, it seems that people would rather believe their fairy tale perceptions of what their children are learning in school than look at the facts. Pure and simple. Everyone thinks it is some other school bringing down the scores.

While you feel sad for kids here, I feel sad for the kids that are sitting in classes bored out of their skulls while the teachers struggle to teach those that are behind, or are behind, and the teacher will not slow down to allow them to understand. If they are receiving less information, it must not be pertinent!

I've never known a HS student to have anymore difficulty adjusting to college than all of those good partying students coming for the regular schools. I've never had anyone sent to me for counseling because they didn't understand a "lecture class" arrangement, nor for following the herds into binge drinking. Have had many come into college already sporting alcohol and drug addiction, lack of study habits, inability to get along with their room-mates. But I am certain that you would not choose to listen to those facts either.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

This just floors me...You BET I am going to control what my kid learns and how its taught. I totally disagree with the local High School here who taught the kids how to make meth so they could recognize it and turn people in . A few months later they had to bust up a campus drug ring! I also have a huge beef with the teacher who let the entire 5th grade class without parental knowledge watch Reservoir Dogs. FOR-GET IT. I am not paying some teacher to teach my kid how to run gangs, and make drugs. I dont want to have my child "Fit" into the world that way. I want my kids to hold a higher standard than that for themselves. Dont even get me started on the sex these kids are running around having. The schools ideas is throwing a condom at them and telling them to use it. Even Oprah has had shows on the sex parties, and oral sex on the school buses! How about teaching respect. My kid is not some animal! My children are precious human beings, and they should expect to be treated as such. My best friend teaches at our local high school as a Home Ec, and Health teacher, and she is called so many foul words its outrageous. She cannot discipline the child or remove them either. They are on what's called an "IEP" because they have special needs. Well guess what my special needs 7yr old would NEVER speak like that to a teacher EVER. She calls the police on a few of her students weekly because they come high or drunk to class. We live in a very nice community where kids can afford this stuff. My kids are ethnically diverse as well. I do not believe schools handle diversity well either. Many friends of ours who are African American have pulled their kids out of school because of problems with schools being socially unaware of things that can hurt kids of another race. Most recently my friend dropped by her 4th grade son's school to drop off his lunch and discovered they were watching a movie on predators...the human kind...She said all of the predators were either hispanic or black. Now I have different raced children. How do you think my son being the only child of his race in class would feel if all the other kids saw the "bad man" looking just like him? Not-uh...I am no way throwing my kids to the wolves on that one. Why didnt they bring in a black or hispanic police officer to talk to the kids about the dangers of strangers?? Instead it makes it look like all black or hispanic men are predators. That was poor education on the part of the public school.

You tell me that PS is non-biased? HA...If thats soooooo true why is it that they have a LAW called the "Freedom of Information Act" to protect teachers? Its so that they can teach the children whatever they want as long as they say its THEIR own opinion. My kids can hear anyones argument but you better believe that they will have the knowledge to back up how they feel regardless if they agree with us or not. Teachers dont give them that opportunity most of the time. I want them to be successful at whatever they want to do, and feel that they know as much as possible. I will love my kids regardless of how they agree or disagree with me, but I believe there is a time and a place for everything. I think sending them to a PS would only shelter their ability to learn because its from the same teachers and the same textbooks every single day. There are fantastic teachers in the public school, as well as private, however, not every teacher is interested as much as my husband and I are in our kids education. I believe the local barber who's parents were from a slave plantation, or the gentleman who owns a Cuban restaurant down the road and escaped Cuba on a boat in the 70s can give my kids a much more real picture of how history happened and to me, they are teachers! Neither one of them with degrees. Thank HEAVEN for homeschooling!

Gosh! You make your PS sound like some crazy commune! I will agree that I will have a huge hand in my children's education and I have not picked a side here because I think different things work for different kids. That being said you are placing blame for these kid's awful behavior on the school system?!!! You have got to be kidding me?!!! Where is the parent's accountability? If my kids cursed at a teacher you can bet your disney dollars that they would be in so much trouble their head would spin!!! Also- the school's throwing condoms at kids? Again- sex education is a parent's responsibility. Unfortunately many parent's aren't doing their job or maybe they are as you can't always make every choice for your child and kids are having kids. I don't know how I feel about condoms in school yet but if I think they are trying to at least protect those kids who are having sex from having babies or getting diseases. There are many kids who can't go to their parents. THAT is a travesty. No I would not have my child participate in how to make Meth but I can assure you that they are not teaching that where I live. The parents are super involved over here and that would never even be a consideration. So I agree with you on that point. Completely irresponsible. Coming to class high or drunk? Again- WHERE ARE THE PARENTS???!!!!! I don't neccesarily (sp?) think the problem is the school, I think we come from a generation of "not my child" parents. If my Mom got a call from the school you can bet I was in trouble. She never made excuses for bad behavior no matter what lame reason I could come up with. Nowadays I see many parents who don't believe that their child could have actually done something wrong. It makes me so mad because in the long run they are only hurting their child. Now I don't have a problem with PS or HS. As I previuosly stated I think that each child is different and what may work for one may not work for another. DH and I have talked about this at length and have agreed that when the time comes for our kids to start school (PS) (one in pre-k now!) that if we feel things aren't working out and private school isn't working either then we will homeschool. Personally I think they will be fine. We plan on being very involved. So I am not picking sides but reading your post you sound like a very angry person who only wants your kids to learn a one sided view of things. I hope I am wrong because you speak of racism but I get a distinct impression that that is what you are teaching your kids. Again- I hope I am wrong.

 

[noodleknitter]

BTW, we homeschool for a variety of reasons, social, religious, academic... Do you know what convinced me to homeschool? I was an elementary ed major in college!

Best of luck to the OP with whatever you decide.

We chose to homeschool after I spent several years as the consulting psychologist in our local public school system. Between the chaos in the classrooms and the horrid attitudes of too many of the teachers it was a "no-brainer!" I had spent several years ragging on my bro and his wife for homeschooling theirs, btw.

Crow is not a tasty meal!

 

[jodifla]

Actually I don't know of any state that does not hold their homeschoolers accountable. And I do know that statistically the homeschoolers are out preforming those students in the public school system. So, it seems that people would rather believe their fairy tale perceptions of what their children are learning in school than look at the facts. Pure and simple. Everyone thinks it is some other school bringing down the scores.

While you feel sad for kids here, I feel sad for the kids that are sitting in classes bored out of their skulls while the teachers struggle to teach those that are behind, or are behind, and the teacher will not slow down to allow them to understand. If they are receiving less information, it must not be pertinent!

I've never known a HS student to have anymore difficulty adjusting to college than all of those good partying students coming for the regular schools. I've never had anyone sent to me for counseling because they didn't understand a "lecture class" arrangement, nor for following the herds into binge drinking. Have had many come into college already sporting alcohol and drug addiction, lack of study habits, inability to get along with their room-mates. But I am certain that you would not choose to listen to those facts either.

As I said, I'm sure there are many fine homeschool setups, just as there are many find public and private schools.

But just because someone decides to homeschool, doesn't mean they are automatically some great parent or even qualified to homeschool their kids. Looking carefully at some of these posts convinces me of that.

And as far as the "facts" you claim I choose not to listen to: My point is that all kids have to join the real world at some point. I think well before college is better than showing up at college without having traditional classroom setting experience.

Just because you don't homeschool doesn't mean you don't parent, or supplement what kids learn at school.

 

[DiznEeyore]

My point is that all kids have to join the real world at some point. I think well before college is better than showing up at college without having traditional classroom setting experience.

As any adult recently out of college (or my college-instructor husband) could tell you, there is little in the classroom that relates to "the real world". And just because a child is homeschooled, doesn't mean he or she doesn't spend time in classroom settings. My son takes classes through the local community college's Kids on Campus program every summer.

Our son has been in public and private school. When we enrolled him in private school, I'd been homeschooling him for 3 years. He was in the 4th grade and tested at the high school level in many areas. He spent the next 3 years in school (we moved him to public after the 4th grade). At the end of 6th grade, he asked to be homeschooled again, and that is what we've done. I have to tell you that his skills after spending time in school had diminished significantly, and we've had to spend a lot of time playing catch-up.

His school didn't have any control over the kids (I don't blame the teachers -- I blame the way the kids are raised these days). At conferences, his (male) social studies teacher informed us that he often had to line the kids up in the hallway against the lockers for 15 minutes to get them to settle down enough that he could teach. There weren't enough books for the kids to take out of the classroom, let alone home to study! Plus my son was surly every day when he got home ... he was miserable there.

Now that he's back being homeschooled, his attitude and grades have improved immensely. And far from being "socially ********", he's the most outgoing kid I know. He has friends he sees all the time from church, school and ones that just live down the street. He's also very capable of dealing with adults on a polite, mature level.

He mows lawns for several neighbors and has a pretty decent work ethic (for a teenager, LOL!).

We're homeschooling again next year, and then for high school, we're planning to enroll him in a distance academy (through the same program we currently use) that uses books and DVDs for everyday teaching and will allow him access to teachers at any time via phone or internet. And of course he'll have immediate access to his dad and me for assistance.

The only way we as homeschoolers can break through the ignorant stereotypes that so many hold is just to keep on doing what we're doing: producing high-quality individuals that contribute much to society. Eventually the "rest of the world" will come around.

 

[Reese]

I've been homschooling for six years now. Tonite is our DS's grade 8 graduation.

Over the years we have had the socialization question posed to us by family, friends and strangers alike. My children live in the real world surrounded by life interactions. Some of those involve other homeschoolers (trips, ballet, get togethers, friends), others involve public schooled children (soccer, gymnastics, Brownies/Scouts, friends) and yet others involve the general public (church, librarians, cashiers, bank tellers). In each of these interactions they learn about socialization. Each time they process what works and what doesn't and carry it forth for next time. This is the same process as children in public schools. The difference is as homeschoolers they are not segregated by age as is true for real life. My friends and co-workers are not people my own age.

Even as an adult when approaching a new social situation where we don't know what to expect we can feel uneasy. We learn and react to our situation. Within my own family I've noticed that my children socialize differenty in different situations. This is because they have gone through the trial and error process and learned social skills in doing so.

As for homeschooling in general. I feel the most important things I can do for my children is not teach them. I am giving them the tools to learn. I promote curiousity and creativity, within which they explore and learn. My DS at the age of 10 wanted to know how to create a web page. He found HTML codes and learned how to apply these things and many others and created his own web page. I have awoke to find letters written to me in heiroglyphics that I have had to translate. I have had the most challenging games of chess and mario cart. I have also learned Spanish along with the children. I have confidence that when the time comes that he decides to go to school that because of his ability and enthusiasm to learn that he will be able to perform. As for socially he has gained experience and has a variety of friends both of which he can draw from.

 

[Maybelle]

ok, I must admit that I could not put myself through the torture of reading all the posts, just the first page got me riled!

The "socialization" issue is the age all argument against homeschooling, so I kind of feel like, here we go again!

I am a home schooler for the past 3 years of my 1, get that, only 1 child. I also am a public school teacher for the past 15 years.So I feel that I have quite a good background here.

First off, home schooling is really HARD! Kids always listen better to someone who is not their parent, so there are always struggles. That being said, I believe that I am the best teacher my DD could have, as I have a vested interest in her progress. We chose too homeschool for many reasons. PM me if you would like clarification.

As for socialization...

There is a difference between being "socialized" and being "social" that most people do not consider when discussing this issue. If you go into ANY public school classoom, you will find many kids who are socialized and quite social, but you will also find many kids who are very social, but poorly socialized.

Social refers to taking part socially with peers and others. Socialization though, is the ability to follow accepted rules of a society for conduct. People lump these two together and classify it as socialization, I think.

While it is important for children to have friends, and be able to participate with a peer group, the more imprtant facet of their development is for them to grow up to be productive members of the socitey.

In my humble experience, I have met very few "unsocialized" homeschool kids, and yet I have met VERY MANY children in the public schools I have worked in that I would NOT let my daughter hang out with. I have also met VERY MANY public school kids who are not very social. This is often a character or personality trait.

To sum up...In my experience, not all, certainly, but MOST homeschool kids are very well socialized, and very social. Because of the flexibility that homeschooling provides, these kids often experience MORE real life experiences that public school kids sitting in a contrived classroom.

Soory so ling, just my opinion.

 

[hsmamato2]

But just because someone decides to homeschool, doesn't mean they are automatically some great parent or even qualified to homeschool their kids. Looking carefully at some of these posts convinces me of that.

And as far as the "facts" you claim I choose not to listen to: My point is that all kids have to join the real world at some point. I think well before college is better than showing up at college without having traditional classroom setting experience.

Just because you don't homeschool doesn't mean you don't parent, or supplement what kids learn at school.

Ummm, I actually haven't read any personal posts here that have indicated a lack of qualifications to homeschool by any of these parents, I've read a couple of third hand stories which may or may not be true...which basically have nothing to do with what we, the actual people doing it, are saying.
As I mentioned already, you seem to assume that b/c we've chosen this, we think poorly of the rest of you who haven't- we don't consider ourselves better parents, this is the choice we've made,just as you're making yours.It's a personal thing. So... impossible for one person to make for another...that's the whole point,you get to decide to send your kids to ______school, I get to decide to keep my kids out of any school.
And also, a few posts back, someone was shocked that anyone could blame the schools for kids rotten behavior...well, these 3rd hand stories claim to do just that- "if only these kids weren't homeschooled,they'd be JUST fine." It really doesn't seem right,in either direction to say that...it really is family environment that's going to make the biggest difference in how kids grow up...no matter the school choices...

 

[FayeW]

I agree with the OP's husband. Whenever I hear of somebody wanting to homeschool I think to myself "Why would you do that to your child??!" Unless the child has learning or social issues that make coping in the school system difficult I think that homeschooling will make your child appear "odd" to other children.

For some parents, I think they use homeschooling to justify being a SAHM.

 

[BobsGirl]

I haven't read through all the replies but here is my two cents.

I homeschooled my children for 3 years. K-2 for my daughter and just K for my son. Then we felt they really needed the socialization with other kids that they were not getting. I live in a small community and not a lot for them to get involved in unless they go to PS. So we started them in PS, my daughter went into 3rd and my son into 1st. Let me tell you it was a culture shock for them. They did not know how to interact with the other students at all. The school and kids were wonderful with them but my kids didn't know how to handle this enviorment. Though I loved being able to teach them and give them probably a better eduction then the PS, if I had a choice I would not have done it all over again. I would have sent them to PS from the start. This has been my one regret with my children. They have just finished there 2nd year of public school and they still have problems interacting. I have them involved with sports and such but they are so backwards. I see it starting to turn a bit but it just breaks my heart to watch them with other children and feel as though I have failed them in some respect. It really is upsetting.

This is just my experiences with my children, all situations are different and if you are able to get them involved and a lot of extracirricular activities then it would probably be completely diff. for you but we didn't have that opportunity.

 

[DiznEeyore]

I agree with the OP's husband. Whenever I hear of somebody wanting to homeschool I think to myself "Why would you do that to your child??!" Unless the child has learning or social issues that make coping in the school system difficult I think that homeschooling will make your child appear "odd" to other children.

For some parents, I think they use homeschooling to justify being a SAHM.

How insulting. You obviously know nothing about homeschooling.

"WHY WOULD I DO THAT TO [MY] CHILD?" Um ... because I LOVE him and want the BEST for him -- how's that for a reason?

Maybe *your* idea of what's best is overcrowded classrooms, not enough books to go around, children jumping on desks like animals, security cameras in the hallways, locked bathrooms, substandard test scores .... but that's sure not mine.

Oh, and most of the kids that my son hangs out with that are public-schooled tell him all the time that he's "so lucky" to be homeschooled. So no, they don't think of him as "odd".

And as far as using it to "justify" being a SAHM, let me tell you something ... I loved working; being a homemaker is not my forte. I do it because it is a SACRIFICE (financial and otherwise) that I gladly make because I love my child and want what is best for him.

 

[Maybelle]

I've gotten very angry and insulted by some of these posts. People need to take the time to truly investigate ANY decision they make as far as their child's schooling goes.

Please don't attempt to imply that I am causing my child to be perceived as "odd," as I am pretty sure you do not know her, nor any of her friends, who adore her and play with her on a daily basis. Just as I won't classify your child as a behavior problem because he/she is in public school.

To state that home schooling is a way to justify being a SAHM is one of the most insulting things I have ever heard of. Are you saying that one needs and EXCUSE to be home with her children. I can't believe you would even have the nerve to post that!

And BTW, I have had an incredible amount of support from fellow public school educators who have admitted to the fact that they wished they could pull their kids out and home school them.

While I have a first-hand knowledge of both the good and bad that the public schools have to offer, I will defend to the death the right of those who don't, to still make the decision they feel is best for their child. Liberty is what this country is all aout, after all.

Let's all get off our high horses here and realize that we all love our children and want the best for them. How we go about their schooling may differ, but we all want our children to be productive members of society in the long run. Isn't that the goal. We need to be open minded to the fact that not one way fits all, and be willing to see the good in the choices others make for their child's eduction.

I will always defend the right of any child to homeschool, but I would never put someone down for not making that decision either. It is ok to debate the issue, but too many comments in this thread have gotten too personal, let's consider each other's feelings and clean things up a bit.

JMHO