Guess what? They cancelled 7 days out!

[TammyNC]

Sorry for this dilema happening to you. It makes me think twice about asking people to go with us. I dont think people really consider the consequences it causes when they back out. It puts DVCers in a bad position. I hope that everything works out for you all the way around.

 

[RuthnPaul]

Originally posted by TammyNC
It makes me think twice about asking people to go with us. I dont think people really consider the consequences it causes when they back out.

We have found this to be true also when recently trying to rent points to non-DVC members. They don't necessarily understand how the point system works and trying to explain why my cancellation/refund policies are structured the way they are was a bit of a challenge...

 

[kathleena]

Oh FreeTime - I was wondering about your mess the other day - I remembered you were going around the same time as us!

I'm sorry this has ended up this way - although couldn't we all see the freight train on it's way! Good luck with your options, and call MS !!!!

 

[FreeTime]

Thanks for all of the responses everyone! You will never guess what happened now! They called us and didn't apologize and told us that we still owe them the tickets and the room and they will find their own way. I wouldn't have given them a thing. But they are DH's family and he said "fine, take it and don't ever expect me to do anything for you again." Can you believe that?! They expect to go on their own and worse DH agreed! I have to give him credit though because he said the gift was for their kids too, and the kids can't help it that they have stupid, selfish (no, they have not said thank you) parents. And of course we will always be the table family that ruined their only vacation that they ever got, one way or another. So now I feel that my trip is ruined. DH says it is not because now we can go and do what we want and not have to worry about them asking for more when we get there and we can have a good ole time with just us. I want to try to find something in the DC so I can be as far away from them as possible. DH says "why should we punish ourselves any more then we are already being punished by being cramped when we have a 2br at OKW."
I just had to vent!!!!!!!! DVC was never menat to be a nightmare!

 

[LIFERBABE]

Part of me agrees with your DH.

What's done is done. Let them have it and let them go. Only because there are children involved. If not I would tell them to stuff it!

But anyways, You should go and stay where you had planned. You will be on totally different schedules and most likely will not see them even if you are staying at the same resort or in the same park. Have you ever tried to find someone you wanted to find at WDW? It's tough! You won't even be looking for them and if you see them wave, smile and keep on going!

This could have been their sinister plan all along. Cause a commotion at the last minute so you wouldnt have to be together. My Dh's cousins did this to us our first trip to WDW. She needed us the first couple of days because her DH couldnt join us til later. She expected us to delay our vacation until he got there! Then when he did arrive, she fell out with us about where to eat, and we didnt see them the rest of the trip. We were supposed to follow each other back (drove from Texas) but they got up early and left us to clean up the offsite Villa! The next year we joined DVC so we wouldnt have to share a unit with anyone else if we didnt want to and have been back 6 times to their zero! Every family function we have, I make sure I mention WDW and what a great time we had and how we can't wait to go back in (fill in the blank) LOL! NEVER AGAIN!

 

[rocketriter]

Later, when the pressure is off, gently educate your DH on the necessity of working with you as a team before making decisions. Our extended family can be difficult and my wife's making arrangements or concessions without consulting me caused more than one fight early in our marriage. Now we work together and things go much better.

Your DH needed to either follow your wishes or get you to actually buy into his before giving in to the relatives' demands. The fact that he acted on his own has now put you into a position that is emotionally uncomfortable. It really isn't a question of who's right. It's a question of which is the dominant family in your life, you plus your husband or your husband plus his relatives.

 

[Beca]

Originally posted by rocketriter


Your DH needed to either follow your wishes or get you to actually buy into his before giving in to the relatives' demands. The fact that he acted on his own has now put you into a position that is emotionally uncomfortable. It really isn't a question of who's right. It's a question of which is the dominant family in your life, you plus your husband or your husband plus his relatives.

Wow!! Well said!!



Beca

 

[lenshanem]

Wow, I'm so sorry to hear this. I remember your original post, too.

 

[dis-happy]

Wow, sorry to hear about the continuing saga. Oh well, you are going to be related to these people for a long time probably, so sometimes it's better in the end if you do things the nice way, even if they don't deserve it. You will look like saints to the rest of the family, I'm sure.

This is one of those times, knowing you own DVC and will be returning to WDW, plus you are not in dire bankruptcy state, and in general your life is way better than theirs, so you can say:
LIVING WELL IS THE BEST REVENGE!
(mutter it under your breath a few times next week)


Now, let's get busy. Are they staying in one of your DVC rooms? Can you call MS and make some location requests for their room in the WORST LOCATION??? Parking lot view, near the garbage cans, where the busses warm up in the morning. LOL!!!!

One more tip: make sure their KTTW card doesn't get linked to your cc.

 

[Beca]

Originally posted by dis-happy

Now, let's get busy. Are they staying in one of your DVC rooms? Can you call MS and make some location requests for their room in the WORST LOCATION??? Parking lot view, near the garbage cans, where the busses warm up in the morning. LOL!!!!

Heehee!!! Where's the dumpster view when you need it??
!!!!



Beca

 

[goldilocks_63]

I think there is some kind of discount on the All Sports, and movies....

If you do have to provide accomodations, maybe the cheapest and away from your resort would be best......

Just an idea, Goldi

 

[Bella2000]

Wow. I was just wondering about your situation since we currently have a 2 bedroom for the three of us due to a last minute cancel. Oh well. Too bad they got to your husband first. I would have told them that it was already canceled and they were on their own. Well, it does reaffirm why only 2 people in our family know that we own.

 

[CRSNDSNY]

I'm so sorry you're still going through all of this. I sincerely hope that you and your family are able to have a magical vacation nonetheless. I hope you don't run into them at all and that you can forget about the troubles leading up to your trip for a while.

 

[dianeschlicht]

Why is it that some folks have to take more than is offered? What on earth made them think they were "entitled" to a car as well? I would have said the accommodations would have been plenty, not to mention the tickets!

 

[kathleena]

Oh, man - just when you think your story can't possibly get any worse. They get mad at you and you "owe" them?

I do agree it's best to bite the bullet and give it to them and move on. And you do need to get your DH to work with you.

Best wishes for a great vacation. I wish I knew who you were as I would love to give you a big 'ole hug if I walk by you at WDW next week!

 

[manning]

Something like this happened to a relative of mine (not Disney, but same conditions). It was the husband's family. He stood up for his wife. It is the best marriage I have seen to date.

And of course we will always be the table family that ruined their only vacation that they ever got, one way or another.

Don't give it a second thought. You will be surprised how many of the relatives know the truth. The more they talk, the more the fool they will appear.

Just remember something. The more you hate someone, the more they control you. Move on and forget them.

If you run into them at Disney, be polite give them a glad you are having a good time. Sorry we have other plans and can't get together, bye. It will drive them nuts. Might even spoil THEIR vacation!!

 

[goldilocks_63]

Hope it goes well.

Best wishes, Goldi

 

[Lexxiefern]

You are a way bigger person than I am. I would call and cancel that ressies right away. There is no way I would let them have it after how mean they have been to you. I hope you have a wonderful trip and do not run into them at all.

 

[eileenfk]

Originally posted by LIFERBABE
Part of me agrees with your DH.

What's done is done. Let them have it and let them go. Only because there are children involved. If not I would tell them to stuff it!

...

I think that if it were me, I would try to find a way to take the kids, and leave the grown-ups home.
A few years ago, I took some neighbor children to DisneyLand.
Their mom's boyfreind wanted me to spend my money to pay off their car, instead. He tried to tell me that if I was going to spend that much money on his girlfriends family, I should spend it to pay off their car. Of course I said no, and instead used the money to take the kids to DisneyLand.

There are some grown-ups who use children to manipulate their own situation.

I currently have an (otherwise) homeless woman and 4 of her children living with me. (These are the same children I took to DisneyLand a few years ago).
They have been here 6 months, and it is starting to look like they will be here at least a few months longer. She lost her H.U.D. by breaking the rules. I have asked myself why I do this. I tell myself it is because of the children.
The mom has minimal (although improved) respect for rules, is selfish and manipulating. Her children are learning from her example.
She knows I care about her kids and uses this to manipulate me. I know she does this, and I am too stupid (or care too much about the children) to stop it.

I am now very concerned about leaving them in my home while I go to WDW. But I would feel really bad sending them to a homeless shelter for Christmas.

I have considered taking the kids to WDW with me (not their mom) but this would not be fair to my brother and his family.

This was really my brother's vacation, and I sort of hijacked it and forced him to modify his plans, from staying in the Value resort to staying at Saratoga Springs (after comparing the resorts, he seems to not mind my doing this as long as he is allowed to pay me back at least some of my cost .

As I read posts, of people who have issues with their families expectations, I feel really fortunate to have a wonderful family who is appreciative for what I do give them, and does not ever expect me to give them anything.

- Eileen

 

[lenshanem]

Eileen, wow you're an angel!