Give it to me straight: Taking the in-laws to Disney. How do you mentally prepare?

[Fantasmic23]

What a coincidence!
He was such a good sport! Everytime we were having group photos taken (like at 'Ohana, Chef Mickey's, Photopass, etc.) he would take it out of his ECV basket & throw it across his other shirt. That way, it looked like he was wearing it in the group photo! It actually looks great in most of the pics!

Awwww!!

 

[roscoepc1]

That is a great idea, actually. Thanks! MIL doesn't wear t-shirts of any kind (Strictly blouses), but I will see what I find. FIL loves t-shirts and would be a really good sport about wearing them ... Especially if they have Donald Duck (his favorite) on them.

I also thought about presenting them with a book and/or Walt Disney World-themed documentary, but I don't want to drop too much Disney on them.

It wouldn't have to be t-shirts...find some pretty blouses, then put the logo on the front pocket....or make something with a "stripe" pattern that could bracket the button placket or something....

Definitely different rooms, possibly different itineraries for some days...what's on in Feb? Not time yet for the Festival of flowers...just wondering if there's something along those lines that would tweak mil's interest?

Honestly, if mil HATES surprises? I'd find some way to warn her there's one coming, but say you can't say more than that without hurting dh....

 

[ktlm]

From the way you have described them, it actually sounds like you will have a great time. When MIL gets tired of walking and rides, if you are at MK, just drop her off at the Main Street shops and then meet her later. If you are at Epcot, she can spend all her time at Mousegears while you are in Future World, and then can have a fantastic time wandering WS and shopping all the different places while you are on that side of the park. We did a week with my Mom (high maintenance) and then to play fair for grandparent time with DD did a week with the in-laws 6 month later. I was a little worried about a week with the in-laws at WDW, because we don't travel the same at all. They are sitters, and we are doers. They are happy sitting in a hotel room for hours on end, while we usually are only there to sleep. We had a fantastic time with them. We told them going in that we had one TS meal a day booked for all of us, and other than that if they didn't feel like keeping up with us they did not have too. MIL wound up having to rent an ECV because of an old injury, but they actually kept up with us most of the time and had a blast. When they got tired (or tired of us), which wasn't often (I can only think of twice) , they would just leave us and go back to the resort. It was a great trip. No stress or disagreements at all.

Now my Mom was not the easiest to travel with (she is constantly worried about something....DD is too cold, too hot, hasn't had a drink in an hour, is hungry, lunch is too late etc.), but we still had lots of fun. The way to get through it if it goes that way is deep breaths and lots of Grey Goose slushes at Epcot.

Both trips we had separate rooms that connected. I would recommend staying on WDW property, especially if you will not be in separate vehicles, because that makes it easier for them to grab transportation and just go back to the resort (or anyplace else) if they want, and meet back later.

 

[grafxgirl]

We take a trip every year with my husbands parents, brother, brother's girlfriend, and sometimes a few of the cousins. What helps us is having our own space. We each rent our own villas. We don't spend every moment with each other either. As a family, we do plan to spend time all together riding certain rides, going to certain shows, and of course table service dinners. Throughout the day, we split up into smaller groups and do our own thing for the most part because we each have our own "things" that we like to do, but we always come together for dinner each night, then hit the parks after dinner for EMH as a family. The other thing that makes it easy is we all have cell phones that we carry so we are constant contact throughout the day with calls or texting, and if we find we are within the same area, we might try to meet up for a short time.

 

[grafxgirl]

We take a trip every year with my husbands parents, brother, brother's girlfriend, and sometimes a few of the cousins. What helps us is having our own space. We each rent our own villas, we don't spend every moment with each other either. As a family, we do plan to spend time all together riding certain rides, going to certain shows, and of course we table service dinners. Throughout the day, we split up into smaller groups and do our own thing for the most part, but we always come together for dinner each night, then hit the parks after dinner for EMH as a family.

 

[HappyPeach]

I've been with my ILs numerous times. It's been mostly great. I think the key is to remember that you are not shackled together. You can split up. If MIL does not like crowds and walking then let her stay at the resort and go to the pool or to one of the spas or to downtown disney (or whatever they're renaming it) or the Boardwalk. She could go see a show like La Nouba or a movie. A Disney vacation where you are staying at a Disney resort can be magical without ever stepping foot in the parks. Instead of paying for a park pass, that money could pay for her to enjoy other aspects of the Resort. Then you could all meet for dinner. She could do things like the bonfire at Fort Wilderness or other evening resort special things. Part of the enjoyment of the trip may just be in seeing each other at night and sharing your days.

 

[JerseyMamaBear]

Budget money for a lot of alcohol.

I was just about to suggest the same thing. I can't eve get through xmas without her opening her mouth about something. Have a wonderful trip and enjpy

 

[sunnyday123]

You've received a lot of good suggestions here, so really the only thing I can suggest is Vodka. Lots and lots of vodka.

 

[bam1004]

Patience and remember it is your trip too. We went with my in-laws in 08 and it went well, but we split up alot and met up for lunch or dinner so we could do the things that we wanted to do.
Vodka won't hurt either!!! Have a good trip!

 

[Captain_Hook]

In addition to all the other great suggestions -- trip insurance

 

[Yubbie]

I'd probably start by making funeral arrangements...but I won't say for who.

 

[Karenj2]

I'll be honest - we almost had this same situation for our upcoming trip (next week!), and the solution that we came up with was that we asked my MIL to come, and DH asked my FIL NOT to come... Don't get me wrong, we love my FIL, but he hates crowds, doesn't like amusement parks, hates "wasting" money, etc. and we just knew he wouldn't enjoy himself. The only reason he wanted to go was because it will be DD's first Disney trip, but he'd have been happier just sitting at the hotel with a newspaper.

Anyway, we haven't done it yet, but my MIL will be going down with us. She could also care less about the rides (although she'll do whatever our DD can do), but she'll be fine as long as she can be near her granddaughter...

Anyway, I wanted to wish you luck!!

 

[quasar4legs]

We did 10 days in wdw with my in-laws and it worked out fine, they enjoyed spending time with their grandson (he was 7 at the time).
I like to be at the parks at rope drop so after the first 2 days of early starts my in-laws decided to meet us later in the morning.
For us the success of the trip was based on not trying to keep the group together 24/7.

Have a great trip

 

[SoonerSarah]

We are taking our first trip as a family (DH went with band in HS and with parents when he was younger).

MIL, FIL and BIL (he is 32 lives on his own) are going. My parents might be going. We will drive to MIL's house and take the rest of the trip together from there. We are renting a 6 bedroom villa. Pretty much all of our vacation time is spent with family members (we don't live close), and we for the most part get along really well. FIL is the problem, as he is cheap, but he is going along for the ride and he will be helpful. We will likely stay together the entire time. BIL doesn't have a "family" and completely loves my girls, FIL can be good, and in activity settings is pretty good, and MIL LOVES Disney.

I have a wonderful relationship with MIL, and we spend time together without DH. If she could swing it, we would probably take a trip to disney with the girls and no men actually. She is so excited about the trip that when we were looking at where we would stay, and I found our villa (Storytime Kingdom--has princess and toy story rooms), she said she didn't care what it cost, that we had to stay there and she would make up any additional cost. But for us, it's cheaper than staying in a value resort.

Anyway, FIL is rather cheap. I have been very upfront about costs the entire time, and we are doing our best to make sure that we can save money where we can (such as our tickets are cheaper than originally thought because FIL is an IBM employee).

We are really looking forward to our trip, even FIL. Perhaps that will change afterwards, but I expect FIL to be on his normal behavior.

I however, would never spring that kind of a trip on anyone.

 

[Principessa1284]

As others have offered, may I suggest a couple nice bottles of wine? A perfect excuse to visit world showcase at Epcot. Oh, and possibly a lawyer of some sort? I first (and only) time I brought my (almost) inlaws to the park, MIL didn't see the issue with bringing her handgun into the park. I just saw her go into a blind panic before the security check (she didn't know there would be one, apparently) and run back towards the car. At that point, I don't know what she did with it as I was taken away from the situation so there would be no murder committed. It was the day before my wedding and the woman had already driven me to the highest peak.

So I say.. good luck! It couldn't possibly be any worse than mine! Lots of free time and few obligations/set plans along with ROOMS FAR AWAY should have things work out just nicely. You can bribe the front desk CMs with candy to have you "accidentally" blocked far away from theirs when it comes time to check in, especially if they're the kind to want connecting rooms. Not that I would know that. ahem.

 

[DuckMom]

I haven't read all the other posts, so forgive me if I repeat things. We went with ILs in June and it was horrible until I put my foot down about some family alone time. I am not a big fan of my ILs to begin with ... the feeling is mutual ... so I was a bit on edge the whole time, but it really impacted all of us. DH and I were biting off eachother's heads, etc. My ILs really felt we all needed to stay together all the time ... waiting outside the bathrooms kind of togetherness. After three days, I finally had DH call them when we were all back from the parks, getting ready for bed, and say " we will meet you at MK at noon for lunch." We got up, left before they were up and went by ourselves. Best morning of the trip!

I would say, be prepared for running late, missing buses, etc because you can't wrangle your ILs the way you can your kids. I started lying about ADR times for breakfasts because we were cutting it way too close.

Take lots of wine ... and try to have fun!

 

[spacemountainmom]

We're running into the same kind of situation. We've taken four trips with my entire family. It can be very grating. We learned early on that we just needed to split up at times. I think my dad wanted us to stay together most of the time, but fortunately he figured out pretty quickly that it just was not going to work. My parents have had some serious health issues and just can't keep the pace my family does. My sister's kids are much younger and it works better for everyone if they all stay together and we go and do our thing. We meet up with them several times a day and do some of the shows and kiddie rides and usually have at least one meal with them.

My oldest is in high school and it has gotten harder to take her out of school for trips. My dh and I decided that we would go this year and probably won't be able to go again for at least a few years. My parents and sister ended up not being able to go this year so we will go alone. It will seem weird to not have everyone there, but have decided it will be fun to just be on our on schedule and not have to worry about anyone else.

A few days ago my mil calls and is talking to my dh. Mil and Fil live in Atlanta now and we only see them once a year. We are less than two weeks from leaving and now they decide they want to come down and join us for a few days. They wanted to do this on our last trip and then backed out when dh told them that my entire family would be there with us. Obviously, they will not be staying at our hotel and will not be there the whole time, but I am a little bummed out. My mil and fil have been to WDW several times, but they always left my dh at home. They moved across the country to live by dh's sister 11 years ago and never have a whole lot of time for my kids. I really cannot figure out why they even want to come.

It seems mean, but I would just rather they let us be. However, I guess I will just smile and make the best of it. Hopefully, it will go well. I wlll be in my happy place so not much should bother me!!!

 

[seashoreCM]

What if you decide to stay home?

I know your annual pass is screaming from the top dresser drawer, "Use me! Use me!"

Or go along, just follow along, you can still enjoy yourself if you don't have to lift a finger. You will feel more relaxed if you can whisper to yourself over and over(does not requires a transcendental meditation session or garb) "I could have stayed home, I could have stayed home ..."

This is hubby's show.

Turn yourself back into that commando power tripper on your 2012 trip.

 

[tlbwriter]

So, your husband knows his mother hates surprises, and hates crowds, so he wants to surprise her with a trip to a crowded place? And plans to do it in a way that doesn't allow her to decline? And he's sure enough she will dislike it that he's thinking of ways to "cushion the blow?" Does he not like his mother? Because this whole scheme sounds remarkably thoughtless to me. And trying to get the poor woman to wear a t-shirt, when you know she doesn't like them, just so you can all match? Just adding insult to injury, IMHO.

 

[LilGMom]

My initial reaction when I saw this was to say "Run away... run far away.. don't look back and don't do it!!!!" But.... we've survived trips with the ILs. The only way we have survived them was with separate accommodations and splitting up in the parks. If MIL enjoys shopping and wants to go off and do that, encourage it. Encourage MIL & FIL to explore the resorts together or the countries around the WS. Set up some meals together, give them a list of the times and places, set up some time to be together but set up some time to do things without each other. Oh, and skip the matchy-matchy shirts if one person is against them. Let your kids match but I wouldn't force someone to wear one nor would I not include them by having them be the only one not matching.

Good luck with! No matter how good your relationship with the ILs, or any extended family for that matter, too much together time while on vacation can be brutal.