Genuinely curious about wanting a private table

[darnheather]

I was really worried about getting a bad match. My little three person family is kind of weird. I won't go into all the reasons why but we just aren't typical Americans. Now that we've been through the experience I'm glad I didn't request a private table as I think DCL does a first rate job at making matches.

 

[FairestOfThemAll37]

I generally cruise with one person so always requesting a table for two. If the tables are so close together it's like one, we do upcharge restaurants and skip the MDR.

Why? Well, I don't love making small talk and I'm a very private person so I don't particularly like all the "what do you do?, are you married?, do you have kids? Etc." questions that come up. I find them too personal for somebody I've just met under "forced" circumstances.

Another big reason is the pacing of dinners. I don't typically like drawn out affairs except under certain circumstances. We maybe do an appetizer and the main dinner so waiting for a whole table to do multiple courses then waiting for dessert is agonizing and people tend to think you're quite rude if you excuse yourself after you've finished your one plate of food lol.

 

[NewsMom]

We just did our first cruise and we're matched up with an awesome group of table mates! With that said when we take our kids we are requesting a private table. My daughter has autism and it really would not be fair to anyone who is sitting with us to have to deal with her issues. So there may be non allergy medicAl reasons for a private table request.

On our first, we were matched with another single mom and her daughter. The mom ended up being from my tiny rural area. We knew all the same people even though she'd moved away years earlier and spent dinner gossiping the whole cruise.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

My dh travels a lot for work so we spend many days, sometimes weeks without seeing each other, so having a table for just us is a special treat. Besides, when we go to a restaurant on land we don't sit with strangers at a shared table, so I don't see any reason to do so on the ship.

This made me laugh a little - I would say probably 40% of restaurants I go to have communal tables - so it seems we are always eating with strangers!
I have offered strangers seats at my table at crowded counter service places at Disney.

 

[Amandine]

To *me, vacation means not putting on a show of sociability: the freedom to be silent, to not have to plaster on a fake smile to make table-mates comfortable, to not have to be "on," to discuss things that are near and dear to my heart with my loved ones and not worry whether I am excluding people at my table or over-revealing my mind. I just want to be able to relax and be myself.

....

Edited to add: This is coming from a place of great exhaustion, where this introvert has had to spend WAY too much time playing the chipper extrovert. I *so* need this vacation!!

This is precisely how I feel about it. I can do it, but it's exhausting, and not what I'm likely to want by the end of the day, especially.

There will certainly be plenty of other opportunities to get to know other people. I do sort of understand the bafflement by the more extroverted posters, because I have extroverted family that I baffle on a regular basis But for me, Aanna's post hits the nail on the head.

 

[KashasMom]

Our cruise is OUR family time.

1) I don't like small talk in my everyday life...even less so on my vacation.
2) I don't need/want any more friends.
3) We've had some really terrible tablemates. The last family was so out of control (the kids, mom was too laid back to care that her toddler was climbing on the table or her middle kid was throwing up next to me) that I didn't even want to go to the dining room.

 

[Charlies_Mommy]

Don't mean to hijack this....but is it acceptable to tip when you make this request? If I have to go to the dining rom and request this the day of sailing, is it ok to ask and then tip? And if so, how much?

 

[OKW Lover]

Don't mean to hijack this....but is it acceptable to tip when you make this request? If I have to go to the dining rom and request this the day of sailing, is it ok to ask and then tip? And if so, how much?

No, you don't tip for that service.

 

[quickcat]

Don't mean to hijack this....but is it acceptable to tip when you make this request? If I have to go to the dining rom and request this the day of sailing, is it ok to ask and then tip? And if so, how much?

I wouldn't tip for a request.

 

[bcwife76]

On our first cruise my family of 4 shared a table with another family of 4. They were a great match, the adults got on great, the kids were the same ages, it was fun. Having said that, my husband is very much an introvert and he found it difficult being 'on' every night. He didn't want to appear rude so of course he kept up the conversation but it was usually myself who did most of the talking (because that's just me lol). Also, we were always at the table first and while our dining companions were not very late (maybe 5-10 minutes after we arrived) it was still a little awkward having to wait for everyone to be seated before orders could be taken, etc.

On our second cruise this past January I had called to request a private table, was given the whole 'it's not a guarantee shpiel' and our request was granted. I did it again for our upcoming Alaskan cruise next month so we shall see. I'm certainly not against meeting new people but I know it would make my husband more comfortable, shall we say, if it was just our family.

 

[Dug720]

Don't mean to hijack this....but is it acceptable to tip when you make this request? If I have to go to the dining rom and request this the day of sailing, is it ok to ask and then tip? And if so, how much?

No need to bribe. If they can accommodate, they will. There IS a chance that it would result in changing your dining rotation and/or require a move to the other dining period. There are only so many tables in the MDRs and so much space. They can't manufacture a table where there isn't one.

 

[Dug720]

I wouldn't tip for a request.

That's not a tip. It's a bribe. LOL.

 

[tlprice]

I am not a social person and would prefer not to share a table, but my daughter LOVES sharing a table. So far on our two cruises, Disney has done a great job of matching her up with kids her age and she has made great friends with them. Since it is just the two of us, I would feel bad making her eat with just me and not being able to make friends with other kids her age. All of our table mates have been single mothers travelling with one child about the age of my daughter, so it has been great for her and not too bad for me. I still would prefer not to have table mates, but if it makes her happy, I can suck it up. I did ask her if on our upcoming cruises she'd like to just sit with me or share a table and she was very adamant about wanting to share a table.

 

[ludari]

I had a bad experience with my table mates on my very first cruise and since then I have always requested my own table.

 

[Dug720]

I had a bad experience with my table mates on my very first cruise and since then I have always requested my own table.

It seems we solo cruisers have the worst luck. You'd think they'd learn that just traveling solo does not mean anything in common and automatically give solos their own table unless requested otherwise.

 

[LSUfan4444]

I spend all day on the cruise ship being social and at dinner time I prefer a little more "privacy". We talk about our favorite things we did, what we're looking forward to, talk about the next day's navigator, ets. We are an extremely social family and have the only time we have requested a private table is when it has been just my wife and I but the two times we have been paired with another family neither was ideal.

 

[jvh4]

I was also surprised at 1st how common the request is, but I get it. I think how we socialize these days is very different and preferences are evolving. For those of us more socially inclined, we may find the latest socialization and networking trends to be less personal, but for many it's more comfortable/enjoyable.

I think for many of us vacations are infrequent, or require sacrifices, and as such people deserve to eliminate sources of stress and anxiety. Of course we all deal with families who because of this feel entitled and act selfishly to the detriment of their neighbors, but simple things like having a quiet family dinner are exactly what vacation is all about for me.

That being said, I'm going on my 1st Disney Cruise and am looking forward to see who we are matched with. My only other cruise as an adult was my honeymoon, and my new bride I and were placed at a table with 6 other people (1 married coupled, I dating couple, 2 bachelors travelling together. We were all about the same age)

Here are my 3 most memorable moments from our entire honeymoon.

1. Riding on the back of a scooter my wife was driving on Captiva, wondering why people were honking and cursing at us. Then I realized she was reading the km/hr, not mph; therefore, going way too slow for miles of no passing zone.
2. Enjoying morning coffee with my wife sitting on the dock watching a baby dolphin come by each day to play with us.
3. Us and our 6 table mates participating in karaoke night packed with people who take singing very seriously, to perform Bye Bye Bye complete with dance moves to the absolute horror or everyone watching. We saw the video sober the next morning - we may have been wrong about our version being better than the original . . .

Long story short, I couldn't be more happy that we decided to chance it sharing a table. It has given my wife and I one of those lifetime memories that are so fleeting and priceless.

 

[tink1970]

Another pair of introverts who are just plain exhausted by people and making small talk. I definitely take the guarantee of dining without table mates into the price of concierge...and it is often often worth it. We have been lucky to sail non concierge and have our own table but the stress of worrying about that often isn't worth it. Most of the times we've been paired up it hasn't been bad but why dread an activity on vacation?

 

[Cirlonde]

Super introvert here. I can make small talk if I have to, but it's very draining for me. And then at the end of the social interaction, I will spend days or weeks mulling over the conversation I had and criticizing myself for things I said or didn't say or should have said differently. It's EXHAUSTING! And I'm just paying too much money for a vacation to want to work that hard.

I also hate awkward social situations, so I go out of my way to try to make things not-awkward. However, since this doesn't come naturally to me, it takes a lot of effort. So I know that if I were sharing a table with strangers, I would not feel comfortable just relaxing and being myself. I would constantly be "performing" to make sure the whole evening runs as smoothly as possible.

Now, if someone else is going to carry the entire conversation and do all the "smoothing" of any awkward silences, I usually have a good time. But it's no guarantee that you're going to get placed with a "good" extrovert.

 

[bobbiwoz]

Senior citizen cruisers. DH would prefer a table for 2, I would prefer company! We often "allow" ourselves to be joined at larger tables for lunch or breakfast if we are at a 2 top for dinner. If we do share a table for dinner, we stick with 2 tops for other dining room meals. We have learned to compromise!