Geeks on a boat! Disney Wonder Sept 3-7, adventures in alcohol....

[saratogagirl]

I need more too - its brilliant .....

 

[curlybop]

Still a wonderful report. I am drooling a bit though, reading about & looking at the Palo stuff.

 

[purplern]

Great report!!!

Your eco tour sounds like mine! My daughter and I were on one. We brought up the rear coming into the stopa good 10 mins later than everyone else!

 

[lillygator]

we could eat at Palo every day as well....sorry your server wasn't up to par....!

 

[mandymouse]

This has got to be one of the funniest trip reports that I've ever read I wish you were coming on our January Cruise, it's refreshing to meet another diser who clearly enjoys her drink

Just a quick question, for the Palo brunch and high tea, were they only offered on the day at sea ? or are they on other days as well ? Did they both cost $10 a head ? and what is the suggested tip to leave ?

Thanks, and I can't wait to read some more

Mandy

 

[gdulaney]

we rejoined her on the walk of shame to the ROOM OF NAUGHTY MUD LOVE (echo, echo, echo).

Okay -- I was still laughing from the "braid your hair pretty lady" when I got to the walk of shame to the Room of Naughty Mud Love and then the cola came out the nose. I will never be able to think of it as anything other than the room of naughty mud love ...

Ginny

 

[cheriemek]

Could you take me with you on your next cruise? You sound like much more fun than my husband.

 

[zweihund]

Just a quick question, for the Palo brunch and high tea, were they only offered on the day at sea ? or are they on other days as well ? Did they both cost $10 a head ? and what is the suggested tip to leave ?
Mandy

They were both on the day at sea, though apparently high tea is usually only on the 7+ day cruises. Our 4-day was RIGHT before the 10 and 11 nights to the Southern Carribean, so they added it in for practice. Brunch was $10 and tea was $5. As far as I know, the service charge IS the tip, but we are overtippers so we tend to leave more if they've been good or if we get alcohol.

Okay -- I was still laughing from the "braid your hair pretty lady" when I got to the walk of shame to the Room of Naughty Mud Love and then the cola came out the nose.

My work here is done.

Vicky, I love that shirt!

Could you take me with you on your next cruise? You sound like much more fun than my husband.

 

[pit303]

Great trip report best I have ever read. DH, DD and I sail on the Magic Oct 7th. Glad to hear there will be plenty "adult beverage"!! Please hurry with "Coming next: omigod, we forgot to pack!"

 

[michelle9343]

This has been such a great read!!!! I can't wait for the rest.

 

[zweihund]

This installment will be a little bit shorter than usual and sans pictures, as I had an actual writing assignment for class this evening. But I promise, you will get your full packing fiasco report tomorrow!

In the meantime, enjoy our second visit to the spa.

Chapter 9 – what masochist invented the steam room anyway?

Feeling bloated and still frightened by the prospect of the blue and purple dessert from H-E-double hockey sticks, Lionel and I decided that this would be a great time to FINALLY try out the Rainforest Room in the spa.
In retrospect, I feel the spa really needs to offer one more specialty service on the sea day, and that would be a giant fluffy bed with giant fluffy pillows and smooth jazz and a skylight for sleeping off the Palo brunch. Thirty-minute sessions starting from 10 am until 5, $50 a pop? They could make a KILLING. The Rainforest was a pretty decent substitution, however.

Again, we checked in and got the silly little plastic shoes and the poorly-fitting robes (this time my sash is missing) but this time would be a little different - we have to disrobe in front of strangers. Not just strangers – HOT SWEATY strangers. Eeeyyyeeewwwww!

I suddenly felt very self-conscious in my bikini, though I had no qualms about wearing it out at the pool on the open deck where everyone and their mother were walking by. There is just something about a warm enclosed public room with light music playing that makes me want to keep my clothes on, which I am sure makes me a total freak. Anyhow, I grabbed the nearest towel I could find and wrapped myself in it UNDER MY ROBE (yes, I really did) before I would hang the sashless wonder up on the peg.

Once I felt sufficiently covered, I plonked down on the nearest lounger and immediately was in love. All nakedness worries were forgotten as I sunk further and further in to the hard tile chaise. How could something made of tile and grout be so comfortable? The sound of Homer Simpson eating a donut resonated in my ears and I think I might have even drooled a little bit.

We relaxed there for a little while, and then decided to get a bit more adventurous (while still tightly wrapped in a towel). There was a little room to the left that said “mild steam” – that sounded like my kind of place. We went in. And we immediately came right back out.
MILD, MY @$$! Who were they kidding? Even Lionel couldn’t stand it in there, and as I discovered in the naughty mud chamber he is a steam room junkie!

Ok, no big deal. There were plenty of things to do in there. How about the “aromatherapy steam?” That sounded nice! How hot could flowery-scented steam possibly be, right? We opened the door and steam poured out. The only thing visible was a disembodied foot wearing a familiar blue plastic slide. There was a faraway voice: “Come on in…..in…..in……in” it echoed, after which Lionel and I looked at each other, then back at the foot, and then replied in unison “no thanks.”

Well crap. Was there nothing in here we could do? The last room was the sauna, so we thought we could give it a go. At least we could see what was attached to the feet in there. Immediately upon entering we were in our niche. Warm tile bench, cozy temperature, and the ability to BREATHE, the power of which is never to be underestimated in my opinion. Now THIS was what we had been looking for. We sunk into the benches, closed our eyes, and commenced drooling. Now, being a Florida girl I have never been a big fan of steam or saunas. But this? This was pretty darn spectacular. I was in heaven.

Once all of the Homer Simpson saliva had been sufficiently dried from our bodies, I remembered that there were scented showers and popped up to get refreshed. I discovered something in that shower. The temperature gauge on the nozzle is designed to give you the illusion that you are somehow in control of the degree of the water that comes out of there. The “rain” setting? It smelled fantastic, but it was like getting hit with tiny little daggers of ice that pierced through all of the warmth and goodness that I had spent the last 30 minutes soaking in. Not fair! Not fair! Get it off! Gah!

I looked to Lionel for some help, but he seemed to be lost in thought staring at the empty aromatherapy steam room. No, no, no….steam room BAD, shower GOOD! And then he did the most horrible thing he has done to me in our two years of marriage - he grabbed my hand and dragged me in. My nails dug in to the floor, pulling up tiles as I screeched toward the claustrophobic chamber….he threw me on the bench opposite him, shut the door, and hit the steam button. Panic set in. I expected little shackles to lock on to my wrists and ankles. “Errr….can I get out now?” “Nope.” “Please?” there was terror in my voice. “No, you’re staying in here with me. Relax.”

I’m in the tiniest room on the entire ship and it is filling with steam and I can barely breathe and you want me to RELAX? Are you kidding me? I started looking around wildly and trying to find a little pocket of cool air to plunge my face into. You may consider me a slightly high-anxiety person from my portrayal of myself in this report, but truth be told I am actually pretty easy-going. Until, that is, you stick me in a tiny room filled with steam and then tell me I can’t leave. EVIL!

I started for the door, and Lionel blocked me. “No, just keep trying. I’m here. You’ll be just fine.” I consider for a moment what we have done up until this point. We snorkeled with Stingrays. We rode on a jet ski out into giant mutant shark-infested waters. We ate enough to make us explode. We survived all of that together. And I couldn’t handle a little bit of steam? I settled back on the bench, dipped my towel in the cool fountain and held it on my face. Lionel held my hand. I tried to breathe.
After what felt like an eternity, the steam kicked off and the room started to clear. I did it! I did it! I got up and did the happy dance, towel akimbo, ready to hit the showers and call it a day. And then I heard the words that still ring in my ears like the toll of the bells on execution day:
“One more time.”
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

We left the spa an hour later feeling relaxed and rejuvenated, and all for the bargain price of $30. It was no naughty mud treatment, but it was definitely a close second.

Coming next - wait for it, wait for it, PACKING DISASTER!

 

[RoyalVizier]

Uh... this last installment was almost scary! I nearly suffered myocardial infarction as I read.

 

[eeyoregon]

Could you take me with you on your next cruise? You sound like much more fun than my husband.

Ooooh, pick me too!!! I don't have a husband to compare to but these sound like my kind of folks and that would take care of the double occupancy issue

 

[JLSE50]

We purchased a free-form piece from one of the carvers, haggling only a little bit before settling. Hey, I’m all for getting a bargain on a knock-off Kate Spade bag, but a wood carving requires a tremendous skill that we felt should be rewarded. We got $7 off and that was enough to make us feel less like we had been had. I’m sure we were the laughing stock of the carving station after we were out of earshot.

This is from Chapter 3, which by the way is very good, as is all the rest of her writing!!
Since a lot of third world countries require school students to supply their own paper, books, pencils, uniforms, etc. we always buy what we want at the price they quote without haggling as we consider we are enabling them to have a nicer dinner tonight or a kid to go to school tomorrow. If they laugh when we leave, we don't care.
Jan

 

[JLSE50]

Chapter Seven: .....And while the floaties nearly did us in on the way there, I have to say they were totally worth the backbreaking walk from the other side of the island. Yes, yes I know…..you can rent them there. But what we did builds CHARACTER. You can’t buy that.....

TOO FUNNY!!

(I'm the dot in the middle)

And I am probably one of the dots way out in the deeper water--my motto is S.E.O. Snorkel Every Opportunity.

After an unspecified amount of time had passed, Lionel glanced over at me and asked if I was ready to head back to the boat. “Not on your life, mister” I replied and closed my eyes again. And then, there was a giant clap of thunder from out of nowhere. I looked back at my husband. “Yeah, now is good.”

Back to the room to change for Pirate Night! I don my gear and help Lionel apply his clip-on earring and then I demand rum. I must say I was pleasantly surprised by the number of folks in costume. It would have made for some great photos if they weren’t all blurred by the rum.

Jan

 

[sejejoemmiev]

I couldn't wait to come home tonight from work to finish reading your Trip report. You have had me laughing ou loud! This is officially the best trip report I have read!!!!!!!!! You have a way with words!!

 

[Credit Man]

Way too funny!!!

 

[Mr. Moose51]

Fantastic report, loved reading about your trip.

 

[Simba22]

just subscribing so I can read the rest! your TR is awesome and has helped me through a day and a half of work! It's wonderful and I only hope that my December TR is half as entertaining as yours!

 

[Babs417]

Thankyou boy did I enjoy that. So what happened on the way home and the last few days? Just keep writing I dont leave for my next trip until Oct 27. Its realy not that long to keep writing.