Fundraising gone wild...

[Vijoge]

I hate fundraisers. DGD is on the swim team. Every year they have a team swim-a-thon where the girls are to obtain pledges from friends and family, who agree to pay x$ per lap. The girls are told in advance that they need to raise a certain amt (I think last year it was $80). Two years ago we were told the money was going to purchase new swim fins, buoys, etc. We're still waiting for the equipment to arrive, I guess. I've decided to not play this game any more. If she needs fins, I will buy her a pair.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

I hate fundraisers. I hate doing them. I hate contributing to them. I hate that a roll of wrapping paper that I can get for $2 costs $15. I hate EVERYTHING about them. From the coupon books to the fruit to the pork butts, to the wrapping paper. I hate them all. Absolutely loathe them. But I also recognize that they have become a necessity and not to take it out on those doing them. When the county school system doesn't fund band because well people don't want to pay proper taxes and budgets get axed well the band has to have a booster club and fund raise or there is no band. And it's not just fund raising. Heck. I'm as busy with the band as the kids. chaperones, band meals, snack bar, uniforms, instrument repair. Driving the truck and/or trailers are all things parents have to do in addition to all that fund raising. The community swim team has to have a booster club and fund raise or there is no swim team. I wish we could go back to the days when these things were funded and people recognized their value.

As for people wanting to fund missions this or that, I really don't mind gofundme. I certainly would mind the envelope thing. That's over the top. What puts a burr in my bonnet though is the amount of money the bigot bucks circuit rakes in big bucks while some kid trying to pay his band fees gets trashed and told to get a job. The pizza joint got 900k of big bigot bucks. Gofundme has since not allowed such things. But they just went to other sites.


Edit. How could I forget the Girl Scout Cookies and the group kicked out because they didn't sell them? Another fundraiser I can't stand. And lately I can't stand all these institutional fundraisers where 7 cents on the dollar actually goes to philanthropy.

 

[sk!mom]

I hate fundraisers. DGD is on the swim team. Every year they have a team swim-a-thon where the girls are to obtain pledges from friends and family, who agree to pay x$ per lap. The girls are told in advance that they need to raise a certain amt (I think last year it was $80). Two years ago we were told the money was going to purchase new swim fins, buoys, etc. We're still waiting for the equipment to arrive, I guess. I've decided to not play this game any more. If she needs fins, I will buy her a pair.

My children participated in many activities over the years that had mandatory fundraising. "Everyone must sell 1 box of candy or 10 coupon books."

If it was something that we thought anyone might want (Girl Scout Cookies, coupon books), we would throw out one email to close friends and family "Snowflake is selling ____, shoot me a reply if you would like any." Then we sold what we could and made a donation to cover their remaining share of the group fundraising goal, if necessary, because I do understand the necessity of fundraising for some activities. One request in the lowest pressure easiest to ignore way possible.

If it was something that we didn't want then we assumed that no one else would either (overpriced cookie dough, wrapping paper, etc...), we just preferred to opt out. DH or I would send back the brochure or box of candy with a note and a check for our child's share.

If it was PTO or something where their wasn't a per person required goal, we would just decide what we wanted to donate and send a check in that amount.

Only one group ever balked. DD was involved in a school club that required every student to sell one box of candy to qualify to go on their year end trip. DH sent the candy back along with a note and a check for $50. We got the lame response that "no, we believe that each student should "work" selling the candy" DH said, "Seriously, I'm offering you the entire cost of the box as pure profit but you would prefer that she sells it and you make half?"

We were ticked at this point but didn't want DD to have issues as all of her 5th grade friends were in the group so we took the box of candy. I happen to teach at the same school so I sold them in my room after school. When sales slowed down, I put them on clearance and sold them for half price. The sponsor LOVED my clearance sale.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I hate fundraisers. DGD is on the swim team. Every year they have a team swim-a-thon where the girls are to obtain pledges from friends and family, who agree to pay x$ per lap. The girls are told in advance that they need to raise a certain amt (I think last year it was $80). Two years ago we were told the money was going to purchase new swim fins, buoys, etc. We're still waiting for the equipment to arrive, I guess. I've decided to not play this game any more. If she needs fins, I will buy her a pair.

Ha. Just say no.

Hopefully mom can opt out.

 

[Unas]

Nah! The community swim team does not need to fund raise with the kids selling stuff one needs or wants to exist. They can, and do, charge training fees. You want kiddo to swim, you join and pay the fee. Or, in some areas, there are Ys and Kroc centers that either have endowments or tap pilanthropists for big donations.

 

[tcufrog]

This is timely for me because last week I got a Go Fund Me email from my babysitter's high school daughter. She was raising money for new cheerleading equipment. If the email had been announcing that her cheer squad was holding a car wash or offering some other service for money I would have given generously. I was offended by the Go Fund Me though. It's not like she's dying of cancer. She wants to wave pom poms during football games.

I only went on one mission trip when I was in school. It was to San Antonio to work for Habitat for Humanity. We spent a week in the summer heat doing appropriate work such as painting, hauling supplies, and planting shrubs. There was no Go Fund Me. We ran a pumpkin sale on a busy street corner, worked concessions at local sporting events, hosted a spaghetti dinner (we cooked, served and cleaned up with minimal adult supervision), and held a service auction (I offered babysitting services.).

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I have my SIL begging for money. It is 50 bucks per kid. Seriously, pay it yourself.

So today she posts a pic and says they are 10 bucks away from their goal. REALLY?

I just DO NOT understand the mentality.

OK...I went on the site they are using and get this.....and I QUOTE....

"IF YOU DO NOT GIVE BACK, NO ONE WILL LIKE YOU"....unquote.

WTH???!!! Here is their generic link, it is a site called "crowdwise".

https://www.crowdrise.com/

 

[ronandannette]

Well, I think part of the "benefit" is having the kids actually talk to the people their helping.

While I'm sure there are some people who go on vacations disguised as a mission trip, I think it's very insulting to insinuate they're all like that.

Both your points are very true. There are all sorts of reasons people take short-term mission trips, but many of those who aren't involved in faith-based organizations (yes, I mean religion and church) don't understand or agree with them. The concepts of following a call, learning to serve and being trained for future service, identifying with the the poor and/or suffering, connecting with other human beings rather than just the images of hungry kids on tv - lots of reasons. From a purely pragmatic standpoint, yes, it's much more practical to just donate whatever cash would be spent on the trip to be used most efficiently by the locals. But man does not live by bread alone...

Someone should write that on a piece of paper and put it in one of the envelopes.

Or, you know, people could just politely decline to participate and get on with their day...

 

[sk!mom]

Both your points are very true. There are all sorts of reasons people take short-term mission trips, but many of those who aren't involved in faith-based organizations (yes, I mean religion and church) don't understand or agree with them. The concepts of following a call, learning to serve and being trained for future service, identifying with the the poor and/or suffering, connecting with other human beings rather than just the images of hungry kids on tv - lots of reasons. From a purely pragmatic standpoint, yes, it's much more practical to just donate whatever cash would be spent on the trip to be used most efficiently by the locals. But man does not live by bread alone...

I am involved in faith-based organizations and the benefits of short term mission trips you listed are the reasons that both of my children did them. The benefits were to my kids though not to those they served. Since it was for their benefit, we paid.

 

[sam_gordon]

I am involved in faith-based organizations and the benefits of short term mission trips you listed are the reasons that both of my children did them. The benefits were to my kids though not to those they served. Since it was for their benefit, we paid.

So you're talking to your friend. You say "DD is going on a trip with her church group to help run a VBS (whatever)". Your friend says "You know, that's a good thing to do, here's $50 to help the cause." I guess everyone should turn down that money.

 

[ronandannette]

So you're talking to your friend. You say "DD is going on a trip with her church group to help run a VBS (whatever)". Your friend says "You know, that's a good thing to do, here's $50 to help the cause." I guess everyone should turn down that money.

Another good point because some of us are actually "called" to be part of missions by giving generous financial support instead of going ourselves.

 

[pocomom]

I had a friend who contacted me about a trip her son was taking. It sounded amazing, but I told her I couldn't afford to send my DD with only three months notice. She replied that she had no money for it either but her son was going to work and fundraise and raise the money. Then I proceeded to get email after email from his go fund me page, messages that I should come out and support him at his coin drop outside the supermarket. Email messages asking for at least $5 , because if everyone sent him that he would have enough to go...Never saw much work but there was a lot of begging- from me, the one who couldn't afford to send her dd...

 

[pocomom]

I had a friend who contacted me about a trip her son was taking. It sounded amazing, but I told her I couldn't afford to send my DD with only three months notice. She replied that she had no money for it either but her son was going to work and fundraise and raise the money. Then I proceeded to get email after email from his go fund me page, messages that I should could out and support him at his coin drop outside the supermarket. EmIl messages asking for at least $5 , becuase if everyone aent him that he would have enough to go...Never saw much work but there was a lot of begging- from me, the one who couldn't afford to send her dd...

Oh and he did end up going . So the unfortunate message is begging works to fund your vacation.

 

[anneboleyn]

Or, you know, people could just politely decline to participate and get on with their day...

Unfortunately, I do not think the people pimping out these envelopes understand politeness lol. I have never heard of some of these fundraising strategies. The churches around here are the ones who always took care of the monetary aspect of the mission trips.

 

[sk!mom]

So you're talking to your friend. You say "DD is going on a trip with her church group to help run a VBS (whatever)". Your friend says "You know, that's a good thing to do, here's $50 to help the cause." I guess everyone should turn down that money.

If that had EVER happened, I'd have a better answer but since this is clearly hypothetical and very unlikely, I suppose I would accept a completely unsolicited gift however since you said, "to help the cause" I would assume that they wanted DD to gift it to the church she was traveling to assist or at the very least use it for the art supplies, game supplies, snacks they were purchasing for the VBS. I would't think that they intended it to be used for her travel expenses. But again, it never happened. If this is something that happens regularly for others, maybe I've never seen it because we do not fundraise for these trips and neither does our church. Everyone pays their own way.

Another good point because some of us are actually "called" to be part of missions by giving generous financial support instead of going ourselves.

We definitely have different religious views. In my view, if you are "called" then surely God will provide. And in my view that provision should be through your own work not asking for handouts.

I had a friend who contacted me about a trip her son was taking. It sounded amazing, but I told her I couldn't afford to send my DD with only three months notice. She replied that she had no money for it either but her son was going to work and fundraise and raise the money. Then I proceeded to get email after email from his go fund me page, messages that I should could out and support him at his coin drop outside the supermarket. EmIl messages asking for at least $5 , becuase if everyone aent him that he would have enough to go...Never saw much work but there was a lot of begging- from me, the one who couldn't afford to send her dd...

This has played out so often in my real life as well.

 

[okeydokey]

So you're talking to your friend. You say "DD is going on a trip with her church group to help run a VBS (whatever)". Your friend says "You know, that's a good thing to do, here's $50 to help the cause." I guess everyone should turn down that money.

There is a huge difference between someone hearing you are going on a trip and offering money than outright asking people for money to fund your kids activities.

 

[sam_gordon]

If that had EVER happened, I'd have a better answer but since this is clearly hypothetical and very unlikely, I suppose I would accept a completely unsolicited gift however since you said, "to help the cause" I would assume that they wanted DD to gift it to the church she was traveling to assist or at the very least use it for the art supplies, game supplies, snacks they were purchasing for the VBS. I would't think that they intended it to be used for her travel expenses. But again, it never happened. If this is something that happens regularly for others, maybe I've never seen it because we do not fundraise for these trips and neither does our church. Everyone pays their own way.

So they can give $50 for art supplies, but not $50 for airfare (hotel, whatever)? When we pay (or fundraise) for DD's trips, the money isn't designated for a certain line item. It's designated to the total.

There is a huge difference between someone hearing you are going on a trip and offering money than outright asking people for money to fund your kids activities.

Maybe DD's church is just "lower key" than what others have experienced. I mentioned they do the envelope fundraiser. There's an announcement during church services on how the fundraiser works and then tables are set up before/after service. People are free to stop by, but we've never been pressured to do so.

If folks are willing to give, I'm sorry, I don't see the problem. I agree people shouldn't feel obligated or pressured, but I'm not going to turn down money given to the church group.

 

[sk!mom]

So they can give $50 for art supplies, but not $50 for airfare (hotel, whatever)? When we pay (or fundraise) for DD's trips, the money isn't designated for a certain line item. It's designated to the total.


Maybe DD's church is just "lower key" than what others have experienced. I mentioned they do the envelope fundraiser. There's an announcement during church services on how the fundraiser works and then tables are set up before/after service. People are free to stop by, but we've never been pressured to do so.

If folks are willing to give, I'm sorry, I don't see the problem. I agree people shouldn't feel obligated or pressured, but I'm not going to turn down money given to the church group.

To me the difference is...$50 for the VBS would be to provide for less privileged kids to have the VBS experience that more affluent kids expect and take for granted while my DD learned to give back and appreciate blessings more. Using the money for air fare or hotel would be taking a hand out to pay for my child's experience/vacation.

If you are truly okay with this, I'm planning another trip to Hawaii and we'll spend a day feeding the homeless. Wanna donate?

 

[dhardawa]

One thing that irritates me is when I see little league baseball or youth football teams or any sport for that matter, standing on the street corner with buckets asking for money to send junior to some tournament. Hey here's an idea, How about go do a carwash or something else to actually earn the money.

I saw this just the other day and thought the same thing. It was a dance group with little girls in the 6-10 year old range. I just kept thinking that they weren't teaching the girls to earn money, they were teaching them to panhandle (and dodge traffic).

 

[barkley]

One thing that irritates me is when I see little league baseball or youth football teams or any sport for that matter, standing on the street corner with buckets asking for money to send junior to some tournament. Hey here's an idea, How about go do a carwash or something else to actually earn the money.

I saw this just the other day and thought the same thing. It was a dance group with little girls in the 6-10 year old range. I just kept thinking that they weren't teaching the girls to earn money, they were teaching them to panhandle (and dodge traffic).

we had a major political/community issue near us with this a few years ago-the city counsel of a nearby city was trying to deal with 2 issues-'aggressive panhandling' and public safety. what it came down to was there were certain areas (largely intersections) where panhandlers would congregate to collect money-money they would approach people in cars (so into the streets) to collect-it caused traffic issues and in some cases car and pedestrian accidents (esp. in one particular place where the area was near a freeway exit).

the city counsel wanted to address the issue by banning any collections of monies by anyone who had to reach into the street for drivers to hand monies out through their windows. who complained? not the advocates for the homeless/destitute-they supported the safety aspect. not the charities that did once or twice per year 'annual' bucket/boot drives (well organized/announced/safely maintained). the biggest opponents were the smaller teams and leagues and groups that just randomly set up at intersections (largely with kids running into the street collecting the monies from strangers in cars) who complained the proposed ban would eliminate their means of fundraising.

seriously????? imho-this is NOT fundraising-it is the same panhandling that the individuals side by side with these kids are doing. it's one thing if the firemen have their one time per year charity boot drive-announced with a couple of safe/low traffic designated locations where people can flag down a firefighter to approach for a collection-it's entirely different when you've got kids with paper signage reading 'need spare change for_____________' side by side with panhandlers holding similar signs. I wont donate to these efforts while even if I don't need a car wash i'll approach a youth group in a grocery store or other lot to give them a donation because there's some effort being put forth AND their collection isn't causing a traffic hazard.

...$50 for the VBS would be to provide for less privileged kids to have the VBS experience that more affluent kids expect and take for granted

sorry but I'm confused by this-do vbs experiences really vary based on how privileged a kid is?

I ask this b/c as a young adult I worked vbs at different times in both very affluent and horrendously non affluent areas-and the affluence of the area (beyond how physically nice the church was) really made no difference in the content or structure of what vbs provided (identical by age/grade curriculum, tied in art projects, activities). I observed the same working for social services in a county that had insanely wealthy areas as well as those among the most poverty ridden in the united states.

if anything-the less affluent areas had many more/longer term offerings by virtue of a multitude of faith based organizations attempting to provide some form of supervised, meal providing free of charge summer activities for kids. while the affluent areas offered a handful of 3, maybe 4 hour per day/5 day at most 2 or 3 week programs the less affluent areas offered programs that at minimum went from early morning until after the lunch hour (so average of 5 hours per day) and more often than not went 5 days per week for weeks on end. the norm for kids attending vbs in the affluent areas might be a snack or treat during their sessions (more often than not that they brought or a once a week item vbs provided) whereas the schedule for the kids at the impoverished offerings was structured to include snack and lunch provided by vbs daily.


maybe I'm confusing what my own kids did as summer "enrichment" programs (read-daycare) and summer camps (through religious based private schools/organizations) with what you are referring to as 'vbs'. THOSE absolutely varied greatly on what the experience was (based on the cost of the program) so I can see how an affluent child's expectations could be vastly different.