Fluff: weird things your spouses do (nothing serious, this is for fun)

[lsherman]

my husband gets completly stripped down to go to the bathroom.

nad he refuses to go to the bathroom in public, he will hold it an entire day till he gets back home or hotel where we may be staying

 

[mirmartinez]

I think I should add this to my gripe.
My oldest has started shoving his socks in the couch as well. (this habit will be broken)
Like father like son
It is all so bizarre and quite yucky.

 

[Kitty 34]

Instead of just simply eating the rest of something (ice cream, peanut butter, whatever) he leaves enough left in the container for possibly a gnat to chomp on!

 

[OhMari]

Kitty 34
Instead of just simply eating the rest of something (ice cream, peanut butter, whatever) he leaves enough left in the container for possibly a gnat to chomp on!

Mine too.


My dh won't finish something he is eating.
He always eats ice cream from the box and chips from the bag, salsa from the glass jar, etc.

So, if there is just a spoonful of ice cream left, he won't eat it. Or if there are crumbs on the bottom of the bag, he puts the bag back for someone else to finish. I have to throw out old bags of chips, dip, ice cream. I cannot for the life of me, figure out why he does this. Unless he is just to lazy to throw anything away.

 

[Pakey]

I've been married for a few decades so the list is long. These are the highlights of my life though:

1) Thinks serving hotdogs for dinner to guests is a suitable meal.
2) Taps his fingers on the tabletop when talking.
3) Moves his lips while reading to himself.
4) Practices his golf swing in the mirror while waiting for the shower water to heat in the morning. Naked. Not a pretty sight when first waking.
5) Goes to the video store and rents a stack of movies nobody has ever heard of.

 

[MELSMICE]

I depends on my mood as to how annoyed I get about these things......

1. Can't close a dresser drawer to save his life.

2. Leaves his keys, phone & wallet on the kitchen counter even though he has to walk by the desk in the kitchen, which is where I am constantly moving them to.

3. He asks a question, I answer it & he goes "huh". Every single, gosh darn time!!!!!

4. He pulls on the left chest of his shirt constantly. I'm not sure if the thing is too tight or if he's trying to tell me to take a look at his great chest, but he looks like a goofball when he does it & he does it all the time!!!

I will keep him though because the good definitely outweighs the annoying.

 

[mom2rb]

I have another one and it is actually a good one for me. I am not allowed to play with knives. When we first started dating, I decided to learn how to cook. I was very clumsy and I kept cutting myself. Ever since then DH has done all of the cutting. If I am making dinner he comes in the kitchen and cuts all of the vegetables. It's really funny. In fact if I am cooking when he is at work, my boys will come in the kitchen and tell me that I am supposed to wait for daddy. The day before Thanksgiving, DH was up half the night chopping everything for me to cook in the morning.

 

[Feeln'Froggy]

My husband drives with two feet brake-gas, brake-gas, brake-gas.
He can not maintain a constant speed to save his life.
In town it's fine but on the interstate it drives me MAD!
Head forward – Head back - Head forward – Head back you get the picture.

 

[SnowWhite607]

Practices his golf swing (like PP's DH) in the morning, when we are out, at a party, wherever. Yes, you golf. We get it.

Sings. All the time. Off key. And thinks he sounds great.

Throws socks in the floor and does not pick them up.

Eats ice cream from a coffee mug. I dont know why this bugs me so much but it does. Use a bowl.

I have a basket for his wallet, keys, etc but he never uses it. Then in the morning, proceeds to ask me "have you seen my ______ (keys, wallet, glasses, belt, etc)

Can never find ANYTHING in the house even if it is 6 inches from his face!

Oh these are really funny!

 

[SDFgirl]

I cannot STAND the way my dh loads the dishwasher. I have my system down, and we he loads half a load, I end up rearranging it to finish loading it and it just takes me longer!

Hehe. Maybe we should trade husbands! My DH is constantly re-arranging the dishes after I load them - it drives me up the wall! He says that there is a most efficient way to do it, and my way is NOT it! (He calls me the "Picasso of Dishwasher Loading.")

Oh and the corny jokes...every time we pass a coffee shop that has a sign for "free wifi" he says, "Let's go in there and claim our free wiffie!" Okay, it wasn't funny the first time, much less the following 87 times!

It also drives me nuts that 75% of the time he will come home with the wrong item if I send him to the grocery store for a specific thing.

But, boy do I love him.

 

[mrsheppo]

DH can't make a bed properly to save his life.

He pulls up the sheets and doesn't tuck them in and then the quilt goes directly on top. Usually you can see he had the most covers the night before because most of the quilt is pulled to his side.

 

[arminnie]

He simply refuses to put a new roll of toilet paper on the roller thingy.

I bought one of those that only has one side attached - you just slip it on. I think guys are afraid of that springy thing in the older tp holders.

On the other hand, he sticks his assorted pens, papers, business cards, screwdrivers, screws, batteries, odd bits of small hardware, and whatever else up in the cupboard where the dishes are.

When I moved in with my dad I would clean out a cabinet - have it totally empty and ready to organize. I would come back 3 minutes later and the cabinet would be FULL (every cubic inch) of tools.

DH cannot pour a cup of coffee without making a mess. There's a trail of coffee all over the kitchen every morning and my counters were always stained by the coffee pot.

Got that one too.

I can barely take baths because it irritates me to have to go to all the effort to fill the tub and then be way past ready to get out after 3 minutes.

That is so me. I thought I was the only one.

 

[beckmrk04]

It doesn't really aggravate me, but it's something I've always noticed about him. He has to be occupied with something every waking moment. I don't believe in the 15 years we've been together that he's ever just sat in quiet contemplation. Always has to have television, music, or something in the background, and something going on in front of him. Work, games, or a book. Even if he's watching tv or a movie, he's got to have something to occupy him other than that.

A-HA!!!!! This sounds JUST like DH!!!! Always something. He can't even go to the bathroom without a book or magazine.

I'll be sitting in the chair, relaxing- reading a book in the quiet, and he comes in and turns on the computer and tv.

 

[krismom]

He say's he's cleaned up the kitchen, however he'll leave the pots & pans in the sink because they have to "soak". Guess who eventually ends up cleaning the pots & pans?

...and he thinks the dining room table is a personal depository for his stuff. We don't eat in there often- but it's always kept clean and looking nice. After his last fishing trip he laid his poles on top and left them there until I asked where he wanted me to put them.

Still- I'll keep him because those are the only 2 I can think of, and that ain't bad!

 

[beckmrk04]

- these are cracking me up.

I my husband, and I know he has his own list (I'm somewhat guilty of not putting the TP roll back on the thingy ).

 

[Steffi]

DH sneezes loudly and dramatically, usually three times in a row, and when he's done says woo. ACHOOOO, ACHOOOOO, ACHOOOO, WOOOOOO. He says he can't help it, but how can you not help that? It's so irritating, and today he hurt his neck - you guessed it - sneezing.

 

[Michelle67]

DH sneezes loudly and dramtically, usually three times in a row, and when he's done says woo. ACHOOOO, ACHOOOOO, ACHOOOO, WOOOOOO. He says he can't help it, but how can you not help that? It's so irritating, and today he hurt his neck - you guessed it - sneezing.

My husband coughs really loud. Seriously, if you are sitting right next to him it actually hurts your ears. I don't even think I can make a noise that loud.

 

[MushyMushy]

DH sneezes loudly and dramatically, usually three times in a row, and when he's done says woo. ACHOOOO, ACHOOOOO, ACHOOOO, WOOOOOO. He says he can't help it, but how can you not help that? It's so irritating, and today he hurt his neck - you guessed it - sneezing.

I wonder where the woo came from -- that's so funny!

I always think my sister's going to blow a gasket when she sneezes. She does these delicate little "pshee" sounds. That can't be very satisfying.

 

[wvdisluv2]

my husband gets completly stripped down to go to the bathroom.

nad he refuses to go to the bathroom in public, he will hold it an entire day till he gets back home or hotel where we may be staying

Ditto

My husband drives with two feet brake-gas, brake-gas, brake-gas.
He can not maintain a constant speed to save his life.
In town it's fine but on the interstate it drives me MAD!
Head forward – Head back - Head forward – Head back you get the picture.

Again....ditto

Also...sorry if this is TMI...spends Waaaaay to much time in the *ahem* bathroom playing a hand-held solitare game...HE...MUST...WIN!?!.....I swear...his legs HAVE to be numb Sadly, we have ONE bathroom...this can be a serious problem at times

 

[WDWBarb]

I'm the annoying one in my family

The only thing DH does that annoys me is that he never remembers anything I say (mostly 'cause he doesn't listen to me in the first place!).