First and last time inviting people...ARRGH!

[Flyerfan]

DH and I were looking forward to our November trip with family. Now, it may just be the two of us in a 2BR!! SIL is pregnant and is not sure she wants to go and BIL says they are going. To me, it looks like they won't be going. I understand if she's feeling a little unsure with it being her first pregnancy, and as much as I'd like them to go, I certainly would understand if they didn't. However, I would like them to give us a definite before the 31 days. Still don't know if my other BIL will be going...may not know that until last minute, but that we knew right off the bat. I told DH I want to give them a "have to know by" date but he says they may not know that early. Don't you think it's only fair to set guidelines and only fair that they give us time to re-use those points?

That being said, what would be my chances of getting a 1BR in November at the last minute...like say a week or two before?

 

[Disney Princess]

I don't know the answer to your questions about getting a 1 BR, but I wanted to say hang in there. Family is the most wonderful thing in the world, but it can certainly be the most frustrating thing as well. I think you are perfectly fine in giving a "must know by this date" date. If they know you are using points (even if they don't know how it works), hopefully they would understand. You can use the example of paying with cash. There is a certain cancellation date you must use in order to not be "out" the cash/points. They would get that. Hopefully they'll be up for a little trip to the world anyway. My first trip to Disney was in the womb!

Good luck! I'm sure more experienced family-travelers will be along to offer some tips.

 

[SLM]

Do they understand you lose money when you lose points? Maybe they're afraid of hurting your feelings-I'd tell them I'd rather hear "no, we can't do it this time" than lose a week's vacation-if you lose the difference between a 2BR and a 1BR.
SSR is a big resort, so you might be lucky making the switch. Good luck!

 

[wulfekamp]

been there done that. I don't take anyone anymore. I have done it twice and it was a train wreck both times. Wish you the best.

 

[Flyerfan]

Do they understand you lose money when you lose points? Maybe they're afraid of hurting your feelings-I'd tell them I'd rather hear "no, we can't do it this time" than lose a week's vacation-if you lose the difference between a 2BR and a 1BR.
SSR is a big resort, so you might be lucky making the switch. Good luck!

It's a little bit messed up. BIL already has airline booked but, as of today, is a little hesitant in buying the park tickets because SIL doesn't know if she wants to go. He's not very forthcoming with information so it's a little hard communicating with him at times. Either he's not sure how it would affect us point-wise or he just doesn't care. Either way, I'm a little peeved and my anxiety level is rising. I'm already anxious about our trip in 4 days...I always seem to get that way before I go away. This situation isn't helping.

 

[wdrl]

Keep in mind that if you don't take your family on this trip, you could probably take them on another trip in the future. So if I were you, I wouldn't feel bad about asking your family to give you a specific commitment by your cancellation date. If your family trip doesn't work out this year, then perhaps you can do it next year. In the alternative, you could always invite a fellow hockey fan to take the second bedroom!

 

[toniosmom]

I had invited my cousin's 3 (college-age) kids to join us next March. Booked the 2BR for the week they were on spring break at the 11 month mark, etc. Well...they started acting very evasive, so I told them they had to let me know for certain by XXXX date, wanting to make any changes prior to the 7 month window opening. The date came and I emailed them all. As expected, the answer was that they couldn't come, so I quickly changed my week and invited my retired parents to join us instead.

 

[JimMIA]

I told DH I want to give them a "have to know by" date but he says they may not know that early.

"Have to know" means you HAVE TO KNOW. If they are unable to give you a YES, that's a "no." You have to protect yourselves and your future vacations first.

Don't you think it's only fair to set guidelines and only fair that they give us time to re-use those points?

Yes, and it's unfair for anyone not to understand that.

IMHO, neither BIL is a candidate to be a DVC guest. It's understandable that many families cannot plan far in advance, but they are not DVC candidates to me. I'd personally refer both of them to CRO.

If I did leave the invitation open, my drop-dead date would be WELL before 31 days out, and depending on your UY, might be further out still. I'd be sure I was well clear of holding and able to bank in the event of a cancellation.

...what would be my chances of getting a 1BR in November at the last minute...like say a week or two before?

There are two issues with a week or two before. First of all, if you cancel in that time frame, the points go into holding. Hopefully you know what that means, and it's important because you are going to have unused points if you downsize.

Second, I think it's extremely unlikely that you'll be able to get a 1 BR a couple of weeks out. All points inventory goes to CRO 60 days out, so availability will be under pressure from both points guests and cash guests. It's a popular time of the year for DVC, and I'd be surprised if you can get anything last minute.

An alternative, if you have enough points and can do so without having to borrow points or worry about banking deadlines (two BIG ifs), would be to make a 1 BR ressie now as a backup. When you get close to 31 days (and for me, that would be about 40-45 days because I wouldn't take any chances), if everyone is not on board cancel the 2 BR, call it off, and bank the points. Then you and DH stay in the 1 BR.

 

[Chuck S]

Unfortunately, the time to set rules is before you book the reservation.

I have a rule, once we agree to dates, and the reservation are made, no cancelations except for an actual emergency. If you do cancel without it being an emergency, you are never invited back. Period, end of story. There are, so far, two family groups on my "never again" list. Note: Middle school child changing their mind about cheerleading, and going to tryouts is NOT an actual emergency. Pregnancy, I think that qualifies as a legitimate reason, but they need to let you know ASAP.

Other members simply charge anyone for the difference in points between what they normally would get and what they booked to accomodate their guests. That way, if they do cacel, at least they've recouped something from their points and it drives home the fact that timeshares have costs associated with them.

 

[Steamboat Girlie]

been there done that. I don't take anyone anymore. I have done it twice and it was a train wreck both times. Wish you the best.

amen!!!!!!!!!

 

[JimMIA]

Just to clarify, my drop-dead date would be at least 40 days prior to arrival or at least a week before my banking deadline...whichever comes first.

If this trip is late in your Use Year, your banking deadline might be several months prior to your arrival date, but you have to protect yourself.

 

[DenLo]

Keep in mind that if you don't take your family on this trip, you could probably take them on another trip in the future. So if I were you, I wouldn't feel bad about asking your family to give you a specific commitment by your cancellation date.

You also could talk to your SIL and point out that she doesn't have to do rides. She can relax at the pool, shop and walk the parks for exercise (which her doctor probably recommends). And stay inside during the heat of the day. The Unofficial Guide to WDW has a small section for Mothers to Be. The most important point was that your SIL needs to talk to her doctor, he will tell her what activities to limit--like jerky movements, centrifugal/centripetal force. One of the Moms to be recommended buying a cane that turns into a seat so she could sit while in line.

But most of all--you can set a deadline as wdrl stated above. They are your points. Good luck and don't let their indecision ruin your current trip.

 

[jimmytammy]

We can relate, you want so much to share it with others, but then it backfires. It has happened to us on several occasions, and like gluttons, we do it again

I remember someone sorta summing it up here a few yrs ago when a similar subject came up...others that dont own dont have the emotional ties we do, therefore they dont get the stress we do, therefore they dont understand why we do get stressed.

I will send Pixie Dust your way in hopes it all works out for you

 

[Deb & Bill]

You'd need to cancel that two bedroom at least 31 days before the start of the reservation so you wouldn't have points in holding. And getting a one bedroom one or two weeks before the start of your trip is going to be very difficult. Even 31 days out is going to be difficult.

Have you thought about cancelling all together and trying for a different time for your immediate family and leaving the in-laws out completely?

 

[Flyerfan]

You also could talk to your SIL and point out that she doesn't have to do rides. She can relax at the pool, shop and walk the parks for exercise (which her doctor probably recommends). And stay inside during the heat of the day. The Unofficial Guide to WDW has a small section for Mothers to Be. The most important point was that your SIL needs to talk to her doctor, he will tell her what activities to limit--like jerky movements, centrifugal/centripetal force. One of the Moms to be recommended buying a cane that turns into a seat so she could sit while in line.

Well, SIL is from Thailand. She speaks English but it's hard for me to communicate with her...she is still very new to the family.

Have you thought about cancelling all together and trying for a different time for your immediate family and leaving the in-laws out completely?

I would consider this but BIL has the airline booked. I know I shouldn't be concerned about that considering he is not too concerned about backing out at the last minute.

"Have to know" means you HAVE TO KNOW. If they are unable to give you a YES, that's a "no." You have to protect yourselves and your future vacations first.Yes, and it's unfair for anyone not to understand that.

IMHO, neither BIL is a candidate to be a DVC guest. It's understandable that many families cannot plan far in advance, but they are not DVC candidates to me. I'd personally refer both of them to CRO.

If I did leave the invitation open, my drop-dead date would be WELL before 31 days out, and depending on your UY, might be further out still. I'd be sure I was well clear of holding and able to bank in the event of a cancellation.

There are two issues with a week or two before. First of all, if you cancel in that time frame, the points go into holding. Hopefully you know what that means, and it's important because you are going to have unused points if you downsize.

Second, I think it's extremely unlikely that you'll be able to get a 1 BR a couple of weeks out. All points inventory goes to CRO 60 days out, so availability will be under pressure from both points guests and cash guests. It's a popular time of the year for DVC, and I'd be surprised if you can get anything last minute.

An alternative, if you have enough points and can do so without having to borrow points or worry about banking deadlines (two BIG ifs), would be to make a 1 BR ressie now as a backup. When you get close to 31 days (and for me, that would be about 40-45 days because I wouldn't take any chances), if everyone is not on board cancel the 2 BR, call it off, and bank the points. Then you and DH stay in the 1 BR.

If it was strictly up to me, I would want an answer now but DH wants to wait. As far as the other BIL, we would be OK with a 1BR if he comes along but I've been saying all along that I want to know if he's going. He's waiting to see if he gets a layoff from work...then he would go.

I'm aware of holding and I am trying to avoid that. Our use year is June so we have time to use the points. However, some of these points are borrowed so they would have to be used by June which wouldn't be too much of a problem.

We don't have enough points to secure a backup reservation but that's a good idea if we did. I actually thought of switching to a 1BR and Studio and cancel the Studio if need be but it's an extra 28 points. If they did decide they were coming, we would be using more points than if we just kept the 2BR.

 

[toniosmom]

We don't have enough points to secure a backup reservation but that's a good idea if we did. I actually thought of switching to a 1BR and Studio and cancel the Studio if need be but it's an extra 28 points. If they did decide they were coming, we would be using more points than if we just kept the 2BR.

Just throwing out an idea here -- if you request a 2BR lockoff -- could you cancel the studio part if your family drops out? I have no idea, I'm just throwing it out there. I'm sure someone will correct me.

 

[Sandisw]

Just throwing out an idea here -- if you request a 2BR lockoff -- could you cancel the studio part if your family drops out? I have no idea, I'm just throwing it out there. I'm sure someone will correct me.

No, unfortunately, they don't let you do that. You have to cancel the whole thing and rebook.

 

[Anal Annie]

Unfortunately, the time to set rules is before you book the reservation.

I have a rule, once we agree to dates, and the reservation are made, no cancelations except for an actual emergency. If you do cancel without it being an emergency, you are never invited back. Period, end of story. There are, so far, two family groups on my "never again" list. Note: Middle school child changing their mind about cheerleading, and going to tryouts is NOT an actual emergency. Pregnancy, I think that qualifies as a legitimate reason, but they need to let you know ASAP.

Other members simply charge anyone for the difference in points between what they normally would get and what they booked to accomodate their guests. That way, if they do cacel, at least they've recouped something from their points and it drives home the fact that timeshares have costs associated with them.

Sorry, but IMO pregnancy is a condition not an emergency (unless she's been restricted to bed rest).

We tried to plan our August vacation with extended family to celebrate my parents 50th anniversary. I initially mentioned it about 18 months out. We even bought luggage as Christmas gifts for the PREVIOUS Christmas. So here comes January 2009 - our 7 month window. I'd made it VERY clear that the 7 month date was the deadline. Guess what? NOBODY could commit. SO. WE used up all of our points on US this year. And then they all look at us like how could we go for so many days?! But hey, we had 4 wonderful days in May to celebrate DS's 12th birthday and we had a week at BCV and 3 nights at Vero in August. If they'd have gone we'd have been lucky to go one trip for 6 nights. Their loss...and I'm in no hurry to try to plan another family outting.

Best of luck to you....SET A DEADLINE PRIOR TO YOUR 31 DAY WINDOW AND STICK TO IT!!! (But I'd probably call MS tomorrow to see what's available!)

 

[dwelty]

One thing to consider is how far along in her pregnancy she will be in November. Most Airlines (I think all actually) will not let an expectant mother fly in her third trimester. Regardless of weither BIL has bought the tickets already or not. They may not be able to go even if they wanted to.

 

[JimMIA]

One additional caution that has been mentioned in many of these family trip threads. You may be getting "we can't give you a firm answer because of ..." when the real reason is money.

A lot of people - especially those who haven't ever been to WDW, or haven't been in many years - have no idea how expensive a Disney vacation is. They jump at the chance for free lodging and they don't start doing the math until they start buying airfare, checking out park ticket prices, hear that $40 per person per day for food is a bargain, etc.

Pretty soon they realize they will be paying more than they can afford for a vacation they've never actually wanted to take. That's when all sorts of issues start coming up.