Fat Girls

[davedmaine]

It was rude, but certainly wasn't discrimination. Fat people aren't a protected group.

 

[Princess Dolly]

Ok may not be discrimination but definetly a very derogatory term. Think if they substituted a racial or ethnic slur, still not discrimantory but just as insulting.

I would avoid the place.

How is fat derogatory? Isn't it just a description? The description wasn't heifers or cows. I admit I am playing devil's advocate and I wouldn't want to see that on my receipt, but then I am also not fat. An example that would apply to me... I would be upset if I saw wet back on the receipt not so much if it said hispanic/latina/mexican.

 

[scrapquitler]

not to defend the rudeness, but I have a couple of friends who are bartenders. At the bar, people don't sit in one seat with numbers like they sit at numbered tables in the restaurant. My bartender friends have told me (and showed me on their receipt pad) that they keep track of peoples tabs by writing 'something' to tell them who is who. If they know you, they write your name. If they don't know you, they write something physical or obvious (like, REDSOX HAT, or ugly Christmas sweater or red hair). So if that was the thing that made the bartender remember which tab was theirs...so what? I'm a fat girl, and if the bartender wrote FAT GIRL on the top of my tab, well, okay, it's not a lie, I am fat...if I had purple hair, then why not write that? He shouldn't have given them the tab that says that. But really? Do we have to be SO sensitive about EVERYTHING???

 

[Sam81]

Restaurant owner 20+ years. Table numbers don’t always work and some servers make notes to remember who got what.

And I agree, we are becoming so over sensitive to every single issue. What if he wrote “brown haired girls”? Fat is a description; it is not derogatory, racial or condescending.

 

[happygirl]

not to defend the rudeness, but I have a couple of friends who are bartenders. At the bar, people don't sit in one seat with numbers like they sit at numbered tables in the restaurant. My bartender friends have told me (and showed me on their receipt pad) that they keep track of peoples tabs by writing 'something' to tell them who is who. If they know you, they write your name. If they don't know you, they write something physical or obvious (like, REDSOX HAT, or ugly Christmas sweater or red hair). So if that was the thing that made the bartender remember which tab was theirs...so what? I'm a fat girl, and if the bartender wrote FAT GIRL on the top of my tab, well, okay, it's not a lie, I am fat...if I had purple hair, then why not write that? He shouldn't have given them the tab that says that. But really? Do we have to be SO sensitive about EVERYTHING???

I have worked in several restaurant that also have bars, and have never seen a bartenders right out personal comments lke that. It's unprofessional for one thing. I would take that comment as rude. I almost always give restaurant workers a pass on almost everything. This is WRONG

 

[MickeySP]

How is fat derogatory? Isn't it just a description? The description wasn't heifers or cows. I admit I am playing devil's advocate and I wouldn't want to see that on my receipt, but then I am also not fat. An example that would apply to me... I would be upset if I saw wet back on the receipt not so much if it said hispanic/latina/mexican.

Really?!?! You're kidding?: Ok ask how many people consider Fat a compliment.


And yes there are people who would say any of those terms can be used in a derogatory way. I do have a good friend if you call her mexican is insulted, she is Spanish. Just because you are latin does not mean you are mexican. What if I called a Chinese person Korean or Japanese?

My point leave personal descriptors off the check or suffer a backlash. Why not the women with blue sweaters? There were other ways to describe someone other than a personal descriptor.

 

[topolino]

How is fat derogatory? Isn't it just a description? The description wasn't heifers or cows. I admit I am playing devil's advocate and I wouldn't want to see that on my receipt, but then I am also not fat. An example that would apply to me... I would be upset if I saw wet back on the receipt not so much if it said hispanic/latina/mexican.

You're really attempting to have us on this board believe that you don't think that calling a group of women, "the fat girls" is derogatory?

I'm not fat either, but that doesn't mean that I don't understand how cruel and insulting it is to use that term as a descriptor. My guess is that you understand it, too.

 

[happygirl]

Restaurant owner 20+ years. Table numbers don’t always work and some servers make notes to remember who got what.

And I agree, we are becoming so over sensitive to every single issue. What if he wrote “brown haired girls”? Fat is a description; it is not derogatory, racial or condescending.

I would hate to a patron in your restaurant where you think those descriptions are acceptable.

 

[meggiebeth]

How is fat derogatory? Isn't it just a description? The description wasn't heifers or cows. I admit I am playing devil's advocate and I wouldn't want to see that on my receipt, but then I am also not fat. An example that would apply to me... I would be upset if I saw wet back on the receipt not so much if it said hispanic/latina/mexican.

IMO I do think 'fat' is derogatory and unacceptable for a restaurant. The description is 'overweight'. However saying anything about their weight is rude. If I were overweight and someone called me 'overweight girl' I would bs extremely offended even if it were just a description.

Ugly is a description. So 'ugly girl' shouldn't be offensive? But it is very offensive, especially in a restaurant.

I guess that it wouldn't be offensive unless you fit that description. People can be very sensitive about their body. See, I am not Latina or Mexican and I wouldn't find it offensive... But really because I am not and I don't know how it feels (but personally, I would quite like to be Latina..... So pretty!)

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[Sam81]

I would hate to a patron in your restaurant where you think those descriptions are acceptable.

It is just a description. Just like tall, short, skinny, boy, girl…I watched the video and yes those women would be defined as fat, based solely on their appearance. People may like to use other adjectives like overweight or pooh sized, but the generic description is indeed fat.

At my restaurant, I would have fired the server. Not appropriate for a receipt.

 

[okeydokey]

The staff at the restaurant just learned a very expensive lesson. I think some retraining is in order.

 

[penn19]

I'm waiting for Frank to weigh in.

 

[mickeysgal]

IMO I do think 'fat' is derogatory and unacceptable for a restaurant. The description is 'overweight'. However saying anything about their weight is rude. If I were overweight and someone called me 'overweight girl' I would bs extremely offended even if it were just a description.

Ugly is a description. So 'ugly girl' shouldn't be offensive? But it is very offensive, especially in a restaurant.
I guess that it wouldn't be offensive unless you fit that description. People can be very sensitive about their body. See, I am not Latina or Mexican and I wouldn't find it offensive... But really because I am not and I don't know how it feels (but personally, I would quite like to be Latina..... So pretty!)

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

Why especially in a restaurant?

We're getting to the point where any descriptive word is going to be offensive to someone at some point.

 

[Andtototoo]

Restaurant owner 20+ years. Table numbers don’t always work and some servers make notes to remember who got what.

And I agree, we are becoming so over sensitive to every single issue. What if he wrote “brown haired girls”? Fat is a description; it is not derogatory, racial or condescending.

Stupid is a descriptor too. But I bet most people would find that word derogatory.

 

[cluvsdisney]

This is in no way discriminatory. Weight isn't a protected class and they were served food. It's not as though they were turned away at the door and refused service.

It was insensitive and careless of the bartender to use & print the description on the the receipt. It's unfortunate and understandable the girls' feelings were hurt but they received an apology and were offered, what I feel, was adequate compensation and have the choice to not return to the establishment. And all I keep thinking is that now that they went to the press, they are going to be known as "The fat girls who were called fat girls and didn't want to pay their check." I wonder if they feel better about the situation now?

Just in general, I can't stand that apologies are not enough and that things like this goes viral nowadays.

(ps...I am overweight so it's not as though I cannot relate to how these girls felt to seeing themselves described this way. I simply do not understand calling even more attention to a humiliating situation.)

 

[ckay87]

I'm waiting for Frank to weigh in.

OMG...

Anyway, I'm not OVERWEIGHT, but you folks ignorantly claiming "fat" is just a description need to invest in a good thesaurus.

 

[Acklander]

I'm sure there were many other descriptions that the bartender could have used to describe the customers without calling them fat. Especially on a receipt they they would see. What is disturbing is how many people on this thread think its perfectly acceptable to refer to a customer as fat and think the customers are being overly sensitive. Do you not see how that might be hurtful to a person?

 

[NikitaZee]

This is in no way discriminatory. Weight isn't a protected class and they were served food. It's not as though they were turned away at the door and refused service.

It was insensitive and careless of the bartender to use & print the description on the the receipt. It's unfortunate and understandable the girls' feelings were hurt but they received an apology and were offered, what I feel, was adequate compensation and have the choice to not return to the establishment. And all I keep thinking is that now that they went to the press, they are going to be known as "The fat girls who were called fat girls and didn't want to pay their check." I wonder if they feel better about the situation now?

Just in general, I can't stand that apologies are not enough and that things like this goes viral nowadays.

(ps...I am overweight so it's not as though I cannot relate to how these girls felt to seeing themselves described this way. I simply do not understand calling even more attention to a humiliating situation.)

I agree. I'd be mad if that happened to me. Big mistake handing that receipt over to them. Complain to the manager, write a letter to corporate, yep. But going public with it? I don't understand what else they wanted. Public outrage, somebody's job, what? As long as there are fat people (or short people, tatooed people, big nosed people) there will be people thinking it about them. Do they think that will change? So now this particular establishment will tell their people not to write derogatory descriptions on the top of bar tabs. Wouldn't be worth the embarrassment if it were me - but perhaps they're not embarassed.

 

[topolino]

Why especially in a restaurant?

We're getting to the point where any descriptive word is going to be offensive to someone at some point.

Because it's a business and those women are paying customers. Is it really that difficult to comprehend? In what society is it ok for the a business to insult its clientele?

Regardless of the customer/business dynamic, there should be no place in society where a descriptor like "fat" is acceptable.

 

[Stitchfans]

How is fat derogatory? Isn't it just a description? The description wasn't heifers or cows. I admit I am playing devil's advocate and I wouldn't want to see that on my receipt, but then I am also not fat. An example that would apply to me... I would be upset if I saw wet back on the receipt not so much if it said hispanic/latina/mexican.

Really? If you were overweight, you would not mind being called fat? Get real. Any word that points out a insensitive description of a person is wrong and unacceptable. There are plenty of those words. Such as the example you gave. If people thought before they spoke or in this case wrote things down there would be a whole less problems. There is no need to deliberately insult another person due to their appearance. In many cases it is out of the person's control.