family trip to disney

[daleswife]

So we are taking our first "family" trip to Disney World August 15th through the 24th. Im talkin 10 days of 13 people in "the most magical place on earth". However, my sister and her husband NEVER have any money. My parents paid for the whole trip so nothing to worry about there. What I think is that they will decide not to go all together. We have 35 days until we leave and my parents are already out $100 plus hotel fees if they cancel now and more if they wait until the last minute. My sister has made the comment that she and my b-i-l wont have any money when they get there and she dont want to ask mom and dad for $2 to buy a coke. I keep telling my parents that they are gonna back out last minute and that she should just ask them flat out if they are going to avoid losing anymore money. I guess I pushed one too many buttons with dear ol mom cause she got mad at me. (Along with the fact that she is thinking about buying a house for my sister and bil and the kids, in which the bil NEVER has a job and aggervates my sister to no end. I told her if she wanted to go into bankruptcy thats her business.) It makes me and my lil sister mad that she would even think of doing that. But what can we do???
My question is should I just not say another word and let it go where it goes?

I just hate to see them lose anymore money.

P.S. my sister is bipolar and off her meds and is very prone to aggervation. any little thing will set her off. not to mention big crowds at disney!!!

what do I do?????

 

[Ellester]

Personally, I would just keep quiet. Your parents have to make their own decisions about how to spend their money. I agree that it must be frustrating for you and your other sister, but to keep the peace with your parents I would suggest taking a "just grin and bear it" attitude. Try to have fun on the trip no matter what your sister and BIL do. I don't think anything you say to your parents will do anything else than upset them.

 

[chrissiecutie]

I have a very similiar situation! My parents were paying for all 10 of us to go to Disney for a week. The money was coming from our family business in which my Dad, DH and brother all work. However, recently the trip was cancelled because of the economy. My dad figured it was better to have money in the bank just in case, rather then the trip to Disney. Smart choice!

Well my parents were going to pay for everything for my deadbeat brother, his meth head wife and their out of controll 4 year old. Can you tell I have some issues there! On the other hand, my husband and I and our son were going to be paying for all our food, tickets, souvies etc and were just so thankful the business was paying for the plane and hotel.

Fast forward, now the trip is off. My SIL freaks out and screams at my brother ALL DAY while he at work, with my dad and DH no less. Kept calling him every 10 mins, yelled at my parents and has the NERVE to refuse to go into my parents house to pickup her child!! Can we say ungrateful!

The worst thing about this is that my parents just don't see it! How can they not recognize this bad behavior?? My brother has spent his entire life sponging off my parents, dropped out of high school, moved his teenage prego gf (now wife) into my parents basement and lived rent free for almost 5years while my mom quit her job to watch their child!! I could go on and on, don't get me started!

My sister and I have lived with this our entire lives. If anyone out there says parents don't play favorites...come visit our family for awhile! So what have we done to solve this?? Well, after years of trying to point out the issues and getting no where, we have finally given up. I'm resigned to the fact that this is never going to change and I just need to make the best of a bad situation. My brother will always walk on water and in turn so will his wife and child. We now severly limit our time spent with them (hard to do when your DH works with loser brother) and refuse to take anymore "family" vacations with them. In fact, this planned trip that was cancelled, we coming the first part of the week and they were coming the second part. That way we wouldn't have to spend our Disney time with them! Which of course my parents still don't understand.

My point...let it go. Your parents are adults and they will make their own decisions. Do what you need to do for your own family and hope your parents will someday figure it out! By the way, we are going in August while my brother, SIL and their kid sit at home!!

 

[daleswife]

it just sucks cause my sister and BIL FIGHT constantly. over stupid stuff. Ever hear that dane cook comedy bit about wheres the Strawberry jam??? If so THATS THEM!!! it got so bad that my nephew told them to just divorce and get it over with!!! I hate to see the kids in that situation, but I refuse to feel sorry for her or him because they dont have anything. and expect my parents to just hand anything they want to them on a silver platter!?!?!?!!? When my lil sister needs something she cant even ask mom and dad for help cause they have already given to the other sister!!! But the fighting....OMG the fighting. I just want to strangle them!!!! I told my mom and dad I'd try to keep my mouth shut durring this trip, but I wasnt promising anything. My lil sis said the same thing. I guess we'll just have to avoid them. Sad huh???

 

[gracefor5]

IMHO, stay neutral like Switzerland and make sure you carve out plenty of time during the trip for just your immediate family. Too much time in the loony bin could make anyone go crazy!!

Kim

 

[chrissiecutie]

You're right! It's so sad that you have to "avoid" family. I've learned that sometimes it's just best that way. It didn't use to be so bad until we both had kids. My son is 3.5 and my brothers is 4.5, both are boys and unfortunatly my brother compares my son to his ALL the time! He even tells my parents they can't buy both their grandkids similiar toys and says we can't take our son to Jump Planet (inflatable jump place) because his kid goes there...as if!! His kid has no manners and beats up on mine every time we see them. This is the main reason we started limiting our time with them. Doesn't matter who it is, but if someone hurts my child, watch out!

But it's been a very hard thing to do, especially since my parents just don't get it! Trying to talk to them is like a hitting a brick wall. We are only having one child and I really hoped my son and his cousin could be close, like brothers. It's just so sad that probably won't happen now.