Dumb joke thread

[Cyndiu]

How many dumb ones do we know? I'll start...

Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

 

[goofygirl]

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony
wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

 

[chadfromdallas]

Here's one for you old folks...

When are feet on your face?
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When they are crow's feet!

 

[lewdyan1]

A guy walks into a bar-


ouch!

 

[Angelrose]

What's a z ebra? 25 sizes larger than an A bra.

Sorry, don't hit me.

 

[Cindyluwho]

OK, how about this one

A grasshopper walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a rum & coke."

the barkeeper tries to make conversation and says, "you know, we have a drink named after you."

the grasshopper says, "Leonard?"

Bad, bad, bad joke.

 

[Twinkles6892]

2 guys walk into a bar.

Well that's stupid, the 2nd guy should have seen it.

 

[Tina]

Why did the Punk Rocker cross the road?







He was stapled to the chicken.

 

[DVCLiz]

How did the Easter Bunny make gold soup?

He added fourteen carrots.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

There is one a woman I used to work with thought this joke was hysterical. We made fun of her for YEARS over this...LMBO!

What was the last thing George Washington said to his men before they got in the boat to cross the Delaware?
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"Get in the boat."

 

[BrerLizzie]

Yet another bar joke

A man walk into a bar and his wife ducked.

no wait, this is my very favorite!

After everything I say, say so did the little old lady!
I went to the pond (so did the little old lady)
I skipped a rock (so did the little old lady)
I saw a frog (so did the little old lady)
It croaked (so did the little old lady!)

haha get it, she croaked?

 

[wvjules]

OK, how about this one

A grasshopper walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a rum & coke."

the barkeeper tries to make conversation and says, "you know, we have a drink named after you."

the grasshopper says, "Leonard?"

Bad, bad, bad joke.

 

[goofygirl]

A dyslexic guy walks into a bra...

 

[Cyndiu]

A jumper cable walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

 

[DisMN]

This guy was lonely and he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So, he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede which came in a little white box to use for his house.

He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar to have a drink.

He asked the centipede in the box "would you like to go to Frank's Bar with me and have a beer?" But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked again, "how about going to the bar and having a drink with me?" But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet.

So, he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. he decided to ask one more time, this time putting his face up against the centipede's house and started shouting, 'HEY IN THERE!! WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO FRANK'S BAR AND HAVE A BEER WITH ME?"







A tiny little voice came out of the box and said: "I heard you the first time! I'm putting on my freakin' shoes!"

 

[brermomof2]

Man these are dumb.

But I'm laughing at them.

 

[AllyandJack]

Did you hear the one about the guy who fell into the eyeglass machine?
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He made a complete spectacle of himself.

 

[transparant]

Two cows were standing in a field.

One cow said, "Moo".

The other cow said, "Hey . . . I was going to say that."


Two birds are sitting on a perch

One says to the other, "do you smell fish?"

 

[MeanLaureen]

How do you make a tissue dance?
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You put a little boogie in it!

 

[swanmom]

Where do you find a dog with no legs?
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......... right where you left him!