I, Ninja Mom, have decided to write the trip report for a trip I have not even taken. Thats right,
Im writing Dees trip report for her. Isnt that nice of me to save her the trouble and
fill you all in on her trip before shes even taken it.
This has got to be a first in Trip Report history! The way I figure it
we all know Dee and we know just exactly what is going to happen on her trip so we might as well put it out there and then we can see how close we came to predicting her actual trip. If youre not understanding this dont worry, its just Ninja Mom Math. That means its not supposed to make any sense anyway
..
Of course any good trip report starts with a pre-trip report so here goes
(NM writing as Dee): OH BOY am I excited! My trip is right around the corner!! Im not much of a packer and Ive talked everyone into taking just one carry on so we can hit the magical express ASAP! We can do laundry if we need to or, failing that, just go swimming with our clothes on. The chlorine in the pool will take care of any laundry problems and save us time to boot! I have packed all of my cameras and each of the boys is responsible for packing for themselves. I am so ready to go! I have planned out my trip to the minute and I have all my rope drop strategies in place. BRING IT! tour groups cause Im going to dance right around you!
Departure day:
(NM writing as Dee): Well we are at the Airport. Mark forgot one of the boys but I pointed out that we had way too much room in the car so we turned back right away and pried the missing boy out of bed and into the car. How his brother failed to point out his absence is a mystery that only time will solve. We got through security just fine and I stopped at the airport Dunkin Donuts to tank up before the plane takes off. Younger son and I are bouncing off the wall with excitement while the rest of the family tries to blend in with the seasoned Disney travelers taking the same plane down. I am easy to spot as I am wearing my Beach Club t-shirt, My Disney Crocs and my long eared Goofy hat. No one is asking me if I am going to Universal thats for sure!
WE have arrived at the airport! I got the heebie jeebies when I got on the airport monorail and there was no announcement that said ¡Por favor manténgase alejado de las puertas!. WHAT is wrong with these people! The people at the Magical Express REALLY liked my Goofy ears hat. Gotta love people who appreciate true Disney Style!
OMG!!!! WE are AT THE BEACH CLUB!!! The greeter saw me walking up wearing my Goofy ears hat and excused herself to go on a break. Dont worry, Ill catch her later! Our room is fantastic! It has hot and cold running water and indoor plumbing. The carpets are flat and the fridge is cold. Im in heaven!!! We threw our carry ons into the room and ran immediately to one of the parks. We rode the rides until the parks closed and security escorted us from the premises. On the way out we asked if we could get fast passes for tomorrow but they said no and put us on a bus back to the hotel.
DAY TWO: I have been up since the crack of O-Dark-Thirty patrolling the lobby in search of coffee and that Greeter. I thought I spotted her hiding behind a potted palm but she disappeared when I got close. Tomorrow I am going to take off my Goofy ears hat and see if I can sneak up on her. We rode more rides, ate too much and swam in Storm Along Bay. Who needs pool chairs when you never get out of the pool!
DAY THREE: After we hit rope drop and rode every ride that had not yet broken down we went back to the hotel for a swim. Before I jumped in the pool I ran around and removed every abandoned towel on an empty lounge chair. The life guards gave me a standing ovation!
DAY FOUR: It rained today and we got a little wet. Everyone in the family is Wash and Wear so we will be just fine. We really enjoyed that air conditioned bus ride back to the resort while we were sopping wet from the rain. I was so cold I started to turn blue! Oh well
its nothing that a trip to the hot tub cant fix!
DAY FIVE: Today we had the big lunch date with Buzzy the Fly at Hurricane Hannahs. I cheated and snuck over a real Lobster Roll from the Boardwalk Bakery. All the people eating the Seafood roll they serve at Hannahs were jealous of my pure bread lobster roll and were making dog eyes at me. I discovered it was filled with those Florida Lobsters who are really just posers and are a pale imitation when it comes to my Boston Beauties. A girl has got to compromise when she is on the move!
DAY SIX: Still cant find that greeter! Its like she knows I am coming and she hides from me! More rides, more swimming, too much food and not enough coffee. This is the life I tell you! I plan to leave a trail of pretzel bread and Tastykakes and see if I can trap that greeter once and for all....
DAY SEVEN: Sadly its check out day. We are out of clean laundry anyway so we might as well leave. We have left no ride unridden, no snack unconsumed and no pool chair with an abandoned towel on it. Id say this trip has been a success! I never did catch up with that greeter. She seems to have an abundance of hiding places and a fear of Goofy Ears hats. Ill just have to pop in during my school trip in the spring and see if I can catch her then. We are packing up and heading towards the dark side, meaning the Park that shall not be named. While there we shall ride all the rides, eat too many snacks and swim in far inferior pools. If it were up to me Id just stay at the Beach Club, but the kids insist on spending their inheritance at this other place. Oh well
. Maybe one day I will run away from home and run back to the Beach Club, this time all by myself, with my sunken treasure, my kitchen sink and especially my Goofy Ears Hat. Heck! A girl can only dream!
Oops! It seems I've finished my trip report in one sitting. No thirty billion chapters and endless teases for this vacation. Looks like I will have to go back to the Beach Club again and gather new material for another, less brief trip report. Tune in next time for another one of my epic reports..... this time it won't be written by that list huzzy Ninja Mom, I PROMISE!
Signed Dee (But really it's Ninja Mom
)
