My sister in law called yesterday and one of her cousins is having a combined baby shower and wedding shower. She wants to bring me with her but I did not recieve an invitation. Now my husbands family is not very formal and I love them but ettiquette is not their forte. I am unsure what to do. My SiL wants me to go with her and thinks the reason I did not recieve an invitation (her mother and sister did) is not personal but because they were too lazy to get my address (that is not an insult. It's about par for Gene's family). I, on the other hand, would never dream of attending a function I was not invited to. There may be some reason I was not invited. I am just on the fence here. I have thought about calling my husbands aunt and just talking to her. I think we are on good enough terms after 14 years to do this. We are very friendly but not terribly close. We hug when we see one another and she has come to every family function we have ever had. We invite her to all of them and she comes.
I just don't know what to do here. I will send a gift either way but don't want to horn in where I do not belong but if this was just an oversight and they expect my sister in law to bring me (this would be sort of like them) then they will be hurt I did not come. I am just lost here.
I also don't want the aunt to feel she has to invite me if I call her. I want to be honest and say, "Look I completly understand if you are not inviting me because you must limit your guest list"... Would that be bad? How about calling and saying congratulations and where can I send a gift? But she may not know I did not recieve an invitation.
Again I strongly suspect this was just a "whose address do we have, the rest of the family will pass the word" but I could very much be wrong and don't want any hurt feelings.
I just don't know what to do here. I will send a gift either way but don't want to horn in where I do not belong but if this was just an oversight and they expect my sister in law to bring me (this would be sort of like them) then they will be hurt I did not come. I am just lost here.
I also don't want the aunt to feel she has to invite me if I call her. I want to be honest and say, "Look I completly understand if you are not inviting me because you must limit your guest list"... Would that be bad? How about calling and saying congratulations and where can I send a gift? But she may not know I did not recieve an invitation.
Again I strongly suspect this was just a "whose address do we have, the rest of the family will pass the word" but I could very much be wrong and don't want any hurt feelings.
