Does your 10/11 year old believe in Santa still?

[bdcp]

Our boys (31 and 34) figured it out by age 7-7.5 and it didn't ruin anyone's Christmas after that. It's a rite of passage growing up to realize reality and to help with the fun for the younger kids they knew. My sisters and I figured it out by age 10. Our kids also always have known what Christmas is really all about. We also never did the Easter bunny thing but they still got baskets every year. Tooth fairy was good until they were about 7 or 8, but they still got cash, just like they continued to get gifts at Christmas.

 

[lorijohnhill]

My mother and two brothers are disgusted with me for allowing my 11 yr old daughter to continue believing in Santa. I feel she will come to a conclusion on her own, in her own time. She has had to grow up fast in many ways. In this way, I want her to be a kid as long as possible. Why rush it? I think we could all use a little magic in our lives.

 

[mom2rtk]

My mother and two brothers are disgusted with me for allowing my 11 yr old daughter to continue believing in Santa. I feel she will come to a conclusion on her own, in her own time. She has had to grow up fast in many ways. In this way, I want her to be a kid as long as possible. Why rush it? I think we could all use a little magic in our lives.

Disgusted? That sounds a little over the top. Sorry your family feels that way.

 

[Klayfish]

In this way, I want her to be a kid as long as possible. Why rush it? I think we could all use a little magic in our lives.

Our 10 year old twins still believe, especially DD10. She's hook, line and sinker. We plan to tell her at the end of the school year this year. Our concern is that a child in middle school could get teased relentlessly about it. Besides, at 10, it's just our opinion, but it feels a little weird for a kid that old to still believe.

 

[luvsJack]

Our 10 year old twins still believe, especially DD10. She's hook, line and sinker. We plan to tell her at the end of the school year this year. Our concern is that a child in middle school could get teased relentlessly about it. Besides, at 10, it's just our opinion, but it feels a little weird for a kid that old to still believe.

Your kid, your decision, of course. We all have to do what we think is best.

But I have to ask, have you actually experienced kids getting teased about Santa? I know I haven't.

Worked with kids that age for years and honestly it wasn't something they talked about. They talk about Christmas and what gifts they received but I honestly never heard one mention Santa, as in going to see him or writing him letters or in a way that proved a kid didn't or didn't believe. I think so many of them are on the cusp of believing/not believing that they just choose not to talk about it.

 

[karmic]

DD and DSil are almost 31 and DS will be 29 on New Years Day and their gifts still come from Santa

 

[china mom]

My son (now 15) figured it out very young and specifically asked me to confirm or deny. He has known for years now.

My daughter, age 13 and in 6th grade, still believes. I am almost positive that she isn't just faking me out but that she truly believes. My son and I have been arguing about this. he is passionate that she should be told before kids tease her but I can't bring myself to tell her. Every year I tell myself that "this has to be the year she figures it out"

Apparently we had a 7th grade teacher kind of spill the beans in class this year and he got a ton of angry emails from parents whose kids came home asking questions so I guess my daughter isn't the only one.

Pretty sure that she still thinks all of the Disney characters are real too. She just watched a documentary about Walt Disney and was asking me a bunch a questions, including about his death. Then she said something about Mickey still being alive because she had just spoken to him at the park.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Both of my kids at 10 asked me to tell them the truth. I asked if they were sure and they said yes, so I told them that a long time ago Santa Claus was alive (as Saint Nicholas). He loved children so much, he'd always give them gifts of toys and sweets. He passed away, like we all eventually do, and the children loved him so much that when they became parents, they carried on his tradition. This has been passed from parent to child for generation after generation.

My oldest was angry. He said I made him look like a fool because he defended Santa Claus at school. He's since told me he's glad we pretended he was real for so long.

My youngest was a little sad and said, "can we still pretend that I don't know the truth?" So we still do, even though he's 14 now.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I'm quite content being a humbug, thank you.

If the rest of you are content with babying and helicoptering your children and sheltering them from the real world, be my guest. I hope you have some funds set aside for their future therapy bills.

Wow.

 

[Lilacs4Me]

Still pertinent!

My older two (17 and 13) stopped believing around 8 or so. 2nd or 3rd grade. They are very logical children lol and figured out early that the "story" was impossible by scientific standards.

DS11 (12 in Feb), when pressed last year by me, when he was 10 and in 5th grade:

ME: So what do you know about Santa?
HIM: (shrug) I guess he is the one who brings presents
ME: How do you think he gets millions of toys to kids all around the world in one night?
HIM: (looked at me for a minute, then sighs) Honestly, as long as I get presents under the tree on Christmas morning, I don't really care how they get there

LOL

This year, he confessed that he has known the truth since he was about 9 but since he was the youngest, he was scared to tell me and ruin Christmas for his older siblings lol. We stopped putting money under his pillow when he found out about the tooth fairy and he was worried we would stop giving Christmas presents, too, once he had figured it out.

BUT....we are worried about our Nephew whom we have recently taken guardianship of, also in 6th grade and 11 years old. He truly does believe in Santa, and even when gently pressed with logical thinking like "how can he get presents to millions of kids in one night", his answer was "power boosters", which told me that he still wasn't able to connect the logic of Santa with the myth. He is immature in many ways compared to other 11 year old 6th graders - he still plays with Spiderman figures, and loves Pokemon, doesn't like to bathe or comb his hair, etc - and we have reason to believe he may have some developmental delays as well that we are starting the testing process on in the new year. We think that he just hasn't hit the level of cognitive thinking yet where he can analyze abstract concepts or deductive reasoning. He seems to us to be more of a 8-9 year old level in pretty much every area of development, so it only makes sense to us that he still believes in Santa. The problem is, he is in 6th grade. He has said to us that some kids still believe and some don't, but the kids who don't will still get presents anyway, and we didn't have the heart to tell him any different. It will be interesting to see how he develops over the next year.

 

[disny_luvr]

Your kid, your decision, of course. We all have to do what we think is best.

But I have to ask, have you actually experienced kids getting teased about Santa? I know I haven't.

Worked with kids that age for years and honestly it wasn't something they talked about. They talk about Christmas and what gifts they received but I honestly never heard one mention Santa, as in going to see him or writing him letters or in a way that proved a kid didn't or didn't believe. I think so many of them are on the cusp of believing/not believing that they just choose not to talk about it.

I agree with this. I teach in a middle school and I never, ever hear students talk about Santa - not in my class, during lunch duty, when I’m monitoring the hallways, never. My twins go to the same school I teach in. I just asked them a few days ago if anyone mentioned Santa and they said not that they heard.

Speaking of my twins, we told them (11-years-old) a couple of months ago about Santa. We did it mostly for selfish reasons in that I was just tired of sneaking around, waiting up super late on Christmas Eve for my boys to fall asleep so I could put the presents out, using different wrapping paper, having a co-worker write out the gift tags. I was so worried that Christmas would lose the magic, but I’m happy to report it didn’t. We had a fabulous holiday and it was still special for my boys.

 

[Lilacs4Me]

I agree with this. I teach in a middle school and I never, ever hear students talk about Santa - not in my class, during lunch duty, when I’m monitoring the hallways, never. My twins go to the same school I teach in. I just asked them a few days ago if anyone mentioned Santa and they said not that they heard.

Speaking of my twins, we told them (11-years-old) a couple of months ago about Santa. We did it mostly for selfish reasons in that I was just tired of sneaking around, waiting up super late on Christmas Eve for my boys to fall asleep so I could put the presents out, using different wrapping paper, having a co-worker write out the gift tags. I was so worried that Christmas would lose the magic, but I’m happy to report it didn’t. We had a fabulous holiday and it was still special for my boys.

Just pointing out - middle school kids are smart enough to bully and tease out of earshot of adults....

That being said, I also think that most parents are smart enough to tell their 9-12 year olds not to say anything to peers that still might believe so as not to ruin their day (and so that angry parents aren't blowing up Mom and Dad's phones with angry messages that your kid ruined Christmas for their kid lol).

 

[TLSnell1981]

Never had "that" discussion with my children and never will. If you don't believe, you don't receive.

 

[disny_luvr]

Just pointing out - middle school kids are smart enough to bully and tease out of earshot of adults....

That being said, I also think that most parents are smart enough to tell their 9-12 year olds not to say anything to peers that still might believe so as not to ruin their day (and so that angry parents aren't blowing up Mom and Dad's phones with angry messages that your kid ruined Christmas for their kid lol).

I agree that most kids are smart enough to bully and tease out of earshot of adults, however, I hear and see a lot of that, too. I’m always shocked at what some kids say/do to others while I’m standing there listening and watching.

We told our twins to not say a word to anyone about Santa. Some of their friends still believe (or so their parents think) and I don’t want any parents upset because my boys ruined it for their kids.

 

[TLSnell1981]

One of the most idiotic responses on a Christmas thread I have ever read.



One of the best responses I have ever read.

The rare occasion, where we completely AGREE!

 

[luvsJack]

Just pointing out - middle school kids are smart enough to bully and tease out of earshot of adults....

That being said, I also think that most parents are smart enough to tell their 9-12 year olds not to say anything to peers that still might believe so as not to ruin their day (and so that angry parents aren't blowing up Mom and Dad's phones with angry messages that your kid ruined Christmas for their kid lol).

Sure they do, but at least one teased kid is going to say something. Or someone is going to do some teasing within ear shot. They aren't all that smart. Working at a public school for a few years, I never saw one indication that Santa was ever an issue.

Too many at the younger range either aren't sure or still believe themselves.

 

[bushdianee]

I have a niece that just turned 12 and in 6th grade. She hasn't believed in the tooth fairy or Easter Bunny for a couple of years but was on the fence about Santa until this year. She just didn't see her dad buying some of the gifts she got in the past. Just a couple of weeks ago I confirmed her suspicions after she reacted to a radio commercial that confirmed to me that she knew. She wasn't upset at all, actually happy that her dad had bought her things like an iPad. My DSIL is from another culture that doesn't have Santa so my brother gives me the $ and I do the shopping, wrapping and hiding at my house. We are super close so many times she gives me ideas that she give at home. I also have a 10 year old nephew in another family who still really believes. He is a little behind maturity wise so I can see him believing for a while yet.

 

[Patience]

My 10 year old fifth grader still believes. I doubt she will next year. No worries. Santa still brings a gift and fills my 23 year old daughter's stocking. She graduates from grad school in May, became engaged earlier this month, and will be married by next Christmas so that's going to be a big adjustment for me though!

 

[PennyInPink]

We never encouraged the Santa idea. It was something "fun" to think about, like the tooth fairy, or the Easter Bunny. Too many kids are devastated with the idea that parents lied all that time. We taught that some kids believe, and leave them alone about it, but didn't want our kids to become skeptical about our core beliefs as well. (The Nativity is real. Disney princesses are "fun".)

 

[luvsJack]

Not meaning to pick on you, pp, I have never understood "they may be devastated" or stop trusting their parents.

Kids all over the world believe in Santa and stop believing without either of those issues

I really think if your child is devastated about Santa, either you and your child have lead a truly blessed life or there is more than meets the eye there. If they stop trusting you over Santa, there has to be more going on than Santa.

Most kids have the ability to tell why the fantasy of Santa was kept up by parents and to still believe in other things like religious beliefs. For most, by the time they stop believing, they have the reasoning skills to figure all that out. I don't think we give them enough credit.