Do your adult children get drunk in front of you?

[LiLIrishChick63]

i know some friends that drink with their parents and i don't really see anything wrong with it, so long as they're old enough and they're not driving themselves home. you're all adults by that point, there's nothing wrong with it.

my mother, on the other hand, gets upset if i use the word "hell" so there's no way. i had one drink one time at my cousins campsite when i was 21 and she gave me a dirty look for the rest of the night...so i try not to even talk about drinking if i can help it.

 

[TifffanyD]

My mom made me Jello Jiggler Egg shots and the little jelly bean ones too!

Nice!!!

My mom is coming to watch our place and dog
For a vacation and she is most excited about walking to the pub to meet our peeps. Lol

 

[WowLookAtThat]

I have drinks in front of my parents but I won't get drunk. I learned my lesson from my very few times of getting drunk in front of my mom. She doesn't scold but will happily tell stories during the holidays so I now have a couple of drinks and stop myself No one wants to hear the story of how I got drunk and spent half an hour trying to figure out how to open a door again.

 

[sunshinehighway]

I will be getting what I consider drunk in front of my parents tomorrow. Family cookout. For once, I don't have to drive so I will be having more than my usual 1 or 2 beers. I won't be sloppy or falling down.

I think the problem is there are many degrees of drunk and what constitutes drunk for one person may not for someone else. Some posters have mentioned never having a drink in front of their parents or their kids having a drink in front of them, some being "tipsy", some mentioned stories of sloppy drunkiness.

To me, tipsy means drunk. If I wouldn't drive, then I'd call it drunk. I'm not a large person so that could mean having 2 or 3 beers.

 

[Robbi]

I will be getting what I consider drunk in front of my parents tomorrow. Family cookout. For once, I don't have to drive so I will be having more than my usual 1 or 2 beers. I won't be sloppy or falling down.

I think the problem is there are many degrees of drunk and what constitutes drunk for one person may not for someone else. Some posters have mentioned never having a drink in front of their parents or their kids having a drink in front of them, some being "tipsy", some mentioned stories of sloppy drunkiness.

To me, tipsy means drunk. If I wouldn't drive, then I'd call it drunk. I'm not a large person so that could mean having 2 or 3 beers.

Tipsy, to me, means relaxed after a few sips. I won't drive after having 1 drink not because I'm drunk but because my reflexes are not as sharp as they are if I haven't had a drink.

 

[sunshinehighway]

Tipsy, to me, means relaxed after a few sips. I won't drive after having 1 drink not because I'm drunk but because my reflexes are not as sharp as they are if I haven't had a drink.

Tipsy to me means two or three drinks (depending on the drink and amount of time) and starting to feel it. Some poster have mentioned having a few glasses of wine at dinner but not being drunk. I don't know, for me that'd be tipsy so I'd consider that drunk.

 

[stargazer2892]

I have drank in front of my parents but never gotten drunk. However I have seen my mom drunk twice, both as an adult after big events with just DH, DDad, and her around. Being drunk around my parents isn't something that I'm comfortable with, heck the only person I don't mind being drunk around is DH even then we don't really drink anymore since having DS. But I don't think twice of ordering a beer or glass of wine when we go out to eat with them.

 

[Micca]

Sure. It's not a regular thing, but it happens. Lots of holidays, weddings, etc.

 

[PelletierBears]

My husband, his father and his brother are all recovering alcoholics and very involved in AA. So there are no alcoholic drinks at any of our celebrations.

I have a glass of wine, maybe every other month.

DD, age 9, will probably be encouraged to avoid alcohol altogether because of the alcoholism that runs in the family.

Not much partying going on here in the Miles household. Sorry!

I don't care what other people choose to do, as long as they don't drive drunk and are safe when they are intoxicated. But I also don't find drunk people amusing or funny. It's just not my scene.

My experience is similar to yours...alcoholism runs in all 3 sides of my family (2 biological - 1 step) and it has been tragic all around. I had fun as a late teen into my early twenty's, before I got married, partying but I made an unconscious decision to never drink in front of my kids because of how I, my siblings and all my cousins grew up. Now that my kids are older I'll have a sangria once in a while if we're out but I will never have more than one in front of them. It comes from seeing too many adults out of control when I was young.. and I mean falling down, fighting, passed out, etc.

I'm open with my kids about my hang up. I never wanted them to think alcohol itself was evil or that someone having a drink was bad but I do want them to understand that adiction runs in the family and is something to be careful of.

So to those who feel the OP is being judgemental maybe she is... but she may have a good reason to be. I don't want to be around people who are drunk. It was fun when I and my friends were young but it's not fun or attractive once you reach a certain age... it's just sad.

To answer the OP's question, my kids are still too young to drink so, no.

 

[Aaeolien]

I have gotten tipsy in front of my mother- but only after I was 21... And oddly enough, I hate the tipsy feeling so much, that I rarely drink more than one drink.

My DS is 20, he spent his freshman and part of sophomore years in college as the designated sober- to make sure everyone got home safe. We've talked a lot about responsible drinking, and how I prefer he wait until he is 21- but he did come and tell me when he started drinking at parties in sophomore spring semester. He's such a type A personality, he strictly schedules his drinking to not interfere with homework, exams, quidditch practice, etc. So at Easter dinner, I offered him some wine, and he accepted- knocked it back, actually. Short conversation later, and we agreed that social drinking around mom is ok, but college varsity level drinking in front of mom is a no-no.

Quidditch practice. I want to goto that school and I am 35. Lol.

 

[low-key]

I just don't think that's a good ideal, but all family's have different dynamics

 

[BGK]

Ah, (South) Florida

Indeed. Just passed twenty-eight years here, and still this place never fails to find new ways to break my heart.

Then comes mid-October, when the heat finally breaks and the sky turns china blue and I get to open all my windows and sit on my lanai every afternoon with my four-legged children. It feels as if the finger of God himself comes down and touches the ground and tells us this is why we put up with the summers and storms and the idiotic politicians and all the people Hell-bent on ruining a truly beautiful place. I turn to my friends and ask them to punch me squarely in the back of the head the next time I complain about anything.

Your pardon, as is my wont on three-day weekends, I've had some friends over for dinner and we killed several bottles of truly fine wine and I'm just being excessive in every way possible.

Back on topic: I was "drunk," by any reasonable measure of the term, in front of my mother on Friday night. My team at work finally finished a truly awful project and we went out to celebrate. As they all know her they insisted she come along (TL;DR, just trust me as to why), which was a bonus as I had a dependable ride home. A very good time was had by all.

 

[Pakey]

I'm currently finishing my 2nd grapefruit margarita on the rocks, made for me by my 32 year old son.

 

[handinpocket]

Yeah, I throw down with my folks when we do decide to drink. We like to have a good time and alcohol was always present in our home, nothing taboo.

 

[Lintasare]

Oh yes I drink in front of my parents. Some days I need a drink just to put up with them. And my parents do drink in front of me. I see nothing wrong with it. And yes I have seen both my parents drunks, doesn't bother me. My mom is hilarious when she is drunk and depending on the setting my dad can be quite fun too.

Though I do remember at a family reunion on my mother's side the beer poured freely as my uncles love beer, but only good beer. Budweiser and Coors do not cut it in this family. One of my cousins decided to make fun of Dad. He learned his lesson when I beat him up. Only I get to make fun of my Dad when he is drunk.

 

[superme80]

.

my mother, on the other hand, gets upset if i use the word "hell" so there's no way. i had one drink one time at my cousins campsite when i was 21 and she gave me a dirty look for the rest of the night...so i try not to even talk about drinking if i can help it.

I swear we have the same mother! My uncle added some Bailey's to my coffee when I was 22 and she had a fit!

 

[wdwmom0f3]

I rarely drink but I will have some wine on occasion and most of the time it's at my parents house, but I'm 44 years old. I have minor children so they don't drink, but I would be upset with them if they got trashed drunk around me and my friends. If they had one or two drinks around me it wouldn't bother me though. Falling down drunk is out of the question.

 

[leebee]

DD and I are planning on doing Food and Wine together over Columbus Day weekend, 2014, to celebrate her 21st birthday. We've been planning on this for two years now, and I can hardly wait for next fall! We were in Disney in March 2013 and it was sooooo hard not to let her sip my grand marnier slushie in France! So I guess I would be a no, I don't mind if my kid gets drunk in front of me. Having said that, she's had plenty of opportunity to drink at school and has decided she doesn't like being drunk enough to have a mild headache the next morning, so I am not really worried about her being falling-down drunk, although over the years it'll probably happen that we each drink a little too much while in each other's company.

 

[mr.bungle]

OP here. I was talking about parents condoning their 21yo daughter getting trashed, sloppy drunk. Yep, my parenting skills are superior to that. Sorry if I hit a nerve and you enjoy getting faced with your kids but for me it's a sad thing to watch especially when the parents are bragging about it. Seems you and some others were offended by my post. I just can't apologize for it.
For the record, I drink and I got drunk when I was younger but NOT with my parents or their friends. They DID get plenty drunk in front of me on many occasions. I hated that too.

1) I don't have kids. 2) they're not your family so who cares? Mind your own business, maybe? Let them parent how they want to. At least the kid isn't driving anywhere (presumably). The "kid" is a legal adult and at least if they did get trashed to a dangerous point, the parents are there to take the kid to the hospital. That is obviously the worst case scenario.

Some kids get trashed enough to learn their limits and some don't and as much as you seem to want to, there is nothing you can do about it. You can abstain from visiting said friends if it bothers you that much.

Best case scenario the drunk adult child will get on a reality TV show or something. I mean, isn't that the dream of all millennials anyways?

 

[Hrhpd]

I'm currently finishing my 2nd grapefruit margarita on the rocks, made for me by my 32 year old son.

My 16 year old knows how to properly uncork and serve a fine bottle of wine. He also makes a mean Cosmo.