Do you think I am doing the right thing

[snookhams]

My parents flew to the Channel islands on Monday for a holiday which they had looked forward to for some time as they had not been there for 33 years. I had a phone call tonight from one of their dear friends who they spend alot of time with and holiday with them as well at least once a year, to say that her husband, who had been suffering with prostate cancer, died on Monday, we decided between us not to tell my parents until the weekend, by which time details of the funeral will be known as we both felt that there is nothing they can do and they will feel guilty for not being there to support her. I have sat here on my own now and am worried that my parents will not be happy not to be told immediatly, and I am now arguing with myself over it, so basically would you do the same thins!

 

[natalielongstaff]

i would do what you have done, without a doubt there will be enough upset when they find out so they may as well enjoy their trip.

 

[wickesy]

I agree with Natalie, on balance I think you are doing the right thing.

 

[Claire L]

As you have agreed with this friend not to tell you parents then I feel you have done the right thing. No doubt the friend has plenty of support from family and until the date of the funeral is set there is not alot your parents can do and they deserve to enjoy their holiday.

to you all.

Claire

 

[cherjp]

I would definately do the same as you, think about it this way too your mum and dad will be there for a long time to support their friend and more so at the funeral and afterwards is when she will really need them, so you have done the right thing.

What a kind heart you have.

 

[Nubbedy]

I think you have done the right thing. When details of the funeral are known, you can tell them then.

 

[dennis99ss]

Not really a question for others. You know your parents. What would they want you to do. Personally, I think i would want to know, given they are good friends, and vacation with them at least once a year. Let your folks decide if they want to come baxck or not.....don't make the decision for them. They may resent the fact that you did. One more question.....don't you think they would at least want to call their friend,

 

[mandymouse]

As everyone else has said, I think you've done the right thing

 

[T16GEM]

I think you have done the right thing, they should be able to enjoy their holiday, there is nothing they can can do while they are away anyway.

I left my car at my brothers house while we were in Antigua a few years ago and some masked man tried to break in to steal it, he took it to our local Mitsubishi dealer and left it with them until we got home, my parents decided it was best not to tell us what had happened so that we didn't spend the holiday worrying about what had happened at my Brother's house. I was grateful for that as I was also 10 wks pregnant too!

 

[snookhams]

Thanks for all your replies - I think deep down that I knew I was doing the right thing, I phone my big DS last night and she agrees that we should not tell them until we know funeral details at least. They fly home on Monday afternoon.

 

[Netty]

I think you have done the right thing as well, it must be heart wrenching worrying about it though, sure your parents will understand why their dear friend and you decided not to tell them straight away

 

[wicket2005]

I think you have done the right thing. Your parents can enjoy the holiday and then come back to the news. Really there is nothing they can do to ease the pain of their friend, their friend knows she will have their support on their return. At least your parents will have one less week of sadness to experience.

 

[Trilli-magic]

Yeah you have def. done the right thing.

 

[craigs bride]

huge hugs to you you are doing the right thing

 

[higgy66]

My parents best friends were both very fragile and everytime my parents went away we were left with instructions to keep in touch with their friends to make sure they were both OK. However, it was agreed that if anything "major" should happen i.e. death - then they would not want to know until they get home.