Do you RSVP ??

[disney_me]

Ok, so DD 11, is having her 1st boy/girl halloween party this weekend (10-27). We sent out invitations 2 weeks ago and asked the guest to RSVP by today 10-24 and only half the guest called before tonight. I had to tell DD to tell her friends that if they want to come to the party to PLEASE remind them to have a parent call so I can get a head count.

Am I wrong to be a bit mad that the rest of the party goers have not called?? Dose that mean they are not coming? What if guest just show up....

RSVP to me means you still call to let them know if you can come or not!!!


Oh, I need some halloween indoor games!! (looks like rain on Saturday here)
Have 3 already

 

[bigbabyblues]

I do RSVP. However, last year, only 1 person RSVP'd for DS bday party, and we ended up with about 25 kids.

 

[daisyduck123]

I always RSVP...and I hate it when others don't.

I hope you have a great party!!

 

[ampc3]

yes I always RSVP.. it drives me crazy when others don't!
However I do believe a large number of people who know they are not going , do not RSVP.
But I do believe you will have more kids show up that didn't RSVP...

I usually write rsvp either way please on the invites..
Good luck and have fun!

 

[PrincessBelle39]

This is something that really annoys me. DD had a third birthday party about 3 weeks ago. I knew everyone from her playgroup were coming but had also given out 6 invitations at daycare. Only one of these RSVP'd. Out of the remaining 5, none of them showed up. It broke my heart when dd kept asking, when are my friends coming. Its difficult to prepare. I had made lolly bags and balloons 'just in case'. We always RSVP and also make a special effort to go to each party each dd receives an invitation to as I know the kids look forward to having their friends there.

 

[MSSANDRA]

Yes, i do ,BUT most people do not to children's parties. DB's 1st b-day party is Saturday and 125 people are invited and we have gotten so few RSVP's though we know more are comming.

With 11 year olds, remember mom might not have even seen the invite. Child says," I am invited to ....'s party sat night". mom , "ok, what time?" Some kids will remember to tell mom about the party a hour before it starts!!!

You can always, call parents and just touch base to see IF they got the invite and whether to expect the child. Lot easier than when they were little and you know the parent had seen the invite.

 

[disney_me]

With 11 year olds, remember mom might not have even seen the invite. Child says," I am invited to ....'s party sat night". mom , "ok, what time?" Some kids will remember to tell mom about the party a hour before it starts!!!

This is true, Thats why all week I had been telling DD "Remember to ask your friend if they are coming or not." " I need a parent to call me." And don't you know, one of the boys that is invited lives right next door! His mom could just walk over.

We will see, I still have 2 more days.

 

[donac]

So many people don't RSVP any more. I gave a party for my son's Eagle Ceremony. We invited about 175 people. Only about a 1/2 RSVP'ed and we had to call the other half.

On who did not was my sister who has never even sent him a card to congratulate him on his proud moment.

 

[bellebud]

i always have good intentions to rsvp, and always did 100% of the time when the kids were little, but admit a couple of times when i knew we couldn't go, i didn't because i misplaced the invite or something. when i know we're going, i always rsvp right away, but when i know we can't, it unintentionally gets put on the back burner. Life for everyone is so busy, i can see where parents are rsvping less and less (it happens to us at our parties too). And the other poster who said the parents of an 11 year old might not have even seen the invite is probably right.

i'm going to start putting on our own invitations, rsvp only if coming. I wish everyone would do this. then if i know we're not going, i don't have anything i have to do about it, knim? Life is busy enough, then i'm getting 2 invitations a week to various things i have to call, whether i'm going or not (between the kids and neighborhood things going on, it gets to be a lot).

sorry that happened to you though. i know it's hard to plan. i always have extra goodie bags made w/ stuff we can still use at the house if kids don't show up. hope it works out ok.

 

[Mkrop]

This is something that ABSOLUTELY dirves me insane. I think it is so rude not to RSVP. I have had this happen with bday parties, communions etc. I think the excuse "oh were so busy I forgot" is baloney. Our lives and everyone elses who took the time to RSVP is just as busy as though who could not take the time to pick up the phone. It is just rude!

If I know we cant go to something I immediately call or email while the things is in my hand from the mail and then I throw it away so I dont forget or I make a pile and go through it and then do all my RSVPs at one time.

I have also found putting email down helps anymore. People can email at 11 at night to RSVP when they certainly could not call at that time.

I make the calls and ask, I am busy enough planning and I am not wasting money on extra food or party bags or whatever for people who arent coming. That is not fair to do to the host!

 

[Manda]

For my son's 4th birthday, less than 1/2 of the people RSVPed. I always try to, but I've been known to forget. It happens.

Although, for an 11 year old, I'd think that's the age that should be RSVPing themselves? So, maybe their parents expected them to call/tell your daughter and they didn't.

 

[Manda]

I have also found putting email down helps anymore. People can email at 11 at night to RSVP when they certainly could not call at that time.

Definitely agree with that. I put off RSVPing until I have to usually because my introverted self freaks out about making RSVP calls and then I call at a time where I hope to get voicemail. I'll send out an email immediately and happily.

 

[beattyfamily]

I find it SO very rude not to RSVP.

I always RSVP whether we are going or not and no matter how busy we are or not.

I've tried everything to get people to RSVP. I've also tried "Regrets only" but that doesn't work cause those are usually the folks that don't want to RSVP.

I've tried guilt trips telling them I absolutely need a head count so I can tell the party place how many are coming. Doesn't work.

I've had people not RSVP and then show up and that is by far the ruddest of all.

I'll be planning my DD's First Communion and will again try to get people to RSVP and this time I will include our email address and hope that helps.

 

[Mkrop]

For my son's 4th birthday, less than 1/2 of the people RSVPed. I always try to, but I've been known to forget. It happens.

Although, for an 11 year old, I'd think that's the age that should be RSVPing themselves? So, maybe their parents expected them to call/tell your daughter and they didn't.

DS10 would be way too clueless unless I literally put the phone in his hand

 

[Mkrop]

Definitely agree with that. I put off RSVPing until I have to usually because my introverted self freaks out about making RSVP calls and then I call at a time where I hope to get voicemail. I'll send out an email immediately and happily.

Not only being an introverted self freak but just even I know myself I dont always want to get caught up in a conversation if I only have a few minutes. I too would rather call and get voicemail somedays or that is why I love email on invites now!

 

[tmarquez]

Ah yes...we go through this every year. I think it's rude not to RSVP. It was a nightmare last year with DD's birthday, nobody RSVP'd. We thought nobody was coming. We ended up putting a note in each kids family file basically begging the parents to let us know if they were coming and how many (siblings and parents were invited too). Basically everyone we invited showed up...they were just not planning on RSVPing at all?!

This year we gave 3 options. We gave our phone #, our e-mail address, and made little tear-offs with "Yes" or "No" that they could rip off and put back in our family file at school.

Invitations went out on Tuesday and so far I got 1 phone call and 2 tear-offs returned...better than last year!

 

[kldmom2000]

It makes me insane.... happens to us all the time

I did LOVE a clever way one of my DD's classmates' parents handled her bday party last week though! I will use it myself! They sent out an invite for a Halloween themed bday (for 7/8 yr olds) to be held Sat. Oct. 20th. They said to RSVP by Oct. 18th to find out WHERE it was going to be held.... this forced the guest to have to call to find out where it would be (it ended up being at a karate studio owned by their friend that they transformed into a "dance-hall" for the night) They told me the night of the party that it worked like a charm

 

[SunKat]

People not RSVP'ing is one of my pet peeves. My DD had her 11th b'day party this past August. We invited 16 kids. I think we had ONE person who actually called by the RSVP date. When my DD receives an invitation to a party I always call before the RSVP deadline. When someone is kind enough to invite your child to a party, please be kind enough to RSVP. To ignore an invitation or call at the last minute is just rude.

 

[pixiewings71]

We always RSVP to invites, most of my girls friends do to but occasionally you get the one kid who didn't and still shows up. I'm sorry, I'm sure this is frustrating for you, I would probably sit my kid(s) down and have them call their friends with you sitting there, that way you know if they are coming or not.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

I always RSVP because it is rude not to do so. I have had the same problem with DD9's birthday party. It was aggravating.
More so was when I got remarried a while back...there were a few people that didn't send in the response card even though it was already stamped to make it easier for them.
What made me even more irritated was people that said they were coming and then didn't show up...at a wedding!!!!