You could compromise. Don't make ADR's for the first 2 nights you are there but do make them for the rest of the days. If fly by the seat of your pants works for those first couple days you can dump the other ADR's before the fees kick in and wing it each day. But if it doesn't go well at first, you can at least eat what / when you want for the balance of the trip. The challenge would be for either of you to keep from saying "I told you so" !