Do you have your kids call non-family "aunt" and "uncle"

[MushyMushy]

I think you're taking it too personally.

My friends and I don't do that, but some of the kids call us "mom" Talk about a close biological tie! My friends and I did that growing up too -- we called almost all of the friends' parents mom or dad. The parents LOVED it, and it tickles us to see our kids doing that now.

 

[TerriP]

We have some very dear friends whose three daughters call me Aunt Terri. They do not, however, call my husband "Uncle Mike"....they call him by his first and last name. Their mom thinks it's becasue they already have an "Uncle Mike". But it cracks us all up when we show up at their house and they run out saying "Aunt Terri...Mike Smith" (not our real name, but you get the point)! It's so funny!

 

[NMAmy]

I've been an auntie since I was 12 and no, it doesn't bother me if my nieces and nephews call someone else "auntie." It doesn't take anything away from the relationship that I have with them. When I was young, we did have friends of the family and distant relations that we called Aunt or Uncle.

What I find odd is that in DH's family, the kids refer to their uncles and aunts by their first names. DH has one niece who has been to stay with us who calls us Aunt & Uncle but the other 7 kids just call us by our first names. They are all adults now but it still seems weird to me.

 

[lspst8]

My parents had close friends who were much older than they were, so we called the wife "Grandma Linda" and the husband "Big Jim". I'm 30 years old and still call them by those names.

My dad's mother passed away before I was born, and, eventhough my grandfather remarried when I was a baby, we always called the family friend Grandma. She told our parents that she would always act like our grandmother --- my grandfather remarreid when I was a baby, but his wife never seemed like a "real" grandparent to us. Grandma Linda was much better at it.

 

[ProudMomTo3Boys]

Yes there are a few. Some are friends, some are cousins. I have a cousin who is like a sister to me and my kids call her Aunt. I am also called Aunt by kids who aren't technically my neice or nephew.

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

My mom had a best friend growing up who is still one of her best friends. Her husband is my godfather. I do call them Aunt Margaret and Uncle Rudy and the best friend was the one who started that.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

Some of my favorite "aunts" and "uncles" since I was a kid were not related. Same with my kids' "aunts" and "uncles".

 

[luvmarypoppins]

My kids call 2 of dh's friends uncle.
Since we both have no living siblings its ok. I call my moms best friend aunt. My real aunt, sadly, does not speak to our family.
If my sister was alive today, I really wouldnt have my ds calling any of my girlfriends Aunt.

 

[Deb in IA]

That's perfectly understandable. Wondering if anyone has family that IS involved in the kids life but still calls friends aunt and uncle.

Yes, many.

DH is one of 6 children, and I have 1 sister. So our kids have 6 biological aunts and uncles.

In addition, we have many longtime friends, some from our elementary school days. These people are called "aunt" and "uncle" by our kids.

In many cultures this is traditional, including the Chinese culture, which is my background. My parents immigrated (legally) from Shanghai, and settled in the Louisville area. I never knew many of my biological aunts and uncles, as many of them were in China or went to other countries. So the 5 or 6 Chinese families we grew up with became very close, and they were all my aunts and uncles. I think it is a very nice tradition.

 

[hildasmuriel]

What I find odd is that in DH's family, the kids refer to their uncles and aunts by their first names. DH has one niece who has been to stay with us who calls us Aunt & Uncle but the other 7 kids just call us by our first names. They are all adults now but it still seems weird to me.

We have always called aunts and uncles by their first names in my family. My children don't call anyone Aunt or Uncle and the only person who calls me Auntie is the daughter of a friend who is not really a niece.

 

[NMAmy]

We have always called aunts and uncles by their first names in my family. My children don't call anyone Aunt or Uncle and the only person who calls me Auntie is the daughter of a friend who is not really a niece.

Perhaps you're one of my relations. DH's family all live in the UK.

 

[ericamanda01]

I always believed that families are not born but made, you don't have to be a relative to be family. That said, several of my friends kids call me Aunt.

 

[Buckalew11]

Always called my godparents (who weren't married to each other) Aunt and Uncle. No one else though.

I don't do it with my daughter. Everyone here just goes by their first name. But if that wasn't the way it was here, we'd do it, I'm sure. My daughter has so many friends whom she is very close with. She is so blessed. If we did do it, I'd be sad that my sisters got miffed about it.

My vote is just to be happy that your niece and nephew are blessed to have loving people in their lives.

 

[disykat]

My kids have grown up with a large loving group of friends nearby and a pretty small biological family that lives far away. To me, part of fostering my kid's special relationship with family despite the distance was special names for them. We have never called friends by family names for this reason, no matter how close they are.

 

[englishteacha]

I have 22 biological nieces and nephews. Some are my age and older, and they don't call me aunt, but the younger ones do. I also have some close friends whose children call me aunt. I'm fine with it either way. I had a few aunts and uncles who weren't actually related to me when I was a child. I didn't realize that my uncle Howie wasn't a relative till I was 14! My Gramma Gloria is not a blood relative but she's still family. My family has a few step-relations in it, but we don't specify. They're just nieces or nephews, brothers or sisters, and the littlest ones (the children of the step-relations) call us all aunt or uncle, and my mom, the matriarch of the family, is grammie to every one.

Some of my mom's friends from church, ladies in their 70s and 80s, I call by their first and last name together. I joined the women's group when I was in high school but I didn't feel comfortable addressing these ladies by their first names, but "Mrs." didn't fit either. So they became "Nancy Smith" and "Mary Jones" when I addressed them by name. It stuck and has become a term of endearment in itself.

 

[nikkistevej]

I always believed that families are not born but made, you don't have to be a relative to be family. That said, several of my friends kids call me Aunt.

ITA- I also have several kids not in the family that aren't my nieces and nephews, that call me aunt and my DD calls my 2 best friends them aunt.

 

[TinkerbEllnor]

yes, mine do.

Personally, I dislike hearing my kids call any adult by their first name only. (The only thing worse imo is calling them "Sally's Mom" directly, but that's another thread.) I try to encourage them to use Mr or Mrs Lastname, but for some close friends that is just too formal and has evolved to Aunt or Uncle Firstname.

If there was another option somewhere between Mr/Mrs and first name basis that could convey both closeness and respect, we'd probably use that instead, but I can't think of any such title. They do use Miss Firstname or Coach Firstname for activites etc and that's okay, I just cringe when I hear only the first name. Feels disrespectful of their elders, even if the adult requested to be called that in the first place.

 

[monkey68]

We have always called aunts and uncles by their first names in my family. My children don't call anyone Aunt or Uncle and the only person who calls me Auntie is the daughter of a friend who is not really a niece.

I only have 1 real aunt and 1 real uncle, but I don't see much of them since they leave in another country, a 12 hour plane ride away. But I never call them Aunt and Uncle... just their first names. My cousins call my parents by their first names too. We actually have very close family friends, families that my family has been friends with for over 70 years (obviously, the friendship started with the older generations). We've gone on vacations together, they changed my diapers when I was a baby, they've taken me on trips with them, all that stuff. I also call them by their first names, but when I'm referring to them, I call them my aunt and uncle, because really, that's what they are.

I also have a couple friends that I have been friends with for ages. I have no doubt that when they have kids, I will be Aunt Monkey. One of my friends and I have already made a pact, that we can be the mean moms to our own kids, but the cool auntie to each other's kids

 

[WDWorBUST]

I still call my childhood best friend's mom Mrs. Edwards and I'm 35 years old now. However, I agree it is overly formal. I have DD call our friends Miss or Mr. first name. It shows respect but isn't formal.

 

[moon]

My aunt and uncle had friends that were "so close" to them that their kids starting calling them "aunt and uncle" they did a lot of fun things together, like going out to the movies or to dinner, so in that sense the kids were closer to the "aunt and uncle" than to my mom, their real aunt.

Once my aunt and uncle had to leave town in a hurry because of a medical emergency with their younger child. They were with her in a hospital far away for about three weeks. The rest of my cousins they stayed with their grandmother, who lived with them. Guess who was watching over the kids, cheking on them, visiting every night making sure they were OK and had everything they needed? My mom. "Aunt and Uncle" never, not once checked on them or visited them during that time. They were "busy"

But I'm sure my cousins remeber "Aunt and Uncle" being as close, or even closer to them than my mom. After all they were a lot of fun to be around.

Not saying that this is the case with anyone here who had non-releated aunts and uncles, just sharing one experience with that type of relationship, and that sometimes the love of a real aunt can't be duplicated.