DH got mad - **UPDATE pg 3**

[Belle0101]

About us: DH is in sales and a slow week to him is 50 hours so I've always been the one to deal with the finances, make docors appts., grocery shopping and the likes. I've been a stay at home mom since 1998 and don't have any earned income. My paychecks are priceless - sticky kisses, riding the bikes with the kids, playing chalk in the driveway. His checks are direct deposited into our joint checking.

I think when I finally got around to whining enough about him needing to see our finances he went into shock. They aren't bad, I just don't think fully he realized how much "stuff" costs - phone, gas, electric, mortgage, eating out, dog food, school supplies ... It all adds up. And really, he's a good husband and father, like I said I just think he got a huge wake-up call and really overreacted.

Good news is, he calmed down and is going to sit down with me once a week and look over the finances and said he'd be more frugal. I about fell over at that! He realized how much coffee and lunches were costing by the end of the week instead of looking at it as a daily expense.

As for Disney - we're still going!! He's going to help me plan it even!! Usually I just plan out the whole thing but this way he's seeing how much it cost and I also feel like we're going to be doing and seeing some of the things that are important to him too. Just as an example, he wanted to just rent a stoller for the trip. Um, dear, that will cost about $50 or we can take our stroller and it will be free. Little things really add up and I jsut think he wasn't seeing that before.

Thanks for all your great advice too. I think letting him cool off was a great start. And communication is key also. Even though we've been married for nearly 8 years I can't read his mind and he can't read mine. So we're squared away, back on track, everything's fine and we're all to see the Mouse with a few adjustments to our budget.

Thanks again everybody!!

 

[Amirah95]

Cool!!!!!!!!!! I knew it could be worked out! ^5! Have fun on your trip!!!

 

[Shelle&Dave]

Awesome!

I'm so happy for you.

My DF really doesn't know what our bills are either. Sometimes he acts interested and other times it's like he thinks the bills magically get paid somehow.

You're going to Walt Disney World!!

 

[1MegMeg]

Yay! So glad to hear that everything worked out and that you are still coming down to see the Mouser.

As a newlywed (just got married in June), I am definitely starting to learn and appreciate the fine art of communication, especially as it relates to finances.

 

[LisaZoe]

Great news that you are going and even better that he's getting more involved in budgeting. I'm single so I have to worry about where the money goes and it's still much too easy to lose track if you don't look at the totals rather than just the daily amount spent on some recurring things, such as lunch out, coffee, etc. Even then, it's sometimes hard to keep that larger total in mind when I really need a mochafrapaliciouschino.

 

[dtuleya]

Michelle - Glad to hear you and 'L' worked it out. I knew he was a keeper when I met him!

 

[mad4themouse]

Michelle,
I'm glad you two worked things out. I had a feeling that all you both needed was some time to step away from the situation and sort things out. It looks like you guys found a way to do that. Good luck with your planning!

 

[Goobergal99]

I am so glad your getting to go to disney, I too am very frugal about my money and DF believes that money grows on trees.I always joke with him about me making more then him and still being so frugal LOL!~ I am just glad your getting to go, as for me, we are just counting away the days!

 

[SamSam]

Pixie Dust DOES work! I am the conservative spender/planner in my family and DH is the spender. We joke about; he say's about himself "I'm in charge of spendable and my wife's in charge of payable's". Even though we joke about it; when we went through a period of time where money was really tight I got very serious with him insisted he look at income versus expenses and he tightened his belt ......for awhile.
Glad you're going!