Death and dying...what stage are you in right now?

[Mackey Mouse]

Hugs CharleyAnn.....I am so sorry to read about your loss.

 

[Sugarfoot]

I think it's different for everyone, so it's hard to really give advice.

My Dad passed away a few months ago, he had suffered from dementia for several years and had been in a nursing home the last few months of his life. It was so hard to see him go from an active, fun-loving and wonderful Dad to a gray-haired old man who walked with a slow shuffle and couldn't remember much of anything.

The one thing we were spared was him not knowing who we were, thankfully that never happened. Oh, he might not have known my name, but he knew I was his daughter.

The funeral was difficult as I don't really believe in them, but of course went to all of the visitations and the funeral to be supportive of my mother.

Time has begun to heal my heart. I can now think of him without crying, although Father's Day was difficult. I can go to his grave and not cry. I wouldn't want him back the way he was, he had no real life, but I do miss him, and always will.

It will take time, more time for some than others.

 

[Eventer98]

My mom passed away 4 years ago after a quick battle with cancer. She went in for a routine Xray on her leg and they found it in 3 spots. It was hard b/c, being the oldest, I had to pick up my dad and keep him going through his depression. I didn't have time to grieve so to this day I have rough patches. Especially since my son was born..all she wanted was grandkids and she didn't live to see them. I also have a hard time at Disney some days..she would have loved Disney but she was gone before we "discovered" our 2nd home.

It does get easier but I won't lie and say it happens quickly. Major holidays are going to be tough..they still are for me. I just cling to my husband and we get through it. Memories help me move fwd. Photos are another big help although they were hard to look at for awhile.

You can make it through this...I know you think it won't even stop hurting. I know how angry and jealous you are. I used to look at other people with their moms (DH!) and have intense jealousy that they still had them and didn't seem to appreciate it.

My thoughts are with you.