closed casket/open casket

[rt2dz]

other. DH & I both want to be cremated. Why rot slowly?

 

[Chicago526]

I want to be cremated, the idea of being buried in a box for all eternity and becomeing worm food just isn't all that appealing.

 

[chell]

Is it only around here where we still have a viewing/visitation if the person is to be cremated?

For me it depends on the state of my body at the time. If I look terrible I don't want my family to have to see me like that unless they choose to do so. For me, I needed for Junior's casket to be open for his funeral because people needed to see it really was him and not some cruel joke. I think in t he case where someone dies unexpectedly an open casket does help with closure.

 

[Martha7]

Someone told me that the tradition of having an open casket was a Southern thing. Has anyone else heard this?

 

[Miss Jasmine]

I voted other because I want to be cremated, and along with that, I would like NO VIEWING. I don't want to be looked at or touched.

I have an aversion to open caskets. Seeing my dad in one when I was younger did me in. When my grandfather passed away I specifically took a late flight so I would miss the viewing. Wouldn't you know my family asked the funeral home to stay open late for me and they did?

 

[MAKmom]

I'll be cremated. And it won't be preceded by a viewing in a casket, either. To me, that just seems like a pointless expense.

And before you jump to conclusions that my survivors would want to find closure by putting me in a casket and saying goodbye to my body, I assure you that is highly unlikely.

There hasn't been a casket funeral in my family for 3 generations. Going back to my great-grandparents (all sides) it's been cremations. If a relative chose casket, we'd all be fine with it, but he or she would definitely be in the minority.

Don't they put you in a casket anyway when they cremate you? You have to pay for it anyway its part of the deal.

 

[Sparx]

eh. either. I'm really not going to be around to mind. I think it helps to have an open one though. (if at all possible, I've seen some magicians who evidently are now mortitans, but sometimes they just can't fix everything.)

 

[ChrisnSteph]

Closed! I had both of my children's caskets closed as well, though some family members thought we should have them open. I want the last image my family to have of me to be different than that of me laying dead in a box. If people feel they need to see me to say good-bye, stand next to my casket and look at a picture!

 

[Am_I_There_Yet]

The last thing I want is for people to be looking at me saying, "Wow. She looks so good.".

This girl's last party will be spent inside a sealed box.

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

Other

I picked cremation - no one is going to be taking pics of my dead body, & I don't want that to be their last memory of me, either.

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

Don't they put you in a casket anyway when they cremate you? You have to pay for it anyway its part of the deal.

We just said goodbye to my dad in November, and did not have a casket. We were asked if we wanted one, and we said no. We did not have to pay for one.

 

[PattnFmly]

Here, you are free to have a wake/viewing and/or a service at the funeral home even if you are being cremated. You just don't go to the gravesite afterwards. When my friend's mom passed, we had a wake and a service and then about a week later there was a small, family only service at gravesite to bury the ashes. And I personally don't think that people remember the casket view of a person in any morbid way, just as being one of the many memories of that person. Just because I saw my grandparents in their casket is not what I remember or dwell on. I remember and see all the good times as well, kind of like a vibrant collage in my mind (instead of on a placard at a service). The casket is just one of the many memories, and it is a poignant reminder that we all die sometime and go on to a better life. It just completes the circle of life. Nothing eerie or gross, just life and death. As it was and always will be.

 

[Zandy595]

Unfortunately what I remember most about my grandfather is how scared and freaked out I was to see him in his casket. I don't want anyone to remember me that way, especially children. With my mom's parents there was no viewing and when I think of them I think of the great times we had together.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

Unfortunately what I remember most about my grandfather is how scared and freaked out I was to see him in his casket. I don't want anyone to remember me that way, especially children. With my mom's parents there was no viewing and when I think of them I think of the great times we had together.

That's exactly how I was with my dad. My initial reaction was to run to the bathroom and throw up. I don't want to put anyone through that.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

Don't they put you in a casket anyway when they cremate you? You have to pay for it anyway its part of the deal.

Not at all. All that is usually required by most states is an alternative container constructed of wood or cardboard, which is cremated with the body. In some states, no conatiner is required. Most funeral homes will rent a casket for a viewing, if desired.

 

[Jynohn]

My DH already has his marching orders if something was to happen to me. He is give away any viable organ and then have me cremated. After the cremation though, I have been trying to convince him to make me into a blue diamond. So far I haven't had any luck.

I gave my DH the exact same instructions. He asked me if it was ok to give the diamond to his new girlfriend though!

 

[DawnCt1]

My mother was the youngest of four sisters and two brothers so I have a cousin who is 73. Two years ago she had a face lift and all new veneers on her teeth. She looks 25 years younger than her age. In addition she is in good physical condition, exercises, walks, etc. She said that when they "lay her out, she wants to be grinning from ear to ear ....so she can get her money's worth out of her new teeth and won't have any crows feet besides.

 

[Servants of Evan]

She said that when they "lay her out, she wants to be grinning from ear to ear ....so she can get her money's worth out of her new teeth and won't have any crows feet besides.

Too darn funny.

I'm going to fish food so I don't care... Folowing my own personal BBQ, and after what's left of me is sealed safely in my ziplock baggie, I'm supposed to head off to Hawaii where the remaining family will have an afternoon on "my beach" in my honor. At the end of the day, they're to wade out into the water, TURN THEIR BACKS TO THE WIND (can't emphasise that point strongly enough), and cast me to the waters.

 

[KelNottAt]

Don't they put you in a casket anyway when they cremate you? You have to pay for it anyway its part of the deal.

I think they cremate you in a casket IF a casket was used in an earlier "stage" of your funeral arrangements, such as at a viewing or in the religious service.

But, since I plan on going straight from my deathbed to the crematorium, there will be no money wasted on putting a casket in the fire for me.

AFAIK, it's certainly not a requirement of the cremation process.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

Cremation...no viewing, no casket.