Chivalry please-a vent

[Tara922c]

Back in the good old days when that happened women weren't allowed to vote and were considered second class citizens. Now they're being treated as equals. I think it's horrible she was pushed away from her child and that should not have happened. However, you can't go onto a bus with this sense of false entitlement to being given priority. If you feel so strongly about sitting, rent a car.

I know that you can not get on a Disney bus thinking that someone MUST give up their seat for you because you have a kid. This is one of the reason why we are not planning on using Disney transpertation. I have always been taught that you open doors for people, give up a seat for people, and things of that nature. I do not think that anyone should HAVE to give up their seat on the bus, I do think it is a nice thing to do if you do not need to sit, to give up your seat for someone who looks like they could, like a person holding on to a 2 year old. Oh, and I was using the "good old day" as an expression. Today people don't even pass off the swinging glass door to the person walking behind them.

 

[Amy&Dan]

That's just it though...she put herself & her children in that position. My children never, ever even rode a WDW bus at that age. In fact, at 11yo & 14yo, that is one reason that we still drive to the parks....so that we won't be in that predicament.

Okay, your theory and standpoint is sound to a point. But I think you're kinda reaching. Yes, the OP put her children in this position. A mother who is on plane that is plummeting to earth about to crash put her children on that plane. Does that make her bad too? I mean this could go on and on.

To me its simple. You ride public transportation, yes you have to take the bad with the good. But a little common courtesy always goes a long way. I really think that is all the OP and many more of us were saying

We can debate life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, personal responsiblity and equal rights for men and women all day long. But in the end, I always just feel like don't look too deeply at the simple things of life, just do something nice and helpful and who knows, it might come back to you later!


And be careful, not ever taking your kids on public transportation sometimes might open you up to criticisims that you care only about them and not the environment! A philosophy professor could probably get a whole semester's worth of lectures on this thread.

 

[CoachBagFanatic]

My guideline has always been that if I think someone needs my seat more than I do, I will offer it to them.

This thread has sealed the deal, though, that I will be driving my van to the parks this trip even though we are staying on property. I will have my 2 kids by myself while my husband is in conferences, and I can't afford to get separated from my 2 1/2 year old!

I hear ya. I can tell you this that if I ever got "pushed away" from my son, the bus would have been emptied by the time I was done. Then there would have been plenty of seats.

 

[Myhappythought5]

My goodness people!!! The OP was not talking about the 1% of the bus riders with a hidden disability. She's talking about the other 99% of the people that have seem to have lost their manners. My DH & friends were just talking about so many people having a "me me me" complex and this is a perfect example. It's frustrating trying to teach my children to be kind to others and be polite when able bodied adults don't even make an attempt.

This is they way I feel. We all know that there are people with issues. I have no problem giving up my seat when my child isn't sleeping and I have to hold them. We double them up and help make room for others. This is the way I was raised and I raise my children. My husband won't sit until he knows everyone who needs a seat has one. I understand that people have issues. But not all of them.

 

[OandA]

good grief... whatever happened to common sense?! A woman standing, holding a child is a safety hazard, not only to themselves, but those around them. Don't know about you, but I don't want someone and their kid falling on me...so I'd give up my seat. I grew up in England and not got used to the north american bussing - over there, 4 or 5 people are allowed to stand in the aisle - if that happens, they won't pick up any more people.

And I don't care what anyone says...it's a sad, sad world where people are more concerned about their own rights - oh, not serious Human Rights issues, like the right to vote....but a "I was here first!" mentality. To the point that 99% of people would sit and watch a woman fall over with a child in their arms before getting off their butts.

What is a sad world is when people are chewed out because they sat in the seat they rightfully are allowed to sit in. The only case I'd agree with the OP is if it was the last bus of the day. You made my point by saying this woman created a safety hazard by standing on the bus with a child in her arms when she could have simply waited for the next bus and taken a seat there where she wouldn't have put other innocent people and her child in danger.

 

[DaisyD]

I think it is pretty scare to load kids on a bus that doesn't have a seat for them. I certainly wouldn't take my little kids on the bus that they couldn't safely seat while moving. That is dangerous. Not only for the kids but also to the people around them.

 

[Howdy Doodat]

But Pirate, Your daughter is YOUR responsiblity. why do I have to give up my seat because you can't control her or guarantee her safety. You saw the bus was crowded did you not. why didn't your daughter stand if you were concerned with her safety? You cannot legislate morality!! As ugly as it is, in this country I have the right to be selfish and rude.

(note: not picking on you in particular -- this was just an example of the kind of post i'm replying to, and yours happened to be at the top of this page)

why do you "have to" give up your seat? you don't. of course you don't "have to" -- and yes, of course you have the right to be selfish and rude. but other people have just as much right to call you out on it if they want to.

a lot of people have suggested that someone with small children should wait for the next bus. honest question here -- does that normally guarantee you a seat? aren't some buses going to have people on them when they get to your resort, depending on where you're coming from? i guess what i'm asking is whether there might be circumstances where standing is really the only option.

in any event, the decision to wait for the next bus and gauging how safe standing on a bus will be while holding a two year old is not a black and white issue. if i get on a bus holding a sleeping two year old (and i have to stand), it'll probably be ok. i'll probably be able to hold on and won't fall over. of course, it would be safer if i could sit, but if there's a 95% chance that i'll be fine, do i wait for the next bus and the 100% chance that people are saying comes with it? i'm not sure -- that's for each parent to decide for himself or herself.

but if i'm on a bus holding that two year old, and there's a 95% chance i'll be fine, i'd still hope some able bodied person would be decent enough to give me that 100% chance. would i be "entitled" to it? no. but i think societal norms dictate that i should get it.

 

[Cinderella94]

iI love the buses and everything but the only thing I don't like is that people on ECV get on first before people that have been waiting for who knows how long and it is even worse when there whole entire group gets on and some times it is like 10 people with them. Nothing against people who use EVC but it would be better if the got in line like the rest of us.

Oh Lord...I wonder how long this thread will last.

Get ready...have your flame suit?

 

[spider0215]

Have to stick my 2 cents in here, will not be a popular response though. I don't drive therefore I rely on public transportation on a daily basis. I agree that seats should be give up for seniors, handicapped persons and a woma "holding a child",4 year olds I don't think so. I don't understand why you and your daughter didn't sit and stand the boys by you. If the bus was as crowded as you say they wouldn't have been able to fall or anything.

 

[Frankiesmom]

good grief... whatever happened to common sense?! A woman standing, holding a child is a safety hazard, not only to themselves, but those around them. Don't know about you, but I don't want someone and their kid falling on me...so I'd give up my seat. I grew up in England and not got used to the north american bussing - over there, 4 or 5 people are allowed to stand in the aisle - if that happens, they won't pick up any more people.

And I don't care what anyone says...it's a sad, sad world where people are more concerned about their own rights - oh, not serious Human Rights issues, like the right to vote....but a "I was here first!" mentality. To the point that 99% of people would sit and watch a woman fall over with a child in their arms before getting off their butts.

Exactly! Sometimes Americans are Pigs-the manners are awful and we seem to have the entitlement mentality more so than anywhere else in this world I have been!

Wow. Just Wow.
I'll still put the needs of a tiny child first. Mom and child can have my seat without a second thought from me.
Call it pixie dust, karma, or just my personal ethics--life's too short for me to just wait and see if a three year old falls on a crowded bus.


This thread has been educational, now I'm backing away.

Your Mama raised you right!

She didn't have to get on the bus though.

Are you for flippin real?

 

[Howdy Doodat]

She didn't have to get on the bus though.

no, that's right. she could still be standing at that bus stop. is that better?

it's a minor inconvenience for someone who can stand (even if they're tired), compared to the larger inconvenience for the person with the sleeping child.

 

[Cinderella94]

Are you for flippin real?

Yes. I put no smiley face or anything to indicate that I was joking. .

 

[Cinderella94]

no, that's right. she could still be standing at that bus stop. is that better?

it's a minor inconvenience for someone who can stand (even if they're tired), compared to the larger inconvenience for the person with the sleeping child.

People keep making the argument that it's more dangerous for her to be standing with a sleeping child on a moving vehicle, so I would think yes, standing at a bus stop is better.

 

[OandA]

(note: not picking on you in particular -- this was just an example of the kind of post i'm replying to, and yours happened to be at the top of this page)

why do you "have to" give up your seat? you don't. of course you don't "have to" -- and yes, of course you have the right to be selfish and rude. but other people have just as much right to call you out on it if they want to.

a lot of people have suggested that someone with small children should wait for the next bus. honest question here -- does that normally guarantee you a seat? aren't some buses going to have people on them when they get to your resort, depending on where you're coming from? i guess what i'm asking is whether there might be circumstances where standing is really the only option.

in any event, the decision to wait for the next bus and gauging how safe standing on a bus will be while holding a two year old is not a black and white issue. if i get on a bus holding a sleeping two year old (and i have to stand), it'll probably be ok. i'll probably be able to hold on and won't fall over. of course, it would be safer if i could sit, but if there's a 95% chance that i'll be fine, do i wait for the next bus and the 100% chance that people are saying comes with it? i'm not sure -- that's for each parent to decide for himself or herself.

but if i'm on a bus holding that two year old, and there's a 95% chance i'll be fine, i'd still hope some able bodied person would be decent enough to give me that 100% chance. would i be "entitled" to it? no. but i think societal norms dictate that i should get it.

So by that same token, anyone who goes on vacation should be called out. Every single person going to Disney World. I mean, there are a lot of people around this world that could use that money to survive and you are going to take it to ride some rides? Why not take all of your disposable income and send it to someone who could use it to live rather than die? It gets old with this "holier than thou" mentality that people have about "the way I was raised" or "the way my sons were raised". Live your life the way you want. Just don't criticize the way others choose to live theirs as long as they live in a way that the law permits.

 

[OandA]

no, that's right. she could still be standing at that bus stop. is that better?

it's a minor inconvenience for someone who can stand (even if they're tired), compared to the larger inconvenience for the person with the sleeping child.

She simply could have let the people behind her get on the bus and been the first in line for the next bus that came minutes later, therefore guaranteeing her a seat if that was so important. When I ride Thunder Mountain I prefer to sit in the very back. Instead of asking others to switch with me, I let the people behind me go ahead of me and ensure I am the first one on the next train.

 

[Howdy Doodat]

So by that same token, anyone who goes on vacation should be called out. Every single person going to Disney World. I mean, there are a lot of people around this world that could use that money to survive and you are going to take it to ride some rides? Why not take all of your disposable income and send it to someone who could use it to live rather than die? It gets old with this "holier than thou" mentality that people have about "the way I was raised" or "the way my sons were raised". Live your life the way you want. Just don't criticize the way others choose to live theirs as long as they live in a way that the law permits.

i don't think it was ever about what was or wasn't legal.

it's about what society dictates that you should or shouldn't do -- what's rude and what isn't, etc.

beyond that, i'm not sure how your post really responds to mine -- care to explain? if not, no big deal.

 

[Cinderella94]

Not worth it.

 

[Frankiesmom]

So by that same token, anyone who goes on vacation should be called out. Every single person going to Disney World. I mean, there are a lot of people around this world that could use that money to survive and you are going to take it to ride some rides? Why not take all of your disposable income and send it to someone who could use it to live rather than die? It gets old with this "holier than thou" mentality that people have about "the way I was raised" or "the way my sons were raised". Live your life the way you want. Just don't criticize the way others choose to live theirs as long as they live in a way that the law permits.

Huh? Was that tirade supposed to make sense?

 

[Cinderella94]

No need to personally attack people. If you have nothing to add to the topic at hand, then no need to post and make things personal. This goes not just to you. I think this is a good topic so I don't want to see it shut down.

Thank you!

 

[Poohbear03]

I am so sorry that happened to you. We all know what it is like to hold a child in our arms when evreyone is so tired. On our last trip my husband and myself gave up our seats to other people that needed them more and yes we were tired too but people need to do the right thing!