Children and teens on the DIS

[dmslush]

(Bold emphasis mine)

I guess I just don't understand this at all. The Gay/Lesbian board is subject to the same rules as the rest of The DIS regarding post content. Teens know that gays and lesbians exist, and they might even find some educational posts about tolerance on the G/L board--I guess I just don't see the connotation here?

There are plenty of teens who contribute intelligent, honest and interesting posts here. As always, I'll use sparx, because I think she's an amazingly mature, humourous and smart young woman. You'd never know she's 14 (15?) unless she told you. I'm sure her mother (who posts here) keeps an eye on her and has discussed appropriate internet behavior (she certainly has raised a wonderful daughter)! I'm not worried about my ds10, yet, as he thinks MBs are for geeks--his own mom included.

It's up to you whether or not you feel this place it appropriate for your child. Obviously some parents do, some don't, and unfortunately, I'm sure others don't monitor their childs' internet usage. Inappropriate stuff will sneak through on occasion, and the mods do the best they can; but if posts are within DIS guidelines, they are going to stay--regardless if your personal sensibilities are offended or not. Name-calling, racism, xenophobia, homophobia, religious intolerance--those are the posts that offend me--luckily I don't see that many. I honestly am not bothered by some animated mooning smilies or the placement of a perfectly valid sub-board.

Thank you for the complements on my dd. I do talk with her about appropriate internet behavior, and have even had to call her down a time or two. I watch what she is viewing online, keep tabs on her. I am going to lose my mind over the big things. Stuff on the dis.. well, she sees worse watching the 6pm news. I figure the kid is 4 years away from being a legal adult, I have to let her start forming real opinions and decisions based on HER perspective, not mine.

As for gays and lesbians, my father was a homosexual, I have no problem with her learning about and accepting alternative lifestyles. I want her to judge a person on how they treat others, how productive they are, how helpful they are, etc.. not on who they have sex with.

 

[luvmydogs]

Dana, you've just described the kind of parenting that has given you such a wonderful girl!

If my ds10 grows up to have half the common sense of your daughter, than I'll be one lucky mom.

 

[disneydude91]

a board for gay and lesbians that is directly below the teen board (nothing wrong with the board I just don't like where it was placed for my teen to find it easily).

Even if it was not placed there she would most likely be apt to find it. I find your concern completely understandable, yet ridiculous. I guarantee you that you will not find a more family friendly community board.

Anything you haven't told her about(drugs , sex , etc.) she has most likely already picked up at school or at friend's houses or somewhere else. I don't think you have anything to worry about with this community board but I understand, your a mom. It is your job to worry!

 

[BrerLizzie]

I'm 17 and I've been posting here since I was like 15.. I don't think it's any different than it was when I first started posting. I've never seen anything on here that I hadn't already heard at school or some place else. This place is much cleaner than school.. or at least my school.

 

[Planogirl]

I hope that I didn't come across as being terribly rude. I do get impatient when people are so critical about something no one can do anything about. And I mean the trollish posts that sit for a while before the mods get a chance to deal with them. There's no way to combat that is there?

As for the G&L Board, OK maybe I came across a little strong. I sometimes see a few friends hurt by comments people make and I tend to be defensive. I'll behave.

Dana, I agree that your comments are great and clearly shows why your daughter is so sensible and mature.

 

[goofygirl]

....board for gay and lesbians that is directly below the teen board (nothing wrong with the board I just don't like where it was placed for my teen to find it easily).

Am I the only one that feels this way????

I am not even gay and I find this statement higly offensive. Where would you like the board then? At the bottom? Top? Off the page all together?

This may come as a shock to you, but your teen child probably knows what gay people are.

If you think "nothing is wrong with the board" then why don't you want your teen to find it? Do you think they are talking about sexual things on that board? Did it ever occur to you that gays want to talk not about sex, but about you know...DISNEY?

 

[slo]

Hey folks, how's tricks?

I tried to read this entire thread, got to page 6 and my eyes were getting a bit buggy from squinting too much. I gotta get a new contact lens prescription.

Anyway, I encourage absolutely ALL of you, gay and straight, to come on by the Gay and Lesbian board. You'll see that there is no hidden agenda. Sure, from time to time, someone has posted a question that does involve an issue that only a person with fear of persecution can truly understand. Best case I can think of is a DIS member who posted that when he and his partner would check into a resort, one would wait in the car, while the other would check in. They were concerned with the reaction they'd receive. Frankly, that post really broke my heart.

I truly think if more heterosexual DIS members were to post words of encouragement to a fellow DIS'er not to worry about things like that, it would be a great, no... huge... no TREMENDOUS help to some member of the g/l community.

That said, please go to the G/L board. It's not a secret, we don't speak in tongue, we don't talk about much more than what's discussed throughout the rest of the DIS. From time to time, we do discuss things that are g/l specific, but how one sided would it be if we didn't have input from the rest of the community? Boring if you ask me.

Join us. Not "join us" muttered in a cultish way, with whispered chanting in the background. Join us and see what we're up to. Heck, we do it to you guys all the time! LOL!

Very nicely said Rick!!!

Congrats again about becoming a moderator - your title is well deserved!!!

 

[JoyG]

I don't believe most of the dis is inappropriate but the CB hardly acts like a community. There is a gang mentality to overrun posts that don't reflect the popular or PC opinion by either humiliating the OP, or ignoring and changing the post into a whole other subject. It happens over and over and over.

I totally agree with the above. This happens over and over again in topics on religion, politics, homeschooling, sexuality... etc.

To answer the OP's question...you're not alone. I view the boards and the community board in particular, as adult/mature content. I would not want my young teens to participate in it. Not just the fact they might read content that I find inappropriate, but that they might also contribute their opinions to a topic and become unwittingly the victim of a gang of flames.

First time it happened to me I had a very hard time not taking it personally. You sometimes forget these are strangers that have no problem saying something online that they would never dream of saying in person.

I would probably say the Trip Planning forums are ok for all readers, but even then, the first time I was flamed it was in a 13+ page thread on the Theme Park Strategies board.

 

[goofysk8]

Wow, the OPs topic really went astray. WHat happened to what she was talking about???

 

[Caradana]

To formalize the obvious: the "flaming" that goes on in the boards has
(1) always existed and
(2) always been an aspect of the boards that I've rather valued, if only because it's more real and honest than what takes place in face-to-face life.

WDWMom, if you stood up in a public place and announced that you were concerned about your daughter's exposure to lesbian themes, due to the fact that there's a mention of the word "lesbian" within eyesight of your daughter's Disney World Board link, I think most of the people surrounding you would laugh behind your back. Here, people are telling you exactly what they think. The internet knocks down a lot of hurdles in communication. Look at the bright side. She's reading a Disney board. She's proactively reading about perhaps the most wholesome place in the world.

There are actually two real concerns you'd be justified in having at this point:
- There's now a thread that tears her mother's logic to shreds, and your daughter will probably want to search for your posts when she visits, and
- In terms of "avoiding conversations you don't want to have," your tag says something about an affair and a cocktail recipe. The cocktail does sound tasty, but no doubt you'll have to be explaining that one to your 14 yo.

 

[JoyG]

To formalize the obvious: the "flaming" that goes on in the boards has
(1) always existed and
(2) always been an aspect of the boards that I've rather valued, if only because it's more real and honest than what takes place in face-to-face life.

I agree it's always existed.
I'm glad you find it refreshing.
Do you think a 14 year old is old enough to handle it? Just curious as to your opinion.

Joy

 

[NMAmy]

Join us. Not "join us" muttered in a cultish way, with whispered chanting in the background. Join us and see what we're up to. Heck, we do it to you guys all the time! LOL!

Oh, heavens, Rick, you made Diet Pepsi come out my nose this morning.

I've been meaning to stop by the g/l boards--mainly because I miss your stories and I'm hoping they are being posted there. Congrats on becoming a mod!

 

[Stacerita]

and become unwittingly the victim of a gang of flames.

Sorry, but this had me cracking up.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

I wish my 14 DD would go on DIS compared to some other websites that are available to kids her age. As far as the G & L board there is nothing that she hasn't seen or heard from school!

 

[azgal81]

The DIS boards are calm compared to some other websites and message boards out there. If you have as problem with what your teen can see on the web then restrict the access it's that simple. As far as the G/L board being where it is located um I'm sure your teens would find that board even if it's not located right above the teen board it's called the front page of the board and seeing all the forums out there. To those who have a problem with the board get over it the forum deserves to be there just as much as the other ones. The people are real people and they deserve a place to chat. I have no problem with their lifestyle I would rather spend my time accepting others then being negative. Being negative is a waste of valuable time.

 

[disney4us2002]

Nope, I'd say it's pretty awful. Ranks right up there with racial prejudice.

Thank you for being honest, though.

It would be helpful if bigots had to tatoo their prejudices on their foreheads so the rest of us would know where they stand. (not that you're a bigot)

Please explain why this isn't a personal attack - not that I'm accusing you Marseeya. (That is, afterall, how we disclaim responsibility, right?)

Dana, Cara, or whatever you go by, perhaps in your environment, people would laugh at a parent who expresses concern with homosexual issues discussed with her teen, but here, this is a touchy subject and as yet has been rejected to be taught in "family life" as an alternate lifestyle.

 

[bettyann29]

I couldnt agree more that the dis board is teenager friendly.. every now and then you might see a post that is questionable, but if it way out there it will get closed.. and that has nothing to do with any certain board on here.. but that doesnt happen very often.. I have a DD14 and I would have no problem with her being on this site or even looking at the gay/lesbian link.. My brother is gay and I have no problems with anyone that is gay or lesbian. My children know and have no problems talking about it openly and they shouldnt.. Just because someone is different doesnt mean there is something wrong with them, and most likely your children are already exposed to this at school or will be in the coming years.. When I was in school you never knew if anyone was gay/lesbian and actually my brother hid it for many years because it wasnt widely accepted back then, but my boyfriends children who are in high school now have mentioned before that there are teens at their school who are open about this, so its not something that your kids may not already be or will be presented with in the future.. Its part of life and I think its important for our children to learn that there is more than just one particular lifestyle.. I mean thats life.. From time to time I check out the gay/lesbian board just because I view it as any other forum on this board and I havent seen anything I have a problem with.. actually I love reading some of the posts as they are quite funny.. Maybe you should check it out some time and broaden your horizons..

 

[dmslush]

Please explain why this isn't a personal attack - not that I'm accusing you Marseeya. (That is, afterall, how we disclaim responsibility, right?)

Dana, Cara, or whatever you go by, perhaps in your environment, people would laugh at a parent who expresses concern with homosexual issues discussed with her teen, but here, this is a touchy subject and as yet has been rejected to be taught in "family life" as an alternate lifestyle.

Carla,

I'm not sure if you are referring to me or not.. first off, I am NOT danacara. I think she is a rather young woman in her 20's maybe. I'm an old hag in her 30's

I would never laugh at any parent who expresses concern with homosexual isuses. I was simply stating that I PERSONALLY as the parent of MY child, do not share those issues. Nor would I condone anyone in my presence laughing at said parent. I would, however, feel quite sorry for the possible homosexual teen of parents who chose not to discuss alternative lifestyles.

 

[disney4us2002]

Carla,

I'm not sure if you are referring to me or not.. first off, I am NOT danacara. I think she is a rather young woman in her 20's maybe. I'm an old hag in her 30's

I would never laugh at any parent who expresses concern with homosexual isuses. I was simply stating that I PERSONALLY as the parent of MY child, do not share those issues. Nor would I condone anyone in my presence laughing at said parent. I would, however, feel quite sorry for the possible homosexual teen of parents who chose not to discuss alternative lifestyles.

No, I was referring to the other Dana/Cara, etc. I don't know her name as she was first one then switched it around and I was disagreeing with her post #160. There is a world of difference between your posts and hers. Sorry, I wasn't clearer. I don't know how to quote two different posts.

 

[KathyTX]

For the record here, we have zero tolerance for hate speech. You're not going to find support or a forum for anti-gay rhetoric, racial prejudice, or any other form of hate.

Truly, anyone who feels so uncomfortable with the Gay/Lesbian Forum that they don't want their kids to read the DISboards or who feels compelled to speak out against "them" probably won't be really happy here....