Moving day!
Today we depart France for Germany.
Well they're moving on up,
moving on up.
To that deluxe apartment, in the skyyyy.
Well moving on up,
Moving on up,
Ponzi wants to bid Paris Goodbye.
We have a noon train to catch from the North train station (Gare du Nord).
Heard those trains are pretty fast. I hope you're well rested to run after it to catch it.
And thus began our descent into hell.
You know, its never to late to change your ways.
One heavy suitcase...
No, wait... That doesn't look right.
One HEAVY suitcase.
I take it the suitcase was heavy?
My lightweight suitcase and carrion were fine.
It's whats inside them that made them heavy right?
When we got to the metro station, after struggling through the gates, we were confronted with our first set of stairs.
Going down I hope. "Elle. I'm going to put this bag on it's side and just on the end of the stairs. Hold on to it until I get to the bottom, then let go and it will slide all the way down and I'll catch it."
As Ponzi is running down the stairs, said luggage goes zooming by him and now he has to try and catch up to it before Elle bowls a strike of 10 people trying to come up.
If it was upstairs, yo siento mucho.
Elle and I would go down the stairs. Ruby and Kay would wait at the top.
I'd leave Elle to guard the two bags.
I'd trudge back up to the top and grab another bag.
Sometimes Ruby and Kay, together, would wrestle the last bag down.
Sometimes I'd bring it down.
My way would've been faster.
We never did see an elevator or escalator that day.
It helps to have your eyes open.
After a metro train had stopped and opened its doors, we boarded.
(Happy now T_Man?)
I still would've just stepped on, but that's me. Hey, if you want to turn into a board, that's totally up to you. As long as you got on the train, that's all that matters.
At Gare du Nord, we all piled out and started looking for the platform where we'd catch our train.
Platform 9 3/4 is that way.
And then we couldn't find the platform!
Well it's right there in front of you. Don't you see it?
We had to catch the Thalys train to Cologne.
You meant the Hogwarts Express to, well you know, Hogwarts of course.
I asked a couple of security guards/cops/military personnel/costumed party goers.....
Did they have robes on? You should've followed them. I bet they were headed to platform 9 3/4 as well.
... where the platform was, and they kindly vaguely motioned up a flight of stairs.
Down the stairs and through that big stone column. Make sure and get a good running start or else you might not make it through.
We were in the right area, we could even see a Thalys train,
but there was no indication if it was our train.
Again, that's because, oh nevermind.....
The Thalys high speed train from Paris to Cologne travels at speeds up to 300 kmh (186 mph) and covers the roughly 500 kms (310 miles) in three hours and fifteen minutes (some stops along the way).
After 15 years in operation, there's only been two accidents.
And you were on board to witness the second one I'm guessing.
Because I had booked well in advance (just like booking CRT meals at Disney!) we got a discount on our tickets. (not like booking CRT meals at Disney!)
Four first class tickets were only slightly more then second class.
Our first class tickets actually saved us money since not only did we get more comfortable seats, but we got a free meal served to us.
You big spender you.
It makes sense, of course.
I mean, first we descend into hell, then we meet Satan.
You got to meet Satan? Wow, what a coincidence. So did I once, only he was in the form of a human. In Las Vegas just this year. This is a true story and stuff like this I can't make up. I don't remember if I mentioned it in our TR or not.
April is my birthday month. Lady H and I try to go to Vegas about once a year. Spend some time by the pool relaxing, visit some of her family out there and just take a mini vacation basically. We went in April to celebrate my birthday of course. We went with my sister, my mom and Lady H's mom. One night, Lady H and I were gambling, having one last drink before calling it a night. Well actually before calling it a day. It was already 12:30 am, so we were already into the next day.
Anyways, before heading to our room for the night, Lady H said she needs the restroom and goes. Like the obedient puppy I am, I wait around for her. While waiting around, I notice this man standing by the box office; which is right next to the restrooms. As I stand around waiting, this man walks up to me. I thought "oh great, this dude is going to ask for money."
"How's it going?" he asks.
"Good. Better if I was winning."
He then asks "Do you come to Vegas often?"
"Not too often. Occasionally to visit family."
Then out of the blue he says "what if I told you I'm the devil and I want you to sock me right now."
"Excuse me." Wow, those drinks I had must have been strong. I could swear he just told me he was the devil.
He say. "Yeah. I'm the devil and I want you to sock me right now."
I tried to keep from laughing and keep calm all the while hoping Lady H comes out soon.
"I ain't going to hit you. I don't even know you. Plus I don't believe in violence. How about I just pray for you?"
"You're going to pray for me? Doesn't that make you a hypocrite?" He says.
"How so?"
"Well you're in Vegas, drinking and gambling. That makes you a sinner."
I tell him, "Well then, while I'm praying for you; I'll be sure to ask God for forgiveness."
Now the dude gets in my face. "I want you to hit me as hard as you can, right now."
My fist is clenching shut and I'm getting ready to throw down and getting ready to give this guy his wish. Believe me, if he starts it I will knock this guy back down to hell where he came from. I tell him once again, "I already told you once, I don't believe in violence."
Not too long after I told him that, I notice casino security walking by. I walk away from the self proclaimed devil and stop the security guard walking by. I tell him the guy is claiming he's the devil and wants me to hit him. Eventually security takes over the situation and deals with him. Soon Lady H comes out of the restroom and I tell her I just met the devil. She gives me a weird look and I tell her the story. And that was my meeting with the devil.
Eventually, Kay mentioned that she had to use the restroom, but wasn't sure where it was.
I went with her to find one.
Starting to sound like my story.
Darn it if I hadn't forgotten about Satan.
You may have forgotten about Satan, but he didnt forget about you.
Suddenly, Satan comes charging out from under the seat, barking and snarling and trying....
Well it's a small dog, so I'm gonna say... trying to gnaw on my ankle.
Ankle biters is what we call them around here.
Still, scared the prac out of me (I 'membered this time, Heather)
Good boy.
After a few hours, we arrive in Cologne, Germany.
Upon exiting the train station, the first thing you see is this
I see you finally figured out how to get onto Platform 9 ¾. That looks like Hogwarts castle to me.
I'll have more to say about the incredible Cologne Cathedral in the next chapter.
Right now we're tired and want to get rid of our bags,
If you wanted to get rid of them, you couldve just left them in Paris. Thats the fast and easy way to get rid of them. Then you wouldnt have been so tired lugging luggage around. Get it. Lugging, luggage. Wow tough crowd tonight.
No teeny tiny euro clown car is going to work.
Right. You need a large euro clown car.
The kids' room
Evil suitcase in bottom right hand corner!!!
Plenty of churches around. Did you ever think about having an exorcism performed to get rid of the demons that possess this evil suitcase?
Our room
Now one quick observation here. Before taking these pictures, did somebody sit on the beds? Or were they like that already when you walked into the room? Cause to me, it looks like somebody was already sleeping in those beds. I would put an apb out for Goldilocks if you walked in and they were already like that.
This is as far as I was able to get for the moment. Ill get to the rest of my comments tomorrow. I know, I know. I dont have to. Believe me, I have more sarcasms, I mean comments I want to post before you move on to the next chapter. By all means, feel free to post the next chapter if I dont get to finish. Ill catch up eventually.
And we love Smidgy too of course. I think elder DD would gladly stay with Smidgy any time. 
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