can of worms here.....yelling in the hallways!

[Starr W.]

How do you know that? Perhaps "Dad" wasn't "Dad" at all - but stepdad and the kid had been (and was continuing to be) victimized by a contentious divorce? Perhaps the kid did have sensory issues. My daughter goes to school with two little girls, both with an entire suite of 'issues' and both with parents who seem - problematic. In one case Mom left when she was four, showed up again when she was five, rehab involved. Mom comes and goes, alternately spoiling her and ignoring her - and Dad is more interested in his girlfriend. That one you CAN - to some extent, blame poor parenting, but since there is also mental illness involved, its more complicated than that. In the other case the little girl's brother died of cancer last year - after a five year long struggle - and the whole family is a dysfuctional mess - with some good reasons.

I'm always amazed at the ability of Disers to be able to be exposed to a family for fifteen minutes in line and be able to be able to identify exactly what has gone wrong within the family unit accurately. We seem to know when its poor parenting and not autism or sensory disorder. We seem to know when a kid is a brat and not that a perfectly normal kid just didn't reach his limit for the day without warning. We apparently are all in the wrong profession, since we'd all make such efficient social workers, school psychologists and family therapists.

, as a parent of an Aspie, and a typical child who just likes to push the limits of my patience at times(aka Matt the Brat at times).

 

[Starr W.]

You go girl!!

What are you doing on here? Shouldn't you be enjoying a pool drink at VWL?

May have something interesting for you on Tuesday. If it's a go you'll

 

[quentina]

I can see if the kids are having a fit and crying and screaming. Sometimes it's hard for the parents to calm down the kids. That is understandable. Sometimes there are kids with disabilities and they might be screaming. That is also understandable.

What I don't understand is if a kid is screaming and yelling in a hallway of a hotel why there are some parents that just don't pay attention OR think it's funny or cute.

Yesterday I was in wal-mart and there was this kid standing in the middle of the aisles just screaming for no reason. Just screaming. The mother didn't pay attention to him but when she did she said "oh you are so silly" and that was it. The kid continued screaming the entire 2 hours I was in Wal-mart. That is what I don't understand.

That being said, usually I have seen some very well behaved children in WDW. Especially after spending the long day in the hot sun. That could make anyone cranky.

As a parent of a screamer...the counselor tells us that the worst thing we can do is acknowledge it....we are to ignore and go about business, no eye contact, no attention, nothing!

If there is a miracle cure...I want it....I just spent the last hours crying to my mom on the phone because we can't get through to our daughter.

The Dr's have wanted to medicate her since she came to live with us and prior when she was with a foster family. I have surrendered...I am calling for an appointment tomorrow.

We were sure that we would be able to help her without meds....I think I would rather her scream than be a zombie.

There is obviously some sort of chemical imbalance going on, hopefully the dr's can help.

 

[BWV Dreamin]

As a parent of a screamer...the counselor tells us that the worst thing we can do is acknowledge it....we are to ignore and go about business, no eye contact, no attention, nothing!

If there is a miracle cure...I want it....I just spent the last hours crying to my mom on the phone because we can't get through to our daughter.

The Dr's have wanted to medicate her since she came to live with us and prior when she was with a foster family. I have surrendered...I am calling for an appointment tomorrow.

We were sure that we would be able to help her without meds....I think I would rather her scream than be a zombie.

There is obviously some sort of chemical imbalance going on, hopefully the dr's can help.

There is plenty of help out there for you......let them help you. Think of it this way...maybe she is screaming for help too. Like everything else, meds are trial and error (I went through this with my ADD son). Once you get the right medication, the right dose, the right therapy, the right doctor, everyone's life will start to turn around. Know that you are not alone ....keep the faith.

 

[quentina]

On the topic of worrying about someone grabbing a child....last year when we were at VWL in a 2 bedroom, my 4 year old mistook the exit door as a bedroom or restroom and walked into the hall. The door locked behind him.

My husband heard the door and thought it was me coming in from the gift shop.

It took him about 30 seconds to realize it was Antonio.

He opened the door and started yelling for him..he had run down the hall by now.

We were very lucky...a couple was walking down the hall, heard my husband screaming and brought my son back towards my hubby.

Now, we have learned many things that trip:

1. Losing a child is bound to end in excessive fighting and threats of divorce.fl2:
2. ALWAYS...even in the daytime..is you have small kids...use that metal locking device that the kids can't reach.
3. There really are nice people to care and look out for others.

We were lucky.....

 

[quentina]

There is plenty of help out there for you......let them help you. Think of it this way...maybe she is screaming for help too. Like everything else, meds are trial and error (I went through this with my ADD son). Once you get the right medication, the right dose, the right therapy, the right doctor, everyone's life will start to turn around. Know that you are not alone ....keep the faith.

Thanks...I needed that...I am an emotional mess tonight. It is amazing, I can cry without trying...tears just keep streaming down my cheeks even though I feel OK (I have been reading the DIS for the past hour).

 

[bobbiwoz]

As a parent of a screamer...the counselor tells us that the worst thing we can do is acknowledge it....we are to ignore and go about business, no eye contact, no attention, nothing!

If there is a miracle cure...I want it....I just spent the last hours crying to my mom on the phone because we can't get through to our daughter.

The Dr's have wanted to medicate her since she came to live with us and prior when she was with a foster family. I have surrendered...I am calling for an appointment tomorrow.

We were sure that we would be able to help her without meds....I think I would rather her scream than be a zombie.

There is obviously some sort of chemical imbalance going on, hopefully the dr's can help.

Best wishes to you!
Bobbi

 

[DVCJones]

I'm going to spend my time worried about higher risk things. How many children run through the hallways of hotels every day around the world and how many of them have been pulled into a hotel room? On the other hand, how many of them have been killed running after a ball into the street, on a bike or skateboard, drown in a pool? How many are injured doing sports? How many of them get beat up or harassed by the bully at school? How many of them end up doing drugs or engaging in unsafe sex? For that matter, how many of them are abused by people they know?

It happens...it all can happen...as parents we can't take steps to prevent what you can and hope for the best. Letting your child run through the halls unsupervised can only increase your chances. You wouldn't leave a young child alone to play in a pool....don't leave them to play in the halls.

 

[BroganMc]

I'm going to spend my time worried about higher risk things. How many children run through the hallways of hotels every day around the world and how many of them have been pulled into a hotel room? On the other hand, how many of them have been killed running after a ball into the street, on a bike or skateboard, drown in a pool? How many are injured doing sports? How many of them get beat up or harassed by the bully at school? How many of them end up doing drugs or engaging in unsafe sex? For that matter, how many of them are abused by people they know?

How about said kids deciding it is "cool" to climb the railings like "real" hallway pirates and plummetting to their demise? Or hopping the elevator and forgetting what floor they're on to get lost somewhere in the resort. Lots of nooks and crannies to discover for a kid and danger to encounter in the maintenance areas.

I'm an old fashioned type. I'm just not comfortable leaving kids under the age of 12 to their own devices. I remember being 9-10 and really stupid. Nearly set the house (and me) on fire cooking hot dogs in the toaster oven; wandering the hallways of my school after closing when I waited for my mom to pick me up after work (those dark and scary maintenance areas are like magnets). Then there came the teen years when being left alone invited the opportunity to experiment with alcohol, drugs and sex. If I wasn't raised Catholic and therefore had a fear of disppointing God I could have gotten into a lot more trouble.

But I do agree, it's easy to judge and hard to understand. I'm a boisterous person and have found my voice carry far more than I expected in a hallway. Even the concrete hallways of SSR. Sometimes you are caught in a bad moment.

The one good thing about SSR is the sound-proofing in the rooms. With the doors closed, you are in a cone of silence. Last month my cousin slept in several days and had the drapes closed as well. At 11am I woke up and thought it was 4am it was so dark and quiet.

 

[maburke]

We seem to know when its poor parenting and not autism or sensory disorder.

Well said. Thanks. I often find myself correcting my kids in public in a conventional way, which I know will do no good at all except to perhaps diffuse the frustration of the adults around me, who will know that I'm trying.

I guess that balances Crystal's approach of talking to her daughter but really telling the other parent that the behavior is unacceptable; I'm talking to my child but really telling the other parents that I KNOW the behavior is unacceptable!

 

[crisi]

It happens...it all can happen...as parents we can't take steps to prevent what you can and hope for the best. Letting your child run through the halls unsupervised can only increase your chances. You wouldn't leave a young child alone to play in a pool....don't leave them to play in the halls.

I didn't say I did. My kids are older now, but I didn't leave them unsupervised in the halls - but not because someone might grab them. Because I needed to make sure they weren't noisy. Small children shouldn't be unsupervised, not because people will grab them (which is a small concern) but because small children have almost no common sense - and will take the elevator without waiting for you with no idea which floor the room is on.

 

[amystevekai&bump]

Well said. Thanks. I often find myself correcting my kids in public in a conventional way, which I know will do no good at all except to perhaps diffuse the frustration of the adults around me, who will know that I'm trying.

I guess that balances Crystal's approach of talking to her daughter but really telling the other parent that the behavior is unacceptable; I'm talking to my child but really telling the other parents that I KNOW the behavior is unacceptable!

This is me too!! I often used to find myself publicly disciplining my son for the benefit of those watching!! (I know that for my son the best way to deal with him is to (where safe) ignore him, but I don't want other adults to think I am condoning his behaviour or that I am a 'bad' parent, so I do 'deal' with it - even though it doesn't really work!!)

 

[Anthony1971]

My 3 year old for the most part behaves very well....
There are times he does not.... do we like it.... no
I have learned:
in some cases to let it pass as picking him up, talking, yelling etc will only make it worse and we will have a crying screaming child.
Cranky they will be sometimes as you can not force a child to sleep
My then 2 1/2 year old can open the top latch.... He will find something to stand on from the closet.
I will never leave my child unattended --I do get preocupied with other things sometimes hopefully for a very brief time and find him doing something he should not which is corrected.
If somone were to correct my parenting skills which has not happened in the 5times he has been to Disney as for the most part he is good I would not get upset but gladly give you him and watch him Kick and spit at you all while yelling louder as 3 year olds do. He will however say he is sorry and hug 2 minutes later without being prompted as he knows it is wrong.
He is well parented but will have fits that and bad moments are sometimes better left alone as they are short lived.
Most posts here seem to be about extremes but some are just Kids being Kids and while some may think they are better parent or just know better than a parent period it may just be the parent of that child know better than you how to corrcet their childs behavior.

 

[kitsch4]

I guess we will have to agree to disagree on this

When observing other's poor actions or parental inaction, yes absolutely that can be an important opportunity for any parent to reinforce with their own child the importance of good behavior etc., however, jmho HOW a parent goes about commenting or discussing another person with their child is teaching that child something too...

I absolutely agree!

 

[DonnaL]

I have to agree with the above poster who states "room farthest from elevator are quieter". We have always found this to be the case also.........I guess it's a tradeoff.......closer to elevator...expect some noise. When we stay at BWV one of our favorite room areas is on the canal side of the hallway which is directly over the old DVC models on the Boardwalk right in back of Jellyrolls........a VERY LONG walk from the elevator, however, probably one of the quietest I've ever stayed at any DVC resort..........I even commented to DH on our last stay about how new the carpeting in that area of the hallway appears....compared to the same carpeting closer to elevators.......sure, the only people walking in that direction are the guests staying there!!!!

 

[wintergreen]

No flames from me!!! I totally agree with you, and I'll even go a step further on the "likely to be flamed" line and say we have attributed the LOUD children (and I mean SHRIEKING) to teh preponderance of day care instead of parenting themselves. At the big day care centers, the best way for a child to learn to get attention is to shriek, and you hear it all the time at Disney. It has been much more apparent in the last 5-10 years. Add to the that the fact that those "parents" no longer have learned how to parent, and you have the situation described. Maybe we can even go a generation farther back too. My generation might be at fault here too. I'm a bit of a rarity, since I stayed home with my kids in a time when most mothers were a making careers as well as being mothers. Now those kids are having kids, and two generations haven't learned how to parent!:

Ok, I usually try to contain myself when I read these kinds of threads, but this is pretty condescending. I'm pretty sure I learned how to be a parent, even if my kids were in daycare. How about the working dads? Did they not learn to be parents, either? Wow!

 

[DVCJones]

Ok, I usually try to contain myself when I read these kinds of threads, but this is pretty condescending. I'm pretty sure I learned how to be a parent, even if my kids were in daycare. How about the working dads? Did they not learn to be parents, either? Wow!

Yeah, I chose to ignore this one too. I didn't even want to go "there."