Bringing boys in the ladies room/family bathroom questions

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Treysar

Mouseketeer
Joined
Oct 17, 2015
I am normally one of “those people” who do do not approve of taking school aged kids into the opposite gender’s bathroom BUT WDW is a different animal (because there are so many people) and I have a lot more tolerance for it and definitely understand if the child is disabled. I have however seen what appeared to be typical boys ( I know you can’t always tell and shouldn’t judge) that could have been 9-10 with their moms in the woman’s bathrooms. I feel this Is pushing it a bit. Personally mine would have fought it tooth and nail by the time they started school and would have been very embarrassed
Thanks for letting me know how embarsssed your typical children would be. That’s really helpful. What is the point of this response?
 

DisneyOma

DIS Veteran
Joined
Jul 27, 2015
Thanks for letting me know how embarsssed your typical children would be. That’s really helpful. What is the point of this response?
Maybe to remind you (and others) that not all children with disabilities have visual disabilities that would lead others to think they are disabled? Also, that children, no matter their disability, may notice that they are in the 'wrong' bathroom (though I do not believe there are wrong bathrooms) and feel embarrassed, even though they may not be able to express it. I've worked with teenagers with disabilities, and they know a lot more about the world than they can sometimes express.
 

tinkerjo

Crazy Disney nut
Joined
Nov 25, 2005
Thanks for letting me know how embarsssed your typical children would be. That’s really helpful. What is the point of this response?
I meant nothing disrespectful about my post. As a nurse that has worked in the school system with special needs Children (with a wide range of disabilities) they are only allowed to use the bathroom that fits their gender and they are taught what is considered appropriate in society ( no matter what we believe as parents) and while I personally do not have issues with you taking your 8 yo in for a diaper change, there may be people that do, especially as he gets older. I have a DS with a medical issue so Please don’t be so quick to judge me. I never said my children were typical but yes he would have been embarrassed so if your son is verbal, I would ask him his feelings about it.
 
  • Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    i have a special needs grandson who at the age of yours would have to be carried fighting you all the way into ladies room. he has been this way since about age 5 or 6 so it is just not "typical" kids
    I would be so happy if my kids had that awareness. They don’t. Obviously, or I would be writing this post.
     

    Betty Rohrer

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    May 19, 2010
    I would be so happy if my kids had that awareness. They don’t. Obviously, or I would be writing this post.
    I would wish it for your kids too. I was bothered by your response to the other poster about typical kids being the only ones who would object to going in Ladies room. what is going to happen when they are teens if they still have these problems? yes I know you are talking about now but what about others that have this problem with older kids who read this. maybe this also helps others
     

    Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    I would wish it for your kids too. I was bothered by your response to the other poster about typical kids being the only ones who would object to going in Ladies room. what is going to happen when they are teens if they still have these problems? yes I know you are talking about now but what about others that have this problem with older kids who read this. maybe this also helps others
    I don’t understand.
     
  • ice cube

    DIS Veteran
    DVC Gold
    Joined
    Nov 28, 2009
    I am normally one of “those people” who do do not approve of taking school aged kids into the opposite gender’s bathroom BUT WDW is a different animal (because there are so many people) and I have a lot more tolerance for it and definitely understand if the child is disabled. I have however seen what appeared to be typical boys ( I know you can’t always tell and shouldn’t judge) that could have been 9-10 with their moms in the woman’s bathrooms. I feel this Is pushing it a bit. Personally mine would have fought it tooth and nail by the time they started school and would have been very embarrassed
    When they were younger my daughters did fight tooth and nail as they made it very clear they weren't going in the men's room...
     

    Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    I meant nothing disrespectful about my post. As a nurse that has worked in the school system with special needs Children (with a wide range of disabilities) they are only allowed to use the bathroom that fits their gender and they are taught what is considered appropriate in society ( no matter what we believe as parents) and while I personally do not have issues with you taking your 8 yo in for a diaper change, there may be people that do, especially as he gets older. I have a DS with a medical issue so Please don’t be so quick to judge me. I never said my children were typical but yes he would have been embarrassed so if your son is verbal, I would ask him his feelings about it.
    I’m sorry, I misunderstood when you said “typical children” that you meant your own, and I didn’t understand why a fellow SPED mom would be insensitive to use that language. I spend a lot of time defending my dudes, I’m always on defense. (Not good!) I’m sorry.
     

    North of Mouse

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Mar 31, 2011
    JMO, but that is why they have family restrooms and first aid, is to deal with families that need to attend their children no matter the age. I have not encountered this situation very many times, but I have felt uncomfortable as there are lots of areas to pass through before entering a private stall.

    The same is true more so in men's bathrooms as many of them have open urinals - not a place I'd want my dd no matter the age.

    Yes, it is all a matter of opinion, so I'll respect yours, and you can respect mine. There are others that are of the same mind as we are.
     

    Betty Rohrer

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    May 19, 2010
    I don’t understand.
    I assume you are not understand about special needs using Ladies room with mom not relating to typical kids which it can and also I feel there comes an age where even special needs kids should not be in bathroom of opposite sex. plus using ages you have on your kids how is your daughter going to feel in a few years when she is going to be heading to bathroom at same time you are taking a brother in with you. in our situation they are all boys in that family older brother let him know that he was to be using other bathroom and younger brother of course he want to be like big brother
     
  • tinkerjo

    Crazy Disney nut
    Joined
    Nov 25, 2005
    I’m sorry, I misunderstood when you said “typical children” that you meant your own, and I didn’t understand why a fellow SPED mom would be insensitive to use that language. I spend a lot of time defending my dudes, I’m always on defense. (Not good!) I’m sorry.
    I don’t see anything with the term typical and I don’t feel like I was insensitive, but it’s not like it’s a term I use on a daily basis. I am sure your kids are wonderful and it’s great that you protect them. Just don’t rush to judgement too quickly. People don’t always mean harm. I used to care for a little girl who had multiple physical and medical issues and people would stare a bit. They felt sorry for her ( and they would say that) I explained that she was like any other little girl (because she was). They were not mean, they just needed informed. Her mother was always quick to judge and would publicly( and very loudly) yell at people. I hope you go to WDW and have a wonderful time with your boys.
     

    Weedy

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jun 2, 2008
    I have never understood (in a women’s restroom) why this is such a big deal. All the stalls have a door and even if someone can see slightly through the crack in the door your crack is facing the other way.
     

    Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    I assume you are not understand about special needs using Ladies room with mom not relating to typical kids which it can and also I feel there comes an age where even special needs kids should not be in bathroom of opposite sex. plus using ages you have on your kids how is your daughter going to feel in a few years when she is going to be heading to bathroom at same time you are taking a brother in with you. in our situation they are all boys in that family older brother let him know that he was to be using other bathroom and younger brother of course he want to be like big brother
    They will always be with with me in the ladies room if there aren’t family bathrooms. Forever. With beards. Thank goodness for stalls with doors!
     

    Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    I don’t see anything with the term typical and I don’t feel like I was insensitive, but it’s not like it’s a term I use on a daily basis. I am sure your kids are wonderful and it’s great that you protect them. Just don’t rush to judgement too quickly. People don’t always mean harm. I used to care for a little girl who had multiple physical and medical issues and people would stare a bit. They felt sorry for her ( and they would say that) I explained that she was like any other little girl (because she was). They were not mean, they just needed informed. Her mother was always quick to judge and would publicly( and very loudly) yell at people. I hope you go to WDW and have a wonderful time with your boys.
    Thank you. It is exhausting to have to defend us all the time. It comes automatically. 8 years down and a lifetime to go. I’m grateful for people who understand.❤
     

    Lilsia

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Feb 17, 2018
    I have never understood (in a women’s restroom) why this is such a big deal. All the stalls have a door and even if someone can see slightly through the crack in the door your crack is facing the other way.
    It is different for adults that understand or with a challenged person, but I know when my girls where that age(7,8,9) and they saw boys their age in the restroom with them, it make them very uncomfortable. I am not talking about special needs children but typical boys that the Mom's just did not want them to use the men's restroom. They are taught in school and by parents that you use the restroom of your gender. If a 9 year old boy in school decided to go into the girl's bathroom they would probably call the cops on him now. I am sure that if a 9 year old girls went into the boy's bathroom it would be an issue too. Stall door or no, you are vulnerable in the bathroom. And let's face it, those stalls have gaps and are pretty flimsy. We have these rules as a society for a reason, right or wrong they are what they are. It is not right to just decide that rules do not apply to you(you in general, not you specifically).That is why so many places have family restrooms now to handle these situations. These are the rules that people expect and count on and if someone is uncomfortable with the opposite gender in the restroom with them then their feelings should be respected too. No one person's feeling and comfort should be placed over another's.
     

    limabeanmom2003

    Wilderness Lodge Memories
    Joined
    Feb 22, 2004
    I don’t think there will be any issue at all. You’re in there with them and if someone has a problem with it she can go use a different bathroom.
     

    North of Mouse

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Mar 31, 2011
    I don’t think there will be any issue at all. You’re in there with them and if someone has a problem with it she can go use a different bathroom.
    I don't think you are projecting the OP's opinion - see post #34 above. She says this is the way it will be even as men with beards, if no Family restrooms are available - that's the point - they 'are' at Disney, and some other places - even Target has one. Family Restrooms are for those situations. I would think similar situations are 'why' they are available in the first place - daddies with little girls, mommies with boys as the need arises.
     

    Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    I don't think you are projecting the OP's opinion - see post #34 above. She says this is the way it will be even as men with beards, if no Family restrooms are available - that's the point - they 'are' at Disney, and some other places - even Target has one. Family Restrooms are for those situations. I would think similar situations are 'why' they are available in the first place - daddies with little girls, mommies with boys as the need arises.
    Thankfully they are more and more common now.
     

    Treysar

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Oct 17, 2015
    It is different for adults that understand or with a challenged person, but I know when my girls where that age(7,8,9) and they saw boys their age in the restroom with them, it make them very uncomfortable. I am not talking about special needs children but typical boys that the Mom's just did not want them to use the men's restroom. They are taught in school and by parents that you use the restroom of your gender. If a 9 year old boy in school decided to go into the girl's bathroom they would probably call the cops on him now. I am sure that if a 9 year old girls went into the boy's bathroom it would be an issue too. Stall door or no, you are vulnerable in the bathroom. And let's face it, those stalls have gaps and are pretty flimsy. We have these rules as a society for a reason, right or wrong they are what they are. It is not right to just decide that rules do not apply to you(you in general, not you specifically).That is why so many places have family restrooms now to handle these situations. These are the rules that people expect and count on and if someone is uncomfortable with the opposite gender in the restroom with them then their feelings should be respected too. No one person's feeling and comfort should be placed over another's.
    Everyone does the best they can. No judgement here.
     
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